Eagle
Two Years Ago
THE COPPER PENNY Bar and Grill was always rife with willing pussy, and tonight was no exception. Obviously owned by the Dead Presidents MC, with our logo on the front of the building and a long line of motorcycles parked out front, the only women who dared entered were either ol’ ladies looking for their men, or unattached women looking to spread their legs for a military veteran turned biker.
Our club had a reputation with the ladies, and adventurous broads across Seattle made it their goal to see if that rep held true. They wanted dominating men who weren’t afraid to hold them down and fuck them, a desire I was all too willing to accommodate. There weren’t many things that made me feel alive anymore, but sex, at least, reminded me that I still had a pulse.
Besides, sometimes when I was fucking, I could close my eyes and remember what it was like to have Genie beneath me.
The Dead Presidents hadn’t patched me in as a member yet, but after two months as a prospect, I’d learned the ropes and had gotten to know most of the brothers. Luckily, the broads in this joint didn’t give two shits about which patches I had on my cut, as long as I donned that leather vest they all seemed to lose their minds over. And the fact that I was still new meat, only increased my demand.
Chicks were always willing to warm my bed. The trick, was getting them out of it after I was done.
As I rounded the corner of the bar, a blonde and a brunette sitting at a side booth caught my eye with finger waves and suggestive smiles. I was about to head over and see if I could strum up a threesome when two brothers pushed past me and joined the duo. The blonde cast me a disappointed look and I was tempted to walk over there and make shit awkward, but the last thing I needed was to piss off brothers before patching in. I was tired of doing grunt work and had no desire to be a prospect any longer than necessary.
Besides, like I said, the bar was full of willing pussy. I’d find more.
A curvy little brunette was sitting at the bar, watching me from beneath her eyelashes. She gave me a welcoming smile and patted the bar stool next to her. I took her up on the offer, checking her out as I approached. Medium brown hair, dark eyes, lips a little too thin for my liking, but she had one hell of a nice rack. The kind of plump, round tits I loved to fuck. Tits had always been my weakness.
“Hey, Eagle, the usual?” the bartender, another club prospect who went by the name of Brass, asked. Brass had gotten his road name from the brass knuckles he always carried. I’d never been a fan of the weapon or the man—only pussies needed to enhance their punches—but as a sniper, I couldn’t say shit. I’d spent the past ten years taking out marks who never even knew I existed. Lots of people would consider that cowardly as hell.
I’d saved a lot of lives as a sniper, but not the one that mattered most.
“Yep. Thanks, Brass,” I replied.
“Eagle, huh?” the brunette asked, her gaze taking in my tats, lingering on my arms. “You’re one of the new guys. I’ve heard about you.” Her smile was suggestive, indicating that she liked what she’d heard.
I shrugged. “Don’t go believing everything you hear, babe.” She did have a nice rack, and wearing a low-cut v-neck, she clearly wanted people to look. I got an eyeful before returning her smile. Brass served me a Jack Daniels, neat. I tossed it back and ordered another before returning my attention to the broad. “What’d you hear about me, anyway?”
“That you’re hung like a horse, you fuck like a wild animal, and…” she hesitated, taking a sip of her drink before continuing, “You’re an asshole.”
She probably expected me to deny it, but instead, I gave her another shrug. “On second thought, believe everything. That shit’s all true.”
“Good to know,” she said with a nod. She didn’t believe it. They never did. The more honest I was, the more they thought they could fix me or harness me or whatever. Like one taste of their pussy would have me tumbling head over heels in love. But that shit wasn’t possible since my heart never came home from Iraq. There was nothing left for these bitches but my body.
“I’m Mindy,” the brunette said, chewing on her straw while she watched me. “You wanna get out of here?” She leaned closer, rubbing her leg against mine. “Maybe go next door?”
Most members and prospects had rooms next door in the renovated old fire station that served as the club’s headquarters. The fact Mindy knew this told me this wasn’t her first rodeo, and I wasn’t her first bull. No doubt she’d saddled up and ridden her fair share of my brothers. Good. I wasn’t looking for some innocent virgin who’d get the wrong idea and expect to be more than just a fuck.
Brass set my second drink down. I gave him a nod and tossed it back before pushing away from the bar and offering Mindy my hand. She gulped down the last of her fruity, sweet-smelling drink and elbowed the redhead on the bar stool beside her. The redhead was making out with another prospect named Wasp. As they pulled apart, he gave me a chin lift.
“Hey, Eagle.” Wasp’s gaze drifted to Mindy and the corner of his mouth tugged up in a smirk. “Have fun.”
Wasp was a good guy, and one hell of a mechanic, but he didn’t take anything but bikes seriously. He was all smiles and jokes all the damn time. Well, when he didn’t have his tongue down some broad’s throat. I eyed the redhead he still had his arm wrapped around as she rubbed against him. Looked like I wasn’t the only one who’d be heading for the fire station soon. “Thanks brother, you too.”
The girls finished talking, and Mindy slid her small hand in mine and hopped down from the barstool. She had to be maybe five-three, a full foot shorter than me. Probably wouldn’t be able to kneel when she sucked my cock; she’d have to sit on the bed. That was the thought running through my mind as I led her next door.
As usual, a handful of brothers were hanging out in the common area, shooting pool and playing darts. A dark-haired club whore by the name of Kim was working on Sage, the club’s counselor, by the fire pole. As we approached, Kim unzipped Sage’s jeans and pulled out his dick, palming it before she slipped it past her lips.
“She’s such a slut,” Mindy muttered, sounding disgusted.
There was something else in Mindy’s eyes, though. Jealousy? Arousal? Determined to ferret it out, I replied, “Maybe, but she can suck cock like a fuckin’ pro.”
Kim deep throated Sage, gagging as she grabbed the backs of his thighs and forced him deeper. She pulled back, then did it again. The sight was hot as fuck, making my own cock spring to life. I tugged Mindy’s hand and came to a stop, settling her in front of me so we could both watch as I palmed her tits. She didn’t pull away.
Sage’s hand settled on the back of Kim’s head. Holding her where he wanted her, he thrust into her mouth. Several of the guys had gathered around and were watching now, and it looked like Kim would have a busy night. The club whores usually did. As our counselor, Sage claimed that sex was a critical part of recovery, helping fucked-up old servicemen find some measure of peace and release, if only for a little while. I didn’t know if I bought into that whole sexual healing shit, but while most of my brothers used sex to forget, I used it to remember.
“I’m better at sucking dick than she is,” Mindy said, leaning into my kneading hands. Her voice was deeper now, and her nipples pebbled against my hands. Felt like she wasn’t even wearing a bra.
“Oh yeah?” I asked, looking down at her. Those razor thin lips wouldn’t be nearly as pretty as Kim’s stretched around my cock, but they’d do. Especially if she knew how to work her tongue.
“Yes,” Mindy replied. “Way better.”
I gave her tits another squeeze. “Prove it.”
She looked around, taking in the guys watching Kim. I could tell the idea was turning her on, making her wet. Not only was she competitive, but she also had a kinky side. I could help her explore that. “Here?” she asked.
“You sound like you have something to prove, babe. I’m just giving you the platform if you want it. Suck me off here, or up in the room, I don’t care which. But down here, you can show us all how much better you are than Kim.” I rubbed my erection along her ass, letting her know how much the idea turned me on. “And I think you’ll get off on my brothers watching you, wishing their cocks were in your mouth. In your pussy.”
Her breath hitched. She was thinking about it.
“You like that idea, don’t you? You want them all to want you.”
I didn’t think she was going to do it, but Mindy surprised me when she turned and dropped to her knees, unbuckling my jeans and setting my cock free. Lining me up in front of her mouth, I realized I’d been wrong. The shorty could suck me off while on her knees. She gave me head right there in the common room, taking me into her mouth and putting on a show for my brothers. She moaned loudly and played with my balls like my package was the most amazing thing she’d ever had in her mouth.
There was no way she could deep throat me, but she gave it the old college try, and although she wasn’t as skilled as Kim, my dick didn’t complain. I fucked her mouth as my brothers watched, giving us all a healthy dose of that sexual therapy Sage insisted we needed. I let her take me to the edge of release before I pulled her to her feet and led her upstairs. Stripping her bare, I fucked her big tits to get my sensitivity under control, and then I turned her ass over and had her grip the headboard as I plowed into her from behind.
Just like every time I fucked, I closed my eyes and tried to slip into the past. Tried to imagine a different body under me, one with silky dark curls, a spattering of freckles, soft plump lips, intelligent green eyes. The memories evaded me, swirling around in my head like dust motes, refusing to form anything solid. Desperate, I tried to conjure up Genie’s smile.
Nothing solidified.
Memories of her used to torment me, but over the past several months those memories had been harder and harder grasp. Now I realized that true torment came not from remembering, but from forgetting.
It had only been four years. How could I forget the woman I loved? The woman I’d planned to marry.
Guilt and anger stabbed at me, making me feel like shit. Like the asshole I was.
Sage called it ‘survivor’s guilt,’ but that seemed like such an insignificant title for the way her death had so irrevocably changed me. There was no getting over it or moving forward. I was a different man now than I’d been four years ago, and there was no going back.
And now I couldn’t even remember the face of the woman who’d forever changed me. I’d have to bring out the box of photos again. I’d gladly torture myself to burn her image back into my memory.
“Yes!” Mindy shouted. She was still putting on a show. For who? Me? She didn’t need to try so hard. This was never about her. “Fuck me! Harder!”
Pissed at myself, at the memories I couldn’t force to return, I was all too willing to oblige. I plowed into her harder, faster, wishing I could fuck it all away. Wishing I could fuck myself back in time. Wishing I could fuck myself into the grave beside Genie.
“Oh God, I’m coming!”
Mindy’s voice anchored me to a world I no longer wanted. Anger burned within me. Needing an outlet for it, I fucked her through her orgasm and onto the next one. “Is this what you want?” I asked.
“Yes! Please, yes! Fuck me!”
She took everything I gave her. Her limp body made me miss the way Genie would fuck me back. The way she would arch her back, wrap her legs around me, and squeeze my dick inside her. The way she made damn sure she got hers. I clung to those memories, wishing for something other than the boring woman who was under me.
I fucked Mindy until my body was so spent it came in self-defense, forcing me to stop so I could catch my fucking breath and calm down my heart. Exhaustion left me feeling empty. Hollow.
Not even sex could bring back memories of Genie anymore.
Mindy was breathing heavily as she collapsed on her stomach beside me. Disgusted with her, with myself, with the world, I smacked her on the ass and said, “Time to go.”
She pushed up on her arms and stared at me. “What?”
We both needed a reality check. “I don’t care where you go, babe, but you can’t stay here.”
Her mouth dropped open in shock as hurt flooded her dark eyes.
Did she expect us to cuddle? Not going to happen. I needed her out of my bed, so I could finish off the bottle of Jack sitting on top of my mini-fridge and pray it was enough to knock me out. Pray it would keep away the nightmares of Genie’s exploding AAV. Why the hell could I remember every detail of the instantaneous explosion while the face I’d borderline worshiped for years was nothing but a blur? What was wrong with me?
Everything. As evidenced by the naked stranger in my bed.
“But… I sucked your dick. In front of everyone.”
Rolling out of bed to dispose of the condom, I nodded. “Sure did.” What did she want from me? A fucking trophy? She wasn’t even that great. Did she think I’d let her stay here? That she could fill the hole inside me? Without my memories, that hole was all I had left of Genie and no random cut slut was going to touch it.
I collected her clothes from the floor and tossed them to her. “You knew what this was before you came up here.” I wasn’t going to lead her on, and I didn’t want to hurt her, but she wasn’t moving and I needed her gone. Steeling myself against her pained expression, I said, “By the way, your oral skills need some work. Kim’s much better. Maybe you should ask her for a lesson? Or check in with the guys downstairs, I’m sure they’d be willing to give you some practice.”
Her nostrils flared, and she made a strangled noise, a cross between a growl and a sob. Her face turned red and blotchy and her eyes hardened. Good. Anger would take her out of here and make sure she never came back. Anger would save her from me.
She shook out her blouse and tugged it on while scooting out of the bed. “You really are an asshole, you know that?”
“I told you I was.”
“Well, forgive me for thinking you could at least be a decent human being.” She shoved her legs into her pants, hopping as she tugged them up.
What did she think the word ‘asshole’ meant? Pretty sure it wasn’t synonymous with ‘decent human being.’ I shrugged.
“You’re not that great either, you know?” she snapped. “I didn’t even come. And your dick’s not nearly as big as they say it is. You’re never getting into this pussy again.”
She stood there for a moment, glaring daggers at me. I don’t know what she was waiting for. Did she expect me to call her out on her lies? Or to apologize? Or to beg her to climb back into my bed? How big of an asshole did I have to be to make her leave?
“Noted,” I replied.
Her face only darkened. “Fuck you, Eagle!” She grabbed her shoes and stormed out of my room, slamming the door behind her.
Relieved she was finally gone, I marched straight for the fifth of whiskey sitting on top of the mini fridge and headed for my bed. Since I could no longer fuck to remember, I planned to drink to forget.