When the limo drops me back at the Perino’s house I note that both Angel and Mrs. Perino’s cars are in the driveway, meaning everyone’s already here and there is probably another amazing dinner waiting. Even better, my little white Subaru has been tucked up next to the garage. My heart swells with gratitude, because seeing it full of our things feels like I’ve been reunited with an old friend.

Angel peeks around the hood as I approach. “How’d it go?”

“Another day of strange rockstar-life moments. It’s getting less stressful. Or, at least I’m getting used to them some. It’s a crazy strange life they live. The baby is still cute though.” I’m trying to smile, but I’m so wiped out it’s hard to fake my optimism today. As I take in Angel’s calm, ever-observant eyes going over me like he’s already wrapped me into his protective bubble of gentle-giant-kindness, I realize with him, with the Perinos, I don’t have to fake things in front of them. I let my shoulders drop and add, “I’m really tired.”

“So I noticed.” He puts down his wrench, and closes the hood.

I point at the car. “Did you have it towed here, or is it actually fixed? I’m counting down the days when I won’t have to rely on riding in the limo with cranky-driver-man. I swear that guy hates me.”

Angel laughs. “A friend of mine helped me tow it here, no charge. I got a lead on a used engine. The thing should run you about $650.00. Labor is free of course. It will take about ten days of after-work tinkering to get it going again.”

“Do you think they’ll hold the engine for me until I get paid?” I lay my hand on the hood of the car.

“No need. I already paid for it. I know you’re good for it.”

“But that’s just the thing. You don’t know I’m good for it, not really.” I open one of the car’s side doors and pull out the two duffel bags that hold my clothes and Sage’s.

“Yes. I do.”

“Thank you, Angel. I’ll pay you the day Guarderobe pays me.”

Angel quirks a smile, takes both bags out of my hands and shoulders them when Mrs. Perino comes out of the back gate, calling, “Ragazzi! I saw the limo driving away. Are you coming in? Dinner’s lasagna tonight. It’s almost time to pull it out of the oven.”

“Just grabbing some things I’d been missing.” I answer, waving as she approaches.

Mrs. Perino reaches us, pausing to wipe her hands into her flowered apron. “Hello Robin. Bella-picola. Was the day good?” She pulls me into a quick hug and I breathe in the warm smell of flour and vanilla, probably from her baked goods, that I’m realizing always clings to her clothes. “Welcome home.”

“Good. Yes. Thanks.” I hug her back, my heart has expanded at the sincere welcome. Pulling back, I study their faces. “Why are you both so nice? Really, thank you for making my life so easy and caring for Sage. I want you to know I will pay you back for everything.”

Mrs. Perino opens her mouth like she’s about to protest but Angel presses closer to both of us and answers first, “Robin, look here at my mamma’s face.” He points at Mrs. Perino. “I know you only just met us as well, so you don’t have a comparison, but, see that smile?”

I nod, and Mrs. Perino smiles wider.

“The smile is one she’s been wearing since you and Sage arrived here. It’s a smile she I had almost forgotten. One that you and Sage brought here with you. To see it again, to know my mamma is feeling truly happy like some circle we’d had left wide open ten years ago has been closed thanks to you, is payback enough.”

“He’s right, Robin.” Mrs. Perino nods. “You have paid us back.”

Angel continues, locking his eyes onto mine, “It might be too soon to say this, but having you and Sage here with us has brought back how we felt before Cara died. We haven’t felt this right in so long.”

“What he means is,” Mrs. Perino puts a gentle arm on my arm. “We haven’t felt like a family. Not like a whole family. Always, something was missing. But with you and Sage sitting around our table, adding noise and life to the place, all suddenly feels peaceful. Like this was meant to be. Like we’re all in the right place. Do you have that feeling?”

Her words make me think how Sage had said almost the same thing, and have caused my chest to tighten and twist all over again, this time with such longing it actually hurts, because it makes me afraid. “I feel something, too,” I answer honestly. “I just don’t know what to do with how it feels.”

“Well, I know.” Mrs. Perino hugs herself. “It is why I’ve been asking you to stay here should you want to, because we want you to. You don’t need to search for an apartment. We have a place here. A perfect place. Cara’s cottage. When you see it, you will understand that it can work for the two of you. For us.”

Looking away from them both, I fiddle with the door handle on my car. “I peeked into that cottage last night. Cara’s art studio?” They nod, as I forge ahead. “It’s full of her supplies, her mind-blowing tree mural she’d painted on the wall. So beautiful.” The memories of it make me shiver. When I glance between them, they’re nodding, but I can see they also feel a little guilty. “Why didn’t you tell me Cara was a serious artist? Like an amazing, fine artist? You said she was into painting.” I make air quotes. “But from what I saw, she was better than great. Why didn’t you tell me?”

Angel laughs a tight laugh. “Because I’m cynical, and because I don’t believe in God anymore, or even fate.” He holds out his arms for me to see goosebumps scattered there. “All this woo-woo-goose-bumps all over my arms, shaking legs, dreams of my sister all night long, and all that I’ve been suddenly experiencing and believing in since the first second I met you, makes me feel like a freak. That’s why.”

Mrs. Perino picks up Angel’s hand. “That’s what you’ve been feeling? Me too.” She puts an arm around his waist.

Angel levels me with that black wide-open gaze of his. “Because telling you our past scares the shit out of me. Because based on your expression, all that I’ve wondered is true.”

“What do you mean?” I ask.

“I wondered, if I mentioned any of the bigger similarities between you and Cara, if it would freak you out. I was afraid it would make you bolt the hell out of here. I also figured you’d find out on your own.” His eyes skate away from mine. “Everyone finds out about us, eventually, and then they don’t stick around, and my mom and I…well, we really want you to stay.”

I sigh, looking between both of them. “What if I don’t want to wait and find out eventually? Mrs. Hildebrandt said some things that made me wonder.”

“Maybe she said a few things that made you a little…afraid?”

I nod, and Mrs. Perino shakes her head, that smile of hers dimming some.

I dart Angel a small look, and he winces in this way that makes me take up his hand and give it a squeeze. “I know we promised no questions, and you both have been so cool about not asking me things, but will you, can you, tell me what happened at least to Cara? I don’t have this urge to run out of here like you think I might, Angel.” I swallow down a lump of worry. “But I think I need to know. So, I can decide if we should stay, how you want us to stay. You know?”

“It is a wretched story, Robin.” Mrs. Perino’s brow furrows. “Can you do it Angel? Can you talk about it?”

He nods. “It’s been so long. But, I don’t want you to get sad again, Mamma. It always makes you so sad.”

“I won’t. Not now that we’ve met our Robin and Sage.” Mrs. Perino places an arm over my shoulder and searches my eyes like she’s once again searching for her Cara, not in my eyes, but in the air that’s around us all.

“You know I can’t take her place. That…I wouldn’t even want to try,” I whisper.

“We know that, Robin. Of course, we know that, but I can’t help but think my own girl brought you to us. That she, too, wants you to stay,” Mrs. Perino answers while I continue to shake my head. She sighs, glancing again to Angel. “After dinner, then, Robin. We shall tell you everything. And then you will understand. Then you will be able to decide.”