Chapter Three
Back at home, Rafe stared at the clothes and the phone he’d retrieved from that bathroom trash can at the department store the previous night. He examined the items with a sick fascination. Would these be his last memory of her? The things she’d been wearing and using when she left?
It was a depressing thought.
Almost as depressing as realizing just how close he’d been to finding her. The store employee he’d talked to confirmed that he’d seen her only ten minutes prior. There was a chance that she’d been in the store at the same time he was, maybe even close enough to touch.
You know how to hide, don’t you?
Well, she’d done better than Rafe had expected. Perhaps it was arrogance, but when he’d left his place last night, he’d honestly believed he’d be coming back with a reluctant Diana in tow. With his training, it had never occurred to him that she might evade him. Which led him to wonder, just who was Diana Renquist? Because she definitely wasn’t the helpless woman in need of rescue she’d led him to believe she was.
“I can’t do this,” he muttered. His mind was too scattered to focus, but he couldn’t allow the trail to go cold. He pulled his phone out and dialed a number from memory.
Rafe waited impatiently as the phone rang. It dimly occurred to him that it was way too early to call anyone, but he didn’t give a fuck. Diana was out there in the world doing fuck all, and he had no way to tell if she was safe.
Listen to yourself. If she’s safe? You need to be worried about whether she’s selling you out right now.
He thrust a hand through his hair, feeling like his heart was going to beat out of his chest. She had no idea what the information she’d taken was worth. Not only that, how much heat it would bring on her. If word got around that there was a woman walking around New York with information on ORUS agents, she might as well have a target on her back.
Which just made his heart pound harder. It was too much, the idea of Diana out there alone where he couldn’t protect her. He needed Noah to wake the fuck up. Immediately.
He hung up and called back, letting the phone ring and ring. Finally a sleepy, gruff voice answered.
“Jesus, it took you long enough. Wake up. I need your help.”
He could hear rustling and then Noah’s voice whispering. A second later, he was back.
“I’m here. What’s going on, Rafe?”
“Diana’s gone.”
A pause. “Gone as in… Wait, did you two have a fight or something?”
Rafe growled. “She drugged me and then got into my safe somehow. I don’t know what happened. I didn’t have time to review much security footage before I left to track her. She took everything. Everything, Noah.”
A gasp on the other end let him know that Noah understood how serious the situation was.
“Fuck. Who do you think she’s working for?”
“I don’t know. But I need to find her before anyone else does. She probably has no idea what she’s gotten herself into. You can’t just sell this kind of information. Can you imagine what they’ll do to her? They won’t pay for it; they’ll just kill her and take it.”
Noah cleared his throat. “Rafe. You know Ian…”
“Don’t even say it. I already warned him that I’ll fuck him up if he touches one hair on her head.”
Quiet. Rafe gritted his teeth. He knew what his friend wasn’t saying. Threats wouldn’t stop Ian from sending agents after her if they discovered she was actually trying to sell ORUS secrets. Not to mention that he technically should be more worried about getting the information back than saving Diana’s skin. It was too confusing to think about in the moment, this strange compulsion he had to protect her, despite the fact that she’d clearly only been using him.
“I need Matthias,” he said quietly. It was humbling to ask for help and not the easiest thing to do. He’d been trained to be self-sufficient. Not to need anyone. But right now he’d ask for help from the devil himself if it got him what he needed.
Diana had managed to stay two steps ahead of him so far, but it was doubtful that she could evade someone with Matthias’s skill. Plus he had a few things that could help track her. He doubted that she’d remembered to wipe her old phone before she’d ditched it. She was clearly not the helpless innocent he’d assumed, but there was very little chance that she was on his level.
“I’ll find you,” he muttered.
The question was what would he do with her when he did?
“You know we’ve got your back. Anything you need, we’re on it,” Noah vowed. “I don’t know what her agenda is, but we’ll be ready.”
Protectiveness flared. “No one touches her.”
Silence. When Noah didn’t respond, Rafe’s heart rate increased, like he was preparing for a fight. It didn’t make any sense, his instinctive urge to protect a woman who’d done nothing but lie and steal from him, but his emotions weren’t taking directions from his brain right now. All he knew was that anyone who touched Diana would be on his kill list. The scariest part was he wasn’t sure he could check that urge, not even for his nearest and dearest friend.
“Rafe, we don’t know what this woman has in store for you. We need to figure out if she’s a threat.”
“No. One. Touches. Her.” Rafe squeezed the phone and then forced out a breath. “I’ll take care of Diana. Just get me an address.” Then he hung up.
The phone immediately started ringing again, but Rafe ignored it. Instead, he walked into his bedroom and stared at the mussed covers on the bed. Nothing made sense right now, but the only thing he knew was that he couldn’t let Diana get away.
Whatever this thing was between them, it wasn’t over.
Not by a long shot.
Diana dried the last dish and put it away in the cupboard. She turned around and watched as Charisse prepared a bottle for her son, who was currently smashing cheerios on the tray of his high chair. The little boy grinned at her.
“Here you go, baby.” Charisse kissed the top of his head as she handed him the bottle and then reached past Diana to pick up the dish towel.
“He’s so cute, Char. I almost can’t believe how big he is.” She sighed. It was one thing to talk to her friend on the phone and hear about her life and another to see it up close. This was real. Real and wonderful and exactly what she’d always hoped she’d have one day. She wouldn’t put this beautiful life her friend had created in jeopardy.
As if she could read her thoughts, Charisse squeezed her arm. “You really don’t have to go. Stay with us. I’m worried about your being on your own.”
Diana pasted on a smile she didn’t really feel. “I’m always on my own. That’s what I’m used to.”
“But you don’t have to be. Not anymore. We’re here for you, and we have the space.” She bit her lip. “Well, we can make the space. It’s better than my sitting here freaking out every day wondering what trouble you’re getting into.”
Diana walked out of the kitchen and down the hall to the spare bedroom she’d been staying in. Her friend had been so accommodating, but she knew Charisse’s husband Andrew had to be tired of sharing his office with his wife’s old friend from college.
She just had one more thing to do, warn Rafe, then she’d be in the wind. And she’d learned from experience, it was better to go to him than have him come for her.
“I know you’ve been worried about me. But you don’t need to worry anymore. I’m done playing detective. I found way more than I bargained for, and I’ve learned my lesson. This is what you wanted, right? For me to stop poking my nose into dangerous places? For me to move on with my life?”
Charisse stood in the doorway, watching her as she made up the futon where she’d slept.
“Yes, I wanted you to stop poking around, but you’re too far gone now. That’s like poking a bear until it wakes up and then deciding the game is over. You’ve got a monster to deal with now.”
Diana sat down on the edge of the futon, the stress of the past few days finally catching up to her all at once.
This was bad. Really bad.
“I wish I’d never opened that safe,” she whispered.
“But you did. So what are you going to do about it?” Charisse countered.
“I have no idea.” Diana figured she’d better come up with one fast because the kind of information she’d gotten her hands on came attached to some very bad people. People she’d been so sure she could trust.
“Having this information is like putting a target on my back.”
“Well, then put it back!” Charisse argued. “Maybe that’s all he’s waiting on. If he sees that you aren’t going to use it, then he shouldn’t come after you, right?”
Diana chuckled softly. Then an image of Rafe prowling after her like a big jungle cat made her breath catch in her throat. It wasn’t too far off the mark, was it? He was a predator. It was what he’d been trained for. The government wouldn’t have used him for all those years if he wasn’t great at his job. Clearly he was experienced at tracking down people far more savvy at this espionage thing than she was.
She was so far out of her league.
“I don’t think that’s going to fix this, Char. People like that don’t just forgive and forget.”
Charisse sat gingerly on the edge of the bed next to her. “Maybe not, but those people aren’t Rafe and Diana. I don’t care what you say, there’s more going on here. You care about him, and I don’t think he’d have taken care of you the way he did if he didn’t feel something too.”
“I felt something,” Diana finally admitted. “But I also lied to him. Plus he now knows that I was planning on drugging him since I had those pills in my purse. Whatever he felt is long gone now, I’m sure.”
And damn if that wasn’t a depressing thought.
Charisse put an arm around her shoulders and pulled her close. “Well then, just put the information back and then run like hell. You’ve watched him all these months, surely you know him pretty well by now. Use that. When you see an opening, take it. He’s not going to be expecting you to sneak back in, right?”
The more Diana thought about it, the more she liked the idea. Leaving and not coming back was truly her only option. But if she was going into hiding, it would be better if she didn’t have to look over her shoulder for Rafe the whole time. It was already going to be difficult evading her brothers. Now that she knew what they’d planned for her with Uncle Boris, she figured they wouldn’t take her disappearance in stride. She’d probably spend the rest of her life hiding from them. It would be better if she wasn’t trying to hide from Rafe too.
“Okay, I’m going to do it. I’ll wait for an opportunity and then sneak back in there. I just hope that’s the end of it.”
As Charisse hugged her tighter, Diana wished that wasn’t a lie. Because even with everything going on, she knew her heart definitely didn’t want this to be the end.
The traitorous thing was wishing hard for just one more chance to see Rafe.
Diana peered across the street, her eyes watering with intensity as she scrutinized every person who passed in front of Rafe’s building. She was waiting for him to leave so she could sneak back inside and leave the flash drive, along with a note to be careful and watch his back. It was a risky move, for sure, but she couldn’t risk leaving it anywhere else.
Maybe you should just erase it.
She bit the edge of her thumb as her mind flashed through alternatives. It was taking a risk to sneak back into his home and leave it for him. Hadn’t she taken enough risks lately? Diana sighed. Everything was so mixed up now, and there was no way to tell who was good, who was bad, and where she fit in. But despite everything, she still felt compelled to protect Rafe. He’d obviously kept these files secret for a reason. Maybe they were his insurance policy against the people he’d worked for. Whatever the reason, she knew he wouldn’t have kept them if they weren’t important. As illogical as it may be, she didn’t want these to fall into the wrong hands.
Erasing it wasn’t enough. She didn’t have a tech background, but even she knew there were ways to recover information that had been erased. Considering the kind of sensitive information on the drive, the safest place for it was back with Rafe.
Ten minutes later, she stiffened when she saw Rafe’s SUV pull out of the underground parking garage. This was what she’d been waiting for. He was on his way to work, so she could go drop this off and then be on her way. It was a scary thought, and Diana shivered. After this, she was on her own. There was no one that she could rely on. No one she could trust. Her only plan for survival was to run. Run! And never look back.
She took the elevator to the top floor and then crossed her fingers that her key would still work. It was her hope that Rafe hadn’t been able to get the locks changed so quickly. Another reason she had to move fast and do this now. If she didn’t do it now, she’d never have this opportunity again.
When the key slid in easily and turned, she let out an audible sigh of relief.
“Thank God!” Diana pushed the door open and then silenced the alarm. She had to move fast because knowing Rafe, his alarm system would notify him that it had been turned off. But she’d waited ten minutes before going in, so he was already across town. There was no way he could get back here and catch her in the next sixty seconds unless he sprouted wings and flew.
In shock, she looked around the apartment. It was a mess, which was so unlike Rafe. The books on the coffee table had been shoved to the floor, and when she reached the bedroom, her eyes took in the rumpled sheets and the clothes all over the floor. Rafe was usually so meticulous that he couldn’t stand to see anything that wasn’t in its place. He had a military-like love of order, and it made her sad to see what she’d driven him to.
This is what you’ve done to him. It’s better if you leave and never come back.
Although there was a selfish part of her that wanted to take her chances and confide in Rafe, seeing the tangible evidence of his rage made it clear just how unrealistic that hope was. She’d hurt him and betrayed him. Why would he care about what she had to say? Even if she explained everything and even if he believed her, there was no guarantee that he’d be willing to protect her. Why should he put his life on the line to protect a woman who’d lied to him from the start?
Diana dug in her pocket until her fingers hit the flash drive. She could put it back in the safe, and this would all be over. Just then she heard a noise behind her. Before she could even turn around, she was yanked backward and hit the wall.
“What—” Her scared squeak faded away when she saw Rafe towering over her, his face twisted into a mask of fury.
“You thought it would be that easy?” he growled.
Even as fear filtered through the shock, desire made itself known. Diana whimpered and clenched her thighs together as a tingle of awareness made her core clench. He looked furious, but somehow she knew he wouldn’t hurt her. Her knowledge was confirmed when he leaned over her, caging her underneath him, and buried his face in her neck. Diana sighed and angled herself to give him better access. What was it about his touch that made her so hungry for more? Her skin was practically crying out for him, and she’d only been gone two days.
“Do you have any idea how worried I was?” he rasped against her throat in between hot kisses to the bared skin. He began kissing his way up her jawline until he buried his hand in her hair and turned her toward him so he could cover her mouth with his.
Diana didn’t fight it, just melted beneath him and allowed him to direct how she moved. Her thighs opened of their own accord, and he moved right in between them like he belonged there. When he settled against her, everything inside her woke up and flared to life. Nothing else mattered but this.
She could fool herself that she’d come back to protect him or to keep the information from falling into the wrong hands, but there was no denying that a part of her had come back because she was drawn to him. Everything inside her wanted to be where Rafe was. Always.
“What are you doing?” she choked out when his hands went to the button on her jeans. She gasped again when he practically ripped the zipper off while pulling it down.
“Reminding you.” Rafe yanked his own shirt over his head and dropped it to the ground behind them.
“Of what?”
She gasped as his hand slipped inside her jeans and between her legs, the heat of his fingers branding her as it lit her on fire. Diana let out a harsh groan as those talented fingers rubbed and manipulated the aching flesh that suddenly felt very empty.
“Of whom you belong to. Whom this belongs to.”
Before she could respond to that arrogant statement, Rafe kissed her again, their tongues tangling wildly as they each fought to take control. Even though she’d always been an aggressive kind of woman, there was just something about Rafe that made everything feminine and soft inside her wake up and melt under his hands. Maybe it was the way he always slid one hand into her hair, like he wanted to hold her everywhere that just did it for her. Diana couldn’t pinpoint what it was, but every single time they kissed, she turned into a puddle of mush. This time was no exception. Within minutes, she was whimpering and rubbing against him, desperate for what she knew he could give her.
Despite the internal warning blaring in her mind that this was not a good idea, Diana started pulling frantically at her own clothes, almost breaking a nail in her haste to get her jeans down her legs. Her eyes took in his naked form greedily, trying to soak up all that sexiness just in case she didn’t get to see it again. Diana wasn’t fooling herself that this was anything other than a goodbye fling.
Even if Rafe didn’t know that yet.
Once they were both naked, he didn’t waste any time. He lifted her easily in a smooth move that made Diana want to sigh dramatically at the show of strength. But before she could focus on that, all her attention was pulled to where they were plastered together chest to thigh. With nothing between them now, she could feel everything. Every muscle, every twitch of his thigh.
Every twitch of that big, hard thing that was definitely not his thigh.
Diana was already getting lost in it, her whole being focused on touching her lips to every inch of the smooth skin presented to her. She ran her hands through his hair, loving the feel of the thick strands gliding through her fingers. As Rafe brought her higher, he bit her throat which caused her to arch her back slightly.
“So beautiful,” he whispered. “Don’t run away from me again. Need you.” He spoke so softly that Diana wasn’t sure if he’d intended her to hear that last part.
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry,” she repeated over and over. But instead of making it better, the soft words seemed to make him more frantic. His hands clenched her hips tighter, and his lips sucked at her neck.
“Why can’t I stop wanting you? Even when I know you’re lying to me, I still can’t stay away.”
Diana’s mind spun at his angry words. He wanted her despite everything she’d done. She experienced an almost dizzying elation at the thought before she shuddered in his arms. It was impossible to hold the train of thought while Rafe was licking her neck and her core was rubbing against his stomach, but she tried anyway. Then she thought of the flash drive.
“Rafe, I wasn’t trying to hurt you. I was scared. That’s why I ran.”
“I know you must be confused by the things you saw. But I would never hurt you, Diana.”
Diana clutched him tighter, wishing she could show him that it wasn’t about him. She hadn’t run away because of the things he’d done but because of the things she’d done. More than ever, Diana understood what it was like to do bad things for good reasons. She’d come here under false pretenses but only because she’d truly believed that Rafe had stolen her mother’s jewel and murdered her father in cold blood. If there was a way to go back in time and tell the Diana of a few months ago that she’d been deceived, that the men in her family weren’t the men she’d thought, things would have been different.
Then she cursed herself as a liar because she knew she wouldn’t have changed a thing. Even if she could go back, she wouldn’t stop herself from coming here because otherwise she would have never known Rafe. She would have never known what it felt like to be cherished.
Then she wasn’t thinking at all because Rafe lifted her and slid so deep that her eyes rolled back in her head. Diana screamed from the sheer pleasure, and Rafe paused, those dark eyes she loved, roaming her face to make sure she was okay.
“Too rough?” he whispered.
Her nails tightened in his shoulders, and he hissed at the pain.
Diana tightened her legs around his waist. “Don’t you dare stop!”
He grinned before he rocked his hips again, grinding deeper. They both moaned at the sensation, and Rafe’s fingers tightened under her ass. Diana clutched him closer, her hands roaming over his muscular back and shoulders as she hung on for dear life. He must have liked that because he growled, a low, sexy sound that instantly made her wetter before he set a frantic pace that had her head banging against the wall.
“Oh my God!”
Diana panted, taking in short, sharp breaths as her desire raced out of control. He was so strong, and the fact that he was holding her while he fucked her against the wall was such a turn-on. She purred as the thought of him controlling her body so easily made her think of the other ways he could take control. She wouldn’t have thought she’d ever like the idea of being restrained in any way, but every time he picked her up or held her still so he could do all these dirty, delicious things to her, it was impossible to pretend she didn’t respond.
Soon Rafe was grunting in her ear along with every thrust, and she felt the change come over him. He was rapidly losing control, his hips swinging wildly and his lips moving over hers frantically as he got closer. Diana loved it, seeing him lost in his pleasure, and she thrilled at the idea that she could make a man as stoic as Rafe lose his mind like this. She tightened her internal muscles around him, which felt so good that she moaned.
When he moved, he hit that spot that Diana hadn’t even known existed until a few weeks ago, and suddenly she was coming, biting and scratching as she wailed against his shoulder.
“Fuck! I can’t… Diana, I love you.” Rafe squeezed her so tightly that she almost couldn’t breathe, and then he shuddered as he came too.
For a long time they rested there against the wall until he pulled back slightly to put her down. When Diana looked down and saw the moisture on her thighs, she realized what they’d forgotten in their haste.
A condom.
“Oh shit.”