~ CATHERINE ~
Tuesday the 27th of June, 1989
I woke from a dreamless sleep, feeling refreshed for once. I pulled back the curtains to be greeted by a stunning bright blue sky and our neighbour’s dog. Happy to see me, the Alsatian barked excitedly, his tail wagging overtime. I shushed him, then jumped out of bed and got dressed, heading into the kitchen a few ticks later.
“Morning!” I chirped, pulling my hair into a ponytail.
“Sounds like you slept well,” Mum replied, taking a sip of her coffee. She was sitting at the table with Dad, who had his face buried in the newspaper. He grunted “Morning” at me, his sleep obviously not so good.
“Yup, a great sleep,” I replied, for once not sneaking out to train, needing a full sleep instead. I walked over to the bread bin and pulled out two wholemeal slices, slotting them into the toaster. “I’m going to karate tonight with Nicky.”
Mum snorted out a laugh. “How did you talk her into that?”
“It wasn’t too hard,” I answered as honestly as I could. “I think she just wants to spend more time with me.”
I poured myself a large glass of orange juice while the bread toasted, gulping down half of its pulpy goodness. Once the toast had popped, I smothered it with peanut butter. Instead of going to the breakfast table, I leaned against the bench and jammed the toast in my mouth.
Mum twisted in her seat to look at me. “I’m assuming Nicky will bring her new car?”
“New is the overstatement of the century. It’s a beat-up yellow Mini, with a bad gearshift that’s only going to get worse, because she grates it all the time. But yeah, she’s bringing her new car.” I laughed and drained the rest of the juice, washing down the last of my toast. “And there’s no need to take me to school today if you don’t want to. I’m okay to walk.”
She shook her head. “No, I’m driving you whether you like it or not. Plus, I’ve got to pop in to see the mechanics.”
“What’s wrong with the wagon?”
“The radiator’s acting up.”
“Okay, just got to brush my teeth first.” I headed out of the room, doing just that, then grabbed my bag. Slinging it over a shoulder, I strolled downstairs to the station wagon. Mum was already there, opening her door. She got behind the wheel and started the engine. I climbed in after her, buckling up. As she backed out of the driveway, bright sunlight streamed through the windscreen, making me squint, but not for long, Mum arriving at school in no time.
I hopped out and waved at her as she left, ignoring the other students staring at me. Ever since the reserve incident, I felt like I was being put under a magnifying glass, everything I did with Christopher made out to be bigger than it was. It was uncomfortable to say the least, something I wished would blow over quick.
As I walked to my form room a group of Stephen’s rugby mates waved at me to come over. I waved at them back—just with my middle finger. They burst out laughing, one of them hollering, “Can you tutor me in Sex ED?”
I clenched my hand and continued walking, wishing I could punch the smirk off the douchebag’s stupid face. But adding battery to wagging would just get me grounded again, not to mention suspended or expelled.
I entered my form room, noticing that Christopher wasn’t here yet. I sat down next to Stephen, giving him a sidelong glare. “Your mates are douchebags,” I said.
He didn’t reply, just smirked at me, obviously finding my comment funny. His long blond hair was pulled back into a ponytail today, emphasizing his high cheekbones. What Nicky had said about him possibly being a Merge ran through my mind, her point valid. He really was quite beautiful, his bone structure too good to be true. But it was his violet eyes that were the most extraordinary, so bright, so unreal. Now knowing what I did about Merges, he honestly looked like an angel, a Terra one in particular.
His smile widened. “Take a picture, it’ll last longer.”
I scowled at him. “I’m not interested in you, dickwad.”
He snorted out a laugh and leaned back in his chair. “Yeah, yeah, you’re in loove with Chris.”
I went to say that I wasn’t in love, but the bell rang right at that moment, making me jump in my seat. Mr. Stanton entered the room a split second later. The preppy students sat up straighter, Kylie not one of them. She continued chatting to her friend Tanya. Mr. Stanton bellowed at her to be quiet, getting an offended look from the girl, who probably thought she’d done nothing wrong.
He started calling out the roll. When he came to Christopher’s name, Stephen answered instead, “He’s sick; his dad said that he won’t be in today.”
“Well, I hope he remembers there’s the swim comp tomorrow,” Mr. Stanton replied.
“He hates swimming, so no worries,” Stephen answered with a smirk. “He’s scared of water.”
The boys sniggered, while the girls shook their heads or rolled their eyes, probably thinking that Stephen was just talking crap. Though, knowing Christopher, it sounded about right.
I focused on Stephen as Mr. Stanton continued to call out names. “What’s wrong with Chris? Is he all right after last night?” I whispered, referring to what had happened after the confirmation class.
He frowned, for the first time looking dead serious. “I’m not sure whether I should say anything, it’s a family matter.”
“I’m his girlfriend, so I should know.”
Stephen glanced at Mr. Stanton, then back at me, lowering his voice to a whisper. “Do you know that Chris’ dad knocks him about?”
“He mentioned they had a fight once.”
“Not just once. It’s why my mum wants custody of Chris. She got so upset last night. She really ripped into my uncle, screaming at him over the phone. She kept yelling that he shouldn’t have done that. I asked her what that was, but she burst into tears and took off in her car.” He shook his head, genuine concern furrowing his brow. “I just hope that my uncle didn’t take things too far this time.”
“What do you mean by too far?”
“Just put it this way, I wouldn’t be surprised if Chris is in hospital.”
***
The sound of honking came from my driveway. I quickly ran down the stairs and out the front door. I threw my bag into the back of Nicky’s car and jumped in, desperate to see Christopher. I’d rung his house, but every single time his grandfather answered, and every single time I hung up without saying a word. It had turned me into a bundle of nerves, so worried that Christopher had been hurt badly. The only thing that had stopped me from turning up on his front doorstep was the hope that he would still show tonight.
“Do you think Chris’ll be there if he’s sick?” Nicky asked, reversing out.
“I don’t think he’s sick. Stephen told me that Chris’ dad might’ve beat him up.”
She swung the car around. “You serious?”
“Wish I wasn’t.”
“Stephen never mentioned anything to me about this,” she said, looking shocked.
“It’s not exactly something anyone would want to talk about.”
“True, but I still think he should’ve told me.” She yanked on the gearshift to move forward.
“Take it easy, Nicky, you’re going to ruin the gears if you keep doing that.”
“I know, I know. Manuals are such a pain in the arse. Wish I’d got an automatic instead.” She accelerated, thankfully not grating the gears to do it.
My nerves steadily grew as we neared our destination—the bus shed, where we were meant to pick Christopher up from. It wasn’t long before we got there, my relief at seeing him massive. He was sitting on the bus shed’s bench, the street light casting shadows across his hunched-over form. Nicky honked the horn, not getting a reaction.
Worried, I hopped out of the Mini. “Chris?”
He still didn’t look up, just kept staring down at his feet. Bobbing down in front of him, I placed a hand under his chin and lifted it. A bluish-purple bruise framed his left eye, with a Band-Aid underneath it. He also had a swollen cheek and one hell of an upset expression. He averted his eyes, unable to hold my gaze.
I sat down next to him. “You okay?”
He shook his head.
“Why did your dad hit you?”
“Because I hit him first,” he replied, finally looking at me. “He was a bastard to you last night, with his stupid double meanings and glares. He was stupid to think I wouldn’t react to that.”
“Oh, Chris, I hate seeing you hurt,” I said, pulling him into a hug.
He drew me even closer. “My mother was livid with the both of us. I’ve never heard her yell so much. I couldn’t take it, so I took off. That’s why I wasn’t at school today.”
“Where did you go?”
“The countryside. Just stayed in my car.”
“You should have gone to Stephen’s house. He said his mum wants to get custody of you.”
He shook his head. “I’m old enough to leave home, so she doesn’t need to do that, but I guess my auntie wouldn’t understand that. She’s lovely, but not too bright.” He gave me a sad smile. “Still, I appreciate the thought.”
“Stephen told me she went berko at your dad, yelling at him over the phone. She sounds like she really cares for you.”
“Sì,” he said, letting go of me. “Zia Autumn is the total opposite of my father, but then again, she’s not his full sibling.”
“Does that mean Stephen’s a Merge?”
He nodded. “A Terra, but his famiglia are Deniers.”
“Oh,” I said, remembering reading about that. “They pretend to be human?”
“That’s right. Stephen doesn’t even know he’s a Merge. It’s because of his mother. She’s overprotective of him, thinks it’ll keep him safe.”
“You don’t agree?” I asked, getting that from his tone.
“Sì, knowledge is power, ignorance is dangerous. She and my uncle should be teaching Stephen to protect himself. What if a demon goes after him like one went after me? He won’t be able to protect himself at all.” He shook his head. “But what do I know, like my father said, I’m just a stupid kid.”
“You’re not stupid.”
“He treats me that way. Apparently, I’m just an idiot who only thinks with my cock, not my head. That’s what he said after I told him he had no right to treat you so horribly. Then he had the fucking gall to laugh at me when I said I loved you. I just lost it. Totally went at him like a...” He let the words trail off.
“Like a what?”
“Nothing.” He pushed to his feet. “We should go.”
He approached the car, nodding a hello at Nicky. I slipped past him and pushed the passenger seat forward, climbing into the back. Christopher followed me, looking uncomfortable as he jammed his long legs into the confined space.
“You could’ve gotten a smaller car, Nicky,” he said sarcastically, wrapping an arm around my shoulders.
“Not my choice, I’m afraid. I wanted a Beetle not a Mini.”
She cranked the gears and set off for the reserve. The little car bounced along the gravelly road, slowing down as we entered the parking area. As expected, it was empty.
She stopped by a row of trees. “Are you sure that you want me to leave you here?” she asked, glancing back at us. “It’s so dark.”
“I’ve got a torch, so we’ll be fine,” Christopher replied, pushing the seat forward. He climbed out and extended a hand, pulling me free from the cramped space. “See you in an hour, Nicky,” he said, giving the Mini’s roof a slap, indicating for her to leave.
After she’d left, he removed the Halo rosary from his pocket and slipped it over his head. “Perfect way to see in the dark,” he said, lighting up like an angel. I reminded myself that he was one.
“I thought you would use a flame.”
“My father yanked my rosary off me, wouldn’t give it back.”
“Oh, I’m so sorry.”
“It’s not your fault.” He grabbed my hand and led me through the trees. After walking a short distance, he laid his jacket out behind a bush. He pulled me down to sit next to him. I shivered a little, feeling like someone was walking over my grave. He wrapped his arms around me, bathing me in the Halo’s light, which felt soothing as well as warm. Snuggling in close, I rested my head against his chest, wishing I could stay cocooned in his arms forever. We sat like that for ages, not needing to talk, just enjoying being together.
He eventually broke the silence. “God, you’re beautiful,” he murmured, running the backs of his fingers down my cheek.
He hooked a finger under my chin and lifted it. Smiling sadly at me, he leaned in, brushing his lips over mine. I opened my mouth for him, our tongues tangling, our desires the same. I lost myself in the kiss, forgetting about everything other than what we were doing right now, in this moment, just the two of us. I almost cried out when he broke the kiss, but definitely didn’t complain when his lips glided down my neck, so sensual, so soft, the warmth emanating from the Halo rosary doubling my pleasure. It was all-encompassing, such sheer delight, the energy between us making me breathless.
He pushed me onto my back and pressed his lips against mine. I slid my hands under his top, caressing the scars on his back without thought, too overcome by the moment to realise that I shouldn’t be touching them. But he didn’t pull away this time. Instead, his hand slipped between my thighs, his fingers sparking against my flesh. I let out a startled squeal. He instantly broke the kiss, leaving me lying on my back, staring up at him with wide eyes, the Halo beads glowing even stronger.
“Did I hurt you?” he asked, sounding worried.
“No, the sparks just gave me a surprise.”
“What sparks?”
“From your fingers.”
“It was probably from the Halo rosary.”
I smiled at him. “Or we just have mad chemistry.”
He smiled back. “Then, let’s see.” He pulled the Halo rosary off, sending us plummeting into darkness, only the light from the moon stopping it from becoming pitch black. He lay down on top of me.
I pushed at him, shouting, “You’re squashing me!”
He laughed and rolled off me, lying down on his side. Turning to face him, I leaned forward and kissed his lips. He returned the kiss, then rested his forehead against mine, his tone turning serious.
“You’re not really going to meet my grandfather here, are you?” he asked.
I jerked back, his words an instant mood killer. “I said Boyd’s Beach, not here.”
“He won’t go near water, so wants it changed.”
A chill ran up my arms. Was I going to die the same way as my sister, in the same reserve? I glanced at my surroundings. We weren’t in the same part as where my sister had died, the place massive, but the chill still continued down my back, making me think of what Christopher had said about wandering spirits. Was Vesna’s soul here, trying to warn me away, telling me not to fight Christopher’s grandfather? Or maybe it was my fear, which had been steadily growing each day.
“Either way, you’re not going,” he added.
“I think it’s going to happen no matter what,” I replied. “Last Saturday, I had a dream about all of the legendary rosaries. Near the end, it showed me a little of your grandfather’s past. How much are you aware of your family’s history?”
He didn’t reply.
“Chris?”
“Put it this way, we have a lot of skeletons in the attic.”
“You mean closet? Anyway, I saw him burn a priest alive. It was so far from angelic it wasn’t funny.” I paused, hoping he wasn’t going to get offended. “Is there demon blood in your family?”
His jaw clenched.
My heart plummeted, his reaction answering my question. “How much?”
“My father’s supposedly half demon. I don’t know about my grandfather, but my parents act like he’s a full angel. But I’m not so sure he is, especially if his claims about being able to possess innocents is true, because only demons are supposed to be able to do that.”
I nodded. “I agree. I think he does have demon in him.”
“Which means I’m more than a quarter demon.”
“Which also means you’re more angel than demon.”
“Does it bother you I’m part demon?”
I shook my head. “No, because you’re not like your dad and granddad. You’re good.”
He grimaced. “I’m not good. When I punched my father, I got joy from it. I didn’t even care when he punched me back, or when my mother cried. I just lost it.” He let out a raspy breath. “Ever since my grandfather told me he would possess my body to get at you, something changed inside of me. Do you know how I felt when he said that?”
“Horrible.”
“More than that. He broke my heart. Here is this man I’ve idolised all my life and he said he was just going to use my body against my will. How could he do that to me?”
I didn’t reply, Christopher not needing an answer, just an ear to listen to.
He continued, “I don’t want to be near him anymore. I’ve loved him all my life, yet these last few days it’s like...” He let out another shaky breath. “I hate him. My father too. And my mother. I know she’s stuck up for me, but it’s not enough. Papà has hit me so many times, really hit me, and she refuses to leave him. She loves him more than me, which is so wrong. A mother should love their child more than anything in the world, but she doesn’t, because if she did, she wouldn’t stay with someone who knocks their own child around. She even loves my grandfather more than me, because wouldn’t you leave if you heard someone say they wanted to possess your child’s body?”
I nodded, knowing it wasn’t just his dad and granddad who’d hurt him. His mum was as much to blame, someone who was meant to nurture and protect him, but just stood by while he got abused.
He barrelled on, “I felt like nothing when my grandfather said that, and even worse when my mother didn’t care enough to protect me. I felt like a slab of meat, just there to be used. It hurt, hurt so bad that I think I finally snapped. Snapped so hard that I’m afraid I’ve let the demon side take over my angel side.” He looked down at his hands, picking at a nail. “For a second I wanted to kill Papà, my nonno too.” He looked back up at me. “Even my mother. How could I want that? It has to be the demon in me. Am I turning evil like them?”
“No.” I placed a hand on his cheek. “Your family has pushed you too far.”
He leaned forward, resting his forehead against mine. “I was wrong when I said it would be over between us if you hurt my grandfather. It’s not your fault, it’s his. So, no matter what happens between you and him, it won’t change the way I feel about you. We’re in this together. It’s you and me, cara, just you and me.”
I bit my lip, knowing he’d change his mind pretty quick if I did end up killing his grandfather. But instead of verbalising my thoughts, I kissed him, preferring not to think about our uncertain future. We continued to kiss, Christopher’s body growing warmer, shielding me from the cold night. It surprised me, since he wasn’t wearing his Seraphim rosary, or the Halo one, which still lay on the ground.
A loud honking startled us apart, obviously Nicky having returned early. I looked down at my watch, turning on the little light to check the time, surprised to see a whole hour had passed. I looked back at Chris, who was slipping the Halo rosary over his head. His lips were swollen, making me wonder just how long we’d been kissing the time away.
“Time’s up,” I said. “That’ll be Nicky.”
Surprise crossed his features. “Where’d the time go?”
“Kissing your lips,” I replied, pushing to my feet.
He rose too, still looking surprised. I took hold of his hand and pulled him across the field. As we neared Nicky’s car, he removed the Halo rosary, only the Mini’s headlights and the moon lighting the way.
He murmured something as he opened the passenger door.
I looked up at him. “What?”
“I love you.” He let go of my hand and climbed into the backseat of the Mini, not hearing my whispered, “I think I might love you, too.”