Chapter Sixteen
Gia
I’m happy. Like really happy. It’s been barely a week since our movie date and things are really good between Simon and me. We’ve talked every day, mostly by text, but we even managed to grab lunch one day. I’ve missed him so much that, now that I have him back, my heart just wants to soar out of my chest.
I don’t think we are dating though, I think we are just trying to get back to friends. There is some touching. As in, occasional hand holding, but nothing even remotely PG-13. Mostly, I’m OK with that because, you know, baby steps. But I’m starting to crave those lips of his. Kissing Simon was something I always thought about and wanted, but never thought was going to happen. He kissed me the night before I left town, and I’ve been hung up on that kiss ever since then.
I knew it would never happen again—you know, since he was no longer in my life. But that kiss … that kiss was a stick of dynamite and my heart had no chance of survival.
I’m slightly nervous how things will be between us tonight when we hang out with the group. Will it go back to how things were before the theater or will we have to explain to our friends? Or maybe we will just be civil and nothing will come up. I just don’t know.
Who am I kidding? Someone is bound to bring it up.
I just got another email from my mom regarding my brother. She informs me that Todd hasn’t been acting himself the past couple of days. I muse at the fact that she says he hasn’t been acting normal, because since when has he ever acted normal? She also says that he’s been more aggressive and disrespectful toward her and my dad. But he’s always been that way toward me. She’s just never wanted to listen.
I’m trying to get my mind off of the email when Morgan plops down next to me on the couch. I’ve got my laptop open to a movie reviews blog.
“When did you see the new Pirates movie?” she asks.
“Oh, I saw it last Friday.” I mention this casually, like it's not a big deal. Then I quickly add, “With Simon.”
I continue to finish the sentence that I’m writing, trying not to dwell on the fact that she hasn’t responded. I close my laptop and slide it to the coffee table in front of me. I lean back into my seat and take this time to peek over at her. And she’s just staring at me.
Nervous laughter bubbles up and out of my throat. “Geez Louise, Morgan. Stare much?”
She gives her head a little shake at the same time a knock comes at the door. I take the opportunity to avoid what’s next by jumping up and opening the door.
I’m not sure who I expected it to be on the other side, but I’m immediately thrust between a rock and a hard place because it’s Ruby. Not only am I going to have to explain myself to Morgan but adding Ruby into the mix is going to bring on a grueling round of interrogation.
“Hello, ladies!” Ruby sings as she flits into the living room, drops her purse on the floor, and flops into the armchair adjacent to the couch.
I say hi, but it’s drowned out by Morgan.
“Gia was just telling me how she saw the new Pirates movie last week. With Simon,” she offers.
“Oooh. Y'all know how I feel about Johnny Depp. Was he stunning per usual? Wait a minute, did you say Simon?” Ruby cocks her head and now both of them are looking at me.
I busy myself by heading to the kitchen for a drink.
“Yeah, we’ve been talking more. Texting really.” I launch into a full-on word vomit. “We’ve talked a few times on the phone as well. Also, a lunch. But it’s really been great. Having him back in my life, you know? Even if he wants to be more than just friends, maybe. And I say maybe because we kissed and now he thinks he wants more.” I take a long breath and a sip of water as I meander back into the living room.
“But then we got in a fight because he has a girlfriend—or so I thought—but he didn’t, so I wasn't the other woman. Then we ended up talking about what happened that put us in this whole funk to start with. We worked it out, though. I think.”
So, unloading that information wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be.
But both of them are just staring at me again. I turn and head back into the kitchen to grab a handful of M&M’s. Best if I just keep my mouth full as I start to replay everything I just divulged. Yikes, I might have shared a little bit too much.
Ruby seems to snap out of it first. Again, with a shake of the head and I hear a couple of wows and okays.
“Umm. So first, I don’t think I’ve ever heard you talk for so long without taking a breath. And two, let's rewind a bit, if you don’t mind.”
“I’d like a rewind, for sure,” Morgan adds.
Sighing, I take a seat at the table, so I can face them, which is better than being stuck between them if I went back to the couch.
I nod for them to go on.
“Please let me know if at any point I’m misunderstanding … You and Simon have been texting, talking on the phone, and lunching. And you went to see a movie, Jack Sparrow to be exact. Then you kissed him.” She pauses, and I take a moment to correct her.
“Ah, no, he kissed me.”
“OK, so he kissed you and you …,” she leads.
“I kissed him back. It was more of a make-out session than a single kiss, really. Someone—from behind us, I’m assuming, that is—told us to get a room,” I add, a little annoyed.
Ruby clears her throat but continues. “So, you made out, then you remembered that he has a girlfriend and you got in a fight, which caused you to talk about your past, and now you are friends … and then maybe more? Am I understanding all this correctly, Gia? Mo, do you understand?” She looks over at Morgan who still looks as stunned at me as she did five minutes ago.
“More or less, yes.” I pop in a few more M&M’s.
“Huh. Interesting,” Ruby replies thoughtfully.
It’s quiet for a beat, then Morgan finally speaks.
“What I don’t understand is how you have yet to really tell us about what happened to make this whole thing—as in, you and Simon being friendly, making out for goodness’ sakes—such a big deal. He has had an uncomfortable dislike for you since we introduced you two.”
“I’d describe it more like hatred,” Ruby adds as Morgan continues talking.
“We haven’t pushed you to tell us because you’ve made it clear that you didn’t want to share, but I can’t help but feel a little foolish that this is all happening, and you have been hiding it for the last week. Well, longer than that, really.”
“Yeah, what she said,” Ruby mutters.
I drop my head and let it hang while I take a deep breath. I’m not ready to tell them about Todd yet. If Morgan is this hurt by not knowing the details about Simon and me, she is going to flip when she finds out that I never told her I had a twin. So, I have to tread carefully.
When I look back up at them, they don’t seem mad. They look concerned and a little hurt.
“Simon and I were best friends for a very long time. We had very strong feelings for each other but never acted on them, until the night before I left. Well, at the time we didn’t know it was the night before I left. He told me he loved me and kissed me. I yelled at him, because how dare he wait all that time to tell me only when he knew I was moving away. So, we got in a fight and I left him there at the tree house. And then that night, my mom told me we were leaving in the morning. I was so upset by what happened with Simon, and the thought of saying goodbye … I mean, I had initially thought I would have just a little bit more time with him. So, I thought it would be better—easier for me, if I just left things the way they ended. I didn’t say goodbye. I just left. He called a lot. And I had my number changed. And that was that. I didn’t hear or see him again until we went over to their apartment last year.”
I pause a moment to let everything I’ve just said sink in. I don’t see anger anymore though, it’s clearly sadness. I fear it’s going to turn to disappointment any second now.
Ruby lets out a whistle. “Talk about a small world.”
Morgan starts speaking very carefully, like she is trying to figure out exactly what she wants to say.
“I wish you would have just told us, Gia. That was a heavy burden to bear on your shoulders alone. I’ve laid all of my problems and fears out for you and you’ve always been there for me with no judgment. But you didn’t give me the same chance. Why? Did you not trust me?” She looks like she’s about to cry.
“No! I trusted you from the very first day I met you, Mo. Don’t think that.” Ugh. What the hell is she going to think when she finally finds out about Todd? I continue, “I didn’t want you to know what a horrible person I was—am. I am a horrible person for what I did to Simon. And I haven’t completely forgiven myself yet; I’m not sure if I will. I didn’t want to chase you away.”
I start to sniffle. I don’t cry often, but the thought of losing Morgan scares me and this whole conversation is wreaking havoc on my emotions. Let alone everything that has happened with Simon, and the news of my brother. I’m surprised I haven’t broken down yet.
Morgan stands and walks to me. She kneels in front of me and grabs my hands.
“Gia, you are not a horrible person. And had you told me when we met, I would have given you a hug and helped you through it. That’s what best friends do.” She squeezes my hands and smiles at me.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you,” I mumble.
I should just tell her about Todd now. I really should. I’m going to. Shit. This is going to sting.
But Ruby breaks my resolve.
“So, let’s talk about that make-out sesh.”
Morgan laughs at that, breaking the connection, and walks back to her spot on the couch.
“Was it hot? I bet it was all sexy and manly. Simon is very manly,” she says thoughtfully.
“What does that even mean? How is one manly? If Simon is manly, what is Link? Non-manly?” Morgan wonders.
“No, no, no,” Ruby says with an eye roll. “No, I mean, he just seems a bit more,” she struggles to find the right word and the bright look on her face tells me she found it when she says, “Alpha! He seems more alpha.”
I snort.
“Uh, I wouldn’t say that he’s alpha, but he knows how to kiss, and he knows what he wants,” I offer.
“So, the kiss was spectacular?” Morgan asks.
I sigh dreamily. “Best one I’ve ever had. I mean, I forgot I was in a movie theater. I’m not really one for PDA though.”
Now we are smiling, and all of the heaviness is gone from the air. We talk about the movie and that I have no idea how I’m going to write a review of it. We talk about my lunch with Simon and how it’s going to be when he and the guys come over in just a few hours to hang out. I tell them I honestly don’t know how we are going to act around each other. I hope Simon has clued in Link and Dex, so we can avoid this whole awkward mess again.
While I feel like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders, I’m caught off guard when a sudden flutter of anxiety hits my stomach. I try to take a few deep breaths, but it doesn’t seem to help. I really don’t think seeing Simon tonight and hanging out with our group for the first time since we’ve made amends is going to be a big deal, so I really just need to relax.
Calm down, girl. Nothing is gonna happen.