“Lockwood.”

The sound of her name exploding like a photon blaster into the silence of the armory made Eryn jump, spinning around to see what was wrong. Losing her balance, she stumbled into the shelf behind her where a box of slayer grenades teetered precariously. One of the innocent-looking apple-sized projectiles contained enough explosive to bring down the entire building. She lunged, catching the ordinance just before it hit the ground.

“Now I know something is up. You’re usually as sure-footed as a cat.”

“I’m fine, Major.”

“You can’t fool me, Eryn. We’ve known each other too long. You’re off somehow, preoccupied at work, which isn’t like you, and your reaction time has slowed. It could be the virus you picked up aboard ship or else they’ve missed something. Get back to medical and get checked out.”

“I’ve already been cleared.”

“Well, something is wrong. Forgive me if this comes off rude, but you’ve packed on the pounds, by my guess at least twenty. What gives?”

Instinctively, Eryn slid her hand over her belly, conforming her uniform to her middle. Too late, she realized her mistake and pulled her hands back.

“Holy Christ, you’re pregnant!” Emily’s eyes locked on her expanded waist. “Dammit, Lockwood. Something like this is supposed to be reported to your C.O., at once. There are protocols.”

“The ones that park me behind a desk for the next six months, you mean?”

“Hell, yes. I can’t have an expectant mother leading troops into dangerous situations. It would be a public relations nightmare if something happened to you or the child and it leaked to the press.”

“Thanks for your concern, ma’am,” she replied with poorly veiled sarcasm.

Her old friend grimaced. “Of course, those same protocols are in place to protect you and your child.”

“It’s unfair, Em… I mean, Major. I’ll lose my position, and I’ve worked hard for it.”

“There are ways to prevent this from happening, you know,” Emily pointed out drolly. “And your job is protected until after the baby is born.”

“So, it’s a dreaded desk job.” She grimaced at the prospect, though it was better than a discharge. About to say exactly that, she noticed Em’s intense frown. “What is it now?” Eryn waited for the other shoe to drop, which it did without fail for her these days.

“Something isn’t right. You’re showing and only returned three months ago. The Primarian you mated with briefly is the father, isn’t he?”

Dear God, not this again. She wanted to scream but knew it wouldn’t go over well with her C.O. “I met a local man at a bar when I got back. It isn’t something I’m proud of, but there you have it.”

“Mmhmm,” she hummed, her gazed fixed on her belly.

“I remember my mother saying she got as big as a house when carrying me. I was over ten pounds. My brother weighed in a few ounces more, which is something I’m dreading, believe me.”

Hiding a grimace, though not well, Emily nodded. “I’ll notify personnel and get you reassigned.”

“Please, Em. We’re preparing for integration. Nothing major is going on. Except for routine training, my squad hasn’t been called up because of our assignment here. And I wanted to be involved with the new colony.”

“Do you plan to head into space with an infant? In which service branch and what universe?” she shot back. “Or were you planning to give it up?”

“No,” Eryn started, stunned. Adoption hadn’t ever been an option on the table. Agreeing wholeheartedly, her little one kicked hard beneath her hand. “I haven’t decided what I’m doing yet, other than I’m keeping the baby.”

“You need to talk to someone, make some decisions, and come up with a plan for your career. Going it alone will be tough, Eryn. If you’re called up, who will care for your baby? Could the father—?”

“No, he’s not in the picture,” she murmured. The same questions had spun around in her head.

“Perhaps a civilian life might suit you better.”

“Doing what?”

“Security. There’s a big need for it with all the conflict in the world. Or you’d make an excellent trainer. God knows you’ve got the skills. Or, if you want something more stable, with an inside track to the colony down the road. I hear good things about your work with EPIC. That program will continue for years, if not decades.”

Eryn couldn’t comprehend how her life and all she’d planned had changed so abruptly, but Emily had a point. With a child, she had to consider other options than the military.

“Look,” she continued, “I understand. Shit happens and gets in the way of what you plan for your life. When it does, you just have to roll with the changes and make the best of it.”

She scowled, unconvinced. “If you’re saying to take my lemons and make lemonade. I hate lemonade.”

With a grunt that sounded half-amused and half-sympathetic, Em patted her on the shoulder. “Think about what I’ve said. I’ll consider the options and get your new assignment to you by tomorrow.”

“Yes, ma’am.” Her reply was by rote response when she really wanted to curse her shitty luck or, even better, cry.

“I’m sorry, Eryn.”

“Me, too, Em. And thanks for your concern. I mean it, this time.”

---

With her mother-to-be status outted, things moved swiftly. By 0800 the following morning, she had a new assignment. It came with an office on the second floor of the Personnel Service Center, and smack dab in the middle of it sat her nemesis in the form of a double-pedestal, seven-drawer, standard-issue desk complete with inbox and pencil holder. It had all the bells and whistles—climate controlled, integrated voice command, and a high-back, cushy chair with a seat wide enough to accommodate her ever-broadening hips. Anyone else would be happy being out of the sun, the heat, and, with all the storms in recent weeks, the mud. Not Eryn, mostly because she didn’t have a choice which made it more difficult to take.

She’d barely had time to take it all in before Major Aldridge’s face appeared on her new desktop vid-screen.

“Lockwood. Excellent,” came Emily’s version of good morning through the speakers. “I pulled a few strings and am pleased to say your comprehensive medical exam is scheduled with Captain Juna at 0900 today.”

Startled by her inappropriate meddling, she gaped at her.

“Look alive, Chief. That’s in fifteen minutes.”

“Major, I appreciate your concern, but I can see to this myself.”

“Yet you haven’t,” Emily stated succinctly while staring pointedly at her from the screen. “So, I made sure it would be done and arranged it for you.”

“I can’t believe… We go way back, but this? It’s…it’s…” Eryn sputtered, so incensed at her meddling C.O. she couldn’t think straight. “This is an unbelievable privacy violation.”

“Shut it, Eryn. I didn’t say why you needed to be seen. That would be a violation.”

“You’re walking a fine line, ma’am.”

“Yes, between command and friendship. Your superior is having you reassigned; your old friend is worried and made the appointment.”

She had too many powerful friends, she decided, but her anger dissipated at her concern. She needed to see a doctor, regardless.

“You have to do this, Eryn.”

“I know, Em.”

“Good. So you’ll be there, on time, and fully disclose your status.”

“Who’s talking now? The friend or the major?”

“Both. Do it. No more debate. You have your orders, Chief.”

She had to laugh. “I see how it is. You can take the friend out of the major, but not the major out of the friend.”

Emily ignored her comment, though her lips curved up a bit. “With all this discussion, you’ve cut your window to eleven minutes. You better get your ass in gear.”

“Yes, ma’am,” she replied, accepting the inevitable, but Emily had already disconnected, leaving Eryn staring at an empty screen, feeling like she’d been run over by a tank with a vanity tag that read Major Pain-in-the-Butt.

Ten minutes later, she sat in a stark, cold exam room which smelled of disinfectant, wearing a thin disposable gown, sans panties and bra.

The air came on, shooting an icy blast through the vent above her head. She shifted on the hard, vinyl table and carefully tucked the end of her flimsy gown under her rear end, as she waited with waning patience for Juna to return.

Watching the old-fashioned wall clock, she frowned when the hands never seemed to move. Out of sheer boredom, she began to count. She reached sixty for the third time and could swear the minute hand hadn’t so much as twitched. If she was wrong, and it somehow kept accurate time, it meant she’d been waiting for an hour.

What was taking so long?

She’d already confessed the truth to Juna, who, once over her initial shock, lectured her on the importance of prenatal care and the risks of delaying it well into her second trimester. This had led to a heated discussion, Eryn insisting she was only three months along, and Juna guessing more like six months.

Eryn argued, of course, repeating her date of conception, while giving minimal details of her drunken, stupid, one-night stand with Brett. Or was it Chet? Or Brian?

She’d closed her eyes and groaned at that point, silently calling herself a slut for being unsure of her baby’s father’s name.

---

Then she’d been weighed—the sight of the scale climbing higher than ever before, most unpleasant—measured, poked and prodded, including giving up four vials of blood and peeing in a cup.

Then, daring her to move a muscle until she got back, Juna had left her.

She’d been waiting, wondering, and worrying ever since, and was starting to get hungry.

In silent support, the baby kicked.

Reflexively, her hands came up and pressed against the place below her ribs, her baby’s favorite spot to jab her with a heel or an elbow. As her palms slowly circled the mound that grew bigger by the day, she agreed with Lana, Emily, and now Juna, she seemed huge. No way did she look three months along.

“If you’re a boy, you’ll be big like your uncle Jacob, I bet.”

Her younger brother had taken after their father. Still a kid when she’d last seen him, he already topped six feet four and weighed at least two hundred forty pounds. She wasn’t petite by any measure, but when he’d hugged her tight while seeing him off at the airport for his deployment, the top of her head fit right under his chin. If her baby took after Jake, it would be tall, ginger-haired, with stunning azure eyes.

Eryn prayed for it because, for her drunken one-nighter, she’d chosen a lean, hazel-eyed blond guy, shorter than her by at least two inches; the polar opposite of Ram. She hoped her child didn’t inherit too much from Chet, or was it Charles?—she was such a slut!—and become a lifelong reminder of a night she’d rather forget.

“Your daddy was a shrimp, baby,” she murmured, her hands continuing to circle. “So why do I look like I’m ready to pop any day?”

Muffled voices in the hall drew her gaze to the door. When it opened and Juna walked in, relief changed to irritation as Ellar, one of the Primarian physics, entered behind her.

“What is he doing here?” she blurted out. “I told you it can’t be a Primarian child, so he has no business here.”

“I know, Eryn,” Juna answered patiently. “You’ve said so many times.”

“Then why did you bring him with you?”

“Because this isn’t adding up.”

“What do you mean? I gave you the date of conception. All I need is prenatal vitamins and I’ll be back in a few months for a checkup.”

“You don’t have a few months, young woman.”

Tired from the long wait and annoyed with the entire proceedings, she scowled at the man. “Why are you still here?”

“Don’t be rude, Eryn,” Juna scolded. “I requested he be here.”

“Why?”

“Because I’m convinced the child is Ram’s.”

“It can’t be,” she snapped. “We didn’t bond. I told you that onboard ship.”

“And I told you nothing about human-Primarian interspecies breeding is as expected.”

“But the tests all came back negative. You ran them yourself. And besides, Primarians can’t breed with an incompatible mate, which we were.”

“What’s this?” Ellar appeared bewildered and began tapping on his tablet. After a few moments, he nodded. “Greater than 99 percent, a very strong match.”

“You need to update your computer, doc. The initial results were reported incorrectly. I saw the notification sent to Ram about the error. It had incompatible marked in big bold print.”

“Compatibility ratings are never flawed. And if a mistake was made, which would be the first time, ever, I’m positive notification wouldn’t come by written notice.” He scoffed at the notion, his lips twisting as if offended by the mere suggestion.

“But I saw it myself,” she repeated, her voice rising in volume.

“This is most irregular.” Ellar reply was low, as if to himself, while he stroked his snowy beard. “We haven’t had an error in my lifetime. Further, we have protocols for the handling of discrepancies. It is done by face-to-face consultation with the physic, and if an error is suspected, per protocol, retesting would have occurred.”

“You’re certain?” Juna asked.

His head came up sharply, and he met her gaze straight on as he answered. “Jarlan would have someone’s head over such slapdash mismanagement of data and violation of protocols.”

“I’m confused,” Eryn stated. “What are the odds of three false pregnancy tests and a reporting error on the same patient?”

“Slim to none,” her doctor replied. “I have to assume they were somehow tampered with.”

“It’s a possibility we need to consider, yes.”

Following all of this in disbelief, Eryn exclaimed, “But I took those tests onboard Odyssey. Who would do such a thing, and why?”

“That’s harder to explain.” The older man’s face tightened with anger. “With what’s going on in Ariad, with the Purists and their plots, I wouldn’t be surprised if they had a hand in this. Not one bit. I must report this new information to Jarlan, which is a call I don’t relish making.”

“You think someone tried to interfere with Eryn and Ram’s mating.”

“It seems that way, yes,” Ellar concurred.

Eryn felt more than saw Juna’s focus shift, watching her patient’s reaction. She was on edge, for certain, a jumble of butterflies in her stomach, but all she managed to do was whisper, “This is insane.”

“The only one who needs more convincing is you,” Juna told her gently. “Consider the other facts. Most women don’t feel the baby kick until their second trimester. Yet you felt the first strong kick weeks ago. There is also the weight gain, which is a concern if you’re early on as you claim, but expected toward the end of your term. And, the date of conception doesn’t correspond with your measurements, but it does if we consider Ram is the father.”

“Which would make you twenty-five weeks gestation,” Ellar interjected, “and if this pregnancy follows the shorter Primarian term of seven months, you will deliver in three to four weeks.”

She shook her head, having a hard time accepting anything with so many contradictory facts. “How do you explain the rest? I’m sitting here without any markings or evidence of a transformation, and, aside from the symptoms I had on the ship which you told me yourself could have been a stomach virus, I’ve had no signs of separation sickness since arriving back on Earth, which should tell you it isn’t a possibility, either.”

The two medical professionals shared a knowing glance which Eryn couldn’t have missed if she’d been blindfolded.

“What was that?” she demanded. “What aren’t you telling me?”

“We think,” Juna began then stopped and gestured toward Ellar. “You should probably explain. It’s your theory.”

“Oh, I can’t take the credit. Our lead physic agrees it is possible. We’ll need more extensive study to prove my hypothesis true—”

“Will someone please tell me what you’re talking about before I go nuts?” Eryn shouted.

Both doctors turned and stared at her.

“Tell her,” Juna demanded, and the older man took a hesitant step forward.

“We have been in consult this last hour with Jarlan, on Primaria. As Juna mentioned, none of the matings are holding true to course, and we have had several anomalies.”

“And you’re saying I’m one of these anomalies?”

He paused, sending Juna a sidelong glance. She, in turn, hesitated to respond, both seeming suddenly uneasy.

“Just spit it out,” Eryn insisted of Ellar.

He cleared his throat then he did. “Some of the new pairs have bonded, including sets of fated mates, without visible signs until late.”

“Six months after separation late?” she pressed.

“Well, no, but none have been pregnant.”

“And this changes things how?”

“We think, if the child you are carrying is indeed Primarian, the baby may be giving you protection from the sickness.”

“What?” she gasped, dread washing over her.

“Hear him out, Eryn.” Juna laid a hand on her shoulder and squeezed.

“We believe,” Ellar continued, “since the baby carries the father’s biocellular construct—”

“What we call DNA,” Juna added.

“Right, right.” The alien physic nodded. “With the baby possessing the father’s DNA, we think it may be enough to minimize or possibly nullify any symptoms, in theory.”

“No!” she whispered, shaking her head. “Ram can’t be…”

She closed her eyes, remembering their last meeting. He’d come to see her in the med-bay, demanding to know if she suffered separation sickness. When she’d emphatically denied it, blaming a virus or the flu, with no other connection between them, he’d left. Well rid of her, he’d stopped at the door to impart one final chilling remark.

“Maker willing, for your sake, our paths won’t cross again in the future.”

He’d been so angry. If this turned out to be true, which seemed to be the case, he would think she had betrayed him again, keeping their child from him with more lies.

“We didn’t part on good terms,” she murmured. “And he requested the elder council to dissolve us, or whatever the process is for such a thing, and they approved. He won’t want this if it’s true.”

The Primarian physic flushed red and adamantly shook his head. “You underestimate Master Ram. If he is the father, he will be overjoyed, no matter what has come between you before this. And the term you are referring to is dissolution. To my knowledge, that did not occur.”

She glanced at Ellar, shock locking the air in her chest. “Are you certain? I was told otherwise.”

“Someone was misinformed, perhaps?”

“Why wouldn’t he go through with it? He went home months ago.”

“No, Eryn, he remained here at Roth’s request.”

Her gaze shot to the door as a familiar voice joined the conversation. Maggie, who she hadn’t heard enter, stood in the open doorway. Behind her, Commander Roth, tall and intimidating as ever, had his intense purple gaze locked on her.

“Doesn’t anyone knock anymore?” she snapped. If the commander knew, he would tell Ram. “And whatever happened to confidentiality?”

“I called her,” Juna confessed. “You have her listed as an emergency contact. I thought you might need her support.”

“How long have you been standing there?”

“Long enough,” Maggie whispered.

Looking pointedly at Eryn, Roth’s response was precise. “Back to the statement ‘if Master Ram is the father’.”

“Great,” she murmured, aiming a scowl Juna’s way. “Maybe a front-page headline would have told everyone on the base.” Then something Maggie said sunk in. She glanced at her seeking clarification. “What do you mean he remained here? Ram’s on Earth?”

“He’s here on the base,” Roth clarified. “He is an integral member of the integration team. I’m amazed your paths haven’t crossed in all this time.”

With her pulse pounding in her ears, she didn’t hear anything after here on the base. In fact, with her heart racing so hard, she could hardly hear herself think. A sudden sense of being closed in came over her. “Well, this has been loads of fun.” She scooted to the edge of the exam table. “But, I need to get dressed and go.”

“I know this is a lot to take in, honey,” Juna acknowledged kindly, “however, we’re not quite finished. There is one more definitive test. It’s the other reason I brought Ellar with me. The test needs to be done in the lab on the Intrepid.”

“It will not require you to transport up in person,” he explained. “I’ll only need a cell sample. It will determine with 100 percent accuracy if Ram is the father.”

“From me or the baby?”

“The child.”

Her hands flew protectively to her belly. “How?”

“It will require a minor needle prick.”

“Yeah,” she drawled. “It’s not happening today. I’m done. I need time to let all of this sink in.”

“I’m afraid you don’t have time for that, Eryn,” Roth informed her quietly. “Ram is scheduled to leave for Primaria tomorrow. You’ll need to tell him immediately because this changes everything.”

Tears stung her eyes, something unfamiliar to her until Ram. She averted her eyes, staring down at her clenched hands, not wanting to reveal her weakness to anyone. “I don’t want him to know,” she whispered.

“I’m sorry, if this child is Ram’s, you don’t get to make the decision. I won’t allow you to keep his son’s existence from him,” Roth murmured.

“Or his daughter,” Maggie added.

“Maker be praised if this is true,” her mate replied in a voice barely above a whisper while Ellar nodded in agreement. “A female birth would be a rare gift to Primaria.”

“Excuse me if I’m not thinking about gifts to Primaria. This is my baby. Are you telling me I have no say?” Her hoarse voice, rising with her anxiety, dried her throat.

“Not under the treaty, Eryn.” Maggie’s sympathy for her plight rang in the gruffness of her voice. “I’m so sorry, honey. I know you had a hard time with Ram, but surely you can resolve the problem.”

She looked up, a single hot tear tracking down her cheek. “He hates me, Maggie.”

“I’m sure that’s not true.” Her concerned gaze flicked to Roth.

“If this is his child, it means you are mates. Ram will be thrilled, and he’ll set aside whatever barriers drove you apart.”

Roth’s confidence didn’t reassure Eryn. Only she and Ram knew what had passed between them and how abhorrent it was.

“No.” Her voice broke as the memories swept through her, and guilt at her actions made her stomach clench. “What I did… I haven’t been able to forgive myself, so how can I expect him to?” She hopped down from the table, in flight mode. “I must go.”

“Eryn, we have one more test,” Juna repeated.

“No more tests.”

“I’m afraid we have to know.” Roth’s calm tone rang with authority. “And under the treaty, if we suspect a child may be Primarian, we have the right to insist on testing to determine the truth.”

“I don’t care about the damn treaty,” she snapped, forgetting her training and the respect due to a superior officer. “This is my body and my baby. And that, as they say, is that! End of discussion.”

“I’m sorry, Eryn.” Roth’s voice remained firm with a gentleness underlying the steel. “Only half of what you say is true. If the child is Primarian, he is Ram’s under the law.”

Icy dread spread through her chest at the thought of her child being ripped from her arms and taken across the galaxies. “This is Earth, not primeval Primaria. I have rights. I can fight this.”

“You could,” Maggie agreed, “but you would lose, honey.”

“There is something else you’re forgetting, Eryn,” Juna interjected.

“What else?”

“The protection the baby gives you? We aren’t sure—”

“Aren’t sure of what?” she snapped, all patience gone.

“What will happen after you deliver,” Ellar answered for her. “If his or her DNA is keeping you free from the sickness, it could all change after the birth. If you and Master Warrior Ramikin are indeed mates—”

“You could get sick,” Maggie told her. “If you’re fated mates, and you separate, you would both die. What would become of your precious baby?”

“So like me, he has no choice. If he despises me and can’t bear to look at me, he’s stuck with me forever, upon risk of illness or death. Is this what you’re telling me?”

The blows, coming one after another, were far too much for Eryn to endure. Her knees buckled, and she staggered backward, Roth rushing forward to catch her before she fell.

“Ram’s a good man, Eryn,” the commander assured her as he took her weight. “You can trust him to take care of you and your child.”

“That’s just it.” Her quavering, defeated tone underscored her misery. “After what I did, I don’t think I can.”

“Eryn, what on Earth?” Maggie exclaimed. “What could be so bad?”

She shook her head, too ashamed to speak of her actions, let alone reveal it her longtime friend, a woman she respected.

“Do your damned test,” she told Juna and Ellar. “I suppose I can’t move forward until my fate…” Her hands swept over her stomach. “Until our fate is known.”

---

Juna raised the head of the exam table, letting Eryn sit up more comfortable. She also removed the sensors from her belly and switched off the monitor tracking her baby’s heartbeat. A constant companion for the past several hours, she missed the steady rhythm already.

“How’re you doing, Eryn?” She gave her hand a little squeeze.

“In general, I’d say being a patient sucks.”

The squeeze became a consoling pat. “Get used to this. We’ll be checking you often from now on.”

“I can hardly wait,” she grumbled as she adjusted the thin paper drape over her belly for maximum coverage.

“Don’t cover up yet,” Juna directed, holding up a handheld censor. “Don’t worry. This one won’t hurt a bit.”

“Famous last words from the woman who stuck a six-inch needle into my abdomen less than an hour ago. And Ellar, with his internal exam. Next time—if there must be a next time—you do it. His hands are freakin’ huge.”

“I’m sorry, Eryn. The technology is his; therefore, he had to collect the samples.”

“What’s taking him so long, by the way?”

She glanced at the clock. “He said he’d return in one time cycle, which is equivalent to one Earth hour, so we have four minutes left to wait, give or take.”

“Let’s hope it’s not give. I’ve been here long enough. Not that I don’t enjoy your company and your lovely amenities.” She swept her hand down her body indicating the crinkled blue paper gown.

Juna shook her head, although her mouth kicked up on one end in a half grin as she moved the wand over her belly. “Hush for a moment, so my scanner’s audio can lock onto your baby.”

In seconds, the swishing background noises settled into a rapid lub-dub rhythm.

“That’s her?” Eryn gasped.

“Or him.” Juna grinned. “If you look at the screen on the wall to your right, you’ll also see little him or her.”

Her head whipped around so fast, a sharp pain stabbed her in the bend of her neck. But she didn’t care once she saw the 3-D color image of her baby.

“He’s so small,” she whispered, blinking back tears. It all became very real in that moment. Fixated by the computerized likeness of her little one, she found herself laughing and crying at the same time. “He’s like a wizened old man.”

While watching his legs kick on screen, she felt the movement against her belly. And she fell in love the next moment when his thumb found his mouth and he began sucking.

“He’s amazing, isn’t he, Juna?”

“Absolutely, though I can’t vouch for him being a he.”

“It’s a girl? How can you tell? Her legs are crossed.”

“That’s what I mean, the image is inconclusive. Ellar should be able to determine the gender after his analysis is complete, if you want to know.”

“Certainly,” the physic acknowledged, seeming to appear out of nowhere. “Our test is sensitive and can give specific details right down to the eye color.”

“You’re back,” Eryn whispered. As she studied the older man’s face, trying to glean the answer, her heart felt like it would burst out of her chest. “You know?”

“I do.” His tone, his facial expression, his body language didn’t tell her anything. The man would be unbeatable in a game of five-card draw.

Breathing in deep, Eryn blew the air out bit by bit, hoping to relieve some of her tension. It did no good. She doubted anything would, ever again.

Okay, she was being a bit over-the-top, but it was well-deserved today, of all days.

“Lay it on me,” she told him. “I can’t stand anymore waiting.”

“Master Ramikin is without a doubt the father of your child.”

Although deep down she’d suspected, especially in the past few weeks when her belly had grown so fast, yet her long-ingrained denial had been difficult to overcome. “You’re sure? It’s not going to end up a false negative like the pregnancy tests on the Odyssey?”

Ellar frowned at her. “While I can’t vouch for the exactness of your human tests, mine are accurate.”

“Unless you count your flawed compatibility tests.”

“That is still up for debate, young woman.”

“How is this possible?” she whispered. She looked from Ellar, who had turned away and was watching moving images of her baby on the screen with interest, back to Juna, her trusted physician and friend.

“The reality is we don’t know. Each bonding appears different, the same as each transformation.”

“So, pretty much, we’re lost in the woods without a compass or a map. We’d make really bad Girl Scouts.”

“I don’t understand the last reference,” the alien physic stated, “however, you are correct about one thing. No one knows what to expect. Like the matings, we are meticulously studying all the variances with the pregnancies.”

Great, being studied at all sounded bad, but meticulously so was bound to be a real blast. “Do you have any idea why things have been so inconsistent?”

“Bringing two different species together will always involve unknown variables and new challenges, but in our case, Jarlan has a theory. You Earth females are very independent. Much more so than our women. And, considering the circumstances surrounding the first matings, volatile emotions have been involved. Take Eva, for example. She was determined to save your people and resisted the joining. It wasn’t until after she realized she loved Kerr and accepted him that she transformed. Except for you and Eva, the other captives yielded more readily to their mates. Those six transformed right away.”

“Except for Lana. Hers didn’t stick. She transformed, but changed back again.”

“I haven’t figured Lana’s situation out yet,” Juna chimed in. “And she refuses to come in and talk to me. She’s stubborn like someone else I know.”

A shroud of uncertainty hung over her, and dread for the inevitable confrontation with Ram loomed ahead—something she preferred to avoid as long as possible, which wouldn’t be allowed if the commander had a say in it. “What about Maggie and Roth?”

“What of them?” Juna switched off the device, and the image of her baby froze on the screen.

“How come they didn’t sicken while apart?”

“Another pair of fated mates whose joining was unconventional.” Ellar took the scanner from Juna, examining it. “Their breaching didn’t occur in the usual fashion.” He glanced up. “I mean, usual with, um, penetration.”

“He means it began with oral sex,” Juna supplied in a stage whisper, which prompted the other doctor’s face to flush crimson.

“It came down to the sharing of DNA through there, well, uh…” The man became flustered as he struggled with the subject of sex despite being an expert in both science and medicine. Although she couldn’t summon a shred of amusement herself, Juna was grinning out right. “Well, yes.” He dabbed at his damp brow. “I didn’t mention that their unconventional bonding was followed by a delayed transformation. The captain didn’t obtain Roth’s mark until after she accepted him as her mate.”

“Then Ram and I could remain unmated if we don’t accept one another?”

“Eryn, you carry his child, and you’ve told me you dream of him. Those could be mate dreams.”

“What are those?”

Juna again deferred to Ellar to explain.

“Our females often dream about the male who will be their mate. Not always, but it occurs most in those who have a particularly cogent bond.”

With a pang of disappointment, she glanced down at where her hands curved over her belly. “Then mine aren’t mate dreams because, A, we aren’t a good match. B, we didn’t bond with a regular breeching, which I’ve repeatedly told you. And C, we made each other miserable.”

“But your situation was extraordinary. Because of the capture, you couldn’t focus on anything aside from your mission.” She gave her shoulder a reassuring squeeze. “This time, with the alliance between our people and working for a common good, it might be different. And don’t forget, together, you have a child on the way.”

“I might come to accept him, but I don’t see any way the reverse could be possible.” Her gaze cut to the physic. “Is it conceivable I could bond and he doesn’t?”

“A partial bonding?” Ellar stroked his bearded chin. “It is plausible, I suppose. It seems anything is these days. We would have to be certain it wasn’t complete. The commander didn’t show signs of sickness until he had proof—in their case, seeing Maggie had transformed and acquired his marking. They are fated mates separated for days. She became ill, yet he never did. There is a risk the same could be true for you and Master Ram until we know for sure.”

“This is true,” Juna agreed. “And is why I am recommending extreme caution after the delivery. You are going to have to work this out with him, Eryn.”

“I don’t want to be with him if he doesn’t want me, if he only wants our child.”

“Earth matings have been based on less, I’ve been told,” Ellar observed gravely.

“Yes,” Eryn exclaimed. “Throughout history, there have been marriages of convenience and unions based on money and power. Many of those ended up in bitter divorce, broken homes and absentee parents, and a long-ago war. The common denominator in them all? Misery for the couple.”

“By the Maker.” Ellar exhaled, with a slow shake of his head. “Your society does have a capricious past.”

As she closed her eyes, she imagined her child growing up in a cold home, with parents always at odds. She wanted a love like her mother and father shared, brief as it was, and the joy their happiness brought to her life, and she wanted the same for her child. “This is bad because I don’t think marriage—rather mating—is meant for me.”

“Is the alternative for you?” Juna countered. “What if you have partially bonded, and, after the baby is born, he leaves, taking your baby with him.”

“He wouldn’t!” Eryn cried.

“You don’t think, after all we’ve been through, he would consider leaving his child here?” Ellar exclaimed, his usually calm voice rising an octave. “The notion is inconceivable for one of our males.”

“And you must think about what could happen if you are partially bonded, and he is not.” Juna paused long enough to grip her hand. “You could die, Eryn, and your baby would be without a mother. You have to think this through.”

“You forget, if he takes it away, my child wouldn’t have a mother anyway, Juna.”

“This conversation is a waste of time. A Primarian warrior would never abandon his mate, much less the mother of his child,” Ellar barked.

So, her choice became misery or potential death.

On this ominous note, she swung her legs over the side of the table. “Can I go now?”

“Yes, but you’re progressing so fast, I’ll want to see you in a week. You need to stay hydrated and eat properly. Controlled weight gain, nutrition, sleep, all impact the growth and development of your child, and are very important until delivery.”

“I understand.” She moved toward the little anteroom where she’d left her clothes.

“What are you going to do?”

“I don’t know, Juna. I need time to think.”

“You have about three more weeks,” Ellar advised.

“Please don’t do anything rash,” her friend urged.

She didn’t make any promises as she closed the door between them.

In a daze, her brain swirling with the possibilities, she somehow dressed, left the clinic, and, before she knew how she’d gotten there, stood on her front steps. The notion she could have stepped into oncoming traffic and wouldn’t have had a clue until too late gave her a momentary fright. With leaden feet and a heavy heart, she slogged up the stairs of her three-story walk-up.