New Year’s Eve

Sasha and I got to work extra early today. She and Jordan usually do a lot of the prep work themselves, but Noah is proposing to his girlfriend today. It must be epic because he recruited a bunch of help.

Jordan laughed when I practically swooned over how romantic Noah is for going to such great lengths to win Mel’s heart. If he thinks that’s bad, he definitely doesn’t want to see me curled up on his couch with his cat watching a chick flick.

“You are so distracted today. What gives?” Sasha hands me a bottle of gin to shelve. As soon as she got back into town yesterday, she crashed.

“Nothing. Sorry.”

She eyes me suspiciously but changes the subject. “Well, fill me in on Christmas with the Westons. How did it go?”

Even thinking about Christmas has heat rushing to my cheeks for many reasons.

“Allie … did you and J fuck?”

“What? No!”

“Then why did you go from pale to lobster in three seconds flat? Did he get you off again?”

Why did I tell her about that night?

“Sasha, stop. Nothing happened. Well, we might have kissed, but honestly, I was drunk and embarrassed myself more than anything. I’m surprised Jordan doesn’t laugh whenever he looks at me.”

She stops unpacking the box of alcohol on the counter and turns to me. “What did you do?”

“I told him about Evan.”

She furrows her brow. “I’m confused. I thought he already knew about Evan. Isn’t that how you two got into the compromising position in the first place?”

“No, I told him why I left Evan. About the lack of … well, you know.”

Sasha doubles over in laughter. “You must have been drunk, and I have to say I’m a bit disappointed in my boy. You told him Evan lacked in the big O department and he didn’t make it his mission to give you as many as he could? Jordan is losing his touch in his old age.”

As I wash my hands, I think back to that night. “I think he would have because the kiss he planted on me was … wow. But I also told him about my six-month rule. I think he was trying to honor that. He did say something, and I wasn’t sure how to take it.”

“What did he say?”

“Something like, he should try that with Ty. Give himself six months to figure out what they are or aren’t. I don’t know, Sasha. This whole thing is way more complicated than I want.”

She clicks her tongue at me and goes back to the box. “You like him; it’s not that complicated.”

“He’s my boss, and he’s obviously in love with Tyler. I’m not looking to be in a love triangle, and even though it doesn’t bother me in the slightest that J is bi, I definitely don’t have the right equipment to compete with Ty, even if I wanted to.”

Sasha completely stops what she’s doing and hops up on the bar and sits, patting the spot next to her for me to join her. “I’m going to tell you this because I realize it can be a complicated discussion to have with anyone. Since I’m Jordan’s best friend, I know this answer inside and out because we’ve talked about it many times.”

“Why do I have a feeling I’m about to be schooled?”

“Because you are. Look, Jordan is a sexual person. He has been as long as I’ve known him. The thing about J is, he keeps his feelings on lock. If you ever hear him say, ‘It’s just sex,’ that’s because to him, it is. Maybe his casual encounters are a bit more mood-driven as far as guy or girl, but that’s the extent of it. When it comes to relationships, the closest he’s ever been to one is Tyler.”

“Great.” I hop off the bar to get back to work.

“Stop, Allie, and listen to me.” Sasha’s tone leaves no room for argument. I turn back toward her, and she nods. “Better. I don’t want you to hang your hopes on Jordan because, like I told you in the beginning, he’s dark and has more baggage than a loaded 747. But I’m not your father, and I’m not going to tell you what to do. The fact he’s setting boundaries with you, getting to know you, and kissing you, says more than you can begin to understand.”

“Why kissing?”

She squeezes my hand. “Because Jordan has intimacy issues that are wrapped around a bundle of trust issues. When he tells you his past, you’ll understand. He avoids kissing at all costs. That’s not to say he doesn’t ever do it, but his lips are usually reserved for Ty, and now, you.”

I’m not sure why, but her words hit me low in my gut. “What does that even mean?”

Sasha smiles. “I’m not exactly sure, but you guys will figure it out. Please just keep in mind that Jordan may not come across like it, but he’s fragile in more ways than most people.”

Jordan, Sawyer, and Mac walk into the bar, cutting our conversation short.

“Ladies, how is your day going?” Sawyer slides onto a barstool and flashes one of the sexiest grins I’ve ever seen. No wonder Sasha gets in his pants when he’s in town.

“Better now that you’re here, sexy.” Sasha already has two beers open for them, and I make a mental note of what kind for later.

“You always know just what I like.”

Jordan holds up a hand as Mac laughs. “Stop it, you two. I’m serious, not tonight. It’s the bar’s biggest night of the year, and I can’t afford to lose my soon-to-be bar manager for the five minutes it will take to get your rocks off in my office.”

“Fifteen,” Sawyer corrects as Sasha squeals and wraps her arms around J.

“Are you serious? You’re going to give me an official title even though I’ve done the work for years?”

“And a raise, but not until summer. I have a few things I have to work out first. If you still want the job then, it’s yours.”

She leans in and kisses his cheek. “Of course, I want it, and once you realize how well I do at manager, you’re going to want me to become a co-owner one day. I just know it.”

Jordan’s eyes grow wide, and Sawyer laughs at the two of them. “Since I won’t be the official owner for years to come, I’m not sure that will ever happen.”

That’s when I see the similarities between the brothers for the first time. Sawyer’s eyes narrow into slits. “You are the only owner, J, and you know it. If Noah and I had our way, we’d rip up that stupid loan contract in a second.”

Jordan storms off, and Sawyer starts texting on his phone. Sasha ignores the blowup and starts chatting with Mac. Stepping away to check on J, I find his office door half open and peek my head inside.

“Are you okay?”

His expression softens. “I’m fine. Come on in and have a seat.”

“I don’t want to intrude. That just seemed intense, and well … here I am.”

“Here you are, indeed,” he says with a smile, and I finally take a seat.

“So, uh, any resolutions tonight?”

His lascivious gaze rakes over me, making me wet between the thighs. Why does he affect me this way?

“To finally make a go of this thing with Tyler or end it altogether.”

His words do not even begin to match his expression, and it throws me. “Oh, well that’s good. I hope things work out for you, Jordan.”

“They will, one way or the other,” he answers without taking his eyes off of me.

Standing abruptly, he motions to the cabinet behind me. “Can you hand me the shirt on the top shelf? I can’t expect you guys to wear your shirts if I don’t wear mine.”

We don’t have to wear a uniform, but on big nights, Jordan has us all wearing shirts with the bar name and logo. V-necks for the girls, unless they’re morally opposed, and regular for the guys. Sasha cut her V even lower; she says it’s great for tips, but she’s also an attention whore.

“Yeah, sure.” I walk over to the cabinet, and when I turn around, J is right behind me, shirtless, and I’m sure it’s payback from when I changed in front of him at Christmas.

“Like what you see?”

The glimmer in his eyes fades when he sees the worried look on my face. I reach for his left side by his ribs and caress his scar. How did I not see this at Christmas?

“What happened?” The scar isn’t big, but it’s noticeable enough that I know whatever happened was painful.

He reaches for my fingers and squeezes them gently before pulling them away. “Gunshot.” Then he tosses his shirt on and sits back down behind his desk.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to pry or step out of line. I should get back to work.”

“Allie, wait …” He runs his hand through his hair and exhales. “It’s a touchy subject and not something I like to think about, but I’ll tell you about it one day. In the meantime, you should know Tyler will be here tonight.”

I’m still stuck on the gunshot thing. “Okay, not a problem.”

“One more thing before you go.” I pause at the door, and he continues. “What are your resolutions?”

With a shrug, I flash him a fake smile. “Watch more chick flicks with a big fat cat.”

Jordan laughs, and I make my exit and get back to work.

By eleven thirty, the bar is standing room only. There’s a section of the bar that’s blocked off by three massive bodyguards surrounding Sawyer, Darren, Darren’s girlfriend Belle, their sister Rory, Tyler, and Rory’s date for the night, Eli Watts.

I’m not star struck very often, but seeing Eli up close reminds my inner teenage girl she’s alive and well. Eli used to be in one of the biggest boy bands of all time. He’s a blond-haired, blue-eyed god, and from the way he looks at Rory, he’s also off the market.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see Darren flagging me down. By the time I make my way to them, Tyler is noticeably absent. “I have a question for you,” he says.

I lean in close so I can hear him better. There’s a live band tonight, so it’s louder than normal. “Well, I might have an answer for you if you ask nicely.”

“I knew I liked you for a reason,” Belle says as Darren wraps his arm around her. They’re adorably cute together, and that baby bump she’s sporting makes them even cuter.

“It seemed like you and J were cozy at Christmas. If that’s the case, why are we sitting here with Ty tonight?”

Oh hell … these are his friends; I’m not getting in the middle of this.

“J and I are just friends.”

Darren’s gaze locks on mine. “Bullshit. Try again.”

I look to Belle for help, but she shrugs. “Sorry, I’m totally curious too. J couldn’t keep his hands off you last week. What gives?”

“I just got out of a six-year relationship; I’m not looking to rebound with anyone. Besides, Jordan and Ty have a good thing … I think.”

“He and Ty have a thing, but it’s not necessarily good,” Darren corrects.

“Well, I wouldn’t know because we’re still getting to know each other. There’s also the issue of him being my boss. That’s just asking for trouble.”

Belle’s beaming like only a woman in love can. “Mel works for Noah and the band and look how well that turned out. And I work with them on some articles and look at us.”

“Nice try. Can I get you guys anything before I go? Jordan is going to jump my shit if I stay here talking to you much longer.”

Speaking of …

“Come on, Allie!” he barks from across the bar. “We’re getting slammed over here. Start delivering these drinks!”

“Sorry, girl, get back to it. If Ty dishes any details in your favor, I’ll share them.”

“Thanks, Belle, but it’s not that serious. Really. We’re just friends.”

By the time I make my way down to Jordan, my anger flares. He doesn’t need to yell at me when I’m tending to his friends.

“About time,” he snaps. “Sasha already took your drinks. I need you to go in the back and tell Paul to come refill all the cherries and olives and shit. He can’t hear me when I call back there.”

Not wanting to spend any more time in his proximity, I make my way to the back and can’t find Paul anywhere. There is no way I’m going back out there empty handed, so I pull the stepstool over to the shelf on the back wall where I know the cherries live.

I’ve just about got them in my hand when the door slams open. Losing my footing, I come down hard on my ankle.

“Jesus, Allie! Are you okay?”

Jordan crouches beside me in an instant, and a dam of tears bursts open because I’m so over this night. And maybe because my ankle is throbbing too. “I’m fine,” I sputter and try to push him away, but he won’t have it.

“Let me help you up.”

As soon as I put pressure on my foot, I know I’m in trouble. “Shit!”

Jordan scoops me into his arms and walks me to the nearby desk. “I’m going to take off your shoe and take a look.”

My foot feels better once the shoe is off, but the way he shakes his head tells me I’m in trouble. Looking down, I can already see the redness and bruising. “This is not the way I wanted to start the new year.”

With an exhausted sigh, he pulls up a chair and sits but continues to elevate my leg. “Me either. Why were you up there?”

“Because I didn’t want you screaming at me again. Your friends were giving me the third degree about us, not the other way around. I was just trying to get back to work. When I couldn’t find Paul, I didn’t want to be on the receiving end of your rage again, so I thought I’d at least bring back some cherries. I would’ve been fine if you hadn’t slammed into the room like a caveman.”

He reaches forward and wipes away a stray tear. “I’m sorry I’m stressed. It’s a big night, and you’re my best waitress. Well, you were. I don’t think it’s broken, but you’re going to need an X-ray to confirm.”

“It’s not broken. I’ve broken the other one ice skating. I’m just going to need ice and alcohol. Tomorrow, I’ll get it double-checked.”

“Well, you’re in the right place for alcohol,” he answers with a sullen tone.

“Good. I’m assuming my drinks are on the house tonight since I can’t drive myself home.”

“I’ll get Mac to take you. He owes me a favor or two.”

The twinkle in his eyes tells me more than I need to know. “You and Mac too? Should I start making a list?”

“It was a weekend fling. Nothing you need to worry your pretty little head about.” He slightly moves my foot, and I hiss.

“Look, Jordan, I don’t want to spend the night alone. Can you just prop me up with two barstools in a corner, give me some ice and a few drinks? Maybe some nachos so I don’t throw up? I’ll pop some ibuprofen, and whoever leaves first can take me home.”

“You got it. I’ll make sure you’re taken care of tonight. I promise.” Jordan scoops me into his arms and carries me back to the bar where Sawyer and Darren quickly arrange their stools against the wall in the corner where no one can bump into me.

Within minutes, I’ve got my leg in a box with a hole cut out, padded with towels and surrounded by bags of ice. It’s actually pretty comfortable considering the situation.

Sasha places a plate of nachos in front of me. “Poor Allie. I can’t believe Jordan made you fall.”

Jordan flinches and hands me a vodka tonic.

“It wasn’t his fault. It was an accident,” I reply, graciously accepting the drink.

Darren reaches over and snags one of my chips. “You sure you don’t want us to take you to the hospital?”

“I’d rather not be in the ER tonight when I can go to the urgent care and get an X-ray tomorrow. It’s just a sprain.”

Tyler walks over with two extra chairs to replace the ones I’m now occupying. “Here you guys go. I can take you later if you want to go. Jordan is going to be here cleaning up until the wee hours of the morning.”

Why does he have to be so nice?

“Thanks, but I’m really okay. Jordan and Sasha, please stop hovering and get back to work. You’re down your best waitress, remember? You can’t afford to be slacking off.”

Sasha bumps hips with J. “You told her she’s your best waitress, huh? Was that before or after she fell?”

“Shut up and get back to work, Sasha,” he mutters and walks away.

“I’m going to go down there and keep him company,” Tyler announces.

“Like we care,” Darren mumbles under his breath.

Sawyer and Belle snicker, and I suddenly feel like I’m part of a mean clique in high school. “He seems nice. Why don’t you guys like him?”

Belle holds up her arms in a surrendering pose. “I don’t know him at all. I’m just laughing at these two goofs.”

Sawyer leans closer to me. “Because my brother deserves someone who makes him feel wanted. Someone who will run after him when he decides he’s not worthy of love. He needs someone who, instead of giving him space when he withdraws, will remind him it’s better for him to be here with them, in the moment. Tyler’s not that person. He appears for a few months and then disappears for a few months. Nothing has changed between them in ten years.”

“Oh …”

Darren leans in on my other side. “Yeah, oh. Not only that, but in those ten years, Jordan has never brought Tyler home for a holiday. In fact, that’s usually their downtime.”

“What do you guys want me to say?”

Sasha drops off another drink as Sawyer asks the big question. “Do you like him?”

“Even if I did, his mind is elsewhere, and he’s still my boss.”

“Fucking the boss is hot. Talk about spicing up a romance.” Belle fans herself, and I can’t help but laugh at her.

Sawyer nudges my arm. “I think you like him, and I think he likes you. And I already know I like you better than Tyler. So what’s stopping you?”

Suddenly, the bar erupts into a ten-second countdown to the new year. As couples all around us begin getting closer and kissing as the clock strikes twelve, Sawyer and I watch from our corner as Tyler and Jordan kiss in the new year. When the cheers finally die down a bit, I turn back to him.

“That’s what’s stopping me. I won’t come between that kind of love; I’m just not that kind of woman.”

Sawyer nods and clinks his glass against mine in a toast. “The two of us have a lot in common. You see, Allie, I’m not that kind of man either. That’s why I’m here tonight instead of where I’d rather be. Fucking sucks to be on the right side of karma, doesn’t it?”

He can say that again.