Chapter Seven
“Hey, chica. Where you been?”
Elena looked up from the phone in her hand as she pulled the side door by the kitchen closed behind her. She usually came in that way because it was closer to her room, plus if Matt and Hannah were on the couch, she wouldn’t walk in on them. “What?”
Hannah leaned in the kitchen doorway, her arms crossed. “I feel like I’ve barely seen you since you got back, and it’s been almost a month. How are you? What’s going on?”
Elena slid her phone in her back pocket and set her bag down. “I was hanging out at Daniel’s for a while. I know Matt just got back from his last trip a couple of days ago, so I thought you’d like some time to yourselves. Y’know,” she gestured toward herself, “third wheel?”
Hannah scoffed. “That’s not true. You live here. You shouldn’t feel awkward about coming home.”
Elena managed to stop herself from rolling her eyes. “Okay. Noted. Can I come in all the way, or is your ambush in the kitchen for a specific reason?”
Hannah didn’t hold back her eye roll. “It’s not an ambush. I was about to make some popcorn, and I heard you come in. That’s all.”
Picking up her bag, Elena took it to her room, which she’d finally finished unpacking and organizing last week. She took her laptop out of her bag, waiting for Hannah to say something else. When she didn’t, she unloaded the rest of her homework from her bag, setting it on her desk so she could work on it later. Hannah obviously wanted to talk.
“Is Matt not here?”
Hannah shook her head, sitting on the end of Elena’s bed. “Chris is playing tonight, and he went to Lance and Abby’s place to watch the game.”
“You didn’t want to go?”
Hannah shrugged, picking at fuzz on the comforter. “I had homework. And Abby wasn’t going to be there, so it was just the guys. I decided to stay home.” She looked at Elena, her green eyes brightening. “Plus, I thought it’d be fun to have a girls’ night. We could watch movies and eat junk food, or go out to a club or something if you want, like we used to.”
Leaning back against her desk, Elena crossed her arms, giving her friend a level look. “You want to go to a club.”
Her famous blush reddened Hannah’s cheeks, and Elena snorted. “We could. If you want to.”
Elena couldn’t believe how easily Hannah blushed, even at twenty-two. Any time she got flustered or nervous, not to mention embarrassed, all the blood rushed to her face. Elena knew all about Hannah and Matt’s sex life, both from Hannah dishing and overhearing things through the paper-thin walls when she’d stayed out in the living room to watch TV or read after her roommates had “gone to bed.” She’d only made that mistake twice before clearing off to her bedroom the same time they did. Or she opted to stay out late enough when Matt was home that they’d already be in bed by the time she got home. Hence her habit of coming in the side door.
The increasing amount of time she’d been spending with Daniel since the day she’d brought him that pie helped as well. And that was the reason Hannah was now cornering her and wanting a girls’ night. Even going so far as suggesting they go to a club. While Hannah had always come along, at least when she was single, Elena knew it wasn’t ever her favorite thing. Anymore, it wasn’t really high on Elena’s list either.
She shook her head. “Nah. I don’t really feel like going to a club.”
Hannah’s eyebrows went up a little. “Really? Been going too much lately?”
If that wasn’t a fishing expedition for information, Elena didn’t know what was. She couldn’t contain her chuckle. “No. I haven’t been to a club in ages.”
“How come? You usually love going dancing.”
Elena shrugged, turning to straighten some papers on her desk, put a few stray pens back in her pen cup, and organize her highlighters. “Just haven’t felt like it.”
“Elena, are you okay? Really? You haven’t been yourself this semester.”
Swallowing the lump that came to her throat any time someone asked about her wellbeing, Elena didn’t answer at first.
Hannah jumped in before Elena could figure out how to respond. “I know I kind of pressured you into moving. I’m sorry if you’re not comfortable. The situation at the time was … less than ideal.”
Snort. “Less than ideal? It was fucking awful.”
“I’m sorry. I really am. I thought having a house would be nice for both of us. I didn’t think—“
Shaking her head, Elena cut in, meeting Hannah’s pleading eyes. “No, Hannah. No. Don’t be sorry. It’s not the house or living with you and Matt that’s the shitty situation. It was this whole summer. And everything since. I’d still be like this even if we were in our old apartment or living on my own. It’s really not you. Please don’t think that.”
Hannah nodded slowly, her eyes going glossy with tears. “How is your dad? I haven’t wanted to bother you about him, but I worry.”
Blowing out a breath, Elena blinked back her own tears, shoving them down like always. “I know. I’m sorry I haven’t filled you in. I just—I hate talking about it at all. When I’m here I like to pretend that everything’s like it always was, but—“ She shook her head, looking down and biting her lip.
“It isn’t,” Hannah finished for her.
“No,” she whispered. “It isn’t.”
“Will you tell me now?”
With a shrug, Elena nodded. “Sure.” Her voice croaked, and she stopped to clear it. “He’s, um, I don’t know. Stable, I guess? He’s home, but you knew that, right?” Hannah nodded, and Elena went back to the organization of her desk supplies, needing to keep her hands busy. “Yeah. He’s home. And that’s about it. He’s better enough that he doesn’t need to be in a rehab place anymore, but he’s nothing like he was before.” She closed her eyes, two tears slipping past her eyelids despite her best efforts. “The doctors keep telling my mom to wait, to be patient, to let the different therapies have time to work.”
Scrubbing at her face with her hand to wipe away the rogue tears, she blinked hard and looked up at the ceiling, her old standby trick to convince the gathering tears to drain into her tear ducts instead of running down her face. “I don’t know, though. How long does it take? Shouldn’t there be some sign of improvement at least? Mom took the first six weeks off of school, most of it unpaid because her sick time doesn’t cover that long, and teachers only get two personal days per year. She’s taking him to occupational therapy and physical therapy and regular talk therapy. And he goes. He complained about it when I was still there, so I’m sure that hasn’t gotten any better. The rest of the time he sits on the couch and watches TV. That’s all he does. He lives in that one spot. Sleeps there, eats there, everything. It’s fucking depressing.”
Hannah made a low sound of distress that drew Elena’s attention. “I’m so sorry. That’s … worse than I thought. Is there anything I can do?”
Elena shook her head. “No. There’s not anything anyone can do. My mom’s still holding onto hope that he’ll pull out of it and go back to being himself again, I think. I don’t know. We don’t talk about it much. Her life is this long slog of taking him to appointments and trying to keep it together. I helped while I was there, and I’m still handling his clients for him until we decide what to do about that. But it’s been months, Han. I’m not sure he’s going to be able to come back anymore. And I don’t know how long I can keep things going on my own. This isn’t what I wanted to do. I mean, I know I helped him in high school, and it’s always been a good side job for me, but I want to be an attorney, you know? Go to law school. I can barely find time to study for the LSAT, and I’m supposed to take it next month.”
“Do you want me to help you with a study schedule? Or, I don’t know, I can quiz you or something. What can I do?”
Elena smiled. “It’s not that bad. I’m being a little dramatic. I am studying. It’s just hard to fit in with regular homework plus continuing to do work for my dad. I told Mom that I wasn’t going to take on any new websites after school started, but some of his longtime clients needed help, and I couldn’t tell them no. And then Mom convinced me to take on some new clients that other people referred. It’s kind of spiraled, and I need to pull it back. Or extend my deadlines. Or both.”
“Seriously, though. At least let me quiz you or correct your practice tests. Something.”
“Okay. I’ll let you know when I need that. Actually, um, you know Daniel? He’s been helping me study.”
Hannah’s eyebrows practically disappeared in her hairline. “Really? Daniel? You’ve been seeing him?”
Elena nodded, looking away again. “Yeah. We’ve been hanging out.” She gave Hannah a pointed look when she noticed the smile curling her friend’s lips. “As friends.”
Hannah gave her a pointed look in return. “Mmhmm. Sure. The kind of friends,” she held up her hands and made air quotes as she said the word, “you were in Westport?”
If she were Hannah, Elena would be blushing right now. Fortunately, she didn’t have that curse. “Yes. Exactly like that.”
That much was true anyway. That was where they’d first hooked up. And while they didn’t have sex every time they saw each other, it had happened several times since Lance and Abby’s wedding. She’d gone over and played Mario Kart again a handful of times, and if Evan wasn’t around—she still had a hard time calling him Coop like Daniel did—that usually ended with them naked. She’d made him another pie and brought along whipped cream the second time. When she’d texted Daniel about that one, he’d kicked his roommate out, and they’d had lots of naked fun.
Hannah nodded approvingly. “Well, good. You need something fun in your life right now. How long has this been going on?” She held up a hand, forestalling Elena’s answer as though it were actually forthcoming. “Wait. This is our girls’ night. I’ll go put some popcorn in the microwave. There’s some of the chocolate chip pie left that you made the other night. And there’s some wine still, right?”
“I think so.”
“Okay. You get the wine and glasses. I’ll get the rest. We’ll finish this conversation in the living room properly fortified. Dishing needs food and alcohol. Let’s go!”
Hannah hopped up, hurrying into the kitchen to get started, Elena laughing and following behind her more slowly. Maybe Hannah was right, after all. She felt a little better for telling Hannah what was going on, both with her family and with Daniel. Well, Hannah had mostly guessed on that, but she’d figured it out, so denying it seemed silly. And she never lied to Hannah.
Dishing about Daniel would also go a long way toward assuaging the guilt she carried with her over shutting out her best friend. But she’d pretty much shut out everyone as a way to shut off herself from the overwhelming emotions that she barely managed to keep at bay. Hannah didn’t deserve that, though. She’d come back to Richland during those first weeks, spending the days with Elena in the hospital, risking her choice internship by taking so much time off. The only reason she hadn’t been there more was because Elena wouldn’t let her lose the internship, knowing how hard she’d worked to get it, and how it had almost destroyed Hannah’s relationship with Matt. One of them deserved to get what they worked for. Especially since Elena wasn’t so sure that would happen for her after all. Her parents needed her, and she felt selfish insisting that she go to law school when she could keep her dad’s business running.
But she definitely couldn’t do both.