~Tracey~
I went to the club a few days after the mess with Brad, who didn’t seem to even want to make things right. I tried texting and calling him, but it all went straight to voicemail. I tried to go by his studio, but he seemed to be gone every time I was there. What the fuck ever. In anger, I went over to the club on the Moon, the one where I normally would let loose. That might help me figure out what I want.
I didn’t want to sleep with anyone. That wasn’t what my intent was here. I wanted to let loose, try to figure out my feelings, and understand what the fuck I was even doing. I walked into the club, feeling the energy of the atmosphere, and I immediately began to relax.
This was nice. I started to move my body to the music, but then, out of the corner of my damn eye, I saw him. What the hell was he doing here? I noticed it immediately, and when I saw him awkwardly try to move past the crowds, I rolled my eyes. Seriously, he didn’t even belong here. He seemed lost. I wanted to talk to him though, at least to give him shit for this stupid as hell decision he made.
This club wasn’t for people like him. He was too proper. I mean, it was only a matter of time before someone would offer him drugs. Sure enough, when I got closer, I noticed that there was some girl here, high as a cloud and holding some pills in her hand. I didn’t even like this guy, but I wasn’t going to let some tramp take advantage of him.
“What the hell are you doing here?” I said.
I watched as the girl scurried away, followed by a confused expression on the other man’s face. I looked at him, slightly surprised.
“I’m here enjoying myself. Is there something wrong with that?” he asked.
“No, but this isn’t the place for a person like you. This is for people who are trying to let go, to forget about their life for a little bit. Someone who needs a break from the bullshit of reality,” I said.
Not like I was trying to project or anything, but that was my reason for being here. However, he then turned around, and I saw the expression on his face. There was a tinge of sadness.
“Maybe that’s what I’m trying to do. It’s a nice distraction from the paperwork. Plus, I get to see how humans have fun,” he said.
“Well, you need to be careful. Someone was about to offer you drugs. You need to watch out,” I told him.
“You don’t have to boss me around. You’re not my mother,” he told me coldly.
Why this little—
“I’m not trying to. I’m just trying to protect you so you won’t get hurt,” I told him.
“I didn’t expect you, of all people, to care so much,” he told me dryly.
“I don’t. I just don’t like seeing people being taken advantage of.”
I mean, I didn’t, even though at this point I felt like I was fitting that description far more than I cared to admit.
He looked at me and I could see that his mind was filled with questions.
“I understand. Thank you,” he said.
“You’re welcome. Do you want to maybe go talk somewhere? I came here to let loose, but I still can’t. I mean, I’m in a place where people lose themselves in their thoughts, and I just… I can’t do that right now. I’m too hung up on some things,” I told him.
He looked at me, and I expected him to laugh at me, but then he nodded.
“Fine by me. Let’s talk. It’s not like I know anyone here,” he said.
“Yeah. I figured,” I replied.
I walked over to one of the rooms off to the side. I locked the door, ordering a drink from the little computer there. It soon popped up, and I passed it over to him.
“Try this. It’s good,” I said.
He looked at me with a funny expression, but then he took it from me and drank it.
“Not bad.”
“Yeah. It’s nice to come here for the drinks sometimes. And to forget about things,” I said to him.
“What kinds of things?” he asked.
“Just… life things,” I said.
Did I really want to tell this mysterious man everything? Did I want to tell him the agony I’d been feeling because of my boyfriend?
“I see. Well, I am curious about the problems of human beings. And you seem to have a lot,” he said pointedly.
“Don’t have to be so rude about it,” I muttered.
“Relax. I was teasing. Anyway, what is the matter?” he asked.
I finally sighed, looking at him and feeling the weight of the world almost drop forward.
“First of all, before I tell you what’s going on, before I pour my goddamn heart out to a stranger, I need to know your name,” I said.
“Jives. I’m surprised you didn’t know that,” he said.
“Well, you never told me,” I replied. He was acting like he was supposedly famous or something.
“Sorry. Anyway, continue, Tracey.”
“It’s just… okay, so I’m with this guy currently. His name is Brad. I don’t know if you knew this, but I am in a relationship. However, I hate it,” I said.
“I’m surprised that you are, especially since you’re talking to me so much,” he said with a teasing smile.
“You’re the only one listening right now. I mean, my best friend isn’t even picking up. She told me she’d be here for me, but I haven’t heard a peep. Kind of really depresses you, you know,” I told him. I didn’t mean to get so emotional, but this had been building up inside of me for such a long time that when I could finally tell him the truth, it’s almost relieving.
“I get that. I mean, I’ve been struggling to contact Remi for administration reasons. It seems like they’re working on a lot. I don’t really check up on him except in written reports,” he said.
“I see. So, it’s not just me. Honestly, because of that I’ve felt more alone than ever. See, my boyfriend, he’s really not that great of a guy. He’s rich, I’ll give him that, but he’s kind of an asshole. I mean, we have a lot of girls here, and most of the top-tier girls in the hierarchy get the guys. I got lucky. At first, our relationship was based on love, on emotions like that, all that mushy-gushy crap, but now, now I don’t know. I don’t even feel for him like I did before, and a part of me is scared. He doesn’t really call me or check up on me. He’s an artist, just like me, but unlike me who’s third rate and just barely making it, he’s famous and getting commissions out the ass. It’s a bit of jealousy, but also some sadness. I don’t like being left alone like this,” I told him.
“I understand. Normally I don’t get involved with this kind of thing, and frankly, I hate emotions, but you seem really torn up about it,” he told me.
“Yeah, that’s putting it nicely, Jives,” I replied.
“Well, what I would say is do what you feel is right. I mean, I’m no expert on the way humans interact with one another. I really am not. But I can tell that this is hurting you. Do you really like the guy?” he asked me.
Did I? I mean, I thought I did, mostly because he was my boyfriend for so long.
“We’ve been together for over a year. Of course I like him,” I replied.
“Well, do people that like one another normally treat their partner like that? I never saw Remi do that, nor did I see Tracey act like that. Seems childish,” he said.
I wasn’t a child. I was 24 years old. But he was 21, fresh out of the art academy. Maybe that was it. Maybe he was kind of young.
“Normally, no. But I don’t want to break up. I’m scared of it,” I said to him. I didn’t like showing vulnerability to people I didn’t know, but there was something about Jives. He was older than me, I knew it, but he also acted as if I could trust him, that he wouldn’t judge me or hate me because of this whole mess.
“You shouldn’t be in this relationship if you don’t like it. I’m not the boss of you, Tracey, but you look to be hurting. I’ve seen this in some videos of humans. I think they’re called ‘movies.’ When they hurt, they look like that. You should do what is right for you,” he said.
What was right for me? What was right for me?
“You know a lot about human relationships and what to say, even though you don’t care about them,” I told him.
“Just because I refuse to get involved doesn’t mean I don’t have knowledge. I want to help, mostly because you’re a member of the human race, and you are a part of my job. Even though I’m not working with the president on intergalactic affairs, this is still work for me,” he said.
I felt a bit hurt that he considered this nothing more than work.
“Could you at least consider it friendship? I mean, I don’t like being seen as just another body to help,” I said.
He looked at me with confusion. Wait, did he never have friends?
“You’ve never had friends, have you?” I asked.
“Of course I have. I took care of Remi for so long,” he said.
“Yeah, but that’s because of duty. Not because you wanted to help him. You were an advisor. You had an ulterior motive to helping the guy. But with friendship, you do it because you want to. You want to be their friend. There isn’t some sort of other compensation there when you’re helping a friend,” I told him.
He looked to me, and I could see he was curious. I mean, did he want to be my friend? It’s not like I’d be against it, but it still surprised me.
“You really want me to be your friend?” he asked.
“If you want. I don’t really have any right now, so it wouldn’t hurt,” I said.
“Then that settles it. I’ll be your friend. I don’t really know how to be one, but I’ll try,” he said.
“Thanks, Jives. You know, you listen way better than Audrey does. I love her, and she is one of my closest friends, but there’s just something different about you. Something that feels right,” I said.
I didn’t know what it was, but when I talked to him, I could feel my heart start to beat a tiny bit faster. He seemed confused, but at the same time, he also seemed happy to hear what I said.
“I’m glad I can assist you. You’re a very interesting human, you know,” he told me.
I blushed. Why did those words affect me like that? I shrugged, trying to play it off.
“I mean, you’re pretty interesting yourself as well,” I said.
He chuckled. “You’ve got that right. But I promise, I will try to help you out as much as possible, Tracey. Be a ‘friend’ to you if that’s the correct word,” he replied.
“Thanks, Jives,” I told him. I meant it. He actually was kind of cool when he wasn’t trying to be all about duty and stuff.
“You’re welcome, Tracey. Hope it works out. I appreciate you talking to me as well. I never realized how nice it was to talk about something other than administration with someone,” he replied.
I laughed. “You know, you take yourself way too seriously. But I do like talking to you as well. By the way, here’s my number,” I said. I gave it to him, and after that we parted ways. In truth, I liked Jives a lot. Sure, he was almost obsessive about his job, to the point where I don’t think the bastard even knew how to have fun, but I liked that about him. In a strange way, seeing that come apart over time was riveting, and I liked seeing just how different things could be once the masks finally came off.
I spent the rest of the night wandering about the club but, frankly, I felt like I knew the answer to the questions I had. I needed to talk to Brad, to hopefully find out the truth. Maybe then he’d tell me what’s really going on, and everything would be okay.