I made it halfway to the second floor before his voice called me, reminding me yet again that we were going to be late. We were nowhere close to late, but the crazy man got me up at seven and my appointment wasn’t until eleven, “I have to pee!” I yelled back.

“Again?” His voice came from right behind me, so I gave him the bird over my shoulder and kept on my way to our bathroom. Beck chuckled behind me. Asshole. I could have stopped in Briggs and Harriet’s bathroom, but I hated going in their room when they weren’t home.

I peed and came back down, snagging my purse from the table in the living room, “Okay, Mr. Pushy. Let’s go!” Beck came running from the kitchen like a kid being told they were taking a trip to Toys “R” Us and kissed my head quickly. I rolled my eyes at him and followed him out the door, patting Sadie’s head on the way, “I could have sworn you were twelve years older than me, but you can be so childish.” I glared at him as I stepped into the car. I got another head kiss and he ran around to the driver’s side.

Once he started the car, I checked the time. Ten fifteen. It took a whole nine minutes to drive to the OB’s office, but at that point, I wasn’t about to bust his happy bubble. My poor husband had talked about nothing but this appointment for days. I turned on the radio, but Beck turned it off, earning himself another middle finger, “Tell me how this is going to go.”

“We’ve been over it, Beck. I don’t really know either.” I went over different scenarios, again, all down Broadway and into the parking garage.

Beck nearly dragged me out of the car and to the glass doors of the hospital. I led him down the halls to the elevator, up three floors, and down one more hall to Doctor Brabson’s office. He held the door for me and we stepped into the dim waiting room. A flat screen on the far wall had the news on and a few other pregnant women dotted the chairs. At the window, Beck handed me my new insurance card and the papers about my name change. He had been more than adamant about my name matching his as soon as possible. I checked in and she promised the wait wasn’t long.

Beck found us seats near the door and promptly picked my hand up to kiss it, “Is it wrong of us to not invite any family?” I looked up at him, thinking at least our moms should have come. Mine was still mad, but she would have come.

“I wanted it to be just us, Doll. We can tell your family at dinner tonight, and Ma and Harriet later tonight. I’ll tell Briggs at work, he’s already text me four times,” Beck kissed my hand again and I leaned my head on his shoulder, “All the things we ordered will be in tomorrow.” I nodded. Despite a huge shower for Cori and I in the works, Beck had insisted on us buying all the big items ourselves. Crib, car seat, changing table, and a rocking chair.

The door opened and a nurse stuck her head out, “Meredith Layton?” Beck raised his hand and pulled me from the chair, smiling like a flipping moron. I kissed his cheek and we went to the back, following the woman into the first room on the right. I settled on the table and Beck took the chair next to me. I hadn’t seen the baby since the day I passed out in his lap, so a bundle of excited nerves settled in my stomach. Beck was on the verge of spontaneous combustion. His leg bounced uncontrollably and he kept rubbing his hands together.

The door closed and the woman handed me a towel, “Tuck this in the band of your pants, so no gel gets on them.” I did as I was told, lifting my shirt to expose my stomach. She put the gel on the wand and placed it on my stomach. The huge screen in front of us immediately showed the profile of the baby. No searching for it, no beans with tiny legs, an honest to god baby. Beck grabbed my hand and I gasped.

“How does it change so much in a few weeks?” The baby kicked and wiggled. Its tiny hands went into its mouth and back out. It still had an alien look with a big head and slightly scrawny body. The tech measured and clicked, but Beck and I just stared. I could have watched for an eternity.

“They grow quick in there,” She laughed, “Do we want to know what we’re having?”

“Yes!” Beck almost yelled and the tech laughed, moving the wand lower and pressing around. The nervous knot in my gut tightened.

We instantly got a clear shot of legs and boy parts. No mistaking it, “Congratulations, Mom and Dad. It looks like a boy,” A choked sound came from Beck and he pulled my knuckles to his lips. I tore my eyes from the screen to see him staring, eyes wide and his mouth resting on my hand. She measured every body part while the baby moved and squirmed around. “I’ll get some pictures printed and let you get cleaned up. Meet me in the hall when you’re done.” The wand vanished, the image went black, and a long breath came from Beck.

I used the towel to wipe off my stomach and let Beck pull me up into a hug, “Alexander Allen Layton.” He breathed against my hair. I closed my eyes.

“Come on.” Beck finally let me pull away and I nearly made it to the door.

I touched the handle and was pulled back into him, “I love you, Doll,” His hand slipped under my shirt to rest on my stomach and I settled back into him. It only took a second before I felt his dick against my back and turned to glare at him, “If I could bend you over that table I would. Don’t look at me like you wouldn’t love every second.”

“We had sex this morning, Beck,” I rolled my eyes and jerked the door open to see my doctor standing outside, where the nurse was handing him some papers. “Good morning Dr. Brabson.” Dr. Brabson came highly recommended by the ER doctor I saw the first time, and when I did some research, it turned out that he was the best. He was probably fifty-five, with gray hair and a nice smile. Nice guy. During my first appointment, he sat and listened with no judgement while I told him how I ended up pregnant and back home.

“Good morning, Meredith. Let’s get you weighed,” He patted my shoulder then reached for Beck, “Dr. Brabson.”

“Beck Layton, Meredith’s husband.” Beck shook his hand and we went to the scale down the hall. I hadn’t thrown up in weeks, well, unless you count after the visit from Zeke.

“Well congratulations on the nuptials,” Dr. Brabson pointed at the scale and I handed Beck my purse to get on. The numbers kept creeping up and finally stopped at one-fifteen. I did an internal happy dance, “Wonderful! Guess that boy is growing,” Dr. Brabson led us to a room and I hopped up on the table. He closed the door and looked over my chart, “You have the father listed as unknown.” His eyes narrowed over my chart.

“We can change that.” Beck snapped. I sighed and shot Beck a look. Not a good time for him to act like a possessive asshole.

“If Meredith is comfortable with that, we can change it.” Dr. Brabson eyed Beck over the chart. He knew everything, well except the new information I obtained about the questionable paternity. He knew about Zeke and the abuse, but I never told him Zeke’s name, so of course when Beck got all defensive, my doctor got worried for my safety.

“Of course-”

“I am,” I cut Beck off and glared at him, “Beck is really excited.”

Dr. Brabson ignored Beck and drew his eyebrows together, “I am a little concerned now, Meredith, you understand.”

Beck opened his mouth, but I held my hand up to shut him up, “Beck and I met when I moved back,” I made a point to look in Dr. Brabson’s eyes, choosing my words carefully, but ultimately decided to just say it and deal with Beck later, “He obviously can’t be the sperm donor, but will be the baby’s father. He’d never hurt me, I can promise that.”

Dr. Brabson nodded once and moved on to my blood pressure and measuring. I told him about the incident on my birthday, but he already knew, and recommended a pump after the baby comes. We talked a little about delivery and the second half of pregnancy. He didn’t tell me it was unethical, or say anything else about Beck claiming the baby. Dr. Brabson left us alone to deal with Beck’s shitty attitude.

We held eye contact for a second before Beck spoke, “That is my son.”

I slid off the table and into his lap, “I know, but I had to explain to him, Beck. You need to understand, not all of us get a guy like you. I got lucky. Tons of single moms are out there, just like you said, but there are plenty who stayed with abusive partners to not be a single mom. If I were one of those, I would hope a doctor would take notice and give a damn, okay?”

Beck buried his face in my hair, “No, I got lucky. Can you believe we’re having a boy? Your mother’s intuition was spot on.”

I nodded against him, “I told you,” I tried to sound confident, but I wasn’t, not at all, “This scares me. What if I can’t do it?”

I braced for him to get upset, but he kissed my neck instead, “You are going to be such an amazing mother, Doll, and you’re not alone,” Another kiss to my neck, “I know you don’t believe me yet, but I swear, I’m in this with you. Can you not tell how excited I am?” Before I could answer, the door opened and a nurse came in. She handed us the paper for check-out and said she would meet us up front to update the information in the computer. I filled in Beck’s information and he signed it with a smile. I was working really hard on believing him, but felt like I was living in a dream.

We gave the paper to the receptionist, and left the office with a long string of pictures. Beck nearly ran into the elevator door staring at them, “Look at his face.” I leaned against the wall with him, waiting for the elevator.

In the back of my mind, I worried that every time I looked at my son, I would be searching for some sign of who donated the other half of his DNA. Even looking at the one 3D image at the bottom of our pictures, I looked over his squished nose and round cheeks, wondering. The elevator opened, Beck pulled me in, and I blinked out of my darkness. I followed Beck silently to the car and he let me in the passenger side, setting the pictures in my lap. He talked, but I didn’t really listen, I just tried to remember every man I ever saw at Zeke’s house. Odds were still in favor of Zeke being the donor, he was the one I was with most frequently, but not knowing would kill me. Neither option on paternity sounded good, and both made me feel sick as hell. Beck rested a hand on my leg and I looked over at the smile on his face, promising me it didn’t matter. If only I were so sure.

Screw only being married a week, I knew exactly what she was thinking, every single bit of it. Another sign that Meredith and I were meant to be. We pulled in at The Dog House to see Cori, but I didn’t let her get out, not yet, “Stop torturing yourself, Doll. It doesn’t matter. He’s yours and mine, no one else matters.” I held her chin in my hand until she nodded.

“I’m about to sound like a monster right now, but please don’t get upset,” I sighed and she closed her eyes, “What if I know? What if he’s born and I know and I can’t even look at my son?” A tear ran down her cheek into my hand.

“Meredith, once you see him, it won’t matter,” She opened her mouth, but I kissed her, “He’s ours.” Meredith finally nodded and smiled. I took the string of pictures from her and used my phone to take my own copy of each one to show anyone who would listen.

“Pick me up in a bit? Or meet me at Mom and Dad’s?” Mere leaned in to rub her nose against my cheek.

“I’ll pick you up.” I got one more kiss and she hopped out, jogging up the steps to see her sister. I didn’t need to go to work, but felt obligated to show my brother his nephew. Ma and Briggs accepted my new role as Dad better than Meredith did. She was still waiting for the other shoe to drop.

I zipped to the other side of Broadway and pulled in just as Nick and Briggs got out of Nick’s blazer from lunch. Briggs strolled up to me, smiling, with his hands shoved in his pockets, “Let’s see.” I nearly threw the phone at him.

“It’s a boy,” I smiled and my brother hugged me.

“Holy shit. Everything good?” He swiped through the pictures over and over, smiling like an idiot. Eventually, he would wear Harriet down on kids too.

“Yeah, it’s all great. She’s gaining weight, the baby is growing. It was incredible, Briggs. I mean, I almost fucking cried.” I admitted.

“I cried when we saw George, like a little bitch. That nurse thought I was crazy,” Nick chimed in, taking my phone from Briggs, “These are awesome. Meredith okay? Not just physically.” Leave it to Nick to dampen my mood.

I shrugged, “Seems to be, but I don’t know,” Nick handed me my phone back, “She’s worried she might not be able to love him.” Saying it left a horrible taste in my mouth. Meredith was so loving, so giving, it hurt to think she felt that way.

“Can’t blame her,” Nick spoke up again, “What happened to her shouldn’t happen to anyone.” I swallowed. It never occurred to me, that as excited as I was, she might not be. Had she known about the rape when she was making a choice about the baby, Meredith wouldn’t have kept him.

Briggs put a hand on my back and ushered me toward the door, “Talk to her tonight.” He patted my back and left me for his cubicle. I felt sick, but walked to my desk and slumped in the rolling chair. I tried to figure out if I was a jackass for being so excited, for wanting the baby so much. It wasn’t the baby I wanted at first, it was her, but they were a pair, and I accepted it. Accepting it meant stepping up, and it didn’t take long before I was stoked about the baby. I laid my head in my hands and waited for the day to pass, to talk to my wife.

Meredith hopped in smiling and leaned over to kiss me. I forced a smile, waved at Jovie and pulled back onto Broadway. We made it halfway to her parent’s before she broke the awkward silence, “What’s wrong?” I pulled to the side of the interstate suddenly, making her grab the ‘oh shit’ handle and gasp. The car behind us honked and gave me the middle finger.

“If you knew about the rape, would we be having Alexander? Are you going to resent him for this?” I gripped the steering wheel, staring at the emblem in the center.

Her hand brushed my arm from elbow to wrist then squeezed, “I don’t know what I would have done. I’m glad I didn’t know. I wish I still didn’t,” Meredith rubbed her thumb over my wrist bone, “I spent all day asking myself the same thing, trying to figure out how to feel about it all. I can’t resent a baby. He didn’t ask for this, and I can’t keep being upset. I made my choice and I’m glad I did. Alexander brought me home, brought me to you.” I shook my head and started to pull back into traffic, completely unsatisfied with her answer. If I got technical, Mere answered the question, but it wasn’t what I wanted to hear her say.

“Okay.”

“I’m not done,” She whispered, “I wasn’t ready for this. For him, for you, but here we are. I love you, Beck, and you and I are going to raise the world’s most amazing little boy. I’ve spent a week convincing myself that you’re going to be okay with this, but I may have forgotten to convince myself.”

“I don’t want to push you into this, Doll. I want you to want it.” I finally looked at her and saw the most beautiful smile.

“I do. I promise.” Meredith leaned over and kissed me softly.

“You need to talk to someone about any of this?” It was a weird question considering her mother was a fucking shrink, and I hated the idea of someone being in my head, but if it helped her, I’d even go with her.

“I did. You remember Connie? From the bus? I called her today. She’s a therapist who isn’t Mom. I’m going to go see her next week and have lunch. I need to pay her back anyway,” Meredith sat back in her seat and pointed for me to drive. I did, “I’m still worried, but it’s about normal stuff. You’re right. He’s mine and yours and nothing else matters. Now I’m worried about pushing a human out of my body.” I laughed at the silly smile on her face, took her hand, and drove to our first family dinner at her parent’s.

The Jeep was already there, so Cori and Griffin were inside. I stopped Meredith before she could get out and gave her one more kiss. She took it a step further and ran her hand down my chest to the band of my pants then over my cock, “Can we please get this done and get home?” Meredith begged so cute.

“You already reminded me that we had sex this morning.” I pressed her hand into me harder, biting back a groan at the pressure.

“Yeah, but I’m hormonal and have a lot of proper fuckings to make up for,” she sucked my lower lip into her mouth, “I guess they are waiting for us though, huh?” Meredith rubbed her palm up and down the length of my cock.

“Doll, you’re gonna be sucking me off in this car if you don’t get out right now.” I growled and she giggled. I got a kiss on my cheek and Meredith got out of the car. I adjusted my dick and glared at her all the way up the stairs.

Her mother jerked the door open before we could knock, “It’s another girl, isn’t it? Cori won’t tell me a damn thing.” Margo looked between us and Allen appeared at the top of the stairs.

Meredith nudged me, “It’s a boy.” Margo’s eyes went wide and she squealed, jumping up and down to hug Meredith.

“Are you holding out on the name too? You girls and your secrets are driving me crazy.”

“Sorry, the name is still undecided,” Meredith lied, “But I have pictures. You can’t see them unless you let us in the house.” We were dragged up the steps to the kitchen where Allen was waiting with Ari and Cori. Meredith handed them her phone and watched them coo over our son. It went on a while and Margo cried, hugging her daughters.

Meredith and Cori went out to the screened porch with Allen, and Griffin offered me a beer from the fridge. I shook my head and he tossed me a water bottle, “Got all the paperwork done? Insurance is a damn nightmare.” Griffin leaned next to me, watching Cori and Meredith swing the girls in the backyard.

“Yeah, took care of it Monday, while Meredith changed her name.” Griffin warned me I would be on the phone for a year, and he was right. The woman asked me a million questions and we had to sign papers and send them back, prove we got married, and that she was pregnant.

“We were married before she got pregnant, but I had to add Axel too, and that was a lot of headache and cursing. They act like it’s an act of god to put shit in the computer.” Griffin rubbed his beard.

“It wasn’t fun, but we got it done. Baby’ll be covered once he’s born, so I think we’re good,” I finished the water bottle and tossed it in the recycling bin next to the trash can. Margo checked the food in the oven and clicked her tongue, shaking her head, “Something wrong?” I knew she wasn’t thrilled with the way we did things, but for her to still be bitching was a little much.

“I’m just trying to understand you. The baby isn’t yours.” I straightened up and so did Griffin. Griff and I fought the day we met when we were eight years old, and plenty of times since, but the man defended my relationship with Meredith at every turn.

“Yes, he is,” I clenched my fist and released it, “I get it, Margo, I do. You can’t figure out why I would do this,” She gestured for me to go on, “I love Meredith. Obviously, I married her. I’m going to explain it to you like I did her. I grew up with a father who wasn’t worth a shit, so I know what it’s like. If I wanted her, I had to accept the baby, but why just accept him? He’s living in my home, being carried by my wife, and will have my last name, just accepting him isn’t good enough for me. He is mine.”

“And what happens to my daughter and grandson when you’re done playing house?” Margo’s hands went to her hips.

“I’m thirty-two, don’t you think that’s a little old for games? There is no done, here. This is my life, our lives,” I looked over at Griffin, “Did you get this much shit?”

“No, I didn’t.” Griff snapped.

“An addict is an addict, Mr. Layton.” Margo turned her back to me.

“I am not a fucking addict,” I growled, “I am not the one who took her away and kept her from you,” I heard the door, but didn’t check to see who came in, “You are gonna have to accept this, or you’re gonna push her away.” I turned to leave only to see Meredith standing in the doorway.

“Everything okay?”

“Fine, Doll,” I made my way to her and rubbed her belly, kissing her head, “I’m gonna get some air.” I closed the door softly behind me, wanting to slam it, and jogged down the steps to the yard where Cori and Arianna were pushing the girls on the swings. I took over pushing Celia and she squealed when I pushed her higher than Cori could.