Julian

 

 

She was avoiding me and doing a really good job at it. I sighed and ended the call I made for what felt like the one-hundredth time. On Desiree’s voicemail, she asked me to leave a message and would promptly return my call. But the sun had set and rose without so much as a text. I was frustrated. Wanting a woman so bad that being ignored by her felt crushing at every minute. It was unnatural for me. What was most disturbing is I didn’t know what I had done to warrant the silence. I played around with a bunch of maybes, which never got me anywhere, so I went about my frustrating day. Business had to go on, so I pushed Desiree to the back of my mind. But as soon as I was in the middle of grabbing a few shots, or checking wardrobe, she’d be there haunting me again.

“Last shots!” Kelsey yelled. “Make it count!”

I stood to the side and watched the photographer work all his angles. Many times, I wanted to jump when I saw a shot I felt was detrimental to get, but I stayed to the side and let him work.

“Turn, turn!” the photographer shouted. “Yes, hold it!” Flashes from his camera lit up the room. “That’s it!” The photographer approached me with a broad smile.

“Wait till you see these last few,” he said nodding his head up and down. Handclaps pulled my attention away from him.

“Mr. Rose!” Lacey waved with a bright smile on her face. Surprised, I traipsed to her.

“Hey kid, what brings you here to see me?” I glanced from her to Desiree, who clutched Antonio’s hand in a fist.

“We thought you would be with Ms. Steven’s, but she said you were busy finalizing everything.”

My gaze traveled to Desiree. “Did she now?” I drawled. Our eyes locked and she smiled gracefully.

“Yes, I did, I knew you were busy with things.”

“I’m never too busy that I can’t take a call,” I said. “I would’ve made time.” I took my eyes away from her. “But you’re here now, right?”

“Right!” Lacey beamed.

“Right!” Antonio mimicked.

“Have you guys had anything to eat?”

Lacey shook her head adamantly. “We ate before coming over.”

A grin spread across my face. “What about dessert?”

Antonio and Lacey’s eyes arched.

“Dessert!” Antonio yelled, and I laughed.

“Follow me,” I said leaving for the eatery station we had set up. “What would you like, brownies, ice cream, cupcakes?”

“So many choices,” Lacey said. Desiree’s laugh sent a ripple crashing through me. It had only been a few days since I’d heard her voice, but it felt like eternity.

“Lacey take Antonio over to a table, and you guys enjoy some dessert,” I said my eyes lingering on Desiree. I didn’t need to tell Lacey twice. She was gone before I could finish my sentence.

Desiree shifted her weight from one foot to the other, her eyes landing everywhere but me.

“How are you?” I asked.

Finally, she engaged me. “I’m good, how about yourself?”

“I could be better.”

Her eyes traveled up then down then back up again. “You look good,” she said with a shrug of her shoulders. “But then, you always do.” Desiree offered a languid smile. She was nervous, and I was about to find out why.

“Did I do something wrong?”

Her hand trailed up her neck then she dropped it. “No, why would you ask that?”

“Forgive me if I’m stepping out of line but, you’re running from me, Desiree and I want to know why.” She swallowed visibly.

 “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“I think you do.” I glided closer to her. “I won’t let you run, Desiree.” I had a notion of tossing her over my shoulder and leaving the room, but I held my animal instincts to a minimum. Desiree sighed.

“I’m not running from anything.”

Her defiance was telling. “What is this about? At least tell me that much so I’ll know why you’ve been avoiding me.”

She opened her mouth to speak but couldn’t find the words. I watched her intently; hell bent on getting the truth out of her.

“Excuse me, am I interrupting something?” Lila entered our silent fight and glided to my side. Desiree’s features change, her beautiful face going rigid then unerringly masked.

“What can I help you with, Lila?”

“Just wondering if I can catch a ride back to the states. You aren’t taking a commercial flight, are you?”

“No.”

“I didn’t think so. I don’t have a round trip ticket; I didn’t think you’d mind since we’ve flown together before.” Lila smiled up at me.

“If you’ll excuse me, I’m going to check on our kids.” Desiree walked away before I could stop her. She flew across the room in record speed. There was no doubt that something was up and if I had to lock her in a room until she spilled it, I would. Glancing back to Lila I spoke.

“You’ll have a ticket waiting for you at the gate,” I said, “I’ve got other plans.” As I spoke, I kept my sights on Desiree.

“Oh, okay,” Lila said.

“I could hear the disappointment in Lila’s voice. “Lila did you see Desiree Monday morning?”

This time I brought my focus to Lila.

“Yes, she was on her way to your suite with a tray in her hand.”

“A tray?”

“Yeah, I think she was bringing you breakfast, it smelled fabulous.”

“Breakfast huh,” I said.

“Yeah, but I told her she might want to give you a minute because you were in the shower, so she went back to her room.”

That was it. I was certain of it. Desiree had mentioned the same thing that morning, but I’d pushed it to the back of my mind thinking nothing of it.

“Excuse me,” I left Lila going straight to Desiree. “Can I talk to you for a minute,” I asked now standing next to her.

“Lacey, keep an eye on Antonio, will you?” Desiree asked.

“Sure thing, Ms. Stevens.”

“Thank you, Lacey,” I said. We left the open area and traveled to a narrow hallway, where I pulled her into a quiet corner and interlaced our fingers. “I miss you.”

A small smile cruised across her lips. “I miss you, too,” she confessed.

“Why are you hiding from me?” I could always tell when Desiree was nervous because she’d finger her hair and fidget much like she was doing now. “Hey,” I reached out to her wanting to connect with those beautiful brown eyes. “I want you always to tell me what’s going on in that lovely brain of yours.”

“Always?” she said finally.

“Yes.”

“Always insinuates us being around each other longer than the duration of this trip. I think using that term is a little far-fetched.”

I pulled her close. “Do you know something I don’t?”

“What do you mean?”

“You speak as if you know things I’m not aware of. Do you plan to ditch me after we leave Dubai?”

“Ditch you?”

Desiree looked affronted, then her face softened, and she laughed.

“Ditch you,” she repeated shaking her head. “I’m sure I don’t need to remind you that our lives are two worlds apart. While you’re constantly on the move, I’m looking to settle down back in Chicago. We lead two entirely different lives, at most, we stay in contact through phone, but I mean, always?”

She frowned and took a step back from me. We watched each other silently for longer than a minute.

“I’m not willing to let you run, Desiree.”

Desiree sighed. “Stop saying that,” she held her arms up.

“I’m not Cameron, Desiree.” I wanted her to hear me, and believe me like her life depended on it. She folded her arms.

“I’m not so sure about that,” she said.

Her words stung, like a stabbing pain to my gut.

“You’re not so sure…” my voice was thick and laced with darkness.

“Julian, I don’t want to fight with you,” Desiree said. “What we shared here in Dubai was the best time of my life. I’ll admit, and I know I agreed to explore our attraction and we did. Now it’s over. Soon we’ll never see each other again, so why not start now.”

“It sounds like you’ve got your mind made up.”

“Am I wrong?”

I grabbed her hand and pulled her into a large walk-in closet pinning her against the closet’s door.

“You are absolutely wrong,” I said, standing so close I breathed in the oxygen she exhaled. “You’re going to stand there in my face and tell me, what I feel,” I touched my chest, “what you feel,” I touched hers, “is purely physical?”

“Julian this is crazy…” she mumbled, trying to escape my gaze.

“Yeah… that’s what I thought. What do you think happens when two people meet and fall in love? When they decide to be together, their lives, families, and friends join as one, also. It’s done every day, so don’t talk to me about leading different lives. That’s nothing that can’t be solved.”

“So, what,” Desire folded her arms defiantly. “What are you saying, Julian?”

I dropped my forehead down to hers and placed my hands on the wall on either side of her head.

“I love you girl, and I want to be with you, always…”

Desiree’s eyes widened and misted over with a glaze of fresh tears.

“Those better be tears of joy,” I said.

Desiree’s hand shielded her mouth. “Oh my God,” her voice was a high pitch whisper. “I love you, too,” she cried, and my arms fell around her. My heart knocked against my chest, and I kissed her temple, down the side of her face and across her tear stained eyes.

“Stay with me, Bella,” I said.

“I can’t,” she choked out.

“Yes, you can.”

“No,” she shook her head, “I can’t. I’m sorry.” Desiree moved but couldn’t make it past my stone barrier. My happiness was short lived, and I felt like a madman instantly.

“Why the hell not?” I roared.

“Because I don’t trust you.”

I let out frustrating breath.

“I saw Lila coming from your room Monday morning. It’s not my business what you do, but if you want to be with someone, you have to have the common decency not to entertain other women.”

“I’m not entertaining Lila; she wanted to talk about her tardiness and attitude since the day she arrived. Nothing more, nothing less.”

“At five a.m.?”

I sighed again. “Yes at five a.m., it’s the usual time to be up moving around. We were inside the room for fifteen minutes at most before I asked her to leave so I could take a shower.”

Desiree’s mind whirled, then she dropped her head into her hand.

“I thought…” her words evaporated before they had a chance to make it into the air.

“I’m not Cameron, Desiree. Let me build your trust back. I wouldn’t dare…”

“Don’t!” she yelled. “Just don’t tell me what you wouldn’t do, okay?” Desiree ruffled her hair. “We still couldn’t, we’re practically brother and sister. Your brother is marrying my sister, remember?”

I snatched Desiree up, and she yelped, shocked by my sudden movement. I crushed my lips to her mouth; sticking my tongue down her throat. I wanted to touch her soul and connect with her spirit. Desiree’s arms slid down my chest; her hands planted firmly against my torso. She moaned into my mouth, and a shudder flew through us both. I pulled up her dress and ripped her panties.

“Would your brother touch you like this…” I snatched my zipper down and thrust into her savagely. Desiree screamed, but I swallowed her cries with my tongue. “Would your brother make you feel like this…” I pumped into her, steady with a violent thrust and made her come instantly. She didn’t even get the words out. There was no warning, just a temerarious vibration that struck her core causing her to whine like that of a stricken animal. With reckless abandon, we rocked, forgetting about anything else going on around us. The warm wetness of Desiree’s fountain brought me to a stark edge. Desiree whimpered, and tears streamed down her face. “Would you be afraid to love your brother like you’re afraid to love me…” I growled. I bit down on her neck and came inside her hard. We moaned together and Desiree’s nails sunk into my shoulders. “You’re mine,” I stated matter of fact. “All mine.”