Chapter Seventeen
THEA
Thea was deep in her dream, completely lost in a world that wasn’t the one she’d left when she’d passed out.
Her entire body felt like it was being ripped apart when she fought with the voice to spare Cam. It had screamed at Thea to let it drain him, to kill him, and get him out of the way. But Thea held onto every ounce of control and discipline she had to stop it from happening. She knew for sure that this wasn’t just a dream when she felt so much physical feeling in her body; fighting with the Powers, the epic fight with Cam and the drop onto his balcony—it all confirmed everything was real. And if it was real, there was no way she could let anything happen to Cam. With a roar that echoed painfully in her mind, she had fallen, with a swoop, into darkness.
The next thing she knew, she was in her childhood bedroom.
She sat crossed-legged on the small and ragged bed, draped in a long nightgown and staring at the door.
She was waiting for something, but not sure what. She only knew it was extremely important and that she had to be quiet and wait patiently, like a good Nephilim.
After what seemed like a long time, the doorknob turned and she straightened. When it opened, a woman entered—the same woman she had seen before, the one who had been the shadow. Thea stared at her as she floated into the room. She seemed unreal; her skin glowed, her hair rested perfectly around her face and her lilac gown was elegant and flowing. She looked stunning, and the sight of her stirred a deep recognition within Thea. Warmth, power, and feelings of trust and hope enveloped her as the woman came close.
The woman approached the bed and sat next to Thea taking her hands in her own. The woman's skin too hot, almost uncomfortable.
‘Thea, listen to me,’ the woman said, though her mouth didn't move. The voice was directly inside of Thea's mind, filling her skull with a vibration that was both soothing and irritating. ‘You're so powerful now. You need to make careful choices.’
Thea couldn't respond. It was as though the woman's presence had immobilized and mesmerized her.
‘Everyone in your life has hurt you in some way, Thea,’ the woman continued. ‘Especially Cam. He's disappointed you over and over again. He has lied to you. He has put you in danger constantly. He's hurt you when he promised he wouldn’t. Cam doesn't love or care about you at all.’
Thea fought hard against the woman's mesmerizing effect. "That's not true," she managed to say out loud, her voice bursting through the blanket of paralysis. "He's done so much for me. More than I could ever do for him."
‘My, you are a strong one,’ the woman marveled.
Feelings of pride rose in Thea but she pushed them down, knowing they were false.
‘Do you know what your beloved Cam is doing right now?’ the woman asked. ‘He is negotiating to use you as a weapon in the Demon Realm.’
"N-N-no," Thea stuttered. "That's not true!"
The woman laughed, sweet and soft. ‘Listen for yourself.’
“I just need more time to encourage Thea to reject the demon. If I can reach her, I can help her.” That was Cam's voice. “And in the Demon Realm, that would be useful. She would be a powerful weapon for us in the heart of their Realm.”
Thea tried not to let her heart sink. Even if what she was hearing was true, there could be a good reason. Cam always made good decisions.
‘Did he make a good decision when he took the Legion task force assignment?’ The woman asked, her voice embracing a hard bitterness. ‘Did he make a good decision when he refused to heal himself from his pain? Did he make a good decision when he cut you? Right now he is intending to come back in here and trick you into fighting against me.’
Thea tried to shrug off the feelings of doubt crowding her. "Who are you?"
The woman leaned forward and placed a blazing palm on Thea's cheek. ‘I am your mother.’
Thea's head spun, and the resistance that she had been holding onto slipped from her.
‘Come to me, Thea,’ the woman said. ‘You are strong enough. Come to me and get the answers you have always wanted. You don't need Cam. You don't need any of them.’
With no resistance left, her mother's words rooted into the core of her being and she agreed.
‘Good, let's go.’
Thea woke, shivering. She climbed out of Cam's bed and headed for the door but paused when she heard voices on the other side. Looking around, she headed back to the bedroom.
‘Out of the window,’ said her mother. ‘Use your power.’
Thea headed to one of the windows and placed both palms on the glass. Focusing, she sent a hot smoldering energy into the window, shattering it. Shifting into her angel-form, she jumped out and hurdled across the Angel Realm towards the nearest portal.
‘Don't be distracted by anything you see,’ her mother warned. ‘Keep going, I'll direct you.’
Although Thea felt completely in control of her body now, she had the feeling it was a false perception. If she refused to do anything her mother wanted, she would probably be forced.
She ignored the flurry of movement she could see in her peripheral vision and dove through a portal back into the human world and back into her old neighborhood.
‘Head to the main square.’
Thea flew as quickly as she could to the main square, keeping an eye around her for any angels heading her way but none seem to be. As she approached the square, the voice directed her to a nearby alley. It was pretty unremarkable, but as she walked down it, she heard voices.
"… fucking her like he was trying to get out of hell."
A throaty chuckle and a high-pitched laugh rose into the air. "When do you think she's gonna come round to us?"
"Maybe when—"
Thea slowed down as she saw two tiny beings leaning against one of the walls. They were deformed, little creatures with shaved heads and bare feet. Their skin was a slimy metal gray and their eyes were large and bright. They wore no clothes other than a scrap of underwear that was bulging from its contents.
‘Don't worry about these goblins,’ said the voice in her mind. ‘They’re a little sex obsessed. They shouldn't give you any trouble.’
They stopped speaking as she approached them.
"Well, look at this one," said one of them, appreciatively. "Nephilim, unmated, only had sex once in the last couple years."
"That can't be right. Look at her, she's definitely being fucked regularly."
The first one was about to respond when he froze. "She can see us. Shit! She can see us!"
Thea slowed to a stop behind them, unsure what to say but the voice did. "Calm down!" she snapped. "It's me. Let me through."
Their big eyes opened even wider, and they stuttered and almost fell over themselves. It would have been comical if they weren't so disgusting.
"Of course, of course," one of them gushed. "We didn't realize it was you, mistress, please forgive us."
Still gushing, they moved to stand about two feet apart. They placed both of their hands on the wall at the same time, fingers facing each other. A strip of light flicked to life between their hands, and Thea's body began to move forward without her instruction.
She stepped through the beaming light and into the Demon Realm.
***
She stood in a city of metallic buildings of all colors. They rose up; different heights and widths, their gleaming tones creating an odd unity. In the distance, there was one building that stretched higher than any other. Made of a shiny golden material, it was shaped like a cone and shone brightly against the silvery, rose, bronze, emerald, and gray buildings that surrounded it. The cloudless sky was a midnight blue that stretched over the city, offering no stars or moon. In the far distance, through a misty silvery fog, the outline of enormous mountains was just about visible.
Thea didn't have time to look and examine her surroundings further. She walked as her mother directed, heading deeper into the city, down winding roads and crossing busy squares. Surprisingly, the Demon Realm was filled with people. They walked in groups, they lounged about, they laughed, chatted, and hung out in various areas of the Realm in good moods. They didn’t look like demons. In fact, they looked like large humans of all shapes, sizes and colors. No one spoke to her or barely looked her way.
There was something in the atmosphere that made Thea uncomfortable. The air was strange. It had a hard, crackling quality that made it difficult for Thea to breathe. Apart from that, there was also a moisture that clung to her skin and penetrated her to the bone, making her feel heavy and melancholy.
The voice directed her through the city until she arrived at the golden cone building. Two thickset men stood at the entrance but they just watched her, allowing her to walk past them and into the building. Her mother directed her down a few flights of stairs and through a few corridors until she arrived at a set of beautifully engraved silver and scarlet double doors. As Thea stepped to them, they opened automatically.
Inside, the room opened out into a gorgeous, spacious lounge, richly furnished and decorated in various shades of red, cream, and black with gold fittings. On one of the sofas sat the woman Thea had come to recognize as her mother, but she looked nothing like how she looked in the dreams. She sat in a relaxed position on the sofa, her arms stretched out and resting on the back of it while her legs were crossed. She was still stunningly beautiful, with pale skin that almost glowed against the red in the room and deep brown hair piled on top of her head, bouncy tendrils swaying around her face. However, her expression was hard and the look in her blue-gray eyes felt dangerous. She was heavily made up, with smoky eyes and maroon lips that were a stark contrast to the natural beauty Thea had seen in her dreams. Wearing a low-cut, skintight top and tight leather trousers that showed an amazing figure, she didn't look particularly motherly, but Thea wasn't expecting much, she was a demon after all.
“Tsk. That doesn’t mean anything,” her mother said smiling. “Mothers can still dress like this.” Her face softened as she looked over Thea. "Welcome, Elithea." Thea instantly saw herself in her mother's looks. It was almost eerie.
"Release me," Thea said. "I cannot have a conversation with you if you are controlling me."
Her mother sighed and Thea felt her withdraw the strong clutch on her body and mind, yet she didn’t disappear completely. Thea still felt no emotions and she was frozen still, however she could suddenly breathe better, and could turn her head and move her face.
Thea studied her mother. She looked well, confident and self-assured. It seemed like Thea should be annoyed about this, but she couldn't remember why. "Why did you bring me here?" she asked.
Her mother raised an eyebrow. "Is that the first thing you have to say to me?"
Thea thought back, trying to remember all the things she wanted to ask her mother, but her memory was cloudy. She couldn't even remember where she had been before arriving here. When was the last time she saw Cam?
"Oh, this Cam guy yet again," her mother said, exasperated. "Why does he fill your thoughts so much?"
Thea thought hard for the answer, struggling through the treacle-like memories in her mind. "He’s my natural mate."
"So?" her mother said, as if it was the most stupid answer she could have given. "Just because he is your natural mate does not mean he deserves to be. He has to earn it. And from what I've seen in your mind, he hasn't earned anything." She lowered her arms to rest her hands in her lap. "You could do better."
"Maybe that kind of advice would have been useful if you had actually been a mother to me all these years," Thea stated simply.
Her mother scowled. "You have no idea what was going on. You have no idea what it took to make sure things happened the way I needed them to happen."
Thea shrugged. "So, tell me."
Her mother's expression deepened into an expression of pain. She lost the self-assuredness in her manner; her fingers fidgeted, her eyes lowered, she pulled her bottom lip between her teeth as she thought. When she looked up again, tears were in her eyes. "I never meant to not be there Thea. I never meant for you to grow up without me. I didn't think it through. I made so many mistakes."
Her hold on Thea slightly slipped, and a surge of anger swirled in Thea before disappearing again.
"Why did you leave me?" Thea demanded. "Why did you leave us? You wanted to give Dad a child, and you managed to do it—you fought all the odds to do it—and then you left! Why did you leave?"
Oriah took a breath. "Once I got pregnant, I thought everything would be fine. I would be able to give Mark at least one child and we would be complete, a complete family. But I didn't factor in the demons."
"What do you mean?"
"Demons are attracted to certain types of energy. Angelic energy doesn't interest them much unless it is blended or mixed with something else. In order to get pregnant with you, I took energy directly from the Stream. Pure, undiluted, energy from the Creator. That energy made sure that you were able to survive each time I entered the Realm, but it also made you a unique being; more angel than human but still a Nephilim. Your unique makeup attracted demons, particularly Legion demons. Everywhere we went, they followed us, hounded us, attacked us…" She shook her head, as if the memories were too much. "We moved so many times, but as the pregnancy progressed we couldn't keep moving. I had to think about Mark—he was human, and he was barely able to survive the attacks the Legion decided to throw our way. I couldn't protect him, and I wouldn’t have been able to protect you either once you were born. I no longer had my powers. I no longer had any connection to the Angel Realm. I had to do something."
"What did you do?" Thea asked, after a few long moments of silence.
"I traded myself," Oriah said, her voice low and impassive. Her eyes lowered. "The Legion demons didn't know whether it was me that had the unique energy, or you. I persuaded them it was me, and that they could take me and turn me into a demon provided that they left you and Mark alone. I made an agreement with them that you would be safe for twenty-two years. By then I knew you would be fully trained and able to fight them yourself."
Thea processed the information, hardly able to believe her mother would do something like that. "They believed you?"
"Why wouldn't they?" Oriah shrugged. "They had no idea why my energy felt different. I persuaded them it was because I had taken energy from the Stream and then Fallen. They didn’t know that the energy had been directed into you. Once I made the contract with them, they had to abide by it even after they realized that you were the one who was special, not me."
“How did you take energy from the Stream?”
Oriah pursed her lips. “I asked the Creator for it. And he gave it to me.”
Thea thought through what she was saying, trying to make sense of it. "Why didn't you tell Dad? Why did you leave him so damaged?"
Oriah leaned forward sharply. "What do you mean? How is he damaged?"
"He’s had mental problems since you left. His memory was severely damaged; he could hardly remember anything as I grew up, and even though I tried to get him healed recently, he still can't remember past your Fall. I know you did something to him. I just can't believe that you would inflict him with such pain that caused me an unsafe childhood with a parent who could barely remember anything. The human world has a lot of evil in it, you know? Not just demons."
Utter shock transformed Oriah's face. Her hand came to her mouth, and her expression twisted into an expression of horror. "No," she said, shaking her head. "No, he was fine. I only sealed some of the memories of me that would cause him the most pain, so he wouldn't have to suffer from my choices."
"Well, he did suffer," Thea said. "Just in a different way."
Oriah stood abruptly and paced the room, her expression a blend of pain, disbelief, and anger as she fell into her thoughts.
Thea watched her. She seemed to be truly upset. Thea suspected that she may not have known about Dad but with her feelings still muted, Thea was unable to feel anything for her.
After a long moment, Oriah slowed and looked up at Thea, her eyes soft. "I didn't realize that." Her voice was miserable and almost resigned. "I didn't realize I did that to him."
"How could you not? You were an Archangel! How could you not know what you were doing in someone’s mind?"
Oriah shook her head, and began pacing again but slower. "The process of turning into a demon is a gradual one. I amended all the memories of my charges before I Fell. I wasn’t ever intending to go into your Dad’s mind. I spent my transition time with you both, and then I amended his memories before I left. But I used demonic powers to do it. I was close to being a demon then and I didn't think that mattered because I could still use the techniques I used as an Archangel. I monitored him afterward and he seemed fine… " A tremble her voice stopped her from speaking for a short moment. "So," she said hesitantly. "Are you saying that your father was unable to tell you what you were?"
Thea nodded. "I didn't know what I was until I started seeing demons and Cam came to train me."
Her mother sat down on the couch, her elbows on her knees, and closed her eyes as she thought. “That makes sense, now.” She opened her eyes. “I learned that some Spectra demons had reported seeing a human girl flickering with Nephilim energy, and I sent a message to the Dominion League to watch over you. I thought they already knew about you, but my messenger returned saying he had been questioned harshly and almost captured.”
So that’s how the Dominion League knew about her. Then they gave the assignment to protect her to Cam.
Oriah shook her head slowly. "I didn't mean for you to grow up that way," she said. "I didn't mean for you to grow up not knowing what you were, not knowing who I was… I was trying to protect you." Oriah smiled at her, a real honest smile. "Regardless, I'm proud of you, Thea. I’m proud of who you are and what you’ve become."
Thea watched her, unsure of what to say. It made sense what she was saying, and Thea was inclined to believe it. She wanted to believe that Oriah had become a demon in order to keep Thea safe, that she hadn't chosen that life for any other reason, and yet… something still didn't feel right.