CHAPTER 45
ONE YEAR AGO
“Put some damn clothes on. I have a surprise for you,” Linden announces when he appears at my front door. The last time I saw him, he was trying to talk me into coming back to work. But like most encounters with Linden these days, they suck.
“It’s six a.m., scumbag.” I brace my arm on the door’s frame blocking him, but the asshole shoulders his way into my apartment. It’s too early to fight, so I close the front door and turn to find he’s disappeared. He marches from my bedroom and tosses something at me. I catch the ball of dirty clothes before they nail me in the face.
“You want to explain what the hell’s going on?” I have a rule: I don’t dress before ten, noon if I’m extra lazy.
Linden pulls back a curtain and peeks out the window when I hear the distinct sound of a moving truck outside on the city street.
“Are you serious?” I make my way to the window beside him. “Did you promise someone I’d help them move in again? What did I tell you about pimping me out.”
“Shut up and watch. This is the surprise part.”
I take a closer look at the van. It’s small, plain white with no moving company logos. The back door’s wide open with a narrow metal ramp descending to street level. Inside, someone moves boxes among the shadows.
Stepping into the light, a woman appears with two boxes stacked in her arms. She descends the ramp. Even though I haven’t seen her in ages, my heart lurches at the sight. I used to kiss that long pale neck. Those peach lips used to know my name. Her long legs spent hours wrapped around my waist. And those soulful eyes spoke to me without words. They told me everything I ever needed to know in life. That she was mine and I was hers.
“Cait?” The sound of her name causes and old, familiar ache to bubble from deep inside. I press both palms onto the glass and move closer to make sure my eyes aren’t playing tricks on me. It wouldn’t be the first time I thought I saw her.
“Surprise,” Linden says.
I look at him in confusion. My brows lower. She’s outside my window and moving into my building? I turn and slam Linden’s mass into the wall, causing hanging photos to crash to the wood floor. Glass shatters across my bare feet. With the knot of his tie clenched in my grip, I spit six words into his face. “What the fuck did you do?”
“Trying to give you the life you had before you turned into a useless pile of rat shit.” He grips my shoulders and shoves me.
Hurt by his words, I take several steps away until my butt settles on the back of a chair. After Cait left, my life fell apart. I hunch over. My face sinks into my hands, and I rub all the memories good and bad away. The same exact thing I’ve been attempting for years with little success.
Linden straightens his suit and smooths his slicked hair as he watches me crumble into less of a man in front of him. I wasn’t sure it was possible. He places a strong hand on my shoulder. This is his way of comforting me, by trying to fix things. I wish he would leave me the fuck alone.
“Come out and meet her,” he says.
“Why’s she here? I don’t understand.”
“The long story short is I recruited her. She’s my new leasing agent. And she needed a place to live, so she’s your new tenant.”
“Christ, Linden.”
“This is what you wanted, isn’t it? You’ve wanted her back and now here she is on a fucking silver platter waiting to fall in love with you all over again. She just doesn’t know it yet.”
“She still remembers nothing?”
“She sure as shit didn’t remember me. Interviewed her personally. She didn’t talk about her past in the interview, and I suspect that’s the way she wants to keep things. So you should do the same.”
“And act like I don’t know her?”
“Pretty much.”
“That’s the dumbest idea you’ve ever had.”
“We’ll see, baby brother.”
There’s a knock on the door. My heart stops and every muscle in my body stiffens, knowing she’s on the other side.
Linden motions for me to dress, but I stare at the door, willing her to leave. If I see her like this, I won’t be able to function. I already want her as badly as I did the first time I saw her. I can’t help it. Linden’s one hundred percent right. This is what I’ve been dreaming about. That time would roll back, returning everything we lost and give us a second chance.
Linden rolls his eyes when he sees I’ve yet to move. He opens the door anyway. He and Cait exchange pleasantries, words I can’t decipher in my haze.
When she steps inside, I suck in all the air in the room to make it through the next several moments. Even in dark jeans and a black tank, she’s more beautiful than I remember. Tall, yet she makes herself smaller by curling into herself. Perfect except for the scars I know she has all over her skin. In the past, she could be outgoing one moment and a loner the next. Everything depended on her mood or the weather. She said it was because she was a Libra. She constantly searched for balance. Either way, everything inside me wants to sweep her into my arms and never let go. I have to remind myself I’m nothing to her now, even if she’s still, after all these years, everything to me.
“Evan!” Linden yells. He’s been repeating my name, but I ignored him with her distracting me.
“This is Cait,” he introduces us.
I stand as if I’ve been called to duty, but that’s all I can manage. As she stares at me, taking me in, I’m waiting for her reaction. I watch her ears to see if they blush at the sight of me half dressed, shirtless, and in my boxer briefs the way she used to. When they do, my heart skips a beat. I study her eyes to determine what’s most important in this interaction. Despite her amnesia, will she finally remember me? Even a little bit?
She steps forward, her gaze focused on my face, keeping this all business, and reaches out her hand. “Nice to meet you.”
When she smiles, I want to fall to my knees in tears. Not because it’s beautiful, but because it’s not the smile she used to give to me. This is her plastic smile. The one she used for her parents and people she didn’t care for. This is her “I’m being polite” smile. And it’s the same one she gave me when I approached her at school. Her smile has the power to ignite and destroy, and my heart just burst into flames.
It’s here I determine she remembers nothing. Still. And for the second time in my life the woman who used to love me rejects me, and she doesn’t even know it. I give Linden a dirty look. I want to punch the fucker for forcing me into this position.
“Hey,” I respond to her, but my voice is monotone. I don’t lift my jittery hand to shake hers. The pain of touching her and remembering the perfect way our fingers fit might kill me.
She drops her hand at my rejection and wraps it across her stomach. She shifts from one foot to the other in an uncomfortable way, so I know what’s next. She captures her bottom lip with her teeth. I half smile for knowing it would make an appearance before the shadow of loneliness crosses me again.
“You’ll have to forgive Evan; he forgot he was helping you this morning.” Linden steals her attention.
“Oh, thanks. Sorry to wake you.” Cait glances between us.
“He loves this stuff, but I need to get some coffee in him first,” Linden jokes and shuffles her out the door. “We’ll be out momentarily.”
“Sounds good.” She waves with uncertainty. Perhaps she can sense the tension before she disappears from view.
As soon as he shuts the door, I descend, ready to beat the ever-loving shit out of him. But he stops me in his tracks by saying, “Oh yeah, I also promised her you’d show her around this weekend.”