Rage

I DON’T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED a month and a half ago to make Keegan leave. All I know is I got to spend one amazing night with her and then she disappeared as soon as I fell asleep. Ever since then, I’ve been searching all over for her.

“Rage, you still haven’t found your girl?” Tank asks, coming up to sit with me.

“No. Why do you want to know?” I ask, snapping at him.

“I might have figured out what happened. I overheard some of the girls talkin’.”

“What did they say? Do they know where she is?” I ask, perking up for the first time since she left.

“I don’t know where she is, but I know why she left. Apparently, when you got off you screamed out Storm’s name. Not hers,” he tells me, letting me have a minute to absorb that information.

I sit there and think about that night. Keegan was as perfect as I knew she would be. There’s times I like it a little rough and Keegan wanted me to give her what I had in me to give. She not only wanted it, but she pushed back just as hard. When I finally lost control, I remember calling out a name. I just don’t remember… Fuck! I did call out Storm’s name.

“I’m guessin’ by the look on your face that you remember doin’ it,” Tank says, seeing what no one wants him to see

“I did call out her name. What the fuck am I supposed to do now? There’s only four weeks to go until Sam and her dad come lookin’ for her. If they haven’t already found her.”

“I don’t know what to tell you. The only one that is gonna know where she is will be Whitney or Sami. I’m not even sure she told them where she is.”

“I need to find out,” I say, getting up and starting for the door.

Whitney should be home, but they’ve been working on opening up the bakery and store. It’s the afternoon, so I know she’s not at the diner. Making my way over to her house, I hope she can give me good news. I need to know where Keegan is and explain who Storm is. I’m sure the girls have already told Whitney.

Knocking on the door, I can hear laughter and talking coming from the back of the house. So, I make my way out there to see if it’s Whitney or Sami. Rounding the corner, I see Whitney and the rest of the old ladies. This is going to be an interesting conversation to have in front of everyone. But, if it means keeping Keegan safe and getting her back then I’ll suck it up and do it.

“What do you want Rage?” Bailey asks me.

“I need to talk to Whitney,” I respond.

“About what?” Whitney asks. “Keegan?”

“Yeah.”

“And why would I talk to you about her after you chased her away? You made her leave and she’s not coming back. Because you don’t know who you want. She’s not one to play games with.”

“I’m not playin’ games. Storm has been on my mind because of the way I feel about Keegan. If the girls have filled you in, then you know who Storm is. If not, then Storm is someone that used to be around the club. She was killed and is no longer around. We were close, but we didn’t make it past a friendship. So, Keegan is bringin’ up things that I don’t want to feel right now. Especially with the threat of her dad and Sam.”

“They told me who Storm is. And, I’ve already tried to tell Keegan that. As far as she’s concerned though, you still want Storm and are going to be chasing her until the day you die. She’s always going to be the one you want.”

“That’s not true at all,” I tell them. “Keegan is the one that I want. She’s the one that’s makin’ me feel the way I do. Every day, when I’m not on club business, I’m starin’ at the picture of the two of us that Kasey took. I see myself spendin’ my life gettin’ to know her. Whitney, if you know where she is, please tell me. I’m beggin’ you,” I tell her, not bothering to hide the fact that I’m pleading with her. Hell, I’ll get down on my knees if I have to.

“All I’m gonna say is call Slim. And if you think about fucking her over, I’ll beat the shit out of you. Well, I’ll try to anyway,” Whitney tells me. “I’m serious when I say don’t fuck with her. Rage, I want her here with us. She needs to be around her family.”

“I give you my word. Thank you, Whitney.”

I make my way back to the clubhouse so that I can call Slim. If he knows where she is then that means she’s in Benton Falls. There’s only one reason she would know about them and that’s because the girls knew she was leaving. It kind of pisses me off that no one said anything to me. Especially when they knew how hard I was searching for her.

I’ve talked to Slim and Grim. I’m now packing Kasey and I up to head to Benton Falls for a few days. We’re going to surprise Keegan and make sure that she comes home with us. She needs to hear a few things regarding Storm. Am I playing dirty by taking Kasey with me? Absolutely! Do I care at this point? Nope. I want to get Keegan back to the house and get back on track with where we were heading. If I have to grovel and beg her for forgiveness, then that’s what I’ll do. There’s not much I won’t do to make sure my girl comes home where she belongs.

“Daddy, are we bringing Keegan home?” Kasey asks me, pulling her bag behind her.

“Yeah sweet pea, we are,” I tell her.

“Good. I miss her. She’s fun daddy.”

“I miss her too,” I tell my daughter honestly. “Now, we’re gonna have a long drive, so do you want books or anythin’?”

“I got them daddy. I’m ready to go.”

Kasey and I make our way out to the truck. I fasten her in and see Grim and Bailey making their way towards us. I really don’t want to talk to anyone right now, but he is my President, so I need to hear what he has to say.

“If you see anythin’, you let Slim know and then call me. Is that understood?” he asks me.

“I will. My main priority is to protect these two with everythin’ I am.”

“Are you sure about this, Rage?” Bailey asks me.

“I am. I know it hasn’t been a long time, but I know it in my heart that Keegan is the one for me. The way that Irish feels about Whitney is the same way I feel about Keegan.”

“And what about Keegan. Does she feel the same?” she asks.

“I think she does. We’re about to find out, aren’t we?”

“Let us know when you get there, Rage,” Grim tells me.

I nod in acknowledgment and get in the truck. Bailey kisses and hugs Kasey goodbye before we can finally be on our way to our future. There’s no way that I’ll accept anything less than Keegan coming back with us. This is where she belongs and it’s up to me to bring her back.

Keegan

The night I spent with Rage was one of the best I’ve ever had. Well, up until he called out another woman’s name. Whitney and the rest of the girls have tried to explain to me who Storm was, but I’m not hearing it. There’s no way I can compete with a ghost. I won’t be anyone’s second choice. I’ve spent too many years running and hiding to be made to feel less than what I am. I know what I’m worth and one day someone will see that.

Slim and his club have been amazing. Bailey and Whitney were the first two to know that I was leaving. Bailey made the arrangements for me to come and stay with the Phantom Bastards. It’s been a blast. Wood and Boy Scout have been by my side since I got here.

At first, I thought something was off with them. We went out a few times and I saw them checking out the girls. That’s not the strange part. The part that confused me in the beginning was overhearing them talking about sharing women. I thought they had some bisexual relationship going on. Which I don’t have a problem with at all. They explained to me that they share women and not one another. It’s never been physical between them. It’s just them sharing one woman. Trust me, I’m very interested in finding out what that’s all about. Too bad Rage won’t leave my mind.

“So, are we gonna play cards or what Keegan?” Boy Scout asks me.

“Yeah. Let me just get the cookies from the oven and I’ll be right in.”

A few nights a week, the guys and I play cards, watch movies, or just hang out talking. That’s after they’ve spent all day standing guard. On these nights, I either cook for them or we order takeout. It’s a blast and I usually end up in fits of laughter. Especially the night they tried to talk me into going to a club with them. They wanted to go find a piece of ass and decided that I’d make the perfect wingman. I’m not sure why, but they were hilarious in their attempts. It also didn’t hurt that Slim vetoed the idea when he said that I shouldn’t be exposed when we didn’t know where my dad and Sam were hiding.

“What kind of cookies firefly?” Wood asks, bringing in beer for them and soda for me.

“Chocolate chip. Well, they’re not really cookies. So, you can’t touch the pan until I’m completely done with it. It’s gotta cool and then I add stuff to them.”

“You’re really gonna make us wait?” Boy Scout pouts.

“I know you’re pouting in there, Boy Scout. If you keep it up, you won’t get anything at all. Pull up your big boy pants and deal with it,” I tell him, letting the smile spread across my face.

I can hear Wood’s laughter and I know that Boy Scout is turning red. Yeah, he may be a badass biker, but he still blushes every now and then. It’s cute and endearing. Now I know that when I get in there, he’s going to do something to get pay back. These two are like brothers I never had and didn’t necessarily want.

Walking in to the living room, I see they’ve already set the table up and Wood is dealing the cards out. I’m guessing that we’re going to be playing our standard game of poker. Too bad I don’t know how to play. If we played strip poker, I’d be naked in a matter of seconds. Wood suggested that one night and I thought Boy Scout was going to choke on his beer. He was trying so hard not to laugh, but it didn’t necessarily work. Wood may have ended up covered in beer before too long.

“Poker again guys?” I ask.

“You know it,” Wood tells me, smiling his wolfish smile.

I sit down so we can play, and the guys take my mind off anything that may be on it. We play for an hour and a half and I finally decide to put Boy Scout out of his misery. Walking into the kitchen, I pull out the peanut butter and chocolate frosting. I made chocolate chip cookies into brownies. Now, I’m going to put a layer of peanut butter on them and then finish it off with chocolate frosting. Riley used to love these things. Kasey loves them too.

Boy Scout isn’t far behind me. He always keeps me company in the kitchen. Mainly because he wants to be the first one to get whatever I’m making. It doesn’t matter if I’m baking or cooking. If I’m honest, I think that if he had the choice, Wood wouldn’t get anything to eat while they’re here.

“Are they done yet?” Boy Scout asks, reminding me of an over-eager little boy waiting for a surprise.

“Almost. If you don’t calm down, I’m going to give the first piece to Wood and not you.”

“That’s not fair firefly,” he tells me, sitting down in the chair at the table. Wood isn’t far behind him.

Finally done, I cut them each a piece of the brownies. They gobble them down without taking a breath. I can’t help but double over in laughter at watching them eat. It’s like they haven’t eaten in days. Maybe months. I know for a fact that they had dinner because I had beef stew cooking in the crockpot all day. Then I made crescent rolls to go with it.

This is how my days now go. I almost wouldn’t change anything about it. But, Rage and Kasey aren’t here. They are the ones that I want to be spending my time with. I’m just not going to be some sort of replacement for him. He’s going to have to decide what he truly wants, then he can make a play for me. If that’s what he chooses.

Today, they’re taking me to the doctor. I haven’t been feeling very good and they want to make sure that no one’s tampered with anything I’ve come into contact with. Not only did I explain the situation, but Grim also called and talked to them. Thankfully, my dad hasn’t found me yet because I haven’t received any letters or flowers since I left Clifton Falls. I’m not sure if they’re still going there or not. Whitney hasn’t mentioned it and I haven’t asked.

“Firefly, are you ready to go?” Wood asks, coming in my room.

“Yeah. As ready as I’ll ever be I guess.”

“Boy Scout is waiting to lock up and arm the alarm system.”

We make our way outside and I get in the car I just bought. I’ve been working at the local restaurant and my tips and paychecks allowed me to buy a car. Especially when Slim won’t let me pay rent or anything else. We’ve had many arguments about it and I’ve lost every single time. I thought Rage was bossy, but he’s got nothing on Slim when he doesn’t want to budge on something. He takes bossy to whole new level. Shy is the only one I see that gives it right back to him. Those two are so funny to watch when they get going.

Wood has been driving my car while Boy Scout follows behind us. It gives me a peace of mind to know that I’m still being protected, but I can’t wait for the day that I can go out on my own without having to worry. When this is all done, I’ll be able to go out without having to look over my shoulder all the time. I won’t have to worry about those that I love and care about getting hurt just to get to me. Hopefully I get to see the day that it gets taken care of.

“Let me know if I have to pull over firefly,” Wood tells me.

There may have been an instance that I threw up in his truck. We were heading back from the clubhouse and I couldn’t wait. I had no time to tell him to pull over or to roll the window down. When he told me not to worry about cleaning his truck, I knew I couldn’t do that. So, the next day, I spent the entire day cleaning his truck out. He managed to get most of it done after making sure I got in bed. I just made sure to finish it and detail the rest of the truck while I was at it.

It doesn’t take that long to get to the doctor’s office. Thankfully. Wood follows me in while Boy Scout wait’s outside with the car. I go to the window and give them my name. The receptionist hands me a bunch of papers to fill out before giving her attention to the person behind me.

Walking over to Wood, I sit down to fill out the papers I’ve done dozens of times before. This is what I hate because I have to give my name and I don’t want to do anything that would cause my dad or Sam to find me. This time I’ll just have to suck it up and take my chances though. Two weeks of being sick is too long not to get checked out. At first, I thought I had caught the flu since it’s getting cold outside. Then I thought it could be from all the stress of not knowing when my dad and Sam will strike. Now, I don’t think it’s either of those things.

Before I’m done filling out all of the papers, which are repetitive I might add, a nurse calls me back. Wood stands up to follow me back and I go to stop him. Instead of sitting back down and waiting for me, he cocks an eyebrow and doesn’t say a word. I guess this is his way of letting me know that I’m not leaving his sight.

After doing everything the nurse asks me to do, I finally make it in to a room and sit on the table while Wood sit’s in the only chair in the room. She takes my vitals and then tells me to wait on the doctor. Before she makes it out of the room, I’m lunging for the garbage can. This is bullshit and I’m so tired from getting sick all the time. Hopefully today they can figure out what’s wrong and give me what I need to make this stop.

Wood holds my hair back and then helps me back on the exam table when I’m done getting sick. It always drains me, and I just want to take a nap. I’ll have to wait until I can get back to the house. As I lay back on the table, Wood finds paper towels that he wets down and puts on my forehead. This is the same stuff he does whenever he catches me getting sick. He’s such a sweetheart and I can’t wait until Boy Scout and him can find their own woman.

“Good morning Keegan,” the doctor says walking through the door. “I’m Doctor Sanchez.”

“Morning,” I mutter in reply.

“It says here that you haven’t been feeling very good for a few weeks. Let’s see what your chart says. Well, it looks like you don’t have the flu or anything. It looks like you’re pregnant,” she says, setting the chart down.

“What did you just say?” I ask, astonished beyond belief right now. “You must have someone else’s chart in your hand.”

“I’m sorry Keegan, this is definitely your chart. I take it this wasn’t expected,” she says, the sympathy pouring out of her.

“No, it wasn’t expected,” I tell her, looking over to Wood. “You can’t tell anyone. Promise me, Wood.”

“I can’t promise anythin’ firefly.”

“Why do you call me firefly?” I ask, even though this really isn’t the time to be talking about this.

“From the night you sat outside catchin’ fireflies when you first got here. I’ve never seen anyone sit there for hours tryin’ to catch them.”

“Well, it was more about thinking and trying to figure things out. Not necessarily about catching fireflies.”

Wood shrugs his shoulders and I know that I have a nickname from him and Boy Scout. I’m not sure if it’s going to catch on with anyone else for the club, but I’ll go with whatever right now. Doctor Sanchez explains what I’ll have to do during the rest of the pregnancy, gives me some pamphlets and scripts for vitamins and anti-nausea medicine, and then tells me she’ll see me in a month.

We walk back to the car and I can’t believe what I just found out. The one-time Rage and I are together, and I get pregnant. How the fuck does that happen to me? It must be something telling me to go back to Clifton Falls. There’s no way that I’m going to keep Rage’s baby from him. I guess we’re all getting what we want. Even if I’m scared shitless for multiple reasons.

No matter how much I fought against being with Rage, I’ve always wanted him. For once in my life I could see myself settling down and being with someone. Rage is the only one that brought that out in me. The only reason I left is because of him calling out Storm’s name. To me, it meant that he wanted someone else and I was just filling his time until she became his.

“You good firefly?” Wood asks as he helps me in my car.

“Um, I don’t honestly know. I think I just want to go to the house and take a nap. You guys can go do whatever it is you need to do.”

“No can do. We’ll be right by your side until you know what you wanna do,” he tells me, closing me in the car and heading to the driver’s side.

I’m still trying to wrap my head around the fact that I’m about to have a baby in a few months. Yeah, I’m probably only a month and a half pregnant, but I bet the next seven and a half months are going to fly by. Or, they’ll drag by because Rage is going to be a caveman and try to make me do what he wants me to do. I can see him trying to make me rest and do as little as possible for most of this pregnancy. Ha! That’s not going to happen.

When I laid down, I only wanted to sleep for a little bit. Waking up, I realize that I’ve slept for about four hours. Damn! Now, the day is gone and everything I wanted to do is going to have to be pushed to tomorrow. I guess tomorrow is going to be a busy as hell day.

Before I can register anything else, I have to run to the bathroom. Usually Wood comes rushing in when he can hear me getting sick. Today, the last person I ever thought would be here is by my side. Rage is holding my hair, rubbing my back, and letting the water run so he can give me a cool cloth. I can’t even question why he’s here right now.

Finally, I’m done, and Rage leads me back into the bedroom. I sit on the edge of the bed and look up at Rage. Damn, the man is even sexier than I remember. He’s looking down at me, concern written all over his face. Now, I know that I’m going to have to explain what’s going on. Fuck! Why can’t this day be over already? I don’t want to have to deal with this right now.

“Are you okay?” he asks me.

“Yeah. Nothing I haven’t been dealing with for a little bit now,” I tell him, trying to purposely be vague.

“What’s goin’ on Keegan? You used to tell me things.”

“I don’t want to tell you right now. I’ve barely wrapped my head around it and now you’re going to know. But, I can’t hide it from you either.”

Rage sits down next to me and waits for me to open up to him. This is hard. Especially when I don’t know how he’s going to react about having a baby. We’ve never talked about it and we never really talked about what was going to happen between us. Sure, he’s said that I was going to be in his life forever, or however he said it, but we never talked about what that meant. I guess that’s about to be discussed now too.

“So, I’m guessing that Wood told you I’ve been sick?” I ask him, not knowing how to start this conversation.

“He did. But, what I want to know is why you ran away? Especially without comin’ to me first.”

“You called out another woman’s name the one and only time we were together Rage. I don’t know hardly anything about you, yet you continue to tell me we’re going to be around one another for a long time. I don’t even know what that means. There’s too many what-ifs and I’m not going to be anyone’s second choice,” I tell him, feeling the tears building already.

“I know baby, and I’m sorry as fuck about it. Storm was a girl that was in the club as a club girl. Summer and her have helped the old ladies more than anyone else and we became close. When I brought Kasey home, she was one of the main ones that helped me out with her. I thought we were headin’ to somethin’ more than friends until she was killed. I went off the rails when she died and disappeared for a little while. Part of that was tryin’ to take out the people that took her out. The other part of that was losin’ control. I started drinkin’ and other shit just to numb myself from the pain. Kasey is the one that suffered,” he tells me. “The more time I spend with you, the more I realized that what I felt for Storm was nothin’. She had been on my mind a lot and that’s why I called out her name. It wasn’t because I want her still. I’m not chasin’ some ghost. I want you, and only you.”

I take in what he’s just told me, and I know that he’s not lying. It doesn’t mean that it doesn’t hurt any less, I just know that he’s confused. On one hand, he still wants to know what would’ve happened with Storm. On the other hand, he’s happy that she’s not here so he can explore whatever this is that we have. I would be confused as hell too. Especially if they were as close as what everyone is saying.

“Rage, I understand where you’re coming from. It’s just going to take some time for me to wrap my head around it. Can you understand that?” I ask.

“I get it baby. Now, why did Wood take you to the doctor? What’s goin’ on with you?” he asks. “I’m assumin’ it has somethin’ to do with you bein’ sick a little while ago.”

“It does. I haven’t been feeling too good lately and decided that I needed to get checked out. Well, it turns out that I’m going to be feeling like this for a little while.”

“What do you have baby?”

“I’m pregnant Rage. The one and only time we were together got me pregnant,” I tell him, waiting to hear what he’s going to say.

For a few minutes, he says absolutely nothing. Now, my mind is racing with all the possible thoughts going through his head. He probably thinks that I’m trying to trap him with a baby or something. That’s so far from the truth though. We were both there and I had as much responsibility for not using protection as he did. It never even crossed my mind honestly because I wanted him so bad in that moment.

“Okay. Well, I guess that certainly changes things a bit then,” he murmurs. “What are you goin’ to do?”

“I’m keeping the baby. You don’t have to be a part of its life. We don’t need to be together or anything. You know that I’m pregnant and we can figure out where to go from here. I’m perfectly capable of raising the baby on my own and you can visit him or her as much as you want to. I don’t want anything from you Rage,” I tell him, trying to sound as confident as I can.

“Yeah, I’m goin’ to be a part of the baby’s life alright. On an everyday basis Keegan. We’re goin’ to do this and be together. You’re comin’ home, do what you gotta do to wrap your head around that baby.”

I sit in stunned silence. In all honesty, I didn’t think that Rage was going to be all gun ho about us being together. And, I’m sure as hell not going to be with him because of the baby. No matter how hot the sex might get. We’re going to have to take some time and figure out if this is what we truly want. Just as I go to tell him my feelings on the matter, I hear footsteps running down the hall towards us.

“Kasey, why don’t you let your dad and firefly talk for a little bit. Then they’ll come out and play with you,” I hear Wood say.

“Who is firefly?” Rage and Kasey ask at the same time.

“Keegan’s nickname from me is firefly,” he says, entering the doorway.

“And why the fuck are you givin’ my girl a nickname?” Rage asks, letting the anger show.

“Um…Well, you weren’t here, and she sat outside collectin’ fireflies in a jar for hours,” he answers like it’s no big deal.

“If anyone is givin’ her a name, it’s gonna be me,” Rage says, getting off the bed and heading towards Wood. “Kasey, why don’t you go see Boy Scout for a few minutes sweet pea?”

“Is Wood in trouble daddy? You have your mean face on.”

“We’re just gonna have a chat,” Rage tells his sweet little girl.

“Okay. I’m gonna have Boy Scout push me on the swing out back.”

With that, Kasey goes running off to find Boy Scout. I stay rooted to the bed and wait to see what’s going to happen between Wood and Rage. This isn’t going to end well for him if Rage is anything like Crash and Trojan. But, I’m going to let them settle it between themselves. If I’ve learned anything, it’s to let the men do what they do and then sort it all out after the fact. This situation is no different.

“Now, even if I weren’t around, what makes you think you can give her a nickname? You better make it good Wood,” Rage says, taking the last few steps towards him.

“Listen, no disrespect meant Rage. She ended up sittin’ out there for hours thinkin’ of nothin’ but you and how much she was missin’ you. Yes, Keegan, I know that’s exactly what you were doin’. I don’t know why I started callin’ her firefly, I just did and now I barely call her Keegan. I’m sorry Rage.”

“You’re lucky that I like you and I think you receive enough abuse from Crash and Trojan. Otherwise, I’d be beatin’ the livin’ fuck out of you right now. I might even start callin’ her that myself. I kind of like that name for her.”

Rage actually shocks the shit out of me. I figured he was going to beat the shit out of Wood and now he’s going to start calling me firefly too. Who would’ve thought that someone else giving me a nickname would stick with so many people? I certainly didn’t. Just like I have no clue how Wood knew I was sitting there pining away for Rage when I never opened my mouth about him to anyone here. Word must travel fast through these clubs.

“Now that we have the pissing match out of the way. There’s a little girl that wants some attention. And please, I want to keep this between the three of us for right now. After what I told you happened before Rage, I don’t want to jinx anything.”

“Whatever you want firefly,” Rage answers. Oh boy!

“I won’t say a word to anyone. I don’t need Rage beatin’ the shit out of me.”

The three of us make our way out to the back of the house where Boy Scout and Kasey are. She’s swinging and giggling without a care in the world. Boy Scout is laughing with her and it’s like he hasn’t laughed in years. I’ve never seen him so relaxed and at peace. Six weeks is a long time to go without seeing him like that. But, he’s been on guard duty and has taken that seriously. Almost as bad as Rage has been with me.

“Keegannnnnn!” Kasey hollers. “Come play with me. I’ve missed you so much!”

“I’ve missed you too sweetheart,” I tell her making my way to the swings.

Rage follows me over and I know that he’s going to be the one to push me on the swing. He’s not going to let anyone else get close to me now that he’s here. This should be interesting. Wood just hangs back and pulls up a chair, so he can keep an eye on things while we’re having fun.

“Daddy, can you get Keegan higher than me?” Kasey asks. “I bet you can’t!”

“Is that a challenge sweet pea?”

“Yep.”

I don’t know if my stomach will let me go as high as Rage is going to push me, but we’ll find out. Hopefully, if I have to get sick, I can at least make it to the bathroom so Kasey doesn’t have to see it. I don’t need her getting upset or worried because she thinks I’m sick. And, I’m going to follow Rage’s lead as far as when she gets told we’re having a baby. She’s his daughter and he needs to make that decision.

“You ready for this firefly?” he asks, pulling the swing back.

“I don’t know how high I can go Rage. Just take that into consideration. I don’t want to get sick in front of her,” I let him know quietly.

“I know baby. I got you.”

Rage acts like he’s going to give me one hell of a push. Instead he just lets me go and I start swinging at the same pace as Kasey. She’s laughing so hard that Rage isn’t making me go higher than her and I can’t help but join in the laughter. Unfortunately, my stomach chooses this moment to have other ideas about what I need to be doing. So, I quickly stop the swing and make a beeline for the house. I can hear Kasey asking what’s wrong and Rage making up a story.

Thankfully, I make it to the bathroom in time and it’s not long before Rage makes his way in to me. Just like before, he takes care of me. It’s the little things he does that make him so special. And I know that he’s not like this with everyone. Sure, there’s loyalty and respect with his brothers and their old ladies. But, the sweet soft side is reserved for Kasey and me. It’s just taken me a little bit to see that.

“I think I’m good now,” I tell him, hauling myself up off the floor.

After brushing my teeth, we make our way back outside and I sit in the seat that Wood vacated at some point. Kasey is still swinging, and Boy Scout is still pushing her. Rage takes a seat next to me and I know that he’s worried already about me being sick. There’s nothing I can do about it though. Not until I go back to the doctor in a month. I’ll just take the pills she gave me and hope they help control the nausea a little bit. Anything at this point would be better than feeling the way I do.

“You good firefly?” Rage asks me.

“Yeah. I’m just really tired again. It takes a lot out of me and I just want to take a nap.”

“So, go take one. Kasey has her stuff in one of the spare bedrooms already. I’m sleepin’ in your room. We’re fine to hang out while you get some sleep,” he tells me, kissing the back of my hand.

“Are you sure? I should be fine in a little bit.”

“Go. We’ll order somethin’ for dinner and make sure to save you some. I know how these two can eat.”

After giving him a kiss and telling Kasey that I’ll see her in a little bit, I head inside. Wood is standing in the kitchen, holding a glass of water for me. He’s so used to taking care of me after a month and a half that it’s just second nature to him. Plus, I think he wants to make sure that Rage knows I have options out there. And if he doesn’t watch his step, there will be someone that wants to take his place. Not that I’d let that happen, but it’s nice to know that Wood cares.

Once again, I’ve slept for longer than I wanted to. I can hear everyone in the living room talking and laughing. It sounds like there’s more than just the four that were here when I came in for a nap. Not that I want to hang out with a lot of people right now. I guess it is what it is, and I don’t have much of a choice. So, I make myself look presentable and head out there.

“There’s sleepin’ beauty,” Boy Scout says.

I give everyone a slight smile and head into the kitchen. There’s pizza, wings, and cheesy garlic bread on the counter and I help myself to some of it. Slim, Playboy, and Killer are here, and I wonder what’s going on. Other than a check-in every now and then, I haven’t seen Slim or anyone else from the club. Hell, I won’t even go to the clubhouse. I’ve been there two times in the month and a half I’ve been here. The first time was when I arrived in Benton Falls, and the other one was when Wood had to run there really quick.

“So, what did I miss?” I ask, leaning against Rage and taking my first bite of pizza.

“Nothin’ much firefly,” Slim says.

He starts laughing when I about choke on my food and my eyes bug out at his use of my nickname. Rage is frantically pounding on my back to make sure that I don’t choke, and the rest of the men are standing around looking at the crazy chick. Who knew the President of an MC would be calling me a name Wood started. Yep, it’s definitely going to be sticking for sure now.

“You good baby?” Rage asks finally.

“Yeah. Just a shock is all.”

“So, we were just talkin’ and tryin’ to figure out what your plans are,” Slim tells me.

Fuck! I haven’t had a chance to really decide what I wanted to do yet. Rage obviously is going to have to go back home but I don’t know what I want. Honestly, my entire family is back in Clifton Falls. Whitney, Irish, and their kids are the only people I consider to be my family. The girls are back there. Here, there’s not really any old ladies for me to talk to or get to know. So, I’ve been sticking to myself.

“Um…Do I have to decide right this second?” I ask after swallowing the mouthful of food.

“No. But, I’m goin’ to let you know that the flowers are comin’ here now too. Not sure how they found you, but they did. Boy Scout intercepted the delivery this mornin’.”

“What’s the card say?” I ask, the color draining from my body and the food I was eating threatening to come back up. “I need to know.”

“Just tell her Slim. It’s somethin’ she feels she needs to know. So, I don’t put up too much fight about it.”

Slim reaches in his pocket and pulls the envelope out. With shaking hands, I take the card and just hold it for a minute. Even though I need to know what my father is saying, I don’t want to know. It’s been six weeks and I can just imagine what he’s saying on this one. Finally, I decide that I can’t put it off any longer and pull the card out. Before I open it up, I look around at the men in the room and gather strength from them.

Keegan,

You have wasted half of the time Sam gave you to come to him on your own. Instead, you up and disappear again. You’re making us waste valuable resources to continually track you down, and Sam is done playing games. He’s ready to cut your time down and make you come to him now. I’m going to say you have about a week left before we get you. This could’ve been so much easier for everyone if you just did what you were told to do.

Sincerely,

Your Loving Father

If he thinks that I’m letting them come take me away, they’ve got another thing coming. I’ll run again and hide before I let that happen. These guys have no clue who they’re dealing with. Carl and my uncle were pussies compared to Sam. Who do they think started this whole selling young girls to settle debts? It wasn’t Carl or anyone else. Sam has been through about ten girls so far. And that was the last number I heard years ago.

“What’s goin’ through your head firefly?” Rage asks, wrapping his arms tight around me.

“Needing to run is at the top of the list. But, I’m not going to. I’m going to trust in you and the club to protect me.”

“Good girl,” Rage says.

“So, where are you gonna be livin’? I only ask because either we’re goin’ back with you, or they’re comin’ here,” Slim says.

“What do you mean?” Rage asks.

“I mean, we don’t know exactly what we’re dealing with. From the intel we got, he’s worse than we first thought. So, I talked to Grim and we decided that at least two clubs need to be present. Gage’s club is busy dealin’ with whatever Darcy has goin’ on right now.”

“What’s going on with her?” I ask. I’ve only met her once or twice, but she’s a sweet girl.

“No one knows for sure. She’s bein’ tight-lipped about it,” Slim answers. “All we know is somethin’ ain’t right and they might need backup but we’re more worried about you right this second.”

“It’s up to firefly,” Rage tells me. “I’m gonna need to go back soon, and I really don’t want to leave you. But, if the club comes here I won’t have to leave. So, it’s your call.”

Way to leave this shit up to me! I have no clue what to do now. I mean, in Clifton Falls most of the families live behind the fence. Here, they don’t have that. So, maybe it would be safer for us to go back there. Or maybe they have more gun power or something here. Fuck!

“Well, all I can say is that I think it should be up to you guys. You know who’s better equipped. So, I’ll go where you think the better place is.”

“Then we’ll head out in two hours back to Clifton Falls,” Slim says. “That give you enough time to pack your stuff firefly?”

“Yeah. It’s mainly clothes because I don’t have anything else. I always had to travel light.”

Everyone heads out except for Boy Scout. They wanted to leave more, but they all need to get ready to head out. Boy Scout said that Wood can take care of his stuff for him and he’ll stand outside and make sure no one tries anything. Rage is in my room with me while Kasey makes sure all of her stuff is packed back up. Not that she had a lot of time to get anything out.

“You okay baby?” Rage asks, helping me pack my meager belongings up.

“Yeah. I mean as good as I can be with everything going on right now. I’m sorry this is coming to you guys. I should’ve made you let me go as soon as my uncle left.”

“Wouldn’t have happened. You should know that by now.”

“I do know that. I’m just saying that me being around you all is bringing a ton of danger to you. It’s not fair to everyone.”

Rage holds me close for a few minutes. We don’t talk or anything. I just listen to the beating of his heart and let it calm me down. He’s the only one that can calm me when I feel like my world is crashing down around me. I’m not sure if it’s because he got me out of the back of that car, or if it’s because of whatever connection we have. All I know is that when he’s holding me, all is right with the world.

“Let’s get finished so we can head out. I want you back at the clubhouse before it gets too late. And you know you’re goin’ to have to answer questions about why you’re sick, right?”

“I know. I’ll just avoid them if I can. Say I ate something bad?”

“Don’t think that will work when you barely eat. I noticed you only had a few bites and then quit eatin’. That’s not gonna fly with me firefly. Especially with you carryin’ our baby,” Rage says.

Before we know it, there’s a gasp coming from the door. We both whip our heads around and see Kasey standing there. She’s heard that I’m having a baby and has a huge smile across her face. There’s a twinkle in her eyes and I know she’s excited.

“I’m gonna be a big sister?” she asks, coming in the room farther.

“You are,” Rage answers. “But, you can’t tell anyone. Can you help us keep this secret?”

“Yeah daddy. But why can’t we tell?”

“Well, we just found out and we want to keep it to ourselves for a little bit. I promise when we want everyone to know, you can tell them,” I tell Kasey.

She runs in and wraps her arms around our legs. This right here is what I’ve always longed for. I knew it would never happen if I was with Sam. Hopefully it doesn’t get ripped away from me now that I’ve finally found Rage and Kasey.