Piper didn’t understand how she had gotten into the situation she was currently in. Her world was chaotic, sure, but the last twelve hours had made the whole thing seem downright comical.

Anson was true to his word. He’d slept on the floor next to her bed, his large frame a dark shape against the carpet. She thought she’d lay awake worried that he was there. She didn’t feel brave enough to offer to let him sleep in bed with her. That would probably be against some kind of company rule, not that sleeping over seemed to be the norm. She gave him blankets and pillows and he set up on the floor in what could only be described as a nest.

The first few moments she could swear she could hear both of them breathing into the dark. The next thing she knew, she was waking up with the light shining in through the window. Peeking over the edge of the bed, there was no Anson. Just empty floor and she thought for a moment that she might have dreamed the whole thing.

That wouldn’t have been a bad thing. Not having cried her eyes out in front of him would have been wonderful. He’d picked her up like she weighed nothing and held her as she soaked the front of his shirt. He’d talked softly to her, told her that she was worth the effort. Things that she used to be really good at telling herself. But after Darius, those words didn’t come easily to her anymore. It was nice to hear someone say those words, even if she didn’t believe them.

A pile of neatly folded blankets on the chest at the end of her bed told her that the previous night wasn’t a dream. She wasn’t sure how she was going to face him, so she’d taken her time showering and getting ready.

Parties at her parents’ house were casual so she chose a pair of jeans with holes in the knees and her favorite fuzzy boots. She layered on a long-sleeve brown shirt and a dark blue down vest for warmth. It didn’t matter that it was October in the Pacific Northwest, her parents had designed their dream house so that they could BBQ year round with a large covered deck off the back of the house and strategically placed heaters that kept the outside space comfortable no matter the weather.

Piper knew that she needed to have the heart-to-heart with them first, and then she planned on finding a stiff drink and parking herself near the fire pit for the remainder of the night. Not knowing if Anson was going to blend in or stick out, she pushed the thought away. There was no use worrying about it right now anyway.

When she came downstairs, she found Anson in her kitchen making eggs and toast. He was wearing her favorite frilly apron with the teapots on it. The sight was unsettling at first. Then she took in the whole picture so she could commit it to memory. It was definitely something she wanted to go over again in her free time. She’d stopped short and gave him a look. He turned around and gave her a look right back. There was a short standoff while they both reviewed each other’s attire.

He quickly informed her he didn’t want to spill on his clothes. Piper was going to suggest he could go change, but she also knew that there wasn’t any chance he was going to get more than a few steps from her at the moment. She could see it in his flashing silver eyes. Whatever woman ended up with Anson as a mate was going to be well watched. She could see that he was the type to hover in that constant state of anticipation. Her father was that way with her mother. He spoiled her rotten. Piper knew that her dad was one in a million so she never put her hopes that high for her partners.

They ate breakfast and drank coffee in relative silence, neither bringing up the night before. Things were said that really couldn’t be explained away yet. It wasn’t until they were on the ferry heading across the water to Whidbey Island that they even started talking in earnest again. She was replaying everything he said now that they were driving to her parents’ house. He’d laid it out for her and she was still reeling.

“Piper, you can be honest with me. I realize that I might be feeling things that aren’t the same for you.”

Piper was leaning over the railing, her gaze on the waves splashing against the hull. She loved being out on the deck even when it was cold. The salty air and seagulls always managed to bring her a moment of peace. This time the rushing water made his words even clearer.

He was hinting at something that wasn’t possible. She barely knew him. Piper wasn’t going to deny that she wasn’t attracted to him. That she didn’t find his gruffness funny and if she was a different person in a different life, she’d be flattered by the big shifter setting his eyes on her.

“It wouldn’t matter if I did. I’m damaged goods.” She didn’t want to say the words. They hurt even coming from her own mouth. But it was for his own good to be honest with him. She was a cautionary tale and he had to realize that he deserved better.

“Don’t fucking say that. You’re not.”

“Anson, can you imagine trying to explain my past to someone I wanted to date? I have stop signs all over me. Only a fool would take a chance on me. Those that would, well, then I would have to call their reasoning into question. No man wants my level of baggage. Those types are either the kind that like the broken ones or want to break you further.”

“I know your past and I don’t mind.”

Piper made a choking sound. “You’re also Kindred. You know that your mate is out there. You can find your true love anytime. It must be nice to have that level of certainty. Humans don’t get that. My experience tells me that it’s even rare for us. Anyone can change their mind and move on to greener pastures.”

“I wish you could see yourself the way I see you,” he said, his voice low and rumbling. She could feel it against her skin when he spoke.

“A woman in need of rescuing? I’m sure you get plenty of those.”

“No, a woman that has rescued herself so many times that she only asked for help because she was afraid for her life. I get that. You were smart. You did what you could all along. Now I’m going to be the one to make sure this person leaves you alone and stops interfering with your future.”

“Anson. You’re… handsome and strong. You know that to a human you’re very attractive. I’m not going to say I’m not attracted to you because I’m a living, breathing woman. It would be a lie. I also know that I’m a hot mess and your mate is out there somewhere. Heartache is not what I want or need right now and that’s the only way it would end up.”

Piper had felt horrible saying it. She didn’t understand his attraction to her. There was no way it wasn’t coming out of pity. She didn’t blame him for it. She was pretty pitiful. But that wasn’t what she wanted from him. Anson was going to have a normal, happy life that didn’t include her in it. That was what he was supposed to have. If KSI could solve her problem then she might have some kind of future too. It might not be as amazing as what he had in store, but at this point in her life, she’d take quiet and alive.

“You don’t understand. I’m going to make you understand this,” he said, leaning over the railing next to her, trying to get in her face.

Piper didn’t bother arguing with him. She fixed her gaze out at the water and the ships that were passing by them in the channels. That would be her and Anson. Two ships passing, leaving nothing but small wakes behind to remember they were even there.

* * *

Anson’s jaw hurt from flexing it. Piper’s harsh words about herself infuriated him. He understood that what she had been through would put anyone into a depression and a state of distrust. He was amazed that she wasn’t suffering from long-term stress over her situation. Her ability to keep moving ahead was nothing short of amazing. Even her feelings that there was something wrong with her and that’s why her weddings never happened could be explained.

It was the fact that she thought she didn’t ever deserve to be happy that made him angry. If anyone deserved a future, it was Piper. But she had already resigned herself to giving up and being alone. There was no way that it made sense for that to be true. Anson knew there was someone that could explain his feelings for her and he wasn’t sure if he could call her. There weren’t rules in place so much as a healthy respect for those that knew things others didn’t. Mary, Clan Fehu’s Crone, would surely have seen some signs if this was supposed to happen.

His feelings for Piper could be just that she made his physical desires so hard to ignore. He liked being around her, even if it was just sitting on her front porch. Anson felt settled with her near. His other jobs had been harder just knowing he was away from her. He liked managing her, not that he’d ever tell her that. It made him feel needed in a way that working his other KSI security jobs didn’t.

He watched her looking over the water, her short hair covered by a slouching black knit cap. She had her arms wrapped around her body with her shoulders hunched up to her ears.

Knowing he shouldn’t, but being drawn to her anyway, he stood behind her, hoping some of his heat would transfer. He watched her hesitate then lean back into him. She liked him. He could see it when her eyes traveled over him. Her scent changed around him. She was choosing to ignore her feelings. The worst part of everything she had said was about his future mate. She wasn’t wrong. There was a woman out there for him. The union his fathers shared always made him wish for that connection. The one that never wavered no matter what kinds of trials you had to go through.

Every Kindred wanted their mate. He couldn’t remember ever thinking it was something that wouldn’t happen for him. Maybe he needed to talk to his dads. It had been almost a week. He always let them know when he’d be out of town and when he returned. Piper’s assignment had kept him close by and there was no reason he shouldn’t have kept in touch. Maybe his dads would be able to explain to him why he was struggling so much. Then again, they might tell him he’s an idiot for considering a human that wasn’t his mate.

Wrapping his arms around Piper, he grabbed the railing on either side of her. If he couldn’t give her the support she needed on the inside he could keep the wind from knocking her over on the ferry.