I COULDN’T HELP it. I tried I even did that old trick where you look in the mirror and talk to yourself as if you’re two separate people. Just. Play nice. I could be nice. I spoon fed celebrities on a daily basis. It was my job to kiss ass.

I just didn’t want to kiss hers.

Because for some reason, being nice somehow felt like she’d won like she was getting in and the last thing I needed was to give her a foothold in any area of my life.

So anger was all I had.

Rudeness was what I clung to.

And I hated myself for it because that wasn’t me, I’d never been that guy, hell maybe she’d turned me into that guy. The one that literally didn’t give a shit if she lived or died.

No that wasn’t true.

I’d always cared.

Too much.

That was the problem.

True to her word, Angelica had gotten ready in five minutes. She slid on her giant black sunglasses and looked ready to take on the world better than most girls who needed at least an hour to look presentable.

Her good looks had always been a part of the attraction, her bow shaped lips and cat eyes gave her an exotic look all the while making her look like she always knew some sort of secret that you weren’t privy to yet.

She walked around like she knew something you didn’t and when she talked to you, you felt genuinely better about yourself for the simple fact that she was speaking.

To you.

I gave my head a shake and watched while she ran her lines with Lincoln.

“Quiet on the set!” One of the PAs yelled.

I grabbed a seat and one of the headsets so I could listen to the lines.

Lincoln was standing in front of the ocean, hands shoved in his pockets while she approached.

“It won’t ever work you know.”

“What won’t?” She asked in that small voice of hers.

“Breaking them up.” He shrugged. “They love each other too much, and you’ll lose everything you can’t afford to lose.”

Her face froze and then she parted her lips and nothing came out.

A PA fed her lines.

She still said nothing.

“Cut!” Jaymeson yelled.

I let out a sigh and tossed the headset back onto the chair. What the hell was her problem now? She forgot how to memorize her lines?

“Angelica, love.” Jaymeson crooked his finger. “A minute?”

She ducked her head and walked over to him.

He cupped her face with his hands and spoke softly. Tears filled her eyes and then she was running off set like he’d just told her she was fired.

“Take ten.” He said in an irritated voice as he approached me and gave his head a small shake. “She’s not in the zone, man.”

“She’ll get there.” Hell, I hoped she got there.

Jay ran a hand over the back of his buzzed hair, messing up the longer pieces in front as they fell across his forehead and smacked against the snake tattoo on his neck. “She better.”

His eyes locked on mine.

“No.” I shook my head. “Whatever shit you’re about to say, no, I won’t do it.”

He lifted his hands innocently. “Maybe if you just… if you could just talk to her.”

“I’m an agent, not an acting coach.”

“You’d be the shittiest acting coach alive.” He chuckled and kicked some of the sand with his leather sandals. “You know she shows up unhappy, she leaves unhappy, Zane made her laugh. Why can’t you make her laugh?”

“Maybe because I don’t owe her any reason to.”

“Hell, man.” He blew out a breath between his lips. “Could you try? Because I need her on her game. I’m doing this as a favor. I had hundreds of girls audition for this role, but you begged me to give it to her.”

Yeah, I’d done that. In a moment of weakness, I’d done that. Because I knew it was her only chance and because I wasn’t a complete monster.

Until I’d seen her again and decided against any sort of future reconciliation.

“We’re already off schedule,” Jay added, twisting the knife further. “She needs to be better or she’s fired.”

And there it was.

“We’re two days in.” The guy made a point. “She’s easily replaced.”

“What the hell do you want me to do? Smile? Cheer her up? Tell her how awesome she is?”

Jay cracked a smile. “Right, sure, but maybe not in such a high-pitched screechy valley girl voice. You knew her once man, knew her weaknesses, strengths, play to the ones that are going to make sure she brings it for the camera or she’s done.”

I felt myself pale.

He frowned and took a step closer. “What the hell are you so afraid of?”

I jerked my head up and whispered hoarsely. “Her.”

“Cheer up.” He slapped me on the shoulder. “You’ve got at least seventy pounds on her. Doubt she’s eaten bread in five years, and I know you run a fast mile.”

“That’s not what I meant.”

He hesitated for a minute, dropped his hand by his side, and chewed on his bottom lip. “I know.”

“I can’t get close to her again.”

“I’m not asking you to sleep with her, Will. I’m asking you to have a little human decency and give her confidence. How you do that, is up to you.” He walked off.

Leaving me staring after him.

I gulped.

Kicked the sand until it flew into one of the PA’s faces and then stomped after her.

It didn’t take long.

She’d gone over the bluff and was sitting with her chin on her knees, her arms hugging her legs. She looked broken.

Sad.

So damn sad.

I took a deep breath, prayed for patience, something I was lacking when it came to her, and approached.

“I don’t forget lines.” She released her knees and leaned back on her hands, tilting her face toward the sun. “I never have.”

It was on the tip of my tongue to say something about how drugs affect brain cells.

“It’s your first job back, Ang. What made you think it would be easy?”

“You!” A smile parted her lips enough for me to catch a flash of white teeth. “I believe your exact words were, nobody will take you but Jaymeson, but at least it’s an easy part.”

I cringed. Yeah, I’d said that. Out loud.

“It’s not the part that you’re struggling with.” I knelt down next to her. “You’re literally playing yourself.”

Her attention snapped to me. “What makes you think that I’m such an easy person to play?”

I had nothing.

“What makes you think that I wasn’t acting then?”

“How am I to know you aren’t acting now?” I countered.

“I’m not that girl.” She looked away. “I don’t think I was ever that girl. I don’t recognize her anymore, and stepping into a role that reminds me of all the shit I did to people who didn’t deserve — well.” She shrugged.

“I think we’re way past a re-write.” I said jokingly.

She smiled again. “If only… right?”

Our eyes locked.

And once again I found myself drowning in the depths of her eyes. I held my breath, then jumped in face first and calmly said. “You are one of the most talented actresses I know. I just need you to know it. Because it’s not enough that it’s on paper, it’s not enough that your agent knows it, you have to show the world. And if you can’t do that — if you aren’t ready, then I need to know.”

Her shoulders straightened. “You really think so?”

Shit. The way she was looking at me.

All frail vulnerability wrapped up in one shiny package that said “open.”

“I do.” It wasn’t a lie. God, I wished I had the ability to lie to her face, to tell her I didn’t feel the current between us, as strong and swift as the ocean, as loud as the crashing waves against the sand.

It would always exist.

And I would always deny its existence.

I had no choice.