CHAPTER FIVE
Ruby
Sunday morning service is a tradition in my family, has been since I was a little kid. I’m not particularly religious, but even if you aren’t, you’re still expected to make an appearance.
“I promise, Mom, I’m fine!” I assure my mom for probably the nineteenth time since I showed up this morning. “The cop who helped me was nice, and there’s nothing to worry about. He took me home, took care of everything, and made sure I didn’t have to be scared. You don’t have to worry.”
“I’m just not used to you living on your own,” she worries, pushing my hair back, out of my face. “It’s an adjustment period for us, I’m not trying to crowd you, but please remember, you’re still our little girl.”
I want to tell her I’ve been on my own a while. When I was in college no one was there to make sure I came home at a decent hour, to make sure I went to class, or that I ate at a certain time. Funny how that worked out. I even had to make sure I did my own laundry. There was no one there to do that either. Moving back here has partially suffocated me, because now I have a whole family who’s worried about me constantly. I know I should appreciate it, but at the same time, it’s starting to get annoying.
“You were introduced to him from someone you work with?” my dad asks as he comes to stand next to us, resting his hands in his slacks pockets. “You didn’t meet him off of one of those dating sites, did you, Ruby? That’s so dangerous. I hope you have a better head on your shoulders than that.”
Jesus Christ. All I want to do is get out of here, and away from the inquisition. If they think all of these things about me, how do they think I managed to make it through college? It’s almost as if they still see me as a teenager.
“I promise I met him through a co-worker. I don’t even have a profile on those sites, Dad, and believe it or not, I managed to take care of myself for almost five years and get a degree. I’m good!” I try to hold the irritation out of my voice, but I don’t quite manage it.
My mom looks like she wants to say more, but wisely keeps it to herself. “I know we’re a little overbearing, but you’re our only daughter.”
I’ve heard this my entire life. My older brother, Lance, could legit go impregnate the entire town and they would throw a celebration party, but me? I should have sensibilities. It makes me wonder what they would say if they knew I’ve thought about Caleb since he left, wondered what would have happened if I’d been bold enough to invite him in yesterday.
“You coming over to the house for lunch?” Dad asks as he and Mom start walking to their car.
“Not today, I have a lot of papers to grade, laundry to do and all that adult stuff.”
I want to roll my eyes, but I keep from it. One day. One day they’ll see me as the capable person I am. Education isn’t the easiest program to go through, and I did it, graduating with honors. But nobody ever said anything about that, nope. Seems like they never will either.
As I wave goodbye to them, I get in my car, taking my hair down from where it’s pinned up. Driving through town, I stop at one of the three fast food places we have, and as I pull out, I see a Laurel Springs cop car blowing past, lights blazing. I wonder if that’s Caleb, or his dad. According to the text he sent this morning, he’s working a double today, and as I see the car navigate traffic, see people not get out of the way when they should, my heart is in my throat. I’ve never had anyone I care about have a job where they could get hurt. This is going to take some getting used to.
* * *
Sunday night grading papers has never been my idea of a fun time, so when my cell buzzes, I hope it’s Caleb. I know that he’s what they call on-shift, and because of the crazy amounts of rain we’ve had, they’re dealing with flooding. I don’t think I ever realized the hours other professions put in. He had to do a double today after working the late shift on Saturday. No wonder he naps when he can. I’d be a walking zombie if someone had me mixing up my days and nights like that. What I don’t expect to see is Karina sending me a message.
K: I heard through the grapevine you had a problem with the date that Trinity set you up on. My son was there to save the day?
R: Yeah, it was a hot mess in front of everyone at The Café. I’ll explain to Principal Taggert tomorrow morning, just in case. It was really embarrassing, but your son did save me. You should have heard how that conversation went he told me you’re his mom.
K: Ha! I bet there was a lot of explaining going on. I’m glad he was there though, I just wanted to check on you. See you tomorrow!
As I say my goodbyes to Karina, I throw my phone on my coffee table. I haven’t seen Caleb since we parted ways yesterday. I’m not even sure how late he’s working today.
What I am sure of is that I want to see him again. Tucking my lip between my teeth and going to sit on my couch, I send a text with my heart in my throat.
R: How was your day?
My hands shake as I wait for him to answer, and I wonder if this is the newness of our relationship, or if this is the guy I’ll have this with for the rest of my life. I don’t have the experience to know which is which, but what I do know is I like it. I like the fluttery feeling in my stomach, and I like the fact that he’s the one to give it to me.
Cruise
I’m cold, wet, fucking hungry, and really done with this goddamn day when I get the text from Ruby asking how my day is going. For a few brief minutes I don’t answer it. I contemplate lying to her, telling her it’s been a good one, and then forgetting she even made the attempt to text. Then I look at my team, realize that every single one of them has had a shitty day too, and they have women at home they care about. They lay those problems down at the feet of the women they share their lives with. They don’t sugar coat shit, they’re partners in the ways that matter, and I know that if I want this to go anywhere with Ruby, we’ve got to be partners.
C: Really fuckin’ shitty. I can’t talk about it right now, and I might not be able to text the rest of the night, but I want to see you. Soon.
“Where the fuck did this shit wash up from?” Havoc stands to his full height from his crouched position. He’s got his hands on his hips, looking down at a crate full of moonshine.
Over the past few years, we’ve almost eradicated the illegal sale and distribution of the shit that kills people. We’ve made huge strides and we’ve worked diligently with the state and county to get this shit off the street. This? This is a kick in the gut.
We responded to a call that said water had run over Pond Creek Road, and when we got here, that wasn’t a lie. What we didn’t expect to find were about five cases of moonshine floating for anyone to take. “You think it was hidden somewhere?” I crouch down to get a better look at it.
The bottles look old, reminiscent of the night when a friend of mine died after drinking a bad batch. To this day I can’t look at glass bottles like this and not relive portions of that night. Most everything we see these days is in some fancy bottle, not many people embrace the old ways anymore. Just looking at it makes me shiver, gets me emotional, and makes me wonder what he’d be doing now. Would he be working with us? Would he have a family? That’s the shit that sometimes keeps me up at night.
“It’s got mud caked on it.” Dad comes over to us. “But if it was in that creek bed, I mean it could have happened during the flood.” He runs a hand through his hair. “What makes you think it’s old?” He looks at Havoc, questioning the same thing I am.
“Don’t know.” He shakes his head. “A hunch maybe? This isn’t the product we’ve seen around here the past few years.”
“If you wanna get technical, we ain’t seen this product since Jefferson went to jail. We can send it off for testing, see where it came from,” Dad throws the suggestion out there. “For the most part we’ve eradicated production like this. If it comes into this town, it comes from out of state. We all know that.”
“Jefferson’s in jail,” I protest. “He’s still got a few more years left on his sentence, and Brooks is straight and narrow now. I mean he’s not gonna fuck up what he’s got with Trinity.” Everyone who’s seen them together and knows how happy they are knows he’s not going to mess it up. He’s worked hard to have a stable life; I don’t see him doing anything to ever fuck it up again.
Havoc gazes out over the raging creek that’s rushed it’s banks and now sits over the road. “Doesn’t mean he hasn’t taught someone else on the inside and then instructed them on what to do once they got out. I don’t know, I don’t like the feel of this. Maybe he had all that stashed, and somebody was waiting for it to be found.”
“I think you’re paranoid.” Dad claps him on the shoulder, leveling with his friend. “I think you’re looking for something that isn’t there. I mean we can investigate it, don’t get me wrong, but don’t let it consume your life. Things are going well for you and Leigh right now.”
“That’s why I’m worried about it. I don’t want anything to mess up what we’ve got.” He runs a hand over his mouth, almost like he can’t believe he let the words come out. He and Leighton have been through hell and back with her family, and I completely understand why he’s worried, but I’m with Dad; I don’t think it’s a source for concern at this point.
“Don’t let shit like this in your head and it won’t.”
I’m watching the two of them, constantly amazed at how their friendship works. Forever impressed with the way they speak to one another and how they take each other’s feelings into account, even when they don’t agree with one another. That’s the way mine and Morgan’s friendship works, only we don’t have a job together. Sometimes I’m thankful for that, because we do get a little shitty with one another now and again.
“So what do you want us to do with it?” I turn to Havoc for instruction. Ace and I found it when we responded, so it’s up to us to take care of it.
“Take it to evidence, send off some to the state lab, and see what they come back with. Once the water recedes, we’ll come out here and see if there are any clues or anything left. Right now you’ve worked nineteen hours straight, kid. Go home and get some sleep.”
He’s right, and I’m dead on my feet, but as I walk to my squad car, I realize I don’t want to go home to my empty apartment. I want to go to Ruby’s, have someone to talk to about this day. I wonder what she’d say if I laid my worries and my tiredness down at her feet. Would she make me dinner and put me to bed? Would she lay with me until I fall sleep? After long shifts like this, I sometimes have a really hard time turning my brain off. As evidenced by how it’s running a mile a minute right now.
I wonder what the answers are to all these questions. Would she be the person who holds me when I can’t sleep through the night? I want the answer, want it badly.
But tonight the answer won’t come. School is in session tomorrow, and all I need to do is crash.