Chapter Ten
True to what he figured, Emesh didn’t sleep a wink. Fine with him. He’d spend eternity awake if he could have Douglas in his arms like this every night. He looked over his mate’s gently rising and falling shoulder to read the clock—four a.m. If he eased out of bed now, he’d have time to take a shower and converse with the gods on duty outside. The problem? He was reluctant to move from his spooned position, snuggled behind an extremely boneless Douglas. He marveled how good and how right it felt to be like this.
The half-hour preceding sleep overtaking his Chosen had been everything Emesh had ever dreamed of. After an initial reluctance on Douglas’ part, he’d finally, with gentle urging from Emesh, turned to his stomach and allowed the god to run a comforting hand across his back and shoulders.
“How’s that?” Emesh had tried to keep every last vestige of need from his voice, but his words still came out sounding husky.
“Good,” Douglas grunted. “You have some really weird-ass heat thing going on. Not like…feverish, or sweaty or anything. More like…I don’t know, hot springs or something.” Douglas shrugged under the long, easy strokes being applied across his muscled back. “Sorry. That sounds ridiculous. I’m not poetic or anything. I must still be mostly asleep.”
Emesh liked being compared to a hot spring and continued to release wave after wave of soothing warmth from his pores. It would be best to ratify Douglas’ observations.
“I have an odd thyroid condition,” the god smiled in the dark. That sounded right. He always knew General Hospital would come in handy someday.
“I hope it’s not dangerous,” Douglas’ voice moved toward drowsy, “because it feels really good.” Just when Emesh thought Douglas would succumb to sleep and drop off, muscles jumped to semi-alertness under his hand.
“This doesn’t…mean anything, you know,” Douglas clarified.
Emesh’s heart clenched, recognizing the edge of fear in his mate’s voice.
“Don’t think we’re going anywhere with this.” Douglas continued, big body shaking.
Gods. Between the nightmare and this, something really bad had happened to Douglas. Something they hadn’t uncovered in his records.
“Don’t worry,” Emesh gentled. He turned up the heat, continuing to soothe. Even with that, it took several minutes to stop Douglas’ renewed tremors. “Just think of me like a warm blanket. I’m going to wrap myself around you and keep you safe. I’m absolutely not going to hurt you.”
He―of course―didn’t tell his future mate he wouldn’t know what to do even if Douglas gave him carte blanche. Virgins had that problem. And besides, this was good. Very good. And more than enough for now. Douglas must have trusted because eventually he relaxed under the tender ministrations and fell into a deep slumber.
In the darkness of the early morning, Emesh fought the urge to sprinkle kisses over the broad back right under his nose. He inhaled deeply, instead. Douglas smelled so damned good. Emesh scolded his morning hard-on and coaxed his hips back, away from the soft body that in sleep, welcomed him. He didn’t want to wake Douglas up with a raging stiffie and scare the crap out of him.
The god sighed, slowly and reluctantly shifting away. Humph. A cold shower. Then coffee.
By four-thirty, Emesh cradled a steaming cup in his hands and walked barefoot out of the house. His quiet steps, couched by damp grass, took him to the picnic table halfway across the clearing. He climbed up and perched on top, gazing over the darkened treetops at a vaguely lightening sky. Would anyone notice if he sped things up? He needed the sunrise like other’s needed air. Emesh pouted. The sun’s appearance an hour and a half early wouldn’t go undetected. He’d have to wait.
The smell of java beans filled his nostrils. He’d be satisfied with that bliss for now. It had to be enough. He head-called to his brothers. I’m awake, he stated. What gods are afoot this morning? He got Absu and Ninurta. Apparently, the two had been on duty all night.
“Did you prepare a cup for me?” Absu appeared next to Emesh and looked longingly at the coffee.
“Have this one,” Emesh offered. “I can get another.”
“Nope. It will take me but a few seconds.” Absu misted out and within the prescribed time had popped back, coffee in hand. “Far easier to procure my own,” he smirked. “Don’t worry. Your gentleman-friend is currently occupied in the shower and remained completely unaware of my presence.”
Ninurta stood by, invisible, listening to the exchange. He didn’t have the luxury of corporeality. When you two are through extolling the virtues of your coffee, maybe we could get down to business?
“What’s up, Ninurta?”
The god of many talents sounded out of sorts. The guy’s spiky dark hair looked like he’d been worrying it all night.
We’ve had word from Marduk about your Doctor Trask.
“Not my doctor, big guy,” Emesh corrected. “And not Douglas’ anymore, either. We’re done with him. That asshole did something very bad to my future Chosen, and when I find out the extent of it, I plan on making him pay.” Emesh marveled at his strong, aggressive feelings. Normally, his persona exuded only happiness and healing. Ninurta, who actually held the title God of Healing, concurred, nodding his head. Ahh. Simpatico this morning.
“As long as you don’t try to do it unaided,” Absu told him pointedly, taking a long, satisfying sip of his hot beverage.
“And why wouldn’t I be able to take care of him on my own?” Sometimes the gay thing made people underestimate him, even his best buddies. Emesh seldom got his feathers ruffled, but he felt particularly vulnerable this morning. “I’m perfectly capable of kicking that doctor’s ass without help.”
“Don’t get your panties in a twist,” Absu loved it when he could temper his proper speech with an idiom or two.
Ninurta interjected, What Absu’s trying to say, and very poorly, I might add, is the nasty doctor has more up his sleeve than we imagined.
“I already know he’s not human,” Emesh admitted. “That can only mean that you found out what he is…and it’s not good.”
Yeah. You got that right. He’s a Cambion, with a small order of Bajang on the side, Ninurta dropped the bomb.
“Oh, gods.” Emesh put his coffee down on the table without looking and abruptly brought both hands up to rub his smooth head. “A sex fiend with a demon side that feeds on fear.” His body turned cold. “And depending on the mix, he might fuck, bite, suck, or turn into a cat. What a Hell-spawned combination.” His face took on a horrified cast. “What do you think he did to Douglas?”
“We’re not privy to that information,” Absu returned. “But from the ghoul activity here over the past few hours, the physician in question is still interested in your human. All is clear now, and we’ll make sure that none follow when you embark on your journey. But you must keep Douglas safe and return with him to the compound as soon as possible.”
“I will,” Emesh replied, looking over his shoulder to watch Douglas’ form wander about the now-lit kitchen. He rose to his feet. “Why can’t anything ever be easy for us?”
Hey, man. At least you’ve found your Chosen, Ninurta groused gently. I think I’d be grateful for that bit of luck.
“I’m sorry, Ninurta.” Emesh apologized, slightly ashamed for complaining. “You’re right. I have my mate, and I am thankful. I’ll do everything I can to keep him safe.” He looked to his invisible friend. “You’ll find yours soon,” he stated firmly. He got up and resolutely headed back toward the cabin.
“Good morning,” Douglas murmured, making a show of rummaging through cupboards. He refused to look directly at Emesh. The god sighed. Douglas acted a little less sure of himself after last night. Well, he wouldn’t allow that.
“Douglas,” he ran his eyes over his mate’s damp head and ogled his thick, ropey arms, “you don’t have to feel ashamed you had nightmares. That asshole, Trask, is the very thing bad dreams are made of.” Emesh got a grunt in return, so he continued.
“I’ve already told you this, but I have bad shit that screws with my head, too.” He fished for compliance now. “Maybe we can trade stories once we get on the road.”
Douglas’ back stiffened, and he turned to Emesh. “Just because I had a weak moment last night, doesn’t mean we’re best friends.” His eyes hardened. Emesh felt his mate mentally retreating.
Douglas deliberately changed the subject. “We’ll grab food on the road in a couple of hours. Let’s get moving.”
Emesh didn’t push. He and Douglas had days together, and if his sunny nature couldn’t bring his mate around, he should hang up his tanning salon credentials. He bent by the door and toed on his unlaced sneakers.
Contemplating poor Ninurta—invisible and without a Chosen in sight—Emesh remained thankful for his chance. He whistled as they went through the door, following Douglas down the barely visible path. Before him lay his grand adventure. No way he’d be unhappy for a single moment.
****
Douglas stewed in silence. Listen to the happy bastard, whistling away. Damn it. Why couldn’t he enjoy the morning in such a carefree way? He’d had the best sleep of his adult life, wrapped in the arms of the big man behind him, and he’d brushed the guy off like it meant nothing while the truth lay in the complete opposite.
Emesh made him feel special…safe. When was the last time that happened? Maybe that’s why he’d acted like such an asshole this morning. He feared feeling that way, scared he might like it only to have it snatched away like every other good, clean experience he’d ever had.
Get a grip. Good, clean? Douglas scoffed. Not for him. His life had grown cold, his social skills rough, and sex for him had to be fast and anonymous. That was the long and short of it, and that’s how he liked it, goddammit. How dare this guy waltz into his life and let him think there might be a better way?
Emesh had asked for a rundown of things that gave him nightmares? Maybe he’d oblige. He should let the guy know how he was dirty and used. That would have him running fast in the opposite direction.
Douglas chewed on his lip. But what about Kate? His mother loved him and grasped a lot of what had happened while he’d been incarcerated. Kate and Emesh were friends, and like it or not, his mother had some kind of expectation Emesh could bring him back to his old self. She hadn’t said as much, but Douglas knew his mother. If he understood her correctly, Kate already had Massachusetts wedding bells tolling in her head. But it couldn’t happen. Douglas, a realist, had been damaged beyond repair. The smart thing to do? Tell Emesh to go home. It terrified him that after a single day, he craved the big, happy male.
Douglas beat himself up. He’d liked the closeness of last night. Too much.
There’d been no doubt he’d been out of his mind with that awful nightmare; memories of Trask and his invasive procedures sent cold sweat pouring from his body. But before he got to the point of puking―his norm coming out of those dreams―he’d come awake, straddling a warm, inviting body. Accepting the gift, he’d instantly gone insane with lust. He’d squeezed a neck, wanting nothing more than to flip the pliant body beneath him and pound his terror and frustration away, inexplicably to use the unknown sex partner as he’d once been used.
But soft, soothing words stopped him. Words that penetrated the dark horrors flooding his brain. It had taken a while, but he’d come back to himself and been appalled. Emesh. He’d freaked out and almost choked his new companion to death.
He’d leaped from the bed to cower across the room.
A stark naked and stunning Emesh had slowly risen from the bed and stolen Douglas’ breath away. He was built like a freaking god, and instead of coming at him and beating the shit out of him for putting him in a choke-hold, he’d calmly wrapped himself in a sheet and approached Douglas with soft, compassionate murmurs. He’d come close and paused thoughtfully, so brown and perfectly sculpted with not a muscle or a bulge out of place and reached for Douglas with tender hands.
Douglas had groaned and weakly given in, allowing himself to be comforted. And how odd. Nothing in years―except alcohol―had given him enough courage to regain his bed after an episode, but when Emesh suggested they lay down together, Douglas had followed docilely. Until he’d had a terrifying thought. What if he went nuts again and forced himself on Emesh?
But that damned soothing, bath-water feeling continued to lap over him until his fears dropped away, and he turned to putty. He actually dared to lay face down on the sheets with Emesh’s wonderful hands stroking him from the nape of his neck to the small of his back. Those sensations had almost been his undoing in a completely different way. He’d gone from terrified to comforted to raging hormone hell in minutes. His prick became so hard against the sheets, he wouldn’t have been surprised if a permanent dent imprinted itself in the mattress. And all the while, Emesh rubbed and consoled.
What would his new friend have done if Douglas had listened to his lust and turned on the guy, right then and there? Douglas’ nostrils flared thinking about it. He would have fisted Emesh’s dick, pumping him up and down while rubbing his own cock against the crack of his companion’s ass. After a few warning forays, he would have taken him, hard.
But that thought, too, had left as quickly as it flared. No sooner had he contemplated the act than Emesh’s heat had done him in. He’d not only lost his lasciviousness, he made some lame-ass comment about hot springs. To end the total confusion of emotions, he’d snapped Emesh’s head off, insisting nothing would happen between them. How fucked up had that been?
And all the while Emesh continued to pat him.
Douglas felt like an asshole extraordinaire.
It had taken a long time before Douglas found sleep. He’d eventually evened out his breathing and let his body go limp, pretending…wondering what Emesh would do next.
When his bed-mate gently turned him from his stomach and nestled his strong hard body up against his back, Douglas nearly came undone. Emesh had made the gesture so tenderly and non-sexually, Douglas floundered. Lost. Nothing in his life had prepared him for Emesh.
He’d continued to breathe deeply while working hard to stop the tears that threatened. Emesh, unaware of his turmoil, draped one heavy arm over him, let off more of that odd, wonderful warmth, and had fallen asleep. Eventually, Douglas’ eyes truly closed, and he didn’t awaken until his alarm rang.
At the insistent buzzing, Douglas had stretched and marveled at the depth of his REM and how good he felt…until he realized he remained in bed, alone. Panic sped through him. Had he been such a bastard that Emesh left? Rattled, he’d wrenched himself into a sitting position.
Ahh. Coffee. So, no. Not gone. Just up early.
Instant relief that couldn’t be explained had blossomed within him.
****
“We’ll find a mall and get you some shit to wear before we stop for the night.” Douglas kept walking and gave Emesh a partial agenda. He carried his own duffel over his shoulder. Everything else he needed stayed stored away in the truck. Enough supplies for Emesh to share, but he’d need extra clothes.
Like it or not, the two were stuck with each other for at least four or five days, and after he drove Emesh back to the Blue Hills compound, they could be around each other for even longer.
So, fine. Douglas made up his mind. He’d share some stories with Emesh and see if the other guy had a strong stomach. If Emesh didn’t run screaming for the hills, Douglas might consider letting things progress to the next level. He’d never had a lover before, not in his entire life. Only hook-ups. Emesh could be a first. Douglas wondered how that might work.