Kattlyn

 

I watched with envy every time one of my brothers found his mate. I wasn’t jealous, well maybe a little, but I was happy they’d each found their other half. I was also jealous of the relationships themselves. The humans demanded that my brothers remain faithful, which they happily did. The love exchanged between mates could easily be seen by anyone, but it remained just out of my grasp.

No male would ever accept the same demand from an Azziarin female, and I refused anything less than pure devotion. For standard years, I watched my mother suffer from Father’s infidelities, and I vowed never to let that same fate befall me.

But even now, Father expected me to mate with Jussin. He was handsome enough, but my skin crawled every time he looked at me. I knew I was a means to an end, but what end, I didn’t know. Jussin was calculating and smart, and maybe a little dangerous. He clung to tradition, the same one I continuously fought against and tried to change.

Love and companionship, that’s what I want. Was that wrong? The humans were quickly changing the way of life here, and I was ready to jump on board and embrace their ways as mine.

Waking to a brand-new day, sunlight filled the room. I knew Sydney and the others would be outside in the garden letting the kids play, so I threw the covers from my legs, hopped out of bed, slid on a blue sundress, slipped on some sandals, and headed out.

Watching the kids run around while I talked with the others was my favorite time of day. I loved to hear the laughter from the little ones as they ran off their energy. Almost at the front doors, I rounded the corner and nearly crashed into Father. Startled, my hand flew to my chest. “Sorry.”

“Kattlyn, I was just coming to find you.”

His smiling face made me nervous. Nothing good ever came from that much happiness. “King,” I said politely and inclined my head.

His smile faded to a frown. “How many times have I told you not to call me that?”

My lips quirked until I controlled it. He had told me many times, but I really enjoyed upsetting him, especially after Mother passed, and now with the forced mating . . .

Not wanting to push my luck, I inclined my head again and offered apologies. “Sorry, Father.”

He waved my apology away. “I have invited Jussin over for third meal and I expect you to be there dressed in your finest garments.”

I felt a flash of anger before I tamped it down and schooled my features. Although I love wearing nice garments, I certainly didn’t want Jussin to assume I was trying to impress him. I’d rather show up wearing a brown sack and have ratty hair. Now that would make a lasting impression.

Not able to say any of that, I bowed slightly and said, “Very well.” When it came to Father, I had to pick which battle to fight, and sharing a meal with my family plus one was not the time.

“Good. I’ll see you later in the dining hall.”

Now irritated, I stalked to the garden where Chloe and Sydney sat on the bench watching the kids.

Sydney’s eyebrows pulled close when she spotted me heading their way. “What’s wrong with you?”

“Nothing. Why?”

“I don’t believe that for a minute. You should see the look on your face.”

I plopped down on the ground and watched the kids play on the grassy field. Their laughter lightened my mood a little. But only a little. Finally, I huffed out a breath and said, “I was just ordered to be at third meal.”

“Yep”—Sydney’s face twisted with disdain— “we were also told we needed to attend.”

I should have known that they would be there. Still, I asked, “Jakke and Dazz?”

Chloe’s eyes shifted between the two of us. A long sigh escaped. “I hate ‘official’ family meals,” she said, making air quotations with her fingers.

“Me too.” Sydney looked down at me and asked, “Do you know what it’s about?”

I grabbed a clump of grass, something I did when bothered or nervous. “Father invited Jussin and ordered me to attend. I must wear my finest dress.”

“You don’t like him?”

“He’s nice enough I guess, but I . . . I . . .”

“You what?” Chloe leaned forward, resting her elbows on her knees.

“I want what you two have. Is that so wrong?” Shew, I said it. Hopefully they wouldn’t take it as envy or jealousy, because I wasn’t. Okay, maybe a little.

“No, it’s not.” Sydney glanced at the kids briefly. “Then don’t mate him.”

If only it were that simple. I scoffed at her comment and said, “I am not Human.”

“So?”

“Your customs are not ours, and I will not be given a choice.” I left out the part where I would disappear before being tethered to a loveless mating. One female of however many he wanted to take to his bed. No thanks. Not interested.

“Well, I for one am not looking forward to tonight.” Chloe stared off in the distance for a brief moment. “Right now, I envy the others.”

“The others?”

“Yes. None of the other brothers, or their mates, has to attend all these family meeting and gatherings.”

“Yeah,” Sydney said in a distant voice. “I guess that’s what we get for mating the two eldest.”

Chloe scoffed as she picked at her fingernails. “Lucky us.”

The standard hours flew by and before I knew it, I was standing in front of my closet searching for something to wear. It had to be decent enough, but not too flashy or extravagant. I pulled out a dress, looked it over, and said to no one in particular, “This one will do.”

Looking in the mirror, I ran my hands over the dress that fit perfectly. Blue in color with a black ribbon around the waist, the skirt cascaded to the floor. It was plain enough to get the point across. I didn’t bother fixing my hair. It fell in waves and landed mid-back.

One last glance in the mirror and I headed toward King Mallik’s private dining room. It was a little smaller and quainter than the main dining room and held only a few guests.

The delicious smell hit me long before I entered the room, making my stomach rumble. When I walked through the door, all eyes snapped in my direction. The others were standing behind their respective chairs. Apparently I was the last to arrive. Father stood at the head of the table, with Jakke then Sydney to his right, while Dazz and Chloe stood to his left. Jussin stood at the other end, leaving me to sit next to Chloe.

At a nod from King Mallik, everyone sat.

The males all made small talk with Jussin, and when he smiled at my family it was pleasant, but when he directed it at me it felt more like a smirk. Did he think he only needed to impress them and I would have no say? I may seem meek, but I will be in control of my destiny. He just didn’t know it yet, and neither did my father and brothers. To steal a line from Sydney, What an asshole!

They talked around me with their low conversation and polite chuckles. He told them what he had to offer, but no one ever really talked to me. Seriously! A few times I wondered why I was even there. I guess my opinion didn’t matter, not that I thought it would. I was just a means to an end.

The longer I sat there picking at my food, listening to the others, the angrier I got. No way would I be a part of this. I didn’t know how or when it would happen, but I refused to be a pawn in their game masked as tradition.

Father, Jakke, and Dazz asked Jussin the appropriate polite questions about his family, making sure he was good enough for the precious princess. I really tried to ignore them. It didn’t work.

“So tell me, Jussin, what do you have to offer my sister?” Jakke asked in his official eldest prince voice just before he took a sip of Fire’s Breath.

“My family owns several plots of land where we harvest crops for the market.”

“Many families harvest crops.”

“Yes, but we employ over fifty workers, and we also own an eatery at the market. I can promise you that Kattlyn will want for nothing.”

I snorted under my breath, I already wanted for nothing, at least nothing material. If he thought credits would sway me or my family, he had another think coming.

The more they talked about me, the more it ramped my irritation into a tailspin, and it took everything I had just to hold my tongue.

At one point in my life, I might have gone along with this archaic plan. Maybe. But not now. Not after the humans showed me a different way of life. A better way of life. Not able to stand any more of it, I gritted my teeth and reached over and grabbed Dazz’s mug of Fire’s Breath, tipped it back, and took a sip. The burn took my mind off the conversation. When I glanced up, I realized everyone sat in silence while staring at me.

“What?” I asked, not caring. Then I took another swallow. If the precious mates could drink this stuff then so could I.

Father lowered his utensils and glowered at me. “Put. That. Down.”

I paused before slowly setting Dazz’s mug back in front of him. The double standard stuck in my craw, and it was all I could do not to tell him just that.

Father sighed his disapproval. Jakke and Dazz stared at me, but the look on Jussin’s face was worth it all.

Disgust.

Maybe he would find me so repulsive that he backed out.

No such luck. They resumed their conversation as though nothing had happened.

The food tasted delicious but the company was lacking. Sydney kept shooting me pity looks while Chloe never even glanced my way.

When third meal ended, my father and brothers put their napkins on the table. A knowing gleam twinkled in Father’s eyes. I narrowed mine. What is he up to?

“Why don’t the two of you go for a walk? Get to know each other a little better.”

Daggers shot from my eyes before I plastered a fake smile on my face and turned to face Jussin. “Shall we?”

He inclined his head and then pushed up from the table. Formally addressing the males, he bowed slightly. “Thank you for the lovely meal.”

Turning around so he couldn’t see, I rolled my eyes as everyone played their part perfectly. Sydney grinned when she caught the eye roll.

With the politeness of an aristocrat, Jussin waved me out first. As we walked around the castle grounds, the air tasted thick, strained. It felt awkward and I desperately wanted to be anywhere but there with him. Not able to stand it any longer, I broke the ice, asking what I wanted to know. What I needed to know.

“Why would you want to mate someone who doesn’t want you?”

His eyes slid my way and he cocked his head slightly. “Honestly?”

“Yes. I don’t understand why you would tether yourself to a loveless mating.”

He laced his fingers behind his back and walked in silence. Not once had he tried anything with me. He didn’t even act like he wanted to be with me. Maybe he thought we would grow to love each other. We walked alone, so no one would be able to hear what he had to say, and Father would never believe anything I told him about Jussin. He expected I would say anything to get out of this.

“That is a fair question.” He glanced over his shoulder. “I am in love with Vanna, my consort, and she lives with me. When I take you for a mate”—he glanced at me with a stern look— “and I will . . . it will be to have young and secure my ties to the royal family. Nothing more.”

Gut punched, that’s how I felt, and it made me almost double over. Almost. Instead, I straightened my spine and tried to keep my breathing normal, lest I alert him to how much his words hurt. He wanted to use me as a tool, a means to an end.

Never!

He would never get near my body, let along fill it with young.

With a blank face and a high chin, I politely said, “Thank you for being honest with me.” And I meant it. We spent the rest of the walk in silence. A duty to perform, nothing more.

~~~~~

The next evening, all the females, along with a few of the mates, had gathered in the dining hall for a late-night snack. The Humans were always hungry, especially the ones who carried young. We were all sitting around talking when someone called out my brother’s name.

“Zekke!”

Everyone jumped to their feet. I didn’t even know he was heading home, but I was always happy when one of them returned safely. According to Sydney, Earth was dangerous. But then again, Zekke always enjoyed a good fight.

And then I spotted the light-haired female at his side. A little envious, I stopped in my tracks and glanced away. I heard the chitchat and felt terrible for not welcoming his mate to Azziar. And then . . .

And then . . .

He spoke.

The deep sound sparked a fire inside me.

On instinct, I sniffed . . .

Something clicked inside as he stepped forward and I got my first look at the male who belonged to that voice. The male who belonged to me.

Speechless, I stared breathlessly at him.My nostrils flared with every breath as I desperately fought the urge to run to him, to throw my arms around his neck. He smelled like exotic spices and all male. My core clenched tightly. I closed my eyes and tried to tamp it down. No use. I wanted him. Now. In every way. Without caring who was around.

Krista leaped into his arms and I trembled with anger. I had to make myself stay rooted to the spot as I fought the impulse to rip Krista from his arms. It wasn’t logical, I knew that. Krista was his sister. But that male, he was mine!

When he followed Krista and Kollin from the room, I had to lock my knees to keep from chasing him down. When they were out of sight, I collapsed into the chair and dropped my head into my palms. The amount of energy it took to stand in one spot—to watch him leave and do nothing . . . I tried to slow my breathing, calm my body down.  It wasn’t working.  My nerves felt tingly, electrifying. Is this how the others felt when the mating fever hit?

Sydney eased into the chair in front of me and grabbed a sweet treat from the plate. “What’s wrong with you?” She asked before she popped it into her mouth.

I slowly lifted my head, hoping Sydney wouldn’t see the turmoil on my face, hear my hammering heart. I felt like I’d just run one hundred laps around the castle grounds. Finally able to speak, I licked my dry lips and said casually, “Nothing, why?”

Sydney’s eyes widened and she smirked. Knowing her, she could see the struggle written all over my face. She said as much. “Well, that’s a lie. You should see yourself.”

I didn’t need to see myself. I already knew what a mess I was on the inside, so why would the outside be any different?

Ava sat quietly next to Zekke. Her eyes kept darting our way, but she remained silent and I felt like a horrible sister-in-law. Not wanting to make her feel more uncomfortable, I sat up straight, relaxed my shoulders, and gave her what I hoped looked like a welcoming smile.

“Where are my manners? Welcome to Azziar, mate of my brother.”

“Thanks.” She squinted her eyes and twisted her mouth. I think she looked worried? “Are you sure you’re okay?”

“Yes, I am well. Thank you.” Another polite, strained smile.

Lie. It easily rolled from my tongue. Even now, I had to fight back the urge to hunt him down. Alan. A grin played across my lips. His name is Alan.

I ignored the low murmurs, light laughter, pushed all the background noise away. Alan. His name is Alan. Dark hair and a strong jaw with an odd-looking shadow that covered his lower face. I hadn’t noticed that with the other Humans, so maybe it just happened with the males of their species. My body trembled just thinking about him, wanting to seek him out, but I pushed through the lust and focused on common sense. He needed time with his sister and I needed to get a handle on these out-of-control emotions before I hunted him down.