Chapter Six
Nate
I stared at Dylan’s text message and frowned. What the fuck was he thinking? I’m surprised you haven’t hit that already. What the hell was that supposed to mean? Did he really think he was going to hook up with her? I could feel my skin getting hot. There was no way that Janie would hook up with him. She wasn’t the sort to have one-night stands and hook up, I knew that already. But I also hadn’t thought she would match and connect with Dylan this quickly and head out on a date with him. What was she thinking? Had she absolutely lost it? Why was she acting like a desperado? Was she completely out of her mind? Did she know how unsafe it was for her to meet up with some strange guy from the Internet that she didn’t even know. I couldn’t imagine that they had exchanged too many messages before they’d met either. What was she thinking? I knew I was also upset that she hadn’t confided in me about the meeting or the fact that she’d gone online. It hurt me that all of her dating related information was coming to me via Anabel. And I wasn’t sure why Anabel was even sharing the information with me; given my history with Janie. I was mad that I had to get involved at all, yet I knew that not being involved in Janie’s life was something that I couldn’t fathom and I didn’t even want to think about the reasons why.
I tried calling her one last time and threw the phone to the couch when I heard her voicemail recording again. I grunted as I stood there. I could feel the anger emanating throughout my entire body. I sank down on the couch to think. What should I do now? My vibrating phone made me jump and I grabbed it quickly.
“Where have you been?” I snapped as I answered without looking at the screen.
“Sorry what?” Kylie’s soft voice sounded surprised. “Nate?”
“Oh, Kylie, sorry, I thought you were someone else,” I said, feeling even more annoyed that Janie wasn’t the one on the other end of the phone.
“I see,” she said and paused. “Am I calling you at a bad time?”
“No, no, it’s fine.” I stifled a sigh. “What’s up?”
“I just wanted to know if we were still on for tomorrow night?” Her voice sounded unsure. “I hadn’t heard from you.”
“Yeah yeah. Sorry.” I looked down at my watch. It was past midnight. Had Janie stayed the night with Dylan?
“So, what’s the plan?” Kylie continued and I tried to picture her face. Kylie and I had only met recently and gone on a few dates. She was a cute girl, seemed like a lot of fun and was obviously up for a good time, but I just couldn’t seem to concentrate on her right now.
“Can I let you know tomorrow?” I jumped up from the couch and headed to the kitchen to get my keys. “I have to head out now.”
“Oh, okay.” She paused. “Are we still going to brunch with your friend this weekend?”
“Maybe,” I snapped. “If I don’t kill her first?”
“Sorry what?” Kylie sounded shocked.
“Ha, I’m just joking.” I tried to sound lighter. “Janie has just disappeared for a bit and …” My voice trailed off as I didn’t really know what to say next.
“Oh my God, I’m so sorry. How long has she been missing for? Have you called the police?” Kylie said and immediately I felt a bit guilty for having gotten her so anxious. “Do you think she’s been kidnapped or something?”
“Oh, she’s not missing or anything. She’s just been ignoring my calls. I think she’s on a date.”
“Oh, okay?” Kylie sounded confused. “Janie is your friend, right?” Her voice trailed off.
“Yeah, she’s my best friend.”
“Only your friend, right?”
“Yes,” I snapped. “Look I have to go,” I said and hung up, not wanting to deal with Kylie right now. I headed to the door and hurried to my car. Janie was only my friend now, but at one point she had been more than that. At one point, I had broken her heart. I’d really screwed up in college and I’d really hurt her. Meeting her again four years ago and regaining her trust and friendship meant everything to me. I could still remember exactly how I’d felt back when she’d stopped talking to me and when we’d met up again. I could still remember every second of those days. I got into my car and sat there, not knowing if I should turn the ignition on and go. I felt so angry, worried, nervous, annoyed. I was confused as to why I was feeling so mad. I wasn’t used to this feeling. I wasn’t used to this anxiety. I didn’t like it. I gripped the wheel and my mind drifted off to the past and how different things had been seven years ago.
***
Seven Years Ago
The Night I’d Royally Screwed Up
“Talissa, I really should get going.” I stared into her dark solemn eyes and gave her a small smile. “Maybe we can hang out tomorrow?”
“Oh, Nate, I’m hungry.” She ran her hands down my arm and leaned into me. “Let’s go and get some pho.”
“I can’t right now.” I shook my head. I was supposed to be hanging out with Janie and I was already running late.
“But Nate.” Talissa pouted. “I’m hungry and I thought you said this afternoon was for me.”
“It was for you, but this evening I have other plans.”
“With another girl?” Her eyes narrowed and she gave me a thoughtful look. “Take me for some pho and then I’ll blow you like no girl has ever blown you before.”
“Talissa.” I could feel myself relenting. Janie would understand if I skipped tonight. I could make it up to her later. Anyways, it was good if I wasn’t too available to her. I didn’t want her to start thinking we were in a relationship or anything like that.
“Yes, Nate?” She leaned forward and kissed me hard on the lips.
“Let’s go and get you some Vietnamese food.” I grinned at her, Janie was gone from my mind as Talissa reached under the table and started rubbing me. I remembered about two hours later and sent her a quick text canceling, only feeling a slight twinge of guilt for canceling on her at the last minute. If I’d known she’d never speak to me again after that night, I definitely would have rethought my actions.
“Snap out of it, Nate,” I chided myself and hit my fist against the steering wheel as I felt myself going back down memory lane. Now was not the time for me to start having regrets about how I’d messed up in the past. I could still remember the feeling of sadness that had washed over me when I’d kept texting Janie and asked her to meet up and hangout. How she’d kept blowing me off and not agreeing to meet up until finally she just stopped responding. I could still remember the cold looks she’d given me, as if I didn’t exist, when she’d seen me on campus. I’d never had anyone look through me like that before. It had hurt me more than I’d have admitted to anyone. Even to Janie. Even now she didn’t really know how I’d felt back in those days and we were best friends. However, the past wasn’t something we’d delved into too deeply. When we’d first reconnected, I’d thought it was for the best, but now, now I wasn’t so sure. I sighed as I started the car and headed toward Janie’s house. I could think about talking to Janie about the past later. Right now, I was just mad that she’d been ignoring my calls and obviously making poor life decisions. I only hoped she hadn’t made any decisions that both she and I would regret.