Two weeks later, I haven’t had any more unexpected visits from Dylan. I’m a bit conflicted about that. It was nice when he was trying to see me, but it also hurt me every time I looked into his brown eyes. I dream about him almost every night, his body blanketing mine, keeping me safe. I miss his smell. Dylan smells like cinnamon. It’s a strong yet comforting spice that makes me think of home, just like him. I huff and sit up in bed. I stretch my arms above my head and yawn.

Surprisingly, I’ve been sleeping really well. Maybe the dreams about Dylan help a little. I look over at my clock. It’s seven forty-five. I need to get out of my cozy bed and get ready for work. I’m enjoying my new job at Hankman and Associates. They have incredible benefits. They have lunch catered almost every day. A girl can used to that.

They’re trying to emulate Google in that aspect, make it a fun environment. None of us have cubicles; it’s one long table we share with all our computers set in the middle. I’m not holed up in an office anymore. The people I work with are great too. They’re all very friendly. I actually look forward to going to my job. I did with Dylan too, but I just couldn’t work for him again. I wouldn’t be able to face him day after day. I’d be fawning over him and he would be pushing me away.

Grudgingly, I roll out of bed and that’s when I notice the blood. Everything goes black for a moment. I feel my body hit the cold floor. I break out in a sweat and start to shake. When I’m finally able to see my surroundings, I reach for my cell on the table near my bed. Sitting on the floor, I dial the one number I hate but need.

“Hello?”

“Dylan? Can you come over please?” Tears run down my face. I wipe my nose with the back of my hand and sniffle.

“Andy? Are you okay? I’m on my way.” He wanted to stay on the line with me, but I told him I’d like to get changed before he arrived. I also need to call my doctor immediately and make an appointment. He reluctantly hangs up. As I’m pulling my shirt over my head, there’s a knock rattling my door. “Andy?”

I sigh in relief and open the door wide. Dylan engulfs me in a huge hug, then pulls away slightly and cradles my face in his hands. “Are you okay? Did you speak with the doctor?” I nod and he moves his hands from my face to my sides. I feel a little guilty I’m keeping him in suspense a little longer so I can feel all this comfort from him.

“I have an appointment in thirty minutes. She was able to get me in quickly. She said spotting is normal with pregnancy, but she wants to check me over just to make sure.” I lean my head on his shoulder. This is nice. I’m a lot calmer after talking to my doctor and with him here, I feel safe, reveling in his scent and warmth for a moment.

“Was it a lot of blood? Are you feeling okay?” Dylan’s still amped up. I need to settle his nerves.

“I feel fine. It wasn’t much blood.” His arm wraps around my shoulders and he leads me out of my apartment.

“All right, let’s get you to the doctor.”

We get into his car and an hour later we’re walking out of the exam room with smiles on our faces. It was just light spotting and nothing to worry about. The baby looked perfect. Dr. Flemming put our minds at ease. Dylan held my hand the entire time. It almost felt like we were a couple again. I tried to keep myself grounded. It wasn’t too hard since my heart is still aching. I can’t help but love him. My heart had no choice. It beats for him and this baby. It doesn’t help how attentive he was this morning.

I honestly don’t know what he wants from me anymore. Is he here only for the baby? Does he want a working relationship again? Does he want to be a couple again? I don’t even know if that’s on the table for me. This is all a big mess. Time away from him didn’t help me come to a decision on any of this.

“Do you want to grab a late breakfast?” Dylan asks me as we are walking to his car. He opens the door for me and I slide in. I contemplate his question as he rounds the car. If time away from him didn’t help, maybe time with him will help me figure out what I want out of all of this. When he buckles in his seat belt I answer him.

“Yes. That sounds nice.” He smiles brilliantly at me and starts the car. That smile could melt panties off women everywhere.

We arrive at IHOP and are seated immediately. “I’m surprised you agreed to eat with me.” Dylan puts cream and sugar in his coffee. I grab my hot chocolate and take a sip.

“I was hungry and you were willing to pay,” I tease, taking a sip of my orange juice. No coffee for me these days. It’s a small price to pay to have a healthy, happy baby. Dylan sits there and watches me for a moment. I don’t know what he’s up to, but he’s smirking.

“You look beautiful, Andy.” I look down at my flowy floral top that’s the exact opposite of his black concert band T-shirt. I don’t know what to make of that comment. I feel bloated and uncomfortable.

“Thank you.” He takes a drink from his coffee and then plays with the cup by turning it on the table. He’s stalling or trying to gather his words, I guess. He gives up on messing with his mug and steeples his hands in front of his mouth. It reminds me of Sherlock Holmes and I sigh. He’s so hot, even when he’s flustered and out of his element. He gives me a bewildered look and then shakes it off.

“You must know, I miss you like hell. It’s been unbearable without you. I don’t miss you as a secretary or a warm body in my bed or an easy lay as you put it awhile back. I miss my Andy. The smell of your skin in the morning and when you walk around in only my shirt. I even miss your pink shit everywhere. You shocked me with the way you told me you were pregnant.”

I open my mouth to say something but he holds up his hand.

“Please, just let me finish.” I nod and he continues. “I didn’t react well. Honestly, I’m still in shock about it, but I want this. I want you and the baby. I want you to move in with me and let me take care of you. I’m a fucking idiot, I need a little bit of a learning curve on all this shit, Andy.” He reaches out for my hand and I instinctively let him have it. He raises my hand to his mouth and kisses it. I’ve just turned to mush. This bearded tattooed Prince of Darkness is asking for pink in his house . . . and me. I begin to cry.

Dylan immediately abandons his seat across from me in the booth and joins my side to comfort me. I nestle into his neck and smell him in. He still smells like cinnamon and something else . . . something entirely him. “I love you.” Oh shit. I just laid that on him. What the hell is wrong with me? Pregnancy. I’m blaming it on pregnancy hormones.

“What?” Dylan pulls away from me and looks me straight in the eye, waiting for confirmation of what I just blurted out.

“Umm, nothing. I’ve been craving pancakes all morning. I love pancakes.” I peek up at him to see if he buys the lie. He scratches his jaw and looks down at me, bewildered.

“Huh. Well, the pancakes will be here shortly.” He laughs. I blow out some air and rest my head on his shoulder. Thank God he bought that. I don’t know what I’d do if we addressed my love for him. He’d probably bolt on me. I hate to admit it, but I really do love him on my side with this baby. I need some support in this. It was a surprise to me too and it feels good to have someone like Dylan to share this with.