“I’m going,” I said.

It was automatic. And it wasn’t a request. It was a statement. I was going in there, no matter what.

Nathan nodded. He had undoubtedly expected me to volunteer. I needed answers on what had happened to Juno, and I felt fairly confident that they would be in those mysterious woods between the factory towns.

I was slightly surprised at the ease I had in volunteering. I was expecting someone to put up more of a fight, since it seemed like everyone was trying to volunteer themselves. But instead, Nelson, Jackie, Gabby, Ant, Abe, Kory, and Jace were looking at me in quiet support. They knew why I needed to go.

“Then we just need one more,” Nathan said resolutely. “We can’t send in too many, but we’ll need more than just the one.”

“I’m going,” Jace echoed me.

“Wait,” Jackie started.

Ant and Abe also looked primed to speak. I could tell that this bid was going to be more of an argument. But before anyone had the chance to talk over Jace, Nathan raised his hand to signal silence and shook his head.

“Not you, Jace,” Nathan said.

Jace’s eyes grew wide, and he stuttered slightly before he found the words to argue. “But… But why? Why not me?” he asked.

“We’re going to keep our volunteers as safe as we possibly can. But this is a dangerous mission. And there’s a reason that we’re sending in two volunteers as opposed to just one,” Nathan said.

We were quiet after Nathan spoke. I thought we all knew what he was going to say next, but we waited to hear him actually say it.

“If someone gets hurt or captured, the other person will have to leave them behind. Otherwise the mission will be a bust. At least one person has to bring information out to us,” Nathan finished.

I quickly looked around at my team. Was there a single person here whom I could leave behind if I had to? Could I leave an injured Nelson or a captured and endangered Jackie? How on earth would I leave behind Ant or Abe or Kory? Suddenly I felt very sick. That wasn’t what I wanted to sign on for, but I couldn’t argue with the reasoning for it.

“And Jace, I just don’t think you could leave Robin behind,” Nathan finished.

Jace’s eyes were still wide with confusion and hurt. But he was silent.

“I’m guessing I won’t be able to volunteer,” Nelson said questioningly.

Nathan nodded. “I need you on my tech team. We’ll have our own mission providing support for Robin and the other volunteer.”

“Then I’d like to go,” Jackie said.

But before Nathan could respond, another voice was arguing.

“You’re still recovering!” Ant shot across the table at Jackie. “You can’t go putting yourself in more danger. I should go.”

“Why you? I think I should go,” Abe interrupted.

“I want to go,” Kory said strongly.

Nathan put his hand up again. “We’re going to have to come to a consensus here,” he said with a tinge of frustration in his voice.

“I vote for Kory,” Jace said suddenly.

We all turned to look at him.

“Well, unless someone else can come up with two votes, I guess that settles it then,” Nathan said.

No one spoke. I looked over at Jace, but he was still looking straight ahead at Nathan.

“All right, then. Looks like it’ll be Robin and Kory,” Nathan said.

Kory looked at me and nodded in a show of solidarity.

“Mission team, we will meet again in the morning to discuss identities and the drop-off plan to get you into Dry River,” Nathan continued.

“Shouldn’t we start talking about that now?” I asked. I trusted Nathan, which meant I trusted any timeline that he considered appropriate, but I couldn’t imagine focusing on anything else today. I wanted to go ahead and get the planning out of the way for this new mission.

“Unfortunately, we just don’t have the information yet. I’ll have to give Aurora your name, Robin, so she can reassign your fingerprints in the government systems. Kory, since you don’t have a scanning ID, you can stay behind after this meeting so we can take fingerprints to send to Aurora,” Nathan said.

My face must’ve showcased the reticence I was feeling.

“Robin, try to enjoy yourself today. Spend time with your friends. Eat good food. Get some rest. There will be time to finish our planning tomorrow before you and Kory set off,” Nathan said.

I felt like I understood what he was really saying, even though he had left it out. Enjoy yourself today, Robin, because there might not be a tomorrow. But then he was turning back to his computers and calling for Kory. The meeting was adjourned.

I turned to leave with the rest of the group. Before we exited the building, I looked back at Kory. I didn’t know him as well as the rest of the team, but we would need to put our utmost trust in each other if we were going to have any chance of making it out of Helping Hands’ custody alive.

We filed through the halls and stepped out onto the streets of Edgewood. Before anyone could speak, Jackie had lobbed a powerful punch at Ant’s shoulder.

“What was that for?” Ant sputtered.

“I’m not some delicate flower, Ant! I don’t need you to advocate for me,” she said bitingly.

“Well, excuse me for wanting you to be safe,” Ant snapped back, slightly hurt.

“I wanted to be there for Robin,” Jackie said in return. She looked at me.

“Robin will be okay,” Jace interjected. “Kory will be there.”

I looked over at him suspiciously. Was that why he had supported Kory’s mission bid? To have someone look after me? The thought miffed me. I was a big girl who could handle herself. Besides, would Kory really be able to leave me behind if he needed to, knowing how much it would hurt Jace? I worried suddenly about whether Kory was the best choice for the mission.

“What do you think you’ll find in there, Robin?” Gabby asked.

“I don’t know,” I said honestly. I was afraid to really consider it aloud yet, since so much was hanging in the balance for me. But I was ready to find out.

We got back to the dorms in time for lunch, but I wasn’t hungry. Instead, I felt like taking a long walk through Edgewood to calm my mind.

“Suit yourself!” Abe said as he bounded toward the buffet line.

Jackie and Ant followed after him.

“Want some company?” Nelson asked.

Gabby nodded beside her in a show of solidarity.

“You guys go ahead and eat. I’ll catch up with you later,” I told them. I turned to walk back out of the dining hall, with Jace close on my heels.

“You can eat lunch, you know,” I said teasingly to him.

“I’d rather be with you,” he responded with a soft smile.

And honestly, I was happy to have his company. When Jace had volunteered back in the tech room, I was secretly hoping he’d be selected. I felt comfortable when I was alone with Jace, and I felt safe in his presence. But it was for the best that he wasn’t coming. I couldn’t imagine either of us being able to leave the other behind. Although, I wasn’t sure I’d be able to leave Kory behind, either. I preferred to think that we’d both get out safely, even if that wasn’t a guarantee.

Jace and I walked along the main street, away from Edgewood’s dorms and buildings, toward the verdant tree line. We both traveled there wordlessly, drawn to the same comforts that we had experienced in our previous lives before Edgewood. The woods reminded me of my home out in the trees, and of the wolves I had felt a kinship with. And I knew the woods brought back memories of home for Jace as well.

“It’s going to be hard for me when you leave,” he said softly when we reached the tree cover.

The sweet smell of pine needles was perfuming the thin air around us, and I took a deep breath to put myself at ease before I responded.

“It’s going to be hard for me to leave you,” I said.

I stopped and turned to face him. His eyes were pensive and fraught as they met mine.

“Do you think you’ll find your mother in there?” he asked.

I thought hard about the question. I wanted to find her, of course, and I knew that there was a chance that she was there. But I was sick of getting my hopes up only to have them dashed. The recent news about my father and about Hope’s adoptive mother was still painful to consider. I didn’t want to set myself up to be hurt again.

“I don’t know,” I answered. “But I know that there’s a chance she’s in there. And that’s enough for me.”

We walked to the outer perimeter of Edgewood, beside the wavy and glittery dome of projection that was keeping us hidden. Everything was green and fresh and beautiful out here in these unblemished woods. If only it could be like that everywhere. If only Juno and Culver could’ve lived in a place like this instead of the pollution-heavy factory town where I had been born.

Jace reached down to hold my hand as we strolled along the projection wall. I felt peaceful and reflective as we walked hand in hand. And then it struck me at once how through everything—Trenton, running from the government, Edgewood, even when we were back in my hometown of Millville—being near Jace had felt like home to me.

“I didn’t ever expect to feel this way about anyone, you know,” he said abruptly.

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“Well… back home,” he continued, “there weren’t very many of us. And I remember thinking that if I never got married or had kids, that would be okay with me. All I needed was my family. And I liked my freedom, anyway.”

I squeezed his hand as he spoke.

“And when I lost most of my family, I became even more certain that I’d never start a family of my own,” he said with downcast eyes. “Because I never wanted to risk the pain of losing someone I loved again.”

I looked over at him as we walked, but he continued to stare down at his feet.

“But when I met you, it felt different. Like suddenly I could see my life going in a different direction,” he continued. “I guess what I’m trying to say is… thank you. Thank you for reminding me that it’s okay to love, and it’s okay to be afraid, and it’s okay to feel both of those things at once.”

I stopped in my tracks and pulled him toward me. There were many things that I wanted to say to him. I wanted to tell him that I felt the same way, that I was also afraid of losing him, and that was why I had been dragging my feet in our relationship. I wanted to tell him that I was going to make it home and that we would be together after this mission. I wanted to tell him that it was all going to be okay, and that I understood. But instead I said something else.

“I love you,” I said. And the strength of my voice when I said it surprised me. I really did love Jace.

“Robin,” he said, his eyes brimming with tears. “Robin, I love you, too.”

Then he twirled his fingers into my hair and pulled me into his embrace. There was no hesitancy or shyness in our kiss this time. We connected hungrily, our mouths opening to feel more of each other, our hands grasping tighter and tighter. I felt my knees weaken, but it only provided me more resolve to press against Jace and lose myself in the moment.

We stayed together, fused as one, for long minutes, until finally we pulled back and began to walk back toward Edgewood and our team and friends.

The sky in Edgewood was growing duskier and the air was cooler by the time we reached the dorms. We glanced into the dining hall but didn’t see our team, so we continued up to my dorm instead, assuming they were in the unofficial Team Hood headquarters.

I was surprised to find my dorm empty as well. Nelson had left a note on my bed.

Robin, Gabby asked me to stay with her tonight to talk tech. I’ll see you before you set off tomorrow. Love, Nelson

I smiled at the thought. Gabby was probably talking Nelson’s ear off right now at their slumber party.

“Just you tonight?” Jace asked.

I shrugged. “Guess so.”

I leaned back on my bed and started slipping off my boots.

Jace shifted his weight uncomfortably, as if he was waiting for me to speak again.

“Are you all right?” I asked him.

He blushed. “Just getting nervous about tomorrow morning.”

I looked up at him. It was hard to imagine such a strong, intimidating figure getting nervous about anything. But if ever there was an appropriate time for that, it was now.

“Jace?” I asked timidly.

“Yes?” he replied.

My heart began to race. Jace and I probably wouldn’t get another chance like this for some time. And, if the mission failed, I might not get the chance ever again.

“Would you stay with me tonight?” I asked.

I bit my lip nervously. Was I being too forward now? Would Jace be confused by this sudden ramping up in our relationship? I felt my palms getting sweaty.

“I’d love to,” he replied simply.

I released my breath and smiled. Jace no longer looked nervous or afraid. He looked strong and certain.

He stepped toward me, and I stood from my bed. His hands wound around my waist and pulled me close again, and before I knew what I was doing, my own hands began to raise his shirt at the hem. I shimmied the material up over his hips, his abs, his navel, his chest…

Jace grabbed the hem as I reached his shoulders and pulled the shirt off the rest of the way, exposing his toned chest to me. My hands ran over it, savoring the feel of his smooth skin and firm muscles.

I felt myself falling back onto my bed. And then Jace’s warm, comforting weight was upon me.

The last rays of the sun spilled into the room and over our forms as we intertwined, his hands gently roaming the backs of my thighs, his mouth making love to mine. Enjoy yourself today, I thought to myself, with Jace’s name still on my lips, because tomorrow isn’t guaranteed.