Chapter Seven
Sadie
He finishes on my breasts, and as his release drips down my belly, I suddenly find the floor fascinating. The fact that he didn’t come in my mouth tells me everything I need to know. The realization has me fighting back tears.
I’m no good at this.
Without warning, he hauls me to my feet, and his fingers sink into my hair, forcing me to look at him. “Don’t even go there, Sadie.”
“Go where?”
“To that place in your head telling you you’re not good enough. You fucking wrecked me.”
“You didn’t come in my mouth.”
“No, I didn’t. Not this time.” He brushes his thumb down my cheek. “I didn’t think you were ready yet. But trust me on this. Before we’re through, I’m going to make you swallow every last drop.”
His words shatter the rhythm of my heartbeat, sending it out of sync.
“Do you understand?” he asks, his thumb whisking across my lips like a kiss.
“Yeah.”
“Good.” He lowers his attention to my chest. “I like the idea of you wearing my cum home.” The grin he shoots me is absolutely lecherous. “It can be your trophy for the day.”
“Jesus, Ash. You’re incorrigible.”
“I think part of you already knew that, or you wouldn’t have crawled under that table last night.”
“I was drunk,” I protest, shaking my head until he pulls his hands from my hair.
“Speaking of which,” he says, taking a seat at the end of the bed, “I need to do something about that.” Before I’m able to ask him what he means, he pulls me over his lap, smearing his release all over his jeans, and brings his palm down on my ass.
“What the fuck, Ash?” The words are an indignant shrill bouncing off the walls of his room.
Smack!
My skin stings and tingles where his hand lands on my ass. And these aren’t playful swats. He’s putting a lot of strength into each smack. I can’t believe Ashton is spanking me, but what I find even more alarming is how it’s turning me on as much as it hurts.
My dignity won’t let me give in without a fight though. I struggle against his hold, my feet desperate to find purchase on solid ground again. Instead, my fight only aids him in positioning me, and I tilt headfirst toward the floor, ass rising in the air.
His strong, immovable grip keeps me from falling, and he tucks me firm against his abdomen. “Stop fighting me, Sadie. You’re getting your ass spanked whether you like it or not.”
“What gives you the right to lay your fucking hands on me?”
“Your arousal, that’s what.”
“You think this is turning me on?” I scoff, denying the heat wafting off my cheeks—above and below the waist.
“Oh, sweetheart, I know it is.”
Another slap of his palm finds its target, making me jerk atop his lap.
“Your breathing is heavy.”
Smack!
“Your body is flushed with sweat.”
Smack!
“But right here,” he says, shoving his fingers inside me, “this is all I need to know. You’re wet as hell.”
“I’m mad as hell!” Squirming on his denim-clad thighs, I let out a warning growl.
He isn’t phased by it.
His fucking fingers aren’t helping either. This is the first time he’s touched me like this, those digits stroking me to madness, turning me into a drenched mess. He’s coaxing my growling tantrum into a series of whimpering moans.
“Fucking hell, Sadie. I don’t know whether to spank you, or make you come.”
“Second option,” I gasp.
“Do you have the slightest clue why I’m doing this?”
I shake my head, beyond caring at this point. I just want his fingers deeper.
“I’m spanking you because you let that jerk get inside your head. Because you ran straight for the club and too many shots of tequila. He didn’t deserve your tears, let alone you losing your shit and putting yourself at risk.”
“Trust me,” I grind out between gritted teeth, “it won’t happen again.”
“It’d better not.” He withdraws his fingers then smacks my ass once more. “I’m glad you called me and Mandy, but let’s be honest here, Sadie. You should have called us first. That’s what friends do—they lean on each other.”
“Right now, the only thing I’m leaning on is your lap.”
His stomach vibrates with laughter, and I’m a bit disappointed when he helps me to my feet. He got me so fired up that I’m still throbbing with the need to come. He grabs my clothes off the floor and hands them to me.
“You’re sending me home?”
“Yep.” He stands tall in front of me, feet shoulder-width apart on the floor, pants still unzipped and hanging open. He’s hard again, and the realization sends a wave of heat through my limbs.
“Did I do something wrong?”
Slowly, his arms drop to his sides. “No, Sadie.”
“Then what is it?”
“I’m respecting your limits by not fucking you.”
“Oh.” I shoot a glance at the bed, imagining us in it. Naked, wrapped around each other, twisted in the sheets. Covered in sweat, because sex with Ashton would be a full body workout. He’d dominate me in every way possible, taking my body with searing passion.
Sex with him would be mind-blowing. Life changing. And I want that more than I thought I would. No guy has ever been inside of me, and suddenly, I want him to be my first more than anything—this sexy man who grew from the boy I remember from my childhood.
But then I envision our friendship bursting into flames, turning to ash in the destruction. I can almost hear the inevitable shattering of my heart.
It’s just not worth it.
As I pull my T-shirt over my head and step into my jeans, I know deep down that keeping a certain amount of distance between us is crucial, because there’s a big difference between sucking his cock and letting him inside my body.
Inside my fucking soul.
And maybe that’s why I’m still a virgin—no one’s ever been important enough for me to want to go there. Though I’ve certainly tried a couple of times, only to watch it blow up in disaster after I realized I wasn’t ready.
In my experience, men are impatient and quick to anger when they don’t get what they want. Mandy would tell me that I have poor taste in guys, and maybe she’s right.
Fuck, I know she’s right. But Ashton is different. He’s not angry. He’s waiting with patience while I dress, aroused as all get-out and not doing a thing about it. My gaze stalls on his erection.
“Do you want me to…I could…do it again before I leave?” The thought of fitting my lips over him again excites me way too much.
A smirk shapes his mouth. “You want to suck my cock again?” He takes a step toward me. “You can say the words, you know. You won’t turn to salt, I promise.”
“I-I know.”
He invades my space in a way that’s becoming too familiar. Taking my chin between his thumb and forefinger, he studies my face. “Go home, Sadie. Tomorrow is another day. You can bet your reddened ass that I’ll be seeing you again.”
“Okay,” I whisper.
He lets me go, and somehow, I manage to escape his place with my heart still in one piece. With my lips unmolested by his tempting mouth. But I’m not a complete fool. We’re playing a dangerous game, and I’m kidding myself if I think I can keep my heart out of it for much longer, because I’m already in too deep.