Trent
Motherfucker! She had me all wrong. Whore?
First off, I didn’t pay for sex... ever. Sure, there was a fine line between the gentleman in me and the prick who fucks for a living, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t there.
Secondly, did she honestly think fucking me was part of her job? That was a question I intended to ask, but anger forced the need to calm down first. Nowhere in any part of the contract did it stipulate we were going to embark in a sexual relationship. Again I thought, what type of man did she think I was?
Given her attitude, I wasn’t sure I’d ever change her opinion of me. Having thick skin was needed in my profession. Yet, knowing how Molly truly labeled me fucking stung. Why I needed her to believe there was so much more to me than fucking seemed ridiculous... but I did.
In the darkness, I wandered around the grounds bouncing between feeling hurt and feeling annoyed. I blew off a production meeting to spend time with her. Like an idiot, I thought we’d enjoy the bath together, maybe have sex in the tub, and hit the restaurant in the hotel for a late dinner.
Oddly, when I slipped in beneath the bubbles, I pushed the thought of burying myself deep inside of her to the back of my mind. At that moment, all I wanted was to touch her skin and help her relax before we headed out. The euphoric look on her face told me she enjoyed my ministrations. I thought it would have been something that pleased her.
Instead, there she was in our room getting too wrapped up in her own head, and there I was brooding over her opinion of me. Did she think I liked admitting I needed her to get hard? That I couldn’t perform with Raven if Molly wasn’t there? No, I fucking hated it. But, I wasn’t that much of an arrogant son-of-a-bitch that I couldn’t admit when I needed something. Nor could I ignore the insatiable want I had for her.
Molly, on the other hand, was a different story. Once she got caught up in that pretty head of hers, she became as stubborn as a mule. I kicked a stone in my path taking out my frustrations on anything in front of me. The calm air was in contrast to the fury and confusion that swirled within me.
I walked to the edge of the property and stared at the sun that had begun to dip behind the treeline. The way it retreated and hid reminded me of the furious brunette inside of the hotel. She could deny it all she wanted, but she enjoyed herself as much as I had. Hell, she instigated the entire thing... something she let slip her mind when she called herself a whore. A whore. Was she fucking kidding? Maybe that’s what she thought of me since I was the one who got paid to have sex for a living.
Except, I didn’t feel that way. I was an actor. Something else that seemed to be going against me. According to her, she didn’t believe anything that came out of my mouth. What was next? Did she think everything I had said to her was from a script? Next to the whore comment, that had to be the most ludicrous thing ever. Not only did I not consider her a whore, but I sure as hell didn’t rehearse what I had said to her. Any and all lines came from my heart.
Shoving my hands deep into my pockets I began to walk back to the hotel. Something had to give. Even though I was mad as fuck, I needed to prove my intentions with her were genuine. Spotting the flowers she commented on when we arrived a few feet in front of me, I reached down, surrounded a bunch with my hand, and yanked them clear out of the ground... roots and all.
I quickly scanned the area and overhang above me ensuring there weren’t any security cameras, something I should have done prior to their extrication and shook the dirt from their roots. The gesture may have been small, but it dawned on me that actions spoke louder than words. And I wasn’t talking about sexual actions because those just backfired, but more so romantic ones.
Glancing around me, I stealthily hid the blossoms as I made my way through the lobby. Dodging one of the lighting guys chatting on his cell phone, I hurriedly pressed the up button calling for the elevator. Maybe giving her the multi-colored flowers would prove that I paid attention to more than just her body. That to me, Molly was special and not a costar or sex-for-hire woman.
When the ding sounded indicating I arrived at our floor, I took a deep breath and gave the flowers a firm shake watching more grains of dirt hit the burgundy and beige printed carpet.
I slid the keycard out of my back pocket, waited for the click, and walked in. The curtains were drawn, and the only light in the room was the small lamp next to the bed. Molly sat with arms wrapped around her knees, wearing black yoga pants, a pale yellow hoodie, and her damp hair twisted on top of her head in a knot. She was completely lost in thought as she stared at the blank screen of the television.
Not wanting to startle her, I silently closed the door, held the flowers behind my back, and took a small step toward her. After a long moment of silence, her gaze swung my way. It was then I extended my arm and presented her with the bouquet... roots and all.
“Hi,” I said letting my lips slightly curl up at the corners. She furrowed her brows and stared at the flowers in my hand. “These are for you. I’m sorry for storming out, Molly.”
She nodded and finally reached to take the blooms from me bringing her nose close to them and inhaled. When she pulled her head back to look at them noticing their frayed stems she laughed. A sound that was so melodic it caused my heart to bang against my chest.
“Thank you. They’re beautiful.”
“Can we talk?” She nodded and scooted over on the mattress giving me room to sit next to her. “You’re an enigma.” Molly’s head tilted to the side like a puppy trying to decipher a command. “I’ve never felt so confused before by a woman.” She arched one brow forcing me to amend that statement. “Or anyone.”
“You’re the enigma, Trent. Not me.” I took the flowers from her and set them on the nightstand. Taking her hands in mine, I threaded our fingers together.
“Molly, like I’ve told you, I’ve wanted you long before you agreed to be my fluffer. Yes, I pay you, and I need you on set, but this room...” I moved my head to the left and right before locking my eyes with hers, “is not a movie set. The contract I had you sign does not include us having sex. Anything sexual between us is just that... between us. But, there had never ever been a time when I considered you my whore and truth be told, knowing you think that hurts. Do you honestly feel that way?”
She shook her head while her beautiful baby blues stared at me absorbing everything I had said. “Good, because that couldn’t be further from the truth.” Her eyes softened just a bit before tears blurred them. “I don’t want you to cry or feel one ounce of remorse being with me. When you kissed me before, everything I had hoped for since I first laid eyes on you came to the forefront of my mind. I finally thought you wanted to be with me as much as I did you. Was I wrong?”
Silently I prayed she didn’t say that I was. I needed her to admit that not only to me but herself. She inhaled on a sniff and shook her head. “No, you weren’t wrong. I did want to make love to you.” Make love... not have sex. In my world, that was a major difference. “But, I can’t help but feel the need to guard my heart. You’re gorgeous and extremely talented... and it’s because of that, amongst other things, that scares me.”
“What other things?” Molly’s head lowered not wanting to look me in the eyes. I released her hand and brought mine to cup her chin until those baby blues were back where I wanted them. “Tell me, what things?”
“Women. You sleep with other women for a living.”
“You knew that before we had sex. I also told you, being a porn star wasn’t my dream job. I failed at getting a script that would afford me the same lifestyle as the one pornography gave me. But it pays the bills while giving me a comfortable life. Doing a toothpaste commercial wouldn’t even pay my cell phone bill for six months.”
“Speaking of,” Molly interrupted with a smile and a lift of her dainty finger. “Yours has been ringing since you left.”
My eyes cut to where I had left it on the side table. “It’s probably Jerry. He’ll get over it.” I paused until I had her attention again. “Molly, I can’t change how you feel about what I do for a living. I can, however, change how you feel toward me. Let’s forget my job, your role in it, and why we’re here.” Tentatively, I took her hand between both of mine. “Instead, can we just get to know each other? Can we do that?”
Her eyes focused on my face followed by a long pause. “Yes, we can.”