Chapter 9
When I returned home that evening, there were a million things running through my mind. I had never been so happy in my entire life and instead of focusing on what I was unsure of, I allowed myself to be excited for once.
However, from the moment I walked in the door, I knew that something was amiss. Before I even saw my parents, waiting for me in the living room with a stern look of disapproval etched into their faces, I felt all my bliss be sucked out of me.
Immediately, my stomach churned with nervousness and I felt my defenses rise, readying for a fight.
“Where have you been all day?” My father demanded.
“I was out with Anthony,” I answered solidly as I easily placed my key on the hook and slid my purse off my shoulder, as if I was ignorant to their anger.
“Of course, you were!” My father muttered, “You’ve been getting real cozy with that damn yankee, haven’t you?”
“Why would you do this to us?” My mother chimed in, sounding more hurt than angry.
“Do what?” I demanded, narrowing my eyes in protest, “You were the one who wanted me to take a more active role in being an adult and I happen to like Anthony.”
“You betrayed us!” My father screamed, barreling toward me with bulging eyes and a red face of fury.
“What are you talking about?” I demanded, standing my ground against him, refusing to back down. “I have never done anything to betray you,” I insisted, even though rebelling did play a part in my initial interest in Anthony.
“This is just another way to illicit attention,” my mother insisted, standing slightly behind my father, as though trying to show her support.
“No, but it’s a great way not to get stuck in this one-horse town, like our family is some kind of ancient relic that is stationary…You know, money does spend other places.”
“This is our home!” My mother insisted indignantly.
“But that doesn’t mean it has to be mine,” I retorted, “At least not forever. What’s so bad about wanting to explore the world?”
“Because you explore it in all the wrong ways! You’re still just a child…” My father insisted.
“No, I’m not.”
“See? It’s that yankee. He’s putting all kinds of terrible stuff into her head,” My mother hissed, grasping my father’s arm as though drawing conviction from him.
“This has nothing to do with him! You’re just blaming him…I’ve always wanted to leave. I’ve always wanted to leave this town. You just never listened.”
“You are a lady, Sahara…a southern lady and I will be damned if you run off with some carpetbagger… I don’t care how much money he has!”
“You just don’t like him,”
“You’re damn straight I don’t like him,” my father spat, “All he’s done since he’s got here is strung us along and filled your head with ideas that he’s never going to make good on.”
“He hasn’t strung you along and he hasn’t promised me anything!” I insisted, “I don’t even know what the specifics of your stupid business plan is! All I know is that you need an investor to do whatever it is you want to do. He’s your lifeline, so I’d be a lot nicer to him if I were you.”
“This is my house! This is my business and it’s my money!” My father insisted, now growing angrier from the challenge he perceived. “I’ve survived without this bastard and I’ll survive after he leaves. There’s nothing that he can offer me that I can’t get anywhere else!”
“Then do it! Break off your business deal with him…”
“No, Sahara. You are forbidden to see him again! We will conclude our business and he is going to leave. You are never going to see him again.”
Anger coursed through me. Now, I was the one who felt betrayed.
“Dad,” I replied, aghast but trying to keep my voice at an even keel, “fist of all, you have absolutely no idea what you’re talking about and secondly,” at this, I lost my already simmering temper, enraged by the fact that they were still trying to control me, “I am an adult! Like it or not, you can’t dictate who I can and can’t see!”
With that, I spun around, grabbing my keys, and clutching my purse, heading for the door when I heard my father growl with rage, “Fine!” He screamed, “If you’re going to be a whore, you might as well make it worth our while!”
Before even a second thought, I whipped around to glare at my father. It was in that moment that I realized he was no one to respect and no one to listen to. I knew that I should have turned around and ran before the situation escalated but I couldn’t believe that I had heard him correctly.
“Excuse me?” I hissed, taking a step toward him.
By now, my mother had backed away from my father, trying to distance herself from his rant. She didn’t say anything, but I was certain she was unhappy with where he was going with this.
“You heard me!” He insisted, too fired up to back down, “If you’re going to jump his bones, why the hell won’t you at least pillow talk him into closing this deal for us. Do something worthwhile when you open your legs for once.”
“Dear Lord, Raymond!” My mother exclaimed but neither my father or myself paid her any mind.
“How dare you!” I screamed, “You obviously don’t know a thing about me or about Anthony!”
“I know enough,” he screamed, “I know that the only reason a man like that would want her is so that he could have leverage in the deal. So, now I’m asking for my leverage. Where’s your loyalty to your family?”
“What the hell is the matter with you?” I demanded but realized as I was speaking that I didn’t care. Whatever his answer was didn’t matter to me. So, without waiting for a response, I turned around and stormed out of the house.
As soon as I slammed the door, I was running to my car.
Tears were flooding my eyes and my breath was audible.
I heard my father call out into the night, but my mind was long past him and my mother, for letting him speak to me like that. She might not have liked what he was saying but she sure as hell didn’t do anything to stop him and so, I was finished with both of them.
As I turned the key in the ignition and peeled out of the long driveway, I wondered what had taken me so long to realize that was how they truly felt?
While I drove, millions of signs leading up to tonight flooded my memory and in hindsight, they were all so obvious.
The problem with my life wasn’t that I lived in a small town or that my family had money that they didn’t earn. It was that my parents never intended to let me live my own life. It didn’t matter whether I was an adult, or not. If I had continued to keep up appearances and maintain a relationship with my family, I was never going to have the chance to live my own life.
With that epiphany, I was set. I no longer wanted any part of my parents, or Anthony.
As I reached the hotel where Anthony was staying and stormed up to his room, I had two distinct goals paving my intentions. The first, was to ruin my parents’ deal with Anthony completely and the second was to make Mr. Shields leave this shitty little town and never come back.