Cami

After the Ashleys left, Camille sat down on her bed. She was feeling overwhelmed by emotions and it was gnawing away at her energy. She leaned back against her pillows and stared at the scribbles she and Nate had added to her Hello Wall over the past few weeks. It was a map of their time together, and as her fingers traced over the words, her heart clenched with regret. Why now? Why didn’t she learn to live until she was dying?

In truth, Camille had always been dying. At least since she was diagnosed with lymphoma. But it wasn’t until she met Nate, that she realized how much of her life she’d wasted acting like she was already dead.

She’d walked around like she was already a ghost, never letting anyone in, keeping her parents at arms length to make saying goodbye easier. It had all been a waste. Because no matter what Camille did, it still hurt. Even if she fought and got a little more time, she knew she couldn’t outrun her fate. It was like trying to fight a shadow.

Camille shuddered. She’d wasted so much time trying to shut everyone out to make things easier. But they weren’t. She was still terrified of saying goodbye to her life, especially now that she wanted so much more of it.

A soft knock at her door pulled Camille from her thoughts. She sat up, feeling a bit dizzy with grief. Her mother poked her head into the room. She was carrying a tray of food and drinks.

“Camille . . .” Her mother’s mouth dropped open when she saw her. “You look . . .” She started to tear up.

“Mom, don’t cry or I’m gonna cry and then the Ashleys will have to come back, and there’s already enough glitter in the carpet from their makeover to last a lifetime.”

Her mother laughed. “Okay, okay. No tears. You just look so beautiful, honey.”

“Thanks, Mom.”

“I brought you something to eat.”

“Oh, thanks Mom, but I think I’m too excited to eat.”

Her mother looked at the tray of half eaten sandwiches she’d delivered to Camille and the Ashleys for lunch. Camille could tell her mother wanted to scold her for not eating more. But she didn’t. All she said was, “You have a big night ahead of you. Are you excited?”

“Yeah, I really am.” Camille paused. “Mom, does love always hurt like this?”

“What do you mean, honey?”

Camille’s voice wavered. “I’m terrified of losing Nate, or hurting him. I just love him so much, and it scares me.”

Her mother sat next to her on the bed and pulled Camille into a hug. After a while she took Cami’s hands. “I know what you’re going through isn’t something any of us can imagine. But love is love, Camille. It’s always a risk. Whether you have cancer or not.”

Camille nodded and her mother stroked a hand down her cheek, tilting her chin so she could look into her eyes. Camille always loved that she and her mother had the same eyes—steel blue—like storm clouds over the ocean. It spoke to their strength.

“Honey, all I can tell you is that love isn’t easy, but it’s always worth it.”

“I’m in love with him, Mom.”

“I know, honey. And I know he loves you.”

Camille squeezed her mother tighter.

“You deserve to be loved, Camille.”

“But I’m gonna hurt him in the end.”

“Maybe,” she whispered. “But not tonight. Let’s take things one day at a time.”

Camille took a deep breath and nodded.

“Nathan wanted to make tonight special for you. We all did. I know we’ve had our differences, Camille. But I want you to know I love you more than anything in the world. And I just want you to be happy.”

“Nate makes me happy, Mom. And you and Dad make me happy. I love you.”

“I know, sweetheart.” Her mother kissed her forehead. “I love you, too.” She gave Camille another hug and then helped her up from the bed. “Now come on. We have to stay on schedule.”

Camille realized she hadn’t opened the envelope Ashley gave her. She flipped open the tab and pulled the notecard out.

“What’s he talking about?” Camille asked.

Her mother grinned and shrugged.

“You know, don’t you?”

“He ran the master plan by us.”

“And?” Cami prodded.

“And you’re just going to have to go along for the ride tonight, Camille.”

“But—”

“It’s okay to let someone else make the plans once in a while, honey.”

Camille eyed her mother suspiciously. She was the biggest control freak Camille knew, and most likely who Camille inherited her neurotic obsession for order from.

Her mother laughed. “Yes, I realize it’s the pot calling the kettle black.”

Camille laughed. “Maybe Nate really is a good influence around here.”

“Very funny. Now come on, your father isn’t letting you out the door without taking a million photos and I still want you to eat something before you leave.”

Camille grinned and followed her mother downstairs, leaving the ache and apprehension from earlier far behind.

Nate

Nate’s heart was in his throat when he knocked on Camille’s front door. It felt strange to be standing there again. For nearly a month he’d been living at the LaRue’s sprawling French Quarter home. And spending the night away had really given him perspective. He’d promised Camille that he would take whatever time she could give him and not pressure her for more. But after spending a night alone, staring at the cracks in his ceiling, he began to feel like they would soon be a reflection of his heart—cracked and broken.

Nate was so used to having Camille sleep nestled against his side, that he hadn’t been able to sleep at all without her. He hadn’t realized how alone he would feel without the touch of her breath at his neck, or the pump of her heart against his. She had become as much a part of Nate as his shadow, and the ache of losing her weighed on his soul.

He had hoped that his plans for today would be enough to drive his dark thoughts away, but as Nate stood at her door waiting for Camille to answer, he could think of nothing else. And when she finally answered, looking like a goddess in her ball gown, he wanted to drop to his knees and beg her to fight for every damn second she could. His heart pounded the same words over and over again, Don’t leave me. Don’t leave me.

“Speechless, huh?” she said, grinning back at him like a porcelain doll.

“You look beautiful, Camille.”

She suddenly had her arms around his waist, hugging him tight. “Thank you for the dress and everything. Today has been . . . perfect.”

She looked up at him with those big sparkling eyes of hers and Nate’s resolve snapped into place like armor. For her, he would hold it together. She deserved one perfect night where all her dreams came true and he was going to do his damnedest to make that happen—for the both of them.

“It’s just getting started,” Nate said, brushing a light kiss against her cheek. “Are you ready?”

“Are you kidding? My dad’s not letting us outta here without a kajillion more photos.”

Nate laughed, and let Camille lead him into the house, glad for the familiar ease holding her hand brought him.

* * *

When they’d been fully paparazzied, Nate led Cami back to the front door, blaming their quick getaway on the strict schedule he’d mapped out. Nate watched Camille glitter as she sashayed a step ahead of him. The dress had been worth every penny. He’d drained his savings account to purchase it and took a loan from his mom to cover the rest. His mom agreed to help pay for Camille’s dress only after Nate promised her he’d let his dad take pre-prom photos to send to her. Nate would’ve agreed to just about anything to make this night perfect for Camille, and so far, it was. And he had to admit it was kind of nice to share it with his dad, too. They’d had a good talk before driving to Camille’s.

Nate was thankful for the way Cami had brought his family together. He and his dad had taken big steps in mending their relationship in the past few weeks. They had a better line of communication since the day Nate had broken down in front of him over Cami’s cancer news. Nate was grateful to have his dad back in his life. He knew he was going to need his dad’s support if there was any chance of surviving what losing Cami would do to him.

Nate said goodbye to his dad and Camille’s parents, and then helped Cami into her black velvet wrap. He trained his eyes on her to be sure he wouldn’t miss a moment of her reaction when he opened the door. From her gasp, to her shriek of joy, Nate knew every hoop he’d jumped through to hire a horse and carriage to take them to prom had been worth it. Camille was bouncing on her toes.

“Nate! Oh my God! I can’t believe you did this!”

“You said you used to love them when you were little, so . . .” He trailed off, watching her grin from-ear-to-ear as she walked up to the massive white horse.

He snapped a Polaroid of Cami kissing the horse’s nose, before helping her into the carriage.

“Is there anything you haven’t thought of?” she asked, snuggling in under his arm.

“I hope not.” He pulled her closer. He’d missed everything about her in the night they’d spent apart. Nate drank in her light smell of lavender that encapsulated the air around them, letting it wrap around his heart like barbed wire.

“Nate, this is incredible.”

Nate stowed his fear and grinned at Camille’s glowing face. “You want the moon, just say the word and I’ll lasso it, my darling.”

She giggled.

“We’ll always have Paris, kid.”

“You’re mixing up all the movie quotes.”

“I’m making up my own. That’s what tonight is all about. Think of it like the greatest hits of romance. We’re doing it all, baby! Starting with riding off into the sunset.”

Camille smiled so bright, the tiny dimple in her cheek showed. Bringing that dimple to the surface could be Nate’s sole goal in life. He’d die a happy man if he couldn’t count the amount of times he’d seen it.

“Isn’t the riding into the sunset supposed to come last?”

“Not tonight, mon cheri.”

She giggled again. “I think I like Romantic Nate.”

“Good, because you’re gonna get a whole lot of him tonight.”