I let out a slow breath and tapped my brother’s name. There was no going back now. Even if he didn’t answer, he’d see that I called.

“Cai? Is everything okay?” Jax’s voice was more worried than I’d ever heard him. Even when he called about Grandfather, his voice had been flat, controlled.

“I’m fine,” I said, sitting down in my favorite chair. It was an old thing I’d found at a garage sale, but it was far more comfortable than the most expensive piece of furniture I’d had growing up.

“Not that I’m not glad to hear from you,” he said, “but you must admit, it’s not exactly a normal thing. I mean, the last time you called, you were in Texas dealing with some epidemic.”

I took the route he offered. “I’m back in Atlanta now, with my whole team. The treatment I came up with knocked the infection out, and we were able to locate the source and contain it. I don’t know if I thanked you for helping to get my mind off things for a while but thank you.”

“Are you sure you’re okay?” he asked.

“I saw Slade.”

Silence.

“How is he?” Jax’s voice was strangely soft when he finally asked. “I’ve been wanting to call him and Blake to tell them about Syll, but I didn’t know how they’d take it. I don’t want any of you to think I’m reaching out because of Grandfather’s ultimatum and what it means for my position at the company.”

“Aren’t you?” I was honestly curious.

“Are you?” he countered. “You’ve called me twice since you left Boston.”

“You know I’m not interested in being a part of Hunter Enterprises. And I don’t need Grandfather’s money.” I picked at a loose thread. “He should have just let you have it all. You’re the one who followed in his footsteps.”

I let my words sit as I waited for a response. I hadn’t flat-out told him that I’d called because I wanted to address what was between us, but I knew him well enough to know he now understood that I was trying.

“I always admired you, Cai,” he said finally. “You excelled at everything. School. Sports. You could’ve stepped up into Hunter Enterprises at any time and left me in the dust. But you knew what you wanted to do, and you didn’t let anyone stop you.”

I sat in stunned silence. He admired me?

“Grandfather was proud of you,” he continued. “I know he wasn’t the sort of man who talked about his feelings, but he bragged about you, all of you guys actually. Every event we hosted or attended, he’d find a way to bring up his successful grandsons. He loved telling people how you worked at the CDC, how you’d gotten there all on your own. Never asked him for help or to make a call.”

“I never knew,” I said softly. “I always thought he held it against me that I hadn’t wanted to join you in the family business. That I’d done what Dad had done and went off to do my own thing.”

“The night he…that night, he was with Ms. K, and I hadn’t even realized he wasn’t in the house. The two of us had lived under the same roof for years, and we rarely spoke outside of work. We never talked about anything that was really important.”

Was Jax really saying that his conversations with Grandfather about work weren’t important? It didn’t seem possible. Hunter Enterprises meant so much to him.

Before the accident, he’d talked about being a professional golfer or a fireman – the usual dreams children had – but not long after the accident, he’d told our grandparents that he wanted to work at Hunter Enterprises. From that moment, he hadn’t faltered.

“Jax, did you really want to run the company?”

He gave a small laugh. “I think you’re the first person to ask me that. From the moment I walked into the dining room and announced to Grandfather and Grandma Olive that I wanted to work at Hunter Enterprises, everyone took it as how things would be. No one thought to ask if I’d been in the right frame of mind, or even old enough to understand what I was saying. And no one ever asked if I’d changed my mind.”

“You’d sounded so sure,” I said. “And you made Grandfather so happy.”

“He did what he thought was best at the time,” Jax said. “But in the end, even he knew that he could have done better.”

“I was never able to measure up,” I admitted. “You were doing everything Grandfather had wanted from Dad, doing odd jobs at the company by the time you were twelve. Everyone loved you.”

“Cai,” Jax began.

I didn’t let him continue. I needed to get this out now, or I’d never say it. “I pushed myself because I thought if I could somehow show that I was as good as you, Grandfather would see me too.”

“Shit, Cai, I didn’t know.”

“No one did,” I said. “When I first heard those stipulations, all I could think was that it was just Grandfather trying to control us after all, force us into being just like you.”

Jax laughed. “My first thought was confusion. I was so full of myself that I couldn’t imagine what Grandfather had meant. We’d just grown apart like siblings do.”

I’d made the call, and I was going to take the initiative. “I’m not doing this because of Grandfather’s will, but I’d like to see if we can…” I searched for the words.

“Be brothers again?”

I swallowed around a sudden lump in my throat. “Yes. I’d like that.”

After a moment, Jax cleared his throat. “How’s your colleague?”

I appreciated the change of subject – that was enough talking about our emotions for today – and followed. “Addison is great.”

“Addison?”

I ignored the question. “How’s Syll?”

“She’s great. You should come back soon so you can meet her before the wedding.”

“You’re rushing into things, aren’t you?” I asked. “You’ve only known her for a month. An engagement is one thing. Getting married that fast is something else.”

“We’re thinking next year,” Jax said. “But what are the chances you’ll be back before then?”

He had a point. Before Grandfather’s death, it’d been three years since I’d visited. As I talked to my brother, however, I couldn’t imagine not seeing him for another three years.

For the first time since I’d moved to Atlanta, Boston was too far away.

“I’ll plan something soon,” I said.

“Maybe you can bring your colleague, Addison.”

I could hear the smirk in his voice. “It’s not like that.”

“Oh, really? What’s it like then?”

“She’s my intern, and we spend a lot of time together. We’re friends.” All of that was true. Just not the whole truth.

“Do you remember that day at the cemetery when I told you guys about Syll and the club? How I didn’t want to talk about her?”

I made a noise of affirmation, not liking the direction this conversation was taking.

“Syll turned my entire world upside-down,” Jax said without a trace of embarrassment or sarcasm. “She made me see that I could tell myself how fulfilling my work was, and even mean it, but without family, it would never make me happy. She made me see myself in a way no one else ever had.”

“I’m happy for you.” The words fell flat, but not because I didn’t think Jax deserved to be happy. Rather, I kept thinking about how I’d opened up to Addison more than I had anyone else in my life.

“I’m not going to pry,” Jax said. “But I will say this: if she makes you want to be a better man, and she gives you what you need to accomplish that, don’t let her go.”

We made a little more small talk before ending the call, both of us promising that we would talk again soon. And it wasn’t just something to say. We both meant it.

I stayed in the chair after we’d said goodbye, thinking about everything we’d said, and everything we had left to say. I’d had an idea in the back of my mind ever since I’d talked to Jax while I was in Texas. An idea that was now starting to feel more like something I needed to do.

If Jax and I were really going to mend things between us, and do it right, we couldn’t do it over the phone or in weekend visits. I’d left Jax before, forcing him to carry a burden I hadn’t realized he’d had. He couldn’t come to me, but I could go to him.

The CDC had a branch in Boston, and Dr. Fenster had connections there.

If this had happened right after the funeral, I would’ve applied for a transfer without a second thought, because all I’d had here was work.

But now, I had Addison, and I wasn’t sure I could leave her.