Chapter Nine
Jade stared at her reflection in the bathroom mirror, pleasantly surprised and pleased with Kyle’s taste in women’s lingerie. Before opening the box from P.J.’s, she’d expected to find a sinfully erotic negligee, a scrap of nothing that left little to one’s imagination. Instead she’d discovered something infinitely more delightful.
The apricot-hued chemise Kyle had chosen was an old-fashioned blend of romance, innocence and sensuality, appealing to her softer, feminine side. The delicate stretch lace bodice shaped to her breasts, with a thin ribbon lacing up the center that tied into a dainty bow. The gown itself draped softly along her body to just above the knee, hinting at curves rather than ostensibly clinging to them. The matching bikini panties were made of the same stretch lace, sheer as a sigh, and nothing innocent about them.
Drawing in a deep breath, she met her gaze in the mirror. Gone was the sassy, carefree woman she’d displayed to the outside world. The woman with the green-golden brown eyes staring back at her was the Jade she’d kept hidden from everyone for the past three years. The vulnerable Jade. The Jade who wanted to believe in romance and happily-ever-afters so badly she’d created fantasies for just that reason.
But tonight was no fantasy, but reality in its purest sense.
And she was ready for it.
Before the jittery feeling in her stomach convinced her otherwise, she opened the bathroom door and stepped into the bedroom. More candles had been lit, giving the room a soft, iridescent glow. The bed had been turned down, the mattress sprinkled with more rose blossoms.
A movement from the corner of the room caught her eye. Glancing in that direction, she found Kyle sitting on the chaise longue, long legs stretched out and hands clasped over his belly. Dark, sexy eyes traveled from her face and slowly swept the length of her, making her body flush with a wanting so strong her knees threatened to buckle.
She didn’t know what to do. Didn’t know what an earthy, sexual man like Kyle expected. Her very limited experience in sex consisted of losing her virginity to a guy she’d been dating in college, a quick awkward romp in the back seat of his Mustang. And then there’d been Adam, who’d expected her to behave the way he thought was appropriate for a lady, in public and in the privacy of his bedroom—accommodating to his desires.
And the fantasies she’d written since Adam were just that—her own fictional version of romance and sexual desires. Now that she was facing reality for the first time in years, doubts and uncertainties surfaced. What if she didn’t please this man who’d so expertly pleased her? Worse, what if he found her lacking?
“You’re nervous,” he said perceptively, his voice a rich, low rumble of sound in the shadowed room.
“A little,” she admitted, her heart beating heavily beneath her breast. “It’s been a long time.”
“Yeah, for me, too.” His smile was warm and tender. “But you were definitely worth the wait.”
So was he, she realized. Confidence restored, she stepped toward him.
“Stop right there,” he said, his tone commanding and compelling enough to make her immediately comply.
She waited for him. He didn’t move, just sat there on the chaise. His gaze held hers, mesmerizing and disturbingly intense.
“Do you trust me?” he asked.
She remembered the note he’d sent her that had started this provocative adventure of his. “I came here, didn’t I?” Her tone was as impatient as she was starting to feel.
“Yes, but what’s going to happen tonight is going to change a lot of things between us. And before anything happens, I want to hear that you trust me enough to do anything I ask.”
Desire and ingrained apprehension mingled. “I…I do.”
“Then untie the bow on the front of your nightgown.”
Despite her promise to trust him, the part of her that refused to be dominated or controlled rebelled. She wasn’t sure she liked where this game of his was heading. And she certainly wouldn’t put up with being ordered around. “Kyle, I don’t—”
“Do it,” he said, cutting off her protest, “or the fantasy ends.”
His use of the word fantasy startled her, made everything within her snap to full awareness. “Fantasy?” Her cautious question demanded an explanation.
“Yeah. Mine, yours and soon to be ours,” he said mildly, a private, beguiling smile brushing across his mouth. “The latter is solely up to you.”
The choice was hers. She could either stop this erotic game of his now, knowing she’d regret her decision later, or she could go with Kyle’s fantasy, their fantasy, and see where it would lead.
Misgivings and inhibitions fled. She reached for the satin ribbon and tugged. The bow unraveled, the ties loosening as her breasts swelled and her nipples strained against the stretchy lace bodice.
She thought she heard him groan, but couldn’t be sure. His gaze was hooded as he watched her. Her eyes drifted lower, where his wide, bare chest expanded with each breath he took. The erection confined beneath the zipper of his jeans gave her a thrilling rush of feminine power she’d never experienced before.
In that moment, she realized she held her own share of control in this seduction. And she decided she was going to use it to drive him crazy.
Her mouth curved with a sultry smile of a woman confident in her sensuality. Without waiting for further instructions, she slipped her finger beneath the thin strap of her chemise, eased it over her shoulder and down her arm, then repeated the slow process with the other strap. The stretchy lace molded to her breasts, but she teased the edge with her fingers, gradually dragging it lower, until the lacy material bunched around her ribs and her breasts sprang free, full and aching.
This time Kyle’s groan was unmistakable. So was the quiver of excitement blossoming within her.
What had ever made her think this chemise was innocent? At the moment, it was the sexiest, most enticing piece of lingerie she’d ever worn. Daringly, she hooked her thumbs beneath the scrunched lace, inched it down her belly, then shimmied it over her hips. With a final push, the gown slithered down her legs and pooled at her feet. A sudden surge of modesty kept her from removing her panties.
Kyle moved off the chaise and toward her in a lazy, unhurried stroll. He circled around her without touching her, and she began to tremble with a need so great it was all she could do to stand still.
He stopped behind her, and with his hands on her hips, he moved her two steps to the left, until they both came into view of the oval dressing mirror. Another fantasy flashed through her mind, of watching her lover arouse her, but she refused to let it intrude on this wonderful reality.
She stared at their reflection, haloed in a golden glow from the candlelight. Kyle towered over her, his broad frame visible behind her in the mirror. His smoldering gaze met hers, and he smiled as he glided his large hands over the indent of her waist and up to cup her full breasts in his palms. His thumbs grazed over her sensitive nipples, making them peak and tighten. A moan rolled into her tight, aching throat.
“So beautiful,” he purred against her neck, his breath a warm caress that sent shivers through her. He slipped his fingers into the sides of her panties, caught the elastic band around his thumb, and whispered in her ear, “Watch.”
She was too mesmerized to do otherwise. Her gaze remained riveted on the mirror as Kyle slowly dragged her panties over her hips, then inched them down her thighs, baring her. His warm, damp mouth nuzzled the nape of her neck, then pressed kisses down each vertebra as he slid that scrap of lace lower. By the time his sweet, tormenting lips reached the base of her spine and her panties tangled around her ankles, her entire body thrummed with a wanting greater than anything she’d ever known.
He nipped gently at her buttocks, and shock waves of pleasure rippled through her. When his tongue gently soothed the love bite, she all but melted. Her hands clenched into fists at her sides. She wanted to touch him, feel his strength beneath her fingertips, make his body come alive the same way he was making hers burn.
“Kyle…” It was all she could manage.
“Turn around, Jade.” The command was husky and gentle at the same time.
Jade took one last quick look in the mirror, her gaze dropping to just below her bikini line, to the dainty, but permanent reminder of her brief rebellion after Adam. The colorful but delicately etched butterfly was her most private, treasured indulgence, and one she’d never regretted.
But that didn’t mean she wasn’t the tiniest bit nervous about someone discovering her intimate secret for the first time.
Stepping from her panties, she turned and faced Kyle. He sat back on his heels, his hot gaze devouring every feminine detail of her body. Unable to remain unaffected by his bold perusal, she flushed from head to toe. Never had she felt so vulnerable. So susceptible. Physically and emotionally. She resisted the urge to snatch her chemise back up from the floor and cover herself.
He reached out and touched her, smoothed his splayed hands up her trembling thighs. “Ah, Jade, you’re perfect,” he murmured, his voice smoky with passion. His thumbs brushed over the brown curls protecting her femininity, slid sinuously into the dampness and heat of her body, and skillfully stroked her with the dewy moisture greeting his touch. “Absolutely perfect”
She moaned. Her head fell back and her body arched toward his questing fingers. Feeling a familiar sensation tingling in every vital, feminine spot, she reached out and grabbed his shoulders for support. When he slicked his thumb, warm and exquisitely wet from her, over her tattoo, her breath whooshed out of her lungs.
“You’re full of surprises, tiger, aren’t you?” There was a pleased smile in his dark voice. He leaned forward, pressed a hot, openmouthed kiss on her tattoo, and licked away the intimate moisture he’d just rubbed there as if sampling a rare delicacy.
Before she could recover from that shuddering, sensual onslaught, that soft, wicked tongue of his moved impatiently on, tasting her skin, swirling into her belly button, then lapped upward, to her breasts. He suckled her, teased her, tormented her with his mouth, his teeth, his tongue, until she was whimpering, gasping and rubbing against him in a shockingly wanton way. Never, in all her fantasies, could she have imagined such raw hunger, such burning need as she experienced with Kyle.
Gently he grasped the hands digging into the muscles along his shoulders and placed them on his chest. He lifted his head to look at her. The wild beating of his heart beneath her palm, and the tight line of his expression told of his restraint. The glittering heat in his gaze told of his desire for her…the same need that ran thick and molten through her veins.
Slowly he dragged her hands down honed muscles and hot skin. Her fingertips grazed over the light, sexy trail of hair swirling around his navel then disappeared beneath the front waistband of his jeans. He stopped there, removed his guiding hands from her slender wrists, then threaded all ten of his fingers through her hair, tilting her face up to his. “Undress me,” he dared in a soft whisper, and lowered his mouth to hers.
It was extremely difficult to accept a challenge, let alone concentrate on it when she felt as if she was drowning—in the slow, silken, heated pleasure of his kiss. Desperate with the need to have him as naked as she, to feel him deep inside her, she fumbled with the top button of his jeans and struggled to lower the zipper over the huge bulge tightening the front of his pants. She nearly cried out in relief when finally, the front placket spread open. Not wasting a second of time, she slid her flattened palms into the waistband of his jeans and boxer shorts, pushed them over his lean hips, slid the soft, faded material over his buttocks and down his hard, toned thighs.
Amazingly, without breaking the lush, seductive kiss, he managed, with a few growls of frustration that reverberated deliciously against her lips, to step from the confining denim and kick it aside.
She wrapped her hand around his shaft, and he shuddered and groaned into her mouth. She stroked the thick length of him in her palm, glanced her thumb over the plum tip, and was rewarded with a drop of moisture that made her realize just how close she was to driving him crazy.
It was a heady, exhilarating feeling, and she reveled in it.
Kyle sucked in a ragged breath as Jade continued to tease him to the brink of mindlessness. After weeks of dreaming about this moment, he wasn’t about to have the sizzling sexual buildup end in the palm of her hand. He’d like to think he had more finesse and control than a horny teenager, but that’s exactly how she made him feel, like a lust-crazed kid experiencing sex for the first time.
The familiar tightening in his loins warned him how close he was to an explosive orgasm. Grabbing her wrist, he jerked her hand away from his jutting flesh the same moment he broke their lengthy kiss. “Stop,” he hissed.
She looked up at him, her eyes wide and startled and brimming with confusion.
He swore mentally, disgusted with himself. Certainly Jade’s fantasy lover had never had so little self-control!
He needed to explain, to wipe away the doubt in her expression, and drummed up the patience to do so. “Sweetheart, I want you so badly that if you don’t stop touching me the way you are it’s going to be over before it even starts. Unfortunately, Charlie has a mind of his own, and when you touch him, the only thing he can think of is how soft and warm your hand is, and how much better it would feel to be deep inside you… The thought is powerful enough to make him think he is deep inside you.”
When his meaning caught on, strangled laughter caught in her throat.
“It’s the truth,” he stated, feigning indignation and biding time to allow his ardor to cool before they continued. Framing her face with his hands and staring deep into her eyes, he guided her back toward the bed.
“This first time it’s gonna be slow and easy.” His lips plucked at hers, drawing a soft sigh from her. He felt her soften, relax, and thought of the endless hours of pleasure that awaited them. “And later, it can be as fast and wild as you want it to be. We’ve got all night long, tiger…to make love, fulfill fantasies and do all the things to each other we’ve been wanting to do for months. That I’ve been wanting to do to you for months.”
“Yes,” she said as he pressed her down on the mattress. Her heated skin slid across the soft petals sprinkled over the sheet, releasing a lush, intoxicating fragrance of roses and aroused female flesh that went straight to his head. “Oh, yes.”
He lifted a brow as he knelt on the bed by her feet. The intensity of the moment had passed, but he liked this playful side of sex, too. “So, are you admitting there’s been a few things you’ve been wanting to do to me?” He picked up her right foot, pressed a kiss to the sensitive arch, then bit gently into the pad of flesh just beneath her toes.
She gasped, and from his vantage point he watched the muscles in her belly contract, could see her nipples peak as she arched her back sinuously. “Maybe one or two,” she all but purred.
“You can have your way with me later.” Smiling, he traced the gold anklet adorning her leg—the only thing she wore besides the rosy-hued flush painting her body. “Right now, I’m gonna show you what I’ve fantasized about doing to you.”
Skimming his hands up both her calves, he gently urged her legs apart and moved in between. Then, starting with her right leg, he pressed a damp kiss to the inside of her knee and leisurely nibbled and licked his way up the inside of her thigh. He gave the same treatment to her other leg. By the time he reached his ultimate destination, her body was taut and trembling, her breathing ragged.
“Kyle…” Her quivering voice held a wealth of vulnerability and uncertainties.
“Shh, sweetheart, let me,” he murmured. Splaying his hands on the inside of her slender thighs, he pressed his mouth against the heat between her legs, grazed his tongue along the satin-soft feminine folds of her body, wanting her to trust him in every elemental way.
And, incredibly, she did. He felt it in the gradual unfurling of tension in her limbs, tasted it in the sweet wonder of her body, heard it in the sexy, breathless sounds she made. And, ultimately, he experienced it in her unequivocal surrender as he coaxed her to a slow, escalating climax, then sent her soaring over the edge.
She cried out and clutched a fistful of sheet and rose petals as her body writhed with the force of her release. Once her orgasm ebbed, once she could breathe without gasping, she tangled her fingers in his hair and tugged.
He looked up over her beautifully sprawled, satiated body, meeting eyes fever bright with desire. He continued to caress that ultrasensitive nub of flesh with his thumb, slid a finger deep enough to make her breath catch, and knew it would be so easy to make her come again.
“Tell me what you want, Jade.” The decision would be hers. He’d spend the night giving her every physical pleasure she could wish for short of the actual act of sex if that’s what she wanted.
“You,” she said softly. “I want you…I need you, inside me.”
A giant shudder reverberated through Kyle. Even in his passion-induced state, the significance of what she was offering, what she was asking for, didn’t elude him. Physically, she was giving him her body; emotionally, she was bestowing him with a gift more precious than anything anyone had ever given him before. Complete, unconditional trust. Honest faith. Possibly even love. And damn selfish as it seemed, he wanted everything she was willing to give. Which was everything missing from his life.
He reached for the protection he’d left on the nightstand earlier, but before he could sheath himself, her fingers curled around his wrist, stopping him.
She ran her tongue across her bottom lip. “I went on the Pill after we, umm…agreed to…”
Grinning at her shyness, he lowered his hard, aroused body over hers, threading his fingers through her hair. “I understand, and I’m thoroughly grateful. There’s nothing more I’d like than to have nothing between us.”
“Me, too.” Sighing blissfully, she closed her eyes, dragging her hands down the slope of his back. Automatically, openly, she wrapped her legs around his hips, cradling him close. His erection slipped against soft, damp flesh, unerringly found that place where two became one, and although every molecule within him screamed to thrust hard and deep, he held back.
Jade’s lashes lifted, a beguiling smile curling her mouth. “Has it been so long you’ve forgotten what to do?”
He laughed and started to say something about her sassy mouth, but he got distracted by a sudden discovery. “Hazel,” he murmured, awed by his discovery.
She frowned up at him.
“Your eyes,” he said, wondering why he hadn’t noticed earlier. Probably because he was so used to her hiding behind her colored contact lenses. “They’re hazel.”
“Yeah, they are,” she said shyly.
He smoothed his thumb along her jaw, guessing how difficult it had been for her to bare so much to him, and wondered what it meant in terms of her feelings for him. “They’re beautiful, Jade. Green and gold with just a hint of brown at the centers.”
Color rose in her cheeks at his compliment, which was endearing considering the other things he’d done to her tonight which hadn’t embarrassed her. “They’re very ordinary.”
“There is nothing ordinary about you.” Done talking, he kissed her. A long, wet, passionate kiss that stoked the banked fires within them, until Jade was moving restlessly beneath him, her legs urging him downward, her hands frantically urging his hips forward.
He pushed inside her, stretching her, groaning as her silky heat enveloped him until he was fully embedded inside her body. He was enraptured by the way she complemented him so perfectly. Moved by the fragile, emotional bond linking them in a far more meaningful way than a simple, casual affair.
There was nothing casual about the intense feelings this woman evoked in him. Nothing simple about wanting her in his life when he’d avoided commitment for all his adult years.
She gasped sharply as he began to move, her back arching toward him as he retreated, then returned, surging deep. He softened their kisses, murmured encouragements and darker suggestions, reached between their damp bodies and stroked her where they joined.
Her pleasure became his own. As he followed her into that dark, erotic abyss, he knew what it was like to need someone with every fiber of his being. Knew what it was to want to hold on and never let go. To feel so much, and still need more.
He felt it with Jade.
* * *
“Open up and say ahh,” Kyle cajoled.
Jade’s brows rose. “You don’t expect me to take all of that in my mouth, do you?”
“Naw,” he drawled, smiling wickedly. “Just a little at a time.”
Kneeling on the mattress in front of where he stood by the side of the bed, she regarded the tempting offering he held in his hand, while he contemplated just how tousled and incredibly bewitching she looked. After making love she’d donned the chemise he’d bought her; reluctantly, he’d granted her that small measure of modesty for now, though he did notice that she hadn’t bothered with the panties. The ribbons on the bodice were still untied, and a thin strap had fallen down one shoulder, giving him a titillating glimpse of her breasts and the way her nipples thrust against the stretchy lace.
Her sexy, kittenish pose reminded him of a page straight out of a centerfold magazine. She looked like every man’s carnal fantasy come to life, innocence blended with the hint of sin sparkling in those soft green-gold eyes of hers.
Tilting her head, she slid her tongue provocatively along her bottom lip. “Can I lick the chocolate off?”
His chuckle rolled into a masculine groan. “Tiger, you can do anything you like…and as much as I might enjoy watching that, it’s much better if you just try it the way it is.” He rubbed the smooth, chocolate-covered tip against her pink lips, still swollen from all the lusty kisses they’d shared earlier. “I was assured this is quite a delicacy.”
“Well, I suppose I can open myself to a new experience.” She parted her lips, and Kyle slowly, teasingly, slipped the candied wedge of peach into her mouth. Closing her eyes, she bit down. A groan of pure pleasure rolled into her throat as she savored the exotic flavor filling her mouth.
Kyle watched a delightful smile curve her lips, saw the ecstasy chasing across her features, and resisted the urge to pull her to him for a hot, peach-sweet kiss. He knew it would inevitably lead to him dragging her beneath him, nudging her thighs apart, and burying himself so deep inside her warmth and softness there would be no distinguishing where one ended and the other began.
The image caused his masculine parts to stir beneath the front of his boxer shorts. Soon, he thought, enjoying this simple moment of pleasure with Jade far too much for it to end just yet.
He rubbed the sticky-sweet peach along her lips. “More?”
Her lashes lifted slumberously. “Mmm. All of it.”
Continuing with their playful innuendo, he feigned shock. “Are you sure you can handle it all at once?”
Grasping his wrist, she brought the candied fruit to her lips. “Let’s try it and see.”
Not only did she eat the peach in one very sensual bite, she licked the melted chocolate from his fingers. She gave the task more attention than it warranted, yet stopped way too soon for his liking.
“That tasted…incredible.” She smiled up at him, like a contented feline who’d indulged in a bowl of rich cream. “You do wonderful things with peaches.”
He could think of at least a dozen other things he’d like to do with those peaches, to her…erotic, decadent games beyond her wildest fantasies. But kept them tucked away for another time.
He reached for the glass of chilled wine he’d put on the nightstand, next to the box of chocolate-covered peaches. “I aim to please,” he said, tipping the glass to her lips.
She swallowed a drink, then let her gaze roam appreciatively down his body. “Oh, you do.” Her voice was breathless.
He couldn’t help but feel a surge of male satisfaction. There was something about this woman that made him want to please her.
Settling himself on the bed next to her, and bringing the box of sweets and glass of wine with him, he propped himself up on his elbow.
“This adventure of yours was quite a surprise,” Jade said in between him feeding her bites of peaches and sips of wine. She crossed her legs, making herself more comfortable. “I’ve never felt so special. Thank you.”
He smiled. “You deserve to be spoiled, Jade. And I like doing it for you.”
She slanted him a look tinged with disbelief. “I never would have pegged you for a romantic.”
Before Jade, he hadn’t given much thought to indulging the women he’d dated. Had never let any of them close enough for his emotions to get tangled up in the relationship. “There’s a first time for everything.” Even love, he thought, growing used to the idea of giving Jade a part of himself he’d thought he was incapable of giving. “Besides, you’ve got a couple of surprises up your sleeve, too. Or should I say, hidden away in your panties.”
A blush stole across her cheeks, and she absently smoothed the hem of her chemise over her thighs. “I take it you’re referring to my tattoo.”
“Ummm…among a few other treasures hidden in your panties,” he said wickedly. Feminine wonders he’d thoroughly enjoyed. Definitely unexpected, though, had been her tattoo. “What made you do it, Jade?”
She shrugged. “Just a crazy, wild impulse.”
Her explanation seemed too simple. Too easy. “Something must have spurred that impulse. Or someone,” he added, suspecting the latter.
She looked away, pretending interest in a watercolor painting on the wall. He wasn’t fooled by her evasion. Unwilling to let her avoid this very important discussion, he gently grasped her chin and turned her face to his again. He saw the faintest hint of pain in her eyes, could see her reluctance to drag the past out in the open.
“Tell me, Jade,” he urged, experiencing a swell of tenderness that came straight from the heart. “I’m not here to judge you, but I need to know what happened in your previous relationship that has made you so, well…distrusting of men.”
She didn’t deny his claim. But she didn’t venture to elaborate, either.
He sighed, skimming his thumb down the slope of her tense jaw. He’d pursued this very stubborn woman for six months, unexpectedly fallen in love with her in less than two. There was no way he was going to let something so obviously important to their future fall by the wayside.
“You’ve trusted me with everything else tonight,” he went on, attempting a more ruthless, straightforward approach. “I’d like to think you can trust me with your past.”
Jade stared at the man who’d come to mean so much to her in such a short span of time. A man who’d tapped into her deepest secrets and desires and restored her confidence as a woman. A man who’d given her so much and asked so little in return.
Needing to relax the knot in her belly, she reached for the glass of wine he held and drained what little was left of the pale gold drink. Liquid courage, she thought with inner mockery as she set the empty glass on the nightstand behind her, then refocused her gaze on anything but Kyle.
“I met Adam Beckman at a cocktail party hosted by a client of mine who owned a finance firm,” she began, easily recalling that fateful night. “Adam worked for him. He was quite charming, and I have to admit that flattery got him everywhere.” She smiled wanly. “We started dating, and things got serious between us real fast. Before I knew it, I was totally wrapped up in Adam, willing to do anything to please him or to be with him.”
She smoothed her damp palms down the cotton covering her thighs, while her heart thudded in her chest. Other than her sister and parents, no one knew how devastating and emotionally destructive her relationship with Adam had been.
She lifted her gaze to Kyle, not sure what she expected to find. He was quiet, but watchful and tremendously patient. His silent strength gave her the fortitude to go on.
“After a couple of months of dating, Adam started making mild suggestions to change my appearance…like my hair. It was waist-length and thick, and while I liked to wear it down, he preferred it up, though he insisted I not cut it.” She found herself touching the wispy hair at the nape of her neck, not regretting the day she’d sheared off the length shortly after her breakup with Adam. That bit of defiance had felt glorious.
“He didn’t like makeup, so I started wearing very little, and pale colors at that. Next came my clothes. Adam insisted if I was going to be the girlfriend of a high-powered executive, I needed to look the part.” Not like some trussed-up Barbie doll, she remembered him saying. “We went shopping for a new wardrobe and Adam chose conservative suits and dresses in dark, drab colors.” Looking back, she realized Adam’s ploy…to downplay her appearance so he’d upstage her in his fancy, expensive designer clothes. And he had. She later learned he was a man who needed to feel superior, even at the expense of others.
Finding a rose petal in the folds of the sheet, she rubbed the silky-soft blossom between her fingers and spared another glance at Kyle. He said nothing, but the tight line of his jaw spoke volumes. He didn’t like what he was hearing. She supposed that made them even, because she hated relaying the awful experience.
“My appearance wasn’t all he altered,” she said quietly, her voice hushed in the too-quiet bedroom. “Adam was controlling and dominating and had certain ideas of what I should be and how I should act. In public and in private. He even started keeping track of my whereabouts, where I went and who I saw. And I fell right into his trap, letting him influence me to the point that I was no longer the person I’d been before him, but a compliant, docile woman he’d shaped and molded to his warped expectations.” It had happened so quickly. Too easily. Frighteningly so. “I was so caught up in our relationship, I couldn’t see just how destructive Adam’s manipulation was.”
Needing space, she slid from the bed and walked over to the floor-to-ceiling window in the room. Kyle had opened the drapes earlier, and from sixteen stories up, they had a fabulous view overlooking the city. The twinkling lights with a backdrop of black velvet soothed the upheaval of emotions within her.
“What happened, Jade?” Kyle asked, his voice strong and steady from behind her.
She shivered and wrapped her arms around her middle, chilled by the memories leaping to life in her mind. The worst was yet to be told, but having already come this far, and trusting Kyle more than she thought possible, she shut out the pain and focused on purging herself of the past.
“My sister and parents expressed their concern over the erratic changes in my behavior and appearance,” she said, not daring to look at Kyle for fear of losing her confidence to go on. “A part of me—the part that was in love with Adam—resented their interference and denied the truth. I was determined to prove my family wrong about Adam.”
The silence in the room was absolute. He was waiting for her to go on, and she was dreading what lay ahead…reliving the singularly worst night of her life. Her stomach churned, and the pressure in her chest increased to an unbearable tension.
She pushed the turmoil aside. “Adam received a promotion at work, and I threw him a surprise party inviting our friends and family. I wanted to look my best, and I also wanted to show my family that Adam wasn’t as bad as they were making him out to be. So I went and had my makeup done, then my hair styled, leaving it down so it fell to nearly my waist in soft waves. I bought a new dress, an ankle-length sheath that was sexy in a very subtle way, though it had a slit that showed more leg than any of the other outfits Adam chose for me.”
She touched a hand to the cool windowpane, a faint smile touching her lips. “I remember looking in the mirror, thinking that for the first time since dating Adam I felt pretty, feminine and desirable. My last thought was that I hoped the way I looked pleased him.”
She drew in a ragged breath, and let the rest of the story rush out before she could stop it. “But when he walked into the party and saw me talking to a male colleague of his, all dressed up and looking as my sister put it ‘like a knockout,’ he turned absolutely livid.” She shuddered when she recalled how his eyes had flashed with cold fury, how he’d advanced on her with a look of utter contempt, how his voice had dripped pure disgust. “In front of my family and friends, he informed me that he wouldn’t be seen with a woman who dressed and acted like a hooker, then left the party being held in his honor.”
“Bastard,” Kyle muttered from behind her.
“I was completely mortified and humiliated,” she said with a choked little laugh, not so surprised to feel the hot sting of tears prick her eyes. She’d been holding them back for three years now. “I just wanted to die of embarrassment.”
She heard the creak of the mattress as Kyle got off the bed, saw his reflection in the window as he approached from behind. Felt her taut body sag in relief as he slipped his arms around her waist and pulled her flush against his chest, his belly, his thighs, surrounding her in a wonderful heat that chased away the lingering coldness inside her.
“Ahh, sweetheart,” he breathed, his lips pressing gently against her neck. “I’m so sorry.”
She closed her eyes, absorbing his warmth and caring while trying to hang on to her composure. “At first, I was devastated,” she admitted, needing to finish what they’d started. “But my sister and parents helped me through that crisis. Without Adam’s daily influence I realized just how much control he had over me. And it was then I swore I’d never let any man close enough to manipulate me that way again.”
Kyle linked their fingers together in front of her, keeping her close, trying to ease the trembling still shimmering through her body. Now he understood her reluctance to get involved with him or any man. And more than ever, her fantasies made sense. With an imaginary lover she was safe to express her wants and needs, without the threat of being controlled, because she was the one to dictate the level of intimacy.
“So, after Adam you rebelled.” Like the delightful butterfly of her tattoo, she’d emerged from her cocoon.
“Yeah, I did.” She leaned her head against his shoulder. “I went out and bought new clothes in bright colors, cut my hair and even started wearing colored contact lenses to match my outfits. It was my way of coping with what had happened. And to prove just how independent I was, one day I decided to get a tattoo. Something that no one could ever take away from me.”
He smiled, understanding her rebellion all too well. He’d coped with his own childhood and his father’s disregard with wild, shocking acts of defiance himself.
Feeling as though they’d made tremendous progress this evening, he turned her in his arms. His eyes found hers, locking tight. “I happen to love your butterfly…but I don’t think I like the idea of anyone else seeing it.”
She lifted a brow, and he was glad to see the haunting shadows gone from her gaze. “Other than the artist, you’re the first person who’s seen it. And certainly the first to touch it.”
He couldn’t help himself, his chest puffed out arrogantly. “And I prefer that no one else does.”
Too late, he realized just how possessive he sounded…how dominating. The way she visibly bristled confirmed it.
“Tiger,” he said gently, brushing his knuckles down her cheek. “This isn’t a control issue. You’ve got to believe I’ll always respect your independence, and I’d never try to dictate your life.” The emotions he’d been holding back welled inside him, demanding release. “But there’s something you need to know.”
Her brows furrowed above eyes shaded with wariness. “Yes?”
“I’m falling in love with you, Jade.” Surprisingly the words he’d never spoken to another woman came much easier than he’d expected. “Never mind falling. Hell, I am in love with you.”
She gasped in shock, her jaw falling slack.
It wasn’t the reaction he’d hoped for, but then he’d had more time to get used to the idea of being in love than the handful of seconds he’d just given Jade. But he’d bet The Black Sheep she felt the same way—she just didn’t realize it yet. “I know we agreed to a no-strings-attached affair…” And he’d thought that would be enough. “But somewhere along the way I fell in love with you.”
“Oh, Kyle.” Jade reached up and lightly touched her fingers to his cheek, shaken to the very core by his declaration, which she found both sweet and terrifying. “I care for you a great deal, but…” I’m so scared of giving someone that part of myself again. So scared of letting emotions overwhelm my better judgment.
But she feared she already had.
A tremulous smile touched her lips. “Give me a little time, okay?”
“As much as you want.” Grasping her hand, he pressed a kiss in her palm, his eyes glimmering with renewed warmth. “As much as you need. And while you’re thinking about it, why don’t we enjoy the time we have together? I want you again, Jade. I don’t think I’ll ever get enough of you.”
And she him. “Yes,” she whispered. Heated desire coiled through her. The anticipation of his touch, his possession, made her breathless.
In one smooth motion he pushed his shorts down his legs and kicked them off, then pinned her against the wall with his hot, fully aroused body. She moaned as his mouth dropped over hers, his tongue delving deep while his hands slipped beneath the hem of her chemise and skimmed up the back of her thighs to her buttocks. He lifted her, bracing her, the tip of his erection teasing her damp female flesh. She looped her arms around his neck and curled her legs tight about his hips, needing him in a way that went far beyond the physical.
This time, he took her fast and hard, pulling her hips down to meet his hammering upward thrusts…over and over until she was gasping into the crushing force of his mouth and clinging to him, her fingers wrapped tight in his hair. His passionate assault was wild and relentless. Splaying his hands low on her back, he arched her more fully onto him and ground his body full force against hers, creating an exquisite friction that made her tremble.
The stormy tempest broke on a wave of pleasure so intense she wrenched her mouth away and cried out his name. And as she came with a glorious, shuddering climax that beckoned his release, her heart admitted what her mind wasn’t yet prepared to accept.
She’d fallen in love with him, too.