Chapter Thirty-Nine - Harper
James is quiet the whole drive home, and this bugs me. So much about him bugs me. It’s like one second he’s everything I need right now, then that gets turned off and he’s back to being the job. Plus, I admit, I’m falling pretty hard for him. All it takes is a look and I’m wet between my legs, secretly begging him to touch me. And after he said all those things to me last night about trust—if I tell you to walk through fire, it’s because I know you are fireproof, and the ten days’ promise—it’s like he knows just what I need. Like he’s got the inside scoop on how to make me feel desirable. And safe. He knows how to push all the right buttons. He takes the anxiety away. Hell, the past few days have been so easy for me in terms of keeping the anxiety in check.
But why them? Why am I here with these two? It’s just weird. There has to be something the Admiral wants from James to give me to him. The only other explanation is that the Admiral is setting James up.
But for what? And why? The Admiral made that offer twelve years ago, so how can all this be related?
Shit, I have no idea.
James turns into the long driveway that leads us back to the house, and I notice Sasha is quiet in the back. I turn around in my seat and she’s sprawled out across that table thing that separates the buckets. “You didn’t make her put her seatbelt on?”
“No?” James answers absently as he parks the Hummer. “Well, hardly matters now. We made it home and she’s still alive.”
Maybe this is a stupid example, but earlier he’s demanding she buckle up and sit straight, like her safety is second nature. But now he’s… distracted. Sasha is off his radar.
James gets out and then opens Sasha’s back door. I watch from the front seat as he nudges her. “Wake up, Smurf, we’re home.”
Home. Hmmm. This is not home, but again, he’s using a term to evoke feelings. Is it for himself? For me? For Sasha? Or is it genuine and it’s for all of us? I just can’t tell.
He slaps her on the leg and she kicks him. I have to chuckle at that. But James just pulls her out of the backseat and throws her over his shoulder. “Let’s go, tough kid.” I get out and follow him to the door. Sasha is half awake now, kicking and complaining for him to set her down. He opens the door with one hand and flips her over, making her squeal as she is unexpectedly placed on her feet. “When I say move, soldier, you move.” He winks at her. “Or I’ll make ya move, brat.”
She growls at him and then stomps off down the hallway towards the room she’s using.
“I’m ready for bed,” James says as he shuts the door behind me. “You ready for bed?” He doesn’t wait for an answer, just takes my hand and leads me over to the other hallway where our room is located. We don’t even bother turning on lights. The moon is half full, and there are enough skylights in this place to allow the moonshine to filter in and give it a surreal quality.
Once we get inside the bedroom, James closes the door, reaches behind his head, and pulls his shirt off in one smooth motion. “I’m fucking exhausted. Tomorrow we’re heading back to the OC.”
I’m a little bit stunned at this revelation and I lose a whole second through hesitation. “Don’t you think they’ll be looking for us?”
“Yeah, probably,” he says, unapologetically. “They’ve been looking for you all year, Lionfish. I highly doubt it’s secret. But I just got a message about some missing files that were found.”
“What? How?” I recover quickly but that’s my second hesitation in this conversation. I’m not sure it’s quick enough. “I mean, how did you get a message?”
“I used the bar phone at the restaurant. I have an answering service. Merc and I share one, actually. It’s not covert or anything. 1-800-Rent-A-Receptionist or some shit like that. We leave voice mails on there. And Merc left one saying he found some intel on some files your father’s been looking for.” He eyes me, asking the silent question.
“I don’t have any files, James.”
“Obviously not these files. Because these files have been traced to someone else. And I’ve gotta go collect them.”
“So you’re on a job? You’re gonna kill this person?”
“Whatever it takes.” He smiles at my revulsion. “I’m kidding, Harper. Shit, have some faith in me. I’m capable of getting everything I need without violence. Look at you,” he says as he wraps his hands around my waist. “I talked you into being mine. Not a shot was fired.”
I smile at him. But inside my mind is spinning. Did someone find the files? Jesus, I hope not. We’re well and truly screwed if we don’t have those files.
“Come on,” he says as he leads me over to the bed. “Come sleep with me.”
I can’t say no to that. Not even if I wanted to. I slip off my shoes and climb onto the bed. The covers are all disheveled from our earlier tryst, but they are soft and easy to appreciate. This Merc guy might be a cold-hearted killer according to Sasha, but I am in love with his house. I could totally picture myself living in a cozy place like this. The adobe walls keep the place cool, but it’s warm in all the ways that count. How bad could a guy be if he owns a place like this?
James scoots in next to me, his shoes gone, but not his jeans.
“Aren’t you gonna get undressed?”
“Aren’t you?” he asks, teasingly.
I slip my shorts down my legs and kick them until they fall off the bed. He leans in and kisses me. “I’m gonna get some shut-eye. Is it OK if I ravish you in the AM?”
What? Oh my God, I think that was a rejection. “Um… you’re not in the mood?” I have no reference point for this. He’s been dripping sex since we met.
He puts his arm around me and pulls me close to his chest until I position myself with my shoulder in the crook of his arm and my cheek over his heart. I listen to it beat for a few moments. Steady. Calm. Strong.
I think I love that sound.
“Not true at all,” he says, kissing my hand. “I’m just…”
“Just what?” I’m anxious for a moment. Because something is wrong and he’s on the verge of telling me what’s bothering him.
“Stressed, I guess.”
“About me?” I ask, lifting my head up off his chest so I can look him in the eye.
“No, this job and stuff. That’s all. Not you, Harp. You’re the only good thing in my life right now.”
“You just need to think?”
“Yeah, baby,” he says in a whisper that tells me he wants this conversation to be over.
“Nick used to get like that. All withdrawn and moody. Need to plan shit, Harp, he’d say. Sometimes I’d play music for him when he was like that. He’d sit in the saloon and pretend to read, and I’d play the harp or the piano.”
This makes James chuckle in a very sexy way. It rumbles up through his chest and caresses my face. “You do not play the harp.”
I smile. “I can play the hell out of a harp.”
“One of these days I need to hear that. I’d like nothing more than to think all my worries away to the sound of you strumming a harp.”
God, that makes me so warm inside and I am wishing so hard for a harp right now to ease his mind. “I can give you a massage if you want.” I don’t wait for an answer, just sit up. “Turn over. This will make you feel better.”
For a second I’m afraid he’ll reject me this way too, but after a slight hesitation he turns over onto his stomach and props his hands under his forehead. This makes the muscles of his upper arms look delicious enough to lick. I’m about to lean over and do it too.
“I think there’s some little lotion samples in the bathroom. Go get them.”
Ah, my bossy man is back. I like him better this way. I jump up and make my way to the bathroom in the dark.
“Leave the light off in there, I don’t want any lights on tonight. Just in case.”
“Just in case?”
“I think they’re under the sink.”
I drop it because I’m not interested in talking about bad shit right now. I find the little travel-sized bottles of lotion and grab three. I go back over to the bed, put two on the bedside table, and then twist off the cap. “Mmmm. This one smells like flowers.”
I straddle his thighs and my pussy is instantly throbbing as the rough denim of his jeans presses against the sensitive area. Jesus, I’m going to regret this if he’s really not in the mood to fuck me tonight. I lean over his back and drip the lotion all over him. He sucks in some air through his teeth and mumbles something about it being cold. But then my hands take over and his mumbling ceases. I knead the muscles in his lower back first, moving my thumbs in an outward pattern. I’ve never given a man a massage before, but I’ve had lots of spa days at various resorts. So I know what feels good.
I work on that for a few minutes, then ease my way up his spine, being gentle in this area because that’s how I like it. When I get to his shoulders I have to reposition myself because I can’t reach. I straddle his waist this time, and he and I moan at the same time.
“Take your panties off, Harper,” he says in a whisper.
I roll off him and have those panties off so fast he barely notices. I straddle him again and this time he growls.
“You’re wet.”
“I am,” I say as I squirt some more lotion on his upper back this time. I begin working on his shoulders, gripping his muscles tight enough to make him moan and then easing up as I move down his arms. Each time I do that, I rock forward a little, rubbing myself on him. I’m not sure what that feels like on his end, but I’m in heaven and my desire is building.
“Do you like that, Harper? Do you want to get yourself off on me?’
I bite my lip. “Um, that’s not really what I was thinking…”
“I want you to. Rub your pussy on me. I want to make my whole back wet with your come.”
My mouth is making a little o-shape as this request echoes in my brain.
“Do it,” he says again. “Now. And don’t stop rubbing my shoulders. That feels fucking fantastic.”
I gulp a little air and resume his massage as I begin my own. I lean forward, gripping his shoulders as my pussy glides against the dip in his lower back, and then when I move backwards, I slide my hands down his arms.
“Harder,” he whispers.
I’m not sure if he wants me to grind on him harder, or for me to massage him harder. So I do both. My hips begin to rotate back and forth, pushing on him, slipping back to the firm muscles of his ass, all the while I massage his shoulders. I have to lean way over in order to reach and this makes my breasts lightly brush against his shoulder blades.
“Take that shirt off,” he demands after a few passes of my confined nipples.
I have that shirt off so fast, he’s barely done speaking, and then I’m reaching under him to unbutton his jeans. He rises up on his knees for a moment, my body still lying across his, and my fingers frantically free his cock. Then he lies back down and I begin pulling on his pants until they are down far enough to allow him to kick them off.
And for the first time… I appreciate his body for what it is. A thing of pure beauty. I was surprised to find he had no tattoos when we first met. Killers and tattoos seem to go together.
But now I know why.
He is beautiful. His body is not a blank canvas. It’s a masterpiece. Adding to it would detract from its perfection.
I place my pussy over the top of his ass again, leaning forward, letting my breasts dangle down to caress his shoulder blades as I move my whole body back and forth across his chiseled back. My nipples perk to attention and everything beneath me becomes slick with my own wetness and the heat we are creating. “Come, Harper. Come for me, baby.”
Our breathing becomes loud and heavy, ragged and on the verge of gasping as my belly rests in the curve of his lower back and I twist my hips and place my hand between my legs.
“No,” he whispers. “No hands, Harper.”
“This isn’t enough. I need more, James.”
He flips over so fast I lose my balance and fall over to the side of him. His hands wrap around my waist as his hard cock pushes against the slit of my pussy. I grind against him. “Put it inside me, James. Please,” I beg.
He pushes me up so I’m straddling his waist again, only this time I’m facing him and I can see the desire painted all over his face. “You’re not getting off that easy, soldier.”
“Please,” I pout.
He shakes his head and pulls me forward by my arms. “Come up here,” he whispers.
“Come up where?” I’m confused.
“Put your pussy over my mouth.”
I almost come from that request. In fact, I gulp down air.
“Now, Harper. I don’t like asking twice.”
I nod and scoot forward. He licks his lips and I lift my hips up and straddle his head. A flick of his tongue almost does me in, and I take in a huge breath and hold it.
He pushes my hips up a little and then says, “Grind on me, baby. Grind on my face.”
I can’t even think straight, those words… I move my hips back and forth, dragging my clit over his scratchy jaw. At first it’s too rough, but then my pussy is so wet, I only feel the contours of his chin. I am close, so very, very close… but when he reaches around and inserts a finger into my ass—I’m done. I’m gone. I’m moaning out his name. His tongue is flicking my clit, then he places his whole mouth on my pussy, tightening his grip on my hips, and sucks.
I lose all control. I gush all over his face. I might’ve joined the O game late, but I’m on the team now. There is nothing better in this world than this man making those feelings burst forth from my body. The shudders of pleasure continue for several waves, and when they finally dissipate he throws me off to the side, gets up, and stands in front of the bed. “Kneel, Harper. Now.”
I am not even close to recovering from my orgasm, but I scramble to do what he asks. I don’t want to keep him waiting. I lower myself slowly to the floor, my knees soothed by a rug in front of the bed. His fingers thread though my hair and pull it back into a ponytail. “Do you want to know how I like it, Harper? Do you want me to tell you how to suck my dick?”
Oh God, this question. He asked me this that first night. I swallow hard and nod my head. “Yes, James. Yes. Tell me how to do it right.”
He smiles and fists his cock, pumping it, even though it is rock hard. “Open your mouth, tilt your head back, and take it down your throat. Breathe like I told you before.” I open and the tip, already wet with anticipation, enters my mouth. “Don’t suck yet, just take it in.”
The length of his cock slides to the back of my throat, bounces against my soft palate, and I gag. “Shhh,” James says softly. “Stop, just breathe through your nose and watch me, Harper. Eyes up here.”
I focus on his face, watching him watch me.
“Now, baby, put your left hand behind your back, and cup my balls with your right. Oh, fuck,” he moans as I obey. “Fuck, yes, that feels good.” His eyes close for a moment and this affirms that what I’m doing is making him as crazy as he makes me. I grip his balls tighter. They overflow my small hand and they are drawn up tight. And then he begins to grind his cock against my throat. “Swallow me, Harper.” At first I think he’s gonna come down my throat, but then I realize he wants me to move my throat muscles against the head of his cock. I swallow for him and he growls. “Yes, do it again.”
I swallow again, then again, and then again. And each time his fist pulls my head forward and his hips push against me. There is so much saliva in my mouth I begin to drool. I’m still watching James, my attention is only on his face. I feel that power I have again. I own him right now. He will do anything to keep his dick in my mouth. I open more, gag a little, swallow it down as best I can. And then he opens his eyes and says, “Groan for me, groan against my cock, Harp.”
The noise is a natural reaction to how fucking horny I am. The groan rumbles up through my throat and I can tell he’s close, and I’m preparing myself for the gush of hot semen when he pulls out, dragging a long string of saliva with his cock. He lifts me to my feet, pushes me against the dresser and hikes my leg up.
“I’ll take your pussy over your mouth any day, baby. Pussies are made for cock.” And then he thrusts inside me, lifts me up by the ass, sets me on the dresser, pushing me back against the mirror, and he thrusts until we both explode.
He collapses on top of me after the last pulsing wave is finished. “Goddamn, Harper. You drive me wild.”
I have to bite my lip to stop the laugh. If he only knew. “That’s how you like your cock sucked?”
He chuckles. “Yeah, that right there was fucking heaven.” He’s breathing hard into my neck and I’m almost horny again. But he lifts me up, slaps my ass, and walks me over to the bathroom. “Shower time.”
He sets me back down on the counter but my arms are wrapped around his neck and I can’t make myself let go. “I know you said you’d come back for me, James. But I can’t do it. Please don’t leave me. Please, please, please.”
He frowns down at me, unable to give in to my request and unable to lie. “Ten days, Harper. I’ll never be gone longer than ten days.”
“I can’t live ten days, James. I won’t make it ten days without you. I swear, I won’t. So much can happen in ten days.”
“You will, baby. I promise. I’ll make sure of it. But just relax. I’m not going anywhere. That’s just a what if. It’s not real.”
“It’s not real?” I’m desperate for anything so I latch on to this.
He shakes his head. “Just a what if.”
But this what if just makes me think of all the other what ifs that might happen.
What if those files are really gone?
What if Nick is dead?
What if James really does leave?
And the worst what if of all. What if he doesn’t come back for me?