CHAPTER 17 – Grace
Sunlight stabbed through the treetops like giant golden arrows, giving this section of woodlands an ethereal glow. The familiar barking whistle of a Blue Jay pulled my gaze up into the almost empty canopy above, and I smiled. Their wistful freedom was as refreshing as the laughter of the children, who were running about the trees, the sound of their voices complementing this serene moment. Right here, in this pocket of untouched forest within the compound walls, we could pretend our world hadn’t been shattered by a pale ghost with a thirst for power. Normally, Talia and Connie, Liberty’s designated teachers, would take the children to the field, but we felt that had now been tarnished by Jebediah’s presence. The Arena, as the mad-man called it, was filled with imposing and clumsily structured seating overlooking our once tranquil field, now stained with blood. It was no place for children. At the same time, we wanted to protect the children from the madness and chaos by giving them something as simple as routine.
It was an unusually warm day, and the thin layer of snow had melted, leaving behind muddy slush that the kids couldn’t have cared less about. They were too busy enjoying some time outdoors to be concerned about the mess on their shoes. It was a moment of normalcy in what was a time of anything but normal.
Ink had been more pensive than usual over the last week. I wondered if he was having trouble reconciling with what had happened on the NIM run. He confessed his memory of it was hazy at best, that the drugs had blessedly stolen him away from those dreaded moments. He’d also made it adamantly clear he didn’t want to talk about it. I was grateful it wasn’t a memory he would be forced to relive, yet not knowing came with its own set of problems, it gave the mind more room to come to its own conclusions.
This morning Ink had gone to see Slink and his father, David. Today would be the day Slink sneaked out of Liberty and went for help. I’d hardly slept a wink the night before worried about everything that could go wrong. I had to shake off those negative thoughts, though. Slink could do this. He could get to Nelson, he could call for help. Ink believed from the time Slink got word to some man called Harrigan, it could potentially only be only a matter of days before we had help.
I’d stopped by the infirmary this morning to check on Skye, but she’d been sleeping. When a fresh-faced Connie stuck her head around Skye’s door and invited me to spend some time with her and the kids, I’d jumped at the chance. I loved hanging out with the children and knew they would help take my mind off more worrying things. Taking a deep breath, I enjoyed this moment, allowing all my worries to slip away. They’d resurface again soon enough. It was a sure thing. But for now, as I watched the birds dart about the trees, I could pretend I was free from worry.
Ivy stood with Connie, her new bundle wrapped in her arms, the baby fast asleep and oblivious to our peril. Normally, we’d celebrate a birth in Liberty, but our current situation didn’t allow for it. I hoped one day we’d get the chance to rejoice at little Tillie’s birth into our world, but I hoped and prayed even harder it would be a world without Jebediah. Tillie deserved to grow up without fear, her home safe.
“Grace… whatcha lookin’ at?” came a familiar voice.
My eyes lowered to find Jed, a six-year-old blond button of a thing with a head full of curls and a wide, gap-toothed grin. He had recently lost his two front teeth, and while the gaps had been a shock at first, I’d quickly grown used to it.
“Blue Jays,” I said, pointing to the branches resting above us.
“Is that why Jebediah calls you ‘little bird,’” he asked, all casual innocence. “Because you like birds?”
I shrugged and knelt before him. “Probably. It’s not very original, is it?”
Jed giggled before reaching forward and pulling off my beanie. “You don’t need this today, it’s not cold…” His words died off as he took in my newly shaved head. His smile dimmed, and curiosity took its place. Running a self-conscious hand over the buzz cut, I put on my best fake smile.
“I finally realized you guys have it right about keeping your hair short,” I began, trying to explain my breakdown into something a six-year-old might comprehend. “I mean, you only need to use a tiny dollop of soap to wash it, you don’t need to brush it. You can get right out of bed and take off out the door. I guess you could say I was jealous.”
Jed’s smile reappeared. “You look like a boy now.” He giggled.
A false scowl turned my lips downward, and I grabbed him around the waist and began tickling him into submission. “A boy? No way! Say I’m a pretty girl. No… say I’m the prettiest girl you’ve ever seen.”
“Never,” Jed screamed as I tried to pull the beanie out of his little hands.
“Well, isn’t this all warm and cozy,” a loud recognizable voice boomed.
The children’s laughter abruptly stopped, and Jed became frozen in my arms as I slowly lowered him to the ground and moved him to stand at my back. Ordinarily, nerves would assault me in this man’s presence. Today, though, there was nothing but pure, unadulterated rage.
Jebediah was standing in black cargo pants, a black shirt with a long, woolen coat and chunky black boots that stopped halfway up his calves. The metal in his face gleamed as the light hit him, creating some otherworldly glow. My narrowed gaze was drawn to his sister, who stood stoically at his back, dressed in her customary head to toe black slutty soldier outfit. Her hair pulled into a tight bun, weapons strapped to her waist and thighs, no doubt others hidden. Three soldiers stood not far behind them both, also armed to the teeth. My scrutiny was saved for Jeze, though. Jebediah and his cronies were nothing but background noise. She, in turn, stared back at me, unmoving and unnervingly cool. I’d never considered myself a violent person by nature, but in this moment, I was reminded of the cold and calculated woman I was being forced into. I wanted to be brutal, I wanted to kill with sadistic pleasure.
“Now, now, little bird, are we going to have a problem because your man strayed?”
Reluctantly, I turned my attention to Jebediah. The need to protect Ink and correct Jebediah’s assumption was fierce, but I knew he was simply poking and prodding with the hope I’d lose any composure I possessed. Games, that’s what this man was all about, manipulation and taunting, and I wouldn’t play into it anymore.
“What do you want?” I asked, my voice much lower and more severe than I could recall hearing before from my lips.
“Ohhh, you are good,” Jebediah shouted, slapping his thigh as he laughed loudly, his body twisting to look toward his men at his back. “You see her? Cool as a fucking cucumber.”
I felt Jed flinch at my back, and I placed my hand on his arm and gave a gentle squeeze. “Talia, Connie, I think the kids have had enough sunlight today.”
“Don’t fucking move,” Jebediah snapped, his long finger pointing at Connie who froze after taking a single step forward to gather the children and get them to safety. He then prowled toward me, taking me in and paying special attention to my new haircut.
“I like it,” he said with a grin. “You’ve lost some of that...” waving his hand in the hair, he circled me, “… innocence.”
“What. Do. You. Want?” I repeated, my anger palpable.
“Don’t take your anger out on me ‘cause your man decided to dip his wick in another woman’s pot.”
Rolling my neck, I searched for the self-control I was quickly beginning to lose. Looking beyond the egomaniac that was standing right in front of me with the satisfied smirk on his face, I once again found myself glaring at Jeze. Her dark, fathomless eyes met mine, and she appeared to get no satisfaction from my anger. She was like a mask of indifference, and it only made my anger grow. I wanted to ruffle her, see that self-control torn away and the vulnerable woman who no doubt would be buried beneath.
“Tut, tut, tut,” Jebediah purred, using a finger under my chin to pull my attention back to him. His touch revolted me, but I didn’t so much as flinch. Chewing on one of the rings in his bottom lip, his mouth widened into a grin before he suddenly leaned forward and peered around my waist, finding Jed huddled into my back. “What do we have here?”
Taking a step backward I tried to hide Jed from Jebediah.
“Stop moving, little bird, or I’ll have the cub dragged out by my men.” His threat was delivered with an icy calmness that promised he’d see it through.
“What’s your name?” Jebediah asked.
“Jed,” the scrawny boy at my back answered, his hand slipping into mine.
“Jed,” Jebediah repeated with excitement. “Like Jebediah and Jeze! You could be one of us, you know, Jebediah, Jeze, and Jed.”
My patience snapped, and I used my body to block Jed from the psychotic pale asshole. Jebediah stilled, before slowly rising to his full height with anger dancing in his pale eyes.
“Leave him alone,” I demanded.
The tick in Jebediah’s jaw belied the calm façade he was trying to present. When a sound to my right caught my attention, I realized Connie had moved, trying to gather up the children and get them away from the threat. It happened so fast it actually took me long moments to realize what the loud explosion of noise was.
Almost in slow motion, my eyes followed Jebediah’s outstretched arm down the heavy black wool from his coat that ended in a neat cuff where his narrow, pale wrist began. In his hand was a gun unlike any I’d seen before. It was obscenely large, and the light bounced off the immaculate silver finish making the piece gleam. My gaze was drawn to the intricate engravings of sweeping arcs and pretty curls that had been embellished on the deadly weapon. The barrel was long and heavy looking, with the word ‘Pale Death’ etched in an elegant script. From the end of the barrel drifted a soft spiral of smoke, like a seductive dance in the cool forest air.
I hadn’t realized the noise around me had disappeared until it began to drift back, and the horrified screams of the children broke the spell I’d been cast under. Turning, I found Connie’s lifeless form in a heap amongst the leaves, grass, and mud. A bloom of red beginning to take form in the middle of her forehead, and the reality of what had just happened slammed into me, taking my breath away. My eyes widened as shock almost brought me to my knees. With my heart galloping in my chest, I turned to face Jebediah, the only thought running through my mind was revenge.
“Oh, little bird,” he crooned as he dragged a sobbing Jed out from behind me, his pretty gun resting on top of the boy’s mass of blond curls. “I know that look in your eye, I even understand it, but baby… it’s not our time to tangle.”
“Why?” I gasped, my voice raw with emotion.
His head tilted to one side in thought, and he was quick to realize I wasn’t talking about why he and I couldn’t tangle. “Connie was simply a casualty in war…” He pulled Jed tighter against his body, the gun still far too close to the precious bundle. “This is my game, and we’re playing by my rules. The people here, they respect you, they also respect Ink, but I need you both to remember you all belong to me. I can fuck with you both whenever I feel like it and there’s nothing you can do because you belong to me. The fucking Arena belongs to me,” he rambled on, his voice rising. “It’s your job to keep them in check.” He pointed his gun at Talia who was trying valiantly to calm the children. Their cries rose as the weapon swung wildly in their direction “And if they step out of line, there will be consequences.” Spittle sprayed from his mouth with his last screamed declaration.
Jed was shoved back into my arms, and I stumbled to take his weight as he wrapped his tiny arms around me, trying to climb up my body and hold on for dear life. Jebediah smiled, his rant over, his composure once again locked down as he slid the gun inside his coat. Taking a few steps away from me, he looked coy and playful, like he hadn’t just taken the life of an innocent in cold blood. His callous indifference made me hate him all the more.
“I’m going to kill you,” I whispered, no longer caring about the repercussion of such a threat.
Jebediah laughed with uncontrolled and insane delight. “I know you’ll try.”
He and Jeze turned their backs and sauntered off with not a care in the world, no fear of reprisal by the people who were beginning to gather around Connie. The soldiers moved a little more guarded, covering the back of their leader, weapons drawn, though lowered.
Jed continued to shake in my arms as the tears of Liberty fell unchecked.