Chapter Twenty-Five
Abby
The apartment is so quiet.
Nothing has held my attention since arriving home from dinner with Levi. I turned the television off an hour ago, unable to get into the high-drama reality shows they’re airing this evening. I sat down to work, but my mind just wasn’t in it. I read the same sentence three times, and when I realized I still missed the misspelling of the word cable, I shut down the program and stared at the blank screen.
The dating app taunts me, so without giving it any further thought, I click on the icon. Instead of skipping over the usual requests I get to introduce myself to others on the site, I click on a few of the faces. Three new guys have liked me, giving me the perfect chance to connect. But I’m not interested.
If I was being honest with myself, I wasn’t really interested when I started this whole hoopla. My heart and my head have always led me towards one man; one that I thought was unobtainable until recently. Levi seems determined to prove to me, and maybe himself too, that he’s capable of sustaining a real relationship.
And he wants that with me.
I find myself back at my previous conversation with SimpleMan. He mentioned wanting Chinese food and Levi took me to Chinese food. That was just one of the few similarities I’ve discovered in the last week or so, but when I asked Levi about it outright–and during a confession time, no less–he denied knowing anything about it.
My gut still tells me something isn’t right.
Another thirty minutes later and I’ve tossed and turned in bed, unable to get comfortable. The clock reads nearly ten, and I’m still wound tight. Finally, I jump up and head for the kitchen. Grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge, I glance through the peephole like a crazy ex-girlfriend and wonder if he’s back yet.
Of course he’s not back yet. He said he’d come over.
Unable to stop myself, I grab the spare key to Levi’s apartment that he keeps here for the same reason he has one of mine. Maybe I’ll just head over and wait for him to get home. I know he said he’d come to me after a shower, but wouldn’t it be a nice surprise if he found me already in his bed, waiting? That sounds way better than sneaking over and sniffing his pillow, huh?
A wide smile crests my face as I slip across the hall and enter his place. There’s a light on above the sink, but I still manage to smack my knee into his coffee table. It must be moved out further from the couch. Rubbing the tender flesh on my leg, I plop down on the couch, worried that I’ll have to limp my way into his bedroom.
Levi’s laptop is sitting on the table and the jarring of the table must have woken it up. It’s bright in contrast to the darkened room, and after a few moments, my eyes adjust enough to focus on the screen. And not just any screen.
PerfectDate.com.
I’d know it anywhere, even if I didn’t see my own profile name at the top of the message screen.
AngelEyes: What’s for dinner tonight?
SimpleMan: Chinese. I’m starving, angel.
AngelEyes: Busy day at work?
SimpleMan: The busiest. I’m exhausted.
AngelEyes: Maybe you should order in and crash early tonight?
SimpleMan: I would but I’m taking my girl to dinner. She’s the best part of my day.
AngelEyes: *winky* Good for you, Simple. I’m off to get ready for dinner.
SimpleMan: Bye, Angel. Have fun.
AngelEyes: Bye.
I cry out, my hand covering my mouth as I read the screen a second, then a third time.
All this time.
Since the very beginning.
Levi is SimpleMan.
SimpleMan is Levi.
He lied to me.
The tears are falling before I can stop them. I feel them hit my hands as they hold the laptop, the wetness doing nothing to mask the numbness taking over my body.
I scroll up, gazing through tear-filled eyes at every conversation I’ve had with SimpleMan over the last month. When I reach the beginning, I click on his profile, bringing up the photo of the guitar. Now that I get a good look at it, I can tell it’s his Gibson. His favorite.
Oh, Levi. What have you done?
Unable to control myself, I search his profile for any signs of his online activity. I’m shockingly surprised to not find anything else. No messages, no other connections, no meetings set. Just AngelEyes.
What does this mean?
Standing up, I set his computer back down on the coffee table. I may not know why he’s done this, but I do know one thing as plain as the nose on my face: he lied to me. I specifically asked him this evening, after I noticed the similarities, if he was on this site. He said no. He said he wasn’t, and I believed him.
I. Believed. Him.
Anger races recklessly through my entire body. Pacing back and forth, I contemplate my next move. I want to play him at his own game, just the way he played me. He toyed with me, making me believe there was something more between us. But there wasn’t. There were games and lies and heartbreak.
My heart aches at the thought of losing him, but how can I remain friends with someone who would so easily toy with my emotions? I can’t, that’s for sure. Levi’s not the person I thought he was, not by a long shot.
Grabbing my phone, I snap a picture of his laptop, our last conversation clearly visible in the photo. My heart hammers and my mind swirls as I glance down at the key still in my hand. With shaking hands, I set the key on the table, right next to the laptop. Then, I grab my phone and head towards the door.
Slowly, I gaze around the apartment I’ve spent almost as much time in as my own. The laughs, smiles, meals, and yes, arguments we shared as friends. Gone. They evaporate like puddles in July. Here one minute, gone the next.
Making sure the door is locked behind me, I give it a pull and close myself off from Levi for good. God, my heart hurts so bad. Wiping more tears from my face, I let myself into my own place and walk numbly into the living room. I don’t allow myself to wallow in my misery just yet. No, when I fall apart, it isn’t going to be here.
With quick resolve, I make my way to my room and pack a bag. I have no clue what I even throw in the old, worn suitcase, but I fill it with some of my belongings and head across the hall to my bathroom. I grab my toothbrush and hairbrush, choosing to leave my makeup behind. It’s not like I’m going to feel like getting all dolled-up anytime soon anyway.
Before I head out, I make my way to my office. I send a quick message to my boss, taking tomorrow off as a personal day. Without checking the rest of the emails, I sign off and bring up the dating app. Grabbing my phone, I upload the photo of Levi’s laptop and attach it to a new message. My words are short and sweet, and hopefully to the point.
Then, to make sure this mess never happens again, I deactivate my profile page and sign off for good. Swiping at more tears, I close down my entire computer and head towards the door. Without so much as a glance back, I’m out of my apartment and heading down the hall. As a sign of defiance, I press the call button for the elevator, and am pleasantly surprised it arrives just a few moments later. Like a man walking the plank, I step into the car and head down to the lobby.
With my bag tucked securely in my trunk, I slide inside the car that I used to love so much. Hell, so much used to give me joy, but now everything seems tainted. Everywhere I look, I see signs of Levi, and then I think of his deception. Now I’m probably going to have to sell my car, leave my apartment, and move to Guam just so I can get a little peace. Because if I know anything about my best friend, it’s that he’ll never give me a moment’s amity–even subconsciously.
I pull my car from my parking spot and head towards the only place I can picture showing up so late at night. No, that’s not true. Any one of my sisters would welcome me with open arms, even in the middle of the night.
More tears threaten to fall as I drive through the mostly deserted streets of Jupiter Bay, heading towards my childhood home. As I pull into the drive, the front porch light turns on even before I’m out of the car. When I reach my trunk, a warm hand wraps around my shoulder before reaching down to grab my luggage.
My dad wraps his big, strong arm around my shoulder and escorts me into the home where I grew up. The familiar scents, photos, and furniture are too much for me, and as soon as the door is closed, I burst into tears. He never says a word, just holds me tight while I cry.
I’m home.
I’m surrounded by the only man I can trust not to hurt me. I thought there was another one I could trust just as much, but he proved me wrong. Thinking of Levi causes a physical pain in my chest, like someone is cutting me wide open with a butter knife.
“Come on, sweetie. Let’s get some rest. We’ll talk in the morning,” Dad whispers, placing a kiss on my forehead.
He leads me up the stairs and into the small room I shared with my twin sister growing up. My head hits my pillow moments later, but sleep evades me. My mind whirls with memories of my time with Levi; everything from casual dinners, to cooking lessons, to making love.
There’s no way I’ll get any sleep tonight.
And why would I want to, when every time I close my eyes, I see his hazel eyes and his killer smile.
Welcome to Hell.