The death of someone you care about can suck the life out of you.

It did me.

At least for a while.

In the two weeks following Tanner’s death, I moped. Other than working my shifts at Clyde’s, I stayed in my pajamas and sulked around my aunt Kassi’s. The worst part is that all my brooding wasn’t even for Tanner. Most of it was over losing Tucker. I’m aware how shitty that makes me seem, but in my heart, Tanner was gone long before he was gone.

It wasn’t until I got the call from Darcy that my application for the apartment was approved that I officially started to move on with life and began fulfilling the promise I made Tucker: be happy. I moved out of Kassi’s the next week, put in my notice at Clyde’s, and demanded Gary hire me because his son broke my heart.

I did all this because I finally realized the path I wanted to take in life. Pretending to be Tucker’s manager for those few appointments and helping him achieve his dreams of getting signed made me discover that I loved the business side of the music industry.

I’ve been talking with Rae, Perry, and even Gary over the last several weeks about some sort of collaboration. I think that with Rae’s marketing experience, Perry’s graphic work, and Gary’s history in the industry, we can get an amazing thing going.

Finding my love for the music industry wasn’t the only thing Tucker helped with. I guess whatever Tucker said to my father was what he needed to hear, because about a week after Tucker left, he contacted me. We’ve met for lunch once a week since. He’s been surprisingly supportive of me attempting to start my own business, but according to him, my mother hasn’t been too fond of it. But I’m not talking to her, so I don’t care much about what she has to say on the matter.

Since the business isn’t one hundred percent ready, I’m working at Mic’s, scouting the talent while all the final details get ironed out. I’ve officially become a part-time suit. Only I’m more of skirt. Or apron. But still, I’m working it while I’m working.

I’m doing it all on my own, and I’m happy.

For the most part.

I want Tucker here. Badly.

And in a few hours, he’ll be here. Like here here. He’s playing Mic’s tonight while the band he’s touring with does a local acoustic set.

“You freaking out yet?” Rae asks from the other side of the bar.

I set her drink down in front of her and shrug. “Not yet.”

“But don’t you want him to come back?”

“Trick question, Rae.” She crinkles her nose at me, so I explain. “There’s a huge part of me that hopes he’s back for me. But there is an equally big part that wants him to have all the success in the world. He can’t do that while he’s here.”

Rae lets out a low whistle. “Damn, girl. You’ve got it baaaaad.”

Pinning her with a serious stare, I say, “I do.” Grabbing a bottle of rum, I start making the drink requested by Gaige, who is lounging in the group’s usual spot. “But I don’t think he has any idea I’m working here, so I’m sure he’s not planning on seeing me. This means I have nothing to freak out over.”

“We just gonna play it cool?”

“We are.”

“Done. Playin’ it cool. Just gonna play it cool.”

I set down Gaige’s drink a little too hard and give her a sharp stare. “Spit out whatever it is you want to say.”

“Fine, but only because you asked so nicely.” She smirks over the rim of her glass and takes a sip of her drink. “You two made that promise, right? That one day when you knew you’d let each other know and find a way to make it work. Well, you know. And you need to tell Tucker that. If you’re ready, you need to tell him.”

I don’t say anything and instead take a drink order from the customer that just walked up to the bar.

We did make that promise, and I am ready. I miss Tucker way more than I’m willing to admit out loud half the time.

I meant what I said to Rae. I want him to have this adventure. I want him to make his music. But I also want him here.

I guess I just need to give him a chance to make that decision himself.

Handing the customer his drink, I turn to Rae. “Fine. I do need to tell him. If I see him tonight, I promise I’ll talk to him.”

“Fine. I’ll take it. It’s better than nothing.”

“Good. Now go take Gaige his drink, please. I’ll be over during my break.”

Gary appears out of nowhere.

“Do you really think I’d make you work tonight? Get your skinny ass out from behind my bar,” he says in that gruff voice of his.

I put my hands on my hips and brace myself for an argument for him. “Come on, Gary. That’s not fair to everyone else.”

“Would it make you feel any better if I said I wasn’t working tonight either?”

“I’m not going to win, am I?”

Gary gives a short laugh. “You mean I’m not going to let you hide behind the bar all night? No.”

I relax my stance and drop my shoulders in defeat because he called that. I did want to hide tonight. I’ll keep my promise to Rae regarding Tucker, but that doesn’t mean that I’m going to go out of my way to find him and talk to him.

“You suck, Gary,” I tell him half-jokingly.

“I’ve been told that time or two. Now go. Don’t make me fire you.”

“I knew I liked you, Gary,” Rae beams.

Pulling off my apron, I shoot her a dirty look. After refilling my soda, I walk with Rae over to our group table.

“Here, lazy ass,” she says, handing Gaige his drink and taking a seat next to Hudson.

“Can’t believe we scored VIP seats for the show. I fucking love Drive. And Tucker is okay too.”

“Of course we did,” Gaige says. “Ever since Rae and Maura left Clyde’s, all we’ve done is hang out here. I think we keep Gary afloat most days. We deserve this spot.”

“Truth,” Perry agrees.

“Tucker hooked us up with these seats, not Gary, you nuts,” Hudson tells them. “My boy does me good.” We all immediately start laughing, minds going directly to the gutter. Hudson blushes when it catches up to him what he just said. “Fuckers.”

Rae shakes her head at her boyfriend. “I can’t believe Joey has you as a father. Poor kid.”

Hudson mumbles about “just saying yes,” and Rae swats at his arm. I mentally make a note to corner her about that later, because it seems like she’s holding back vital info about her life.

“Have you guys heard him on the radio yet?” Rae asks. “He sounds awesome.”

Gaige leans back in his chair and scoffs. “I had to hear that bastard for months in our apartment. I’m all Tuckered out.” He laughs loudly and slaps the table. “Get it? Tuckered?”

Hudson looks over at Rae and asks, “Who invited him?”

“Whatever. Tucker always appreciated my shitty jokes. You guys just need to be more like him.”

“Off driving all across the country, singing sad poetic songs to throngs of beautiful women who probably throw themselves at him at every show? Sign me up!” Perry spouts off, not thinking of what he just said.

“Perry!” Rae hisses. “Sorry, Maura. I’m sure he didn’t mean it like that.”

I wave her off. “It’s fine, Rae. Promise. I’m going to go check and make sure Gary doesn’t need any help before I officially clock out.”

Not waiting for a response, I rush off toward the back room, a little upset by what Perry just said. I don’t actually need to check with Gary about anything. Instead, I stand in the back hallway to collect myself because suddenly there are tears stinging my eyes.

What if Perry is right? I’ve spent this entire time Tucker was gone thinking of him as mine. What I never considered was all the women on the road or who was warming his bed at night. What if he doesn’t even want me anymore? What if I’m suddenly not enough? What if he’s realized he’s better off without me on the road?

“I swear I can hear you thinking in here,” Gary says, making me jump slightly. I walk the short distance to his office, hovering in his doorway. “You that worried about seeing him again?”

I nod. “I’m worried everything is going to be different.”

“Well, I sure as hell hope it is,” he says honestly. “Things were shit before and you know it. You two did nothing but tiptoe around Tanner or the idea of him. I’d hope that in your time apart you’ve both found who you are outside of all that bullshit. Hell, I know that just in the last two months you’ve been working here I’ve seen one hell of a difference in you. You’ve grown, kid. And I know my son is still going to love the person you grew into.”

I breathe a sigh of relief. “You know, for someone who hasn’t been a father that long, you’re awesome at it.”

Gary gives me a crooked smile that reminds me so much of Tucker’s and leans back in his chair, folding his hands across his stomach. “Honey, I basically raised musicians on the road for twenty-something years. I’ve got this shit in the bag.”

Just then, the back door opens and my eyes go wide because I know it’s the band coming in.

“Go on,” Gary says, jerking his head toward the main building. “Go lean on your friends. But remember what I said.”

Thank you, I mouth and dart down the hall back to the safety of my friends. I’m staring at the ground and not paying attention to where I’m going, and, of course, run into a rock-hard body. Big hands reach out to grab me before I start falling backwards. I immediately recognize the scent belonging to whomever I collided with.

I look up at the man who has coffee-brown eyes, lazily styled dark chocolate hair, and two sweet dimples tucked into the huge grin he’s sporting.

“There’s my girl,” my new roommate Dallas says.

Dallas, or Dall as I sometimes call him, came into my life about a week after I moved into my new apartment. I was working one night at Clyde’s and talking with another waitress about possibly wanting a roommate while Dallas was sitting at the bar. He overheard us and approached me before he left. After he reassured me that he wasn’t a total creeper or a crazy stalker and wouldn’t try to feel me up in my sleep since I didn’t have a penis, we set up a date for him to come check the place out. It didn’t take us long to discover that we had a very easy chemistry. He moved in that very same day.

Over the past few months, Dall has been there for me. He’s held me when I’ve cried at night and threatened to kick my ass when I was acting like a total bitch for no reason. The friendship we’ve formed has been fast and easy and real. We work well together, and I’m so glad he decided to listen in on my conversation.

“He’s here,” I whisper.

Dall’s eyes immediately dart behind me, and his eyes fall into slits as Gary walks out of his office toward the now open door. Saying that Dallas doesn’t like Tucker would be an understatement. I’ve told him several times that our split was mutual, but he doesn’t seem to want to believe that. He blames Tucker for all my tears, and he’d be mostly right. No matter how Dallas feels about Tucker, I know once he and Tucker meet, they’ll be fast friends.

He tucks me into his large frame and protectively ushers me to our table. “Come on, baby girl. We’ll let him come to us.”