Opening my eyes I look around but all I can see is darkness, I was hoping it was all a nightmare but after being locked up for days I should be used to it by now. I struggle to lift my hand in front of my eyes but in this pitch blackness I can’t see it. I feel my eyes fill with tears, but after crying for what seems like days I resist the temptation. I feel something crawl over my foot and instinct makes me want to jump up and scream or swat at whatever it is however all I manage is a slight movement of my leg which brings a painful scream to my lips.
I can feel my heart start to race, I know that if I don’t try to calm my breathing I’m going to start hyperventilating and there is no one to help me. I have had a few of these episodes since being locked up, I get into such a state that I finally pass out. Maybe it isn’t such a bad thing to be unconscious and let the time pass without being aware of all the things that had happened to me in such a short time.
I close my eyes and try to focus on something positive that will take my pain away, I am no longer sure as to when it’s night or when it’s day in here. Someone will come in and give me water and a piece of dried bread. When I first arrived even though I had been abused and was in great pain I could still manage to take in water and bread by myself but since that day… I’m not going to think about that day. I try to roll over so the pain in my back will lessen but my strength has left me. I’m sure my ribs are broken going by the excruciating pain every time I breathe or try to move. My ankle is either broken or badly sprained. I had cuts down various parts of my body that have stopped bleeding by now but are still paining and possibly infected. To top it all I have a constant headache since the beating and my face I can feel is swollen.
“I will see you soon granny.” I whisper.
Why? Why would they kill such a good woman? We had always minded our business, my gran was the kindest woman I knew. We always kept away from people, mostly because of me but that fateful day those beasts came to our home broke the few items we had in our possession and took her from me. I can still see her unseeing eyes staring up at nothing, those beautiful eyes of hers that had so much life before, so much love. I feel my heart contract in anguish, as I picture my gran the only person that ever cared for me.
When I turned sixteen and everyone wanted to have me committed she was the only one that stood by me. We moved away from town and lived on a small plot of land that was practically self-sustainable to love working the land alongside her. If we needed supplies from town she used to go in and get it, I hardly ever went into town. The locals there used to silently judge me with their stares, even though they didn’t come out and say how mad they found me I could hear them. As time passed by I was becoming a recluse, not only to save myself the heartache of having everyone judge me insane but also from the painful side by being surrounded by people.
That fateful day when those men came whilst gran tried to get me to hide but it was too late, I can still hear her screams in my head. I knew they were up to no good as soon as they got out of the car. I tried to fight, to save her, but they were too strong. They hit me, knocked me down, and kicked me until I lost consciousness. When eventually I woke I was in a car heading to the hell that I am living in now. On arrival they had a bucket in the corner that could use as a toilet not that they ever cleaned it out, I used to navigate my way there in darkness but for a while now I can’t move so I’m dirty, smelly, itchy and I can feel whatever is sharing this cell is eating away at my skin. The smell I have adapted too, it also helps so no one is tempted to stay in here with me for longer than they actually have to. Realising the water and bread will also come to an end and not sure as to why they still keeping me alive I wish they would just allow me die. If I have to guess I would say I have been here for maybe two weeks, but in this darkness I could be wrong.
When I first arrived I heard noise from somewhere outside this cell but one day it just stopped, am not sure if they took away whomever was down here with me or if the person died. On the way here I heard one of the men talking on the phone, telling someone that the parcel was secure. I’m sure he was talking about me, but why would they want me? That is what I have been asking myself since I got here.
Gran always said I was special and that if anyone found out they may want to take me away from her, I always thought she was just trying to be kind but could it be true? Do these men know about me? Everyone in town just thought I was insane, no one actually knew what was wrong with me, so how would they have found out? I know for a fact they had been looking for me because as soon as they saw me one of them called out my name. They killed my Gran to abduct me, if she had been like my parents and had let me go when taken ill she would still be alive.
I hear a noise, my breathing picks up intensifying the pain in my chest and back. I can feel my heart beat erratically. I see a sliver of light coming in from the bottom of the cell door, soon there will be a click before someone opens my door. I hear heavy footsteps drawing closer, there is a jiggle and I hear a key turn in the lock. And then the door opens, the light from the corridor outside blinds me not allowing me to see who is standing in the doorway.
“Damn it smells like someone died in here.” A deep male voice grumbles. I can hear his footsteps drawing closer until he’s standing over me. I open my eyes a little feeling them burn from the light that is filtering in through the door. All I can see is an unfocused shape of a huge man, I can’t make out his features. I feel myself start to tremble, I try and take a deep breath to calm myself but the pain in my chest won’t allow it.
“I have water here for you, we don’t want you to die just yet. Do we?” there is a sneer in his voice as I feel him lower himself down to his haunches. As soon as I feel his hand touching me under my neck I start to hyperventilate. “Not now bitch, you need to drink this.”
The water starts to gush down my throat, I cough trying to breathe and swallow at the same time. I feel the water running down my chin and neck. His hand is now squeezing the back of my neck, I hear myself whimper in pain the little light that’s in the room fading as I start to lose consciousness.
The next time I awaken I know I am again by myself, my throat is raw and painful. It always feels like that after I awake and they have given me water. I know they tighten their hands around my neck holding my head up and helping me to drink while I’m unconscious but the pain when I awaken is agonising. I feel the piece of bread in my hand but from experience I know I’m not going to be able to swallow as my throat is too raw for that. Unsure on how long I was unconscious for but there is no noise so he must have left a while ago. The smell of him still lingers on my skin, if there was anything in my stomach I’m sure I would gag.
He always has a scent of sweet Tabaco and coriander, if I ever leave here I will never be able to eat anything with coriander again. It brings back memories of my beautiful vegetable and herb garden that I kept at home, who will take care of it now that I’m gone it will die just like gran.
Suddenly the ground shakes under me as if a bomb went off, I feel particles of sand fall on my face and body. I wonder what happened, hopefully they all blew themselves up to leave me alone to die in peace.
After what seemed like eternity I hear a loud noise as if scrapping and then a banging noise. “It’s as dark as fuck down here bring me a light.” I hear a deep growly voice that for some reason calms me. There is more footsteps and then I see the sliver of light under the door, they must have found the light switch. Who could this be? It didn’t sound as if they knew about this place, maybe it was the police.
“Fuck, Bjarni come down here there are three cells with key pads down here I might need your help in opening these doors.” I hear that voice again, why does that voice bring me such comfort? I close my eyes feeling at peace for the first time since I was taken.
“Damn brother whatever is down here must be dead going by the smell of this place.” This voice is different must be from the Bjarni guy that the first one called. I hear banging on a door, “Is there someone in here?” the guy asks. They must have started at one of the cells by the stairs, even though I open my mouth to shout out no sound comes out. I try again but there is no sound only pain.
“Stop!” I hear another male voice this one sounds like its coming from upstairs. “Celmund just contacted us, apparently Jas and Gabriela just saw explosives attached to a door down here.” Oh no, that must be the clicking sound I hear when they come down here before they open my door. They must be deactivating the bombs somehow, I wish I could warn them but no matter how hard I try no sound comes out.
“Motherfuckers” the guy with the calming voice calls out. It’s strange how even upset this guy’s voice can bring me peace.
“Brandr, they say she is down here.” Who are they talking about? Is there someone else down here? I hear receding footsteps, oh please, please don’t leave me here. Are they leaving now that they know there are explosives? I don’t blame them, why would they put their lives in danger for me, someone they don’t even know or if anyone down here is alive.
I thought I didn’t have any tears left but I was wrong, the tears are silently cascading down my cheeks. Maybe this is the end, these men are not the same ones that took me that means that the others are either killed or they left. If these guys also leave no one will know I am down here.