I was still throwing clothes into my suitcase when the door to my bedroom flew open. It hit the opposite wall with a thud.

I half expected to see another drunken couple invading my personal space.

Cameron stood in the doorway, wild red hair haloed by the light streaming in from the hallway.

"It wasn't what you think," he blurted out. That desperation was back in his voice.

"It doesn't matter." I avoided his eyes by concentrating on folding my clothes. "It's none of my business what you do."

"I wasn't going to kiss her."

"It's fine," I dismissed.

"She's a model," he pressed on. "I thought she wanted to talk about starring in our next music video. I didn't know what she was planning on doing. I wouldn't have…." he trailed off. "I didn't mean to hurt you."

I could hear the honesty in his voice. But it didn't matter, did it? Because even though I hadn't caught him kissing another girl this time, I knew it would happen eventually. And I didn't think I'd be able to take that without my heart smashing into pieces.

I continued putting my clothes in my suitcase, my back to him. I heard him close the bedroom door behind him.

"What are you doing?" he asked.

"Packing."

Cameron sat on the edge of my bed, next to my suitcase, so I had to face him. "Why?"

I folded another shirt, trying to keep my voice from shaking. "You were right. It's better this way."

"You don't need to go."

"You're the one who said I should. And I agree. This is what's best."

"Is it?"

The dejection in his voice made me stop. He looked lost, his dark blue eyes wide and forlorn.

"You said it yourself," I told him. "Whatever this thing is between us, it won't end well."

Cameron tugged on my shirt, drawing me close. I almost lost my balance in my surprise. I ended up pressed against him, standing between his spread legs as he sat on my bed. The heat of his hands on my hips seared me, even through my clothes.

He leaned forward and planted his forehead on my stomach. "I missed you this last week," he murmured.

My heart thumped in my chest. My fingers clenched into his muscles of his shoulders as I stared at the top of his head.

"You're the one who keeps running and hiding."

"I know. I'm sorry. I thought if I stayed away from you, I could make myself forget about you. I thought if I spent all my time at the studio, if I spent my time partying and drinking, I could forget how much I missed you." He leaned back and looked up to meet my eyes. "I thought I could forget how much I want you. But I can't."

My heart leaped into my throat at the confession.

"I want you so fucking much, Lily." His voice was rough, his eyes dark and piercing.

I swallowed hard. That was what I'd been hoping to hear for weeks. For months.

"I want you, too," I said softly.

He cupped my cheeks with both hands and pulled me down. I sat on the bed. Our legs pressed together. The firm muscles of his thighs sent my stomach quivering.

"I really am sorry you had to see that," he said. "I promise you, I honestly did think she just wanted to talk."

"I told you, it's fine. I believe you."

"I haven't been with anyone since you moved in," he said. "I mean, I could have. There were lots of women who…" He shrugged, looking almost embarrassed. "But I just couldn't stop thinking about you. Wanting you."

My heart gave a little flutter. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pressed myself against him.

"Good. Because I don't know if I can take seeing you with another woman like that again."

Cameron looked pained for a minute, before his expression turned fervent. Both blue eyes pinned me down.

"And I can't stand the thought of some other guy touching you."

Elation welled up in my chest. I opened my mouth to speak, to tell him everything I was feeling inside.

He brushed his thumb against my bottom lip, preventing me from speaking. Preventing me from breathing. That slightest touch sent my head spinning. The room swirled around me as I went lightheaded.

"I know how fucking wrong this is," he said hoarsely. "I know things will go to shit if I let this happen."

He brought his mouth close to mine, until our lips were a mere hairsbreadth apart.

"But I don't care anymore," he murmured. "I don't want you to leave. I want you to stay. With me."

He touched his lips to mine, soft and sweet. Just like our first kiss. Almost tentative, hesitant. It was the lightest touches, barely more than a brief brush of lips.

Cameron pulled back an inch. I whimpered at the loss. That smallest of space between us felt like a gaping void.

"Is this okay?" he asked.

I inhaled a shaky breath. The scent of him was warm and masculine, with a hint of something fresh, like a sunny, summer day. It made my head swim. I lost the ability to use words. I nodded instead.

He cracked a smile. "I want to hear you say it."

"Kiss me," I demanded breathlessly.

His lips returned to mine, firmer this time. He wound his fingers through my hair and tugged me closer. I clung to him, wrapping my arms around his neck.

He ran the tip of his tongue along the inside of my upper lip. A throbbing arousal centered between my legs.

He delved his tongue into my mouth, exploring and searching, taking my breath away. I kissed him back with abandon. The heat inside me rose with every touch of his tongue against mine. That warmth spread from my mouth, to my chest, to my belly, and lower.

His hands went to my hips to steady me, his fingertips exploring the exposed bare skin between my shirt and my skirt.

Shivers coursed through my body. My breath came in short bursts, gasping into his mouth. The sounds of the party raging outside my bedroom door were long forgotten. I was unable to care about anything except this man's lips, this man's touch.

I wanted more.

I scrambled to climb on top of him, knocking him back against the bed. He caught himself on his elbows with a laugh. I hovered over him, straddling his hips.

"So eager," he teased, taking note of my enthusiasm.

With Cameron lying back, I could feel the press of his hardening length against the zipper of his jeans. Could feel his length pressed against my core.

My face was flushed, my breathing rapid. The wetness between my legs was becoming a distraction. I wanted him. I wanted everything he had to give me.

But this was completely new to me. As excited as I was, as eager as I was, slight waves of apprehension started to tingle inside me. The tips of my fingers went cold as my nerves began to get the best of me.

"Hey." Cameron sat up and took my face in both hands.

I looked down, avoiding his eyes, ashamed. I wanted to do this. I'd practically jumped on him. I didn't know why I was so nervous.

"Lily, look at me."

I lifted my head to meet his eyes. Cameron examined me closely. I dug my fingers into the bedsheets.

He smiled and pressed a kiss to my forehead.

"Let's go back to the party," he said.

I blinked at the non sequitur. "What?"

"We can go jump in the pool." He gave me a crooked smile. "To cool off."

My breath hitched. Tears stung the back of my eyes. I threw my arms around his neck. He caught me by the waist.

"Thank you."

He cocked his head. "For what?"

"For understanding. For not pushing things."

He took my hands in his. He pressed kisses to my fingertips. "I will never push you into something you're not ready for."

"I thought I was ready. I don't know why I'm so nervous."

"It's okay to be nervous your first time." He gave me a quick peck on the lips. "Want to go back and enjoy the party?"

I looked down at our joined hands. I was still straddling his lap.

He was still hard.

I was still wet.

I gathered my courage.

"Can we go slow?"