Chapter Nine
Silvery blue moonlight streamed in through Rose’s bedroom window, setting her sleeping form in an angelic glow. He should’ve gotten up hours ago and made this easier on the both of them.
But he couldn’t.
The past two days had been the best he’d had in years and it wasn’t because he’d finally gone on vacation. Spending time with Rose again gave him something he hadn’t felt in a long time—peace and contentment. The restlessness of the past few months, not knowing the direction his life was headed… It had all but disappeared and it wasn’t hard to figure out why.
Maybe it was selfish of him to stay and soak up as much of the feel-good as he could, but he couldn’t bring himself to walk away from her. Not yet, anyway. Being with Rose felt too right. Too good. Too much like everything the last nine years hadn’t.
Smoothing her hair away, he pressed a gentle kiss to her bare shoulder and slid out of bed. Was he leaving leaving? Probably not. But he did need some space to think.
His boxer briefs seemed to be MIA, so he snagged his jeans off the hallway floor and pulled them on without buttoning. The curtains in the main part of the condo were open, giving view to the full moon and the not-so-distant downtown area of Sweetgrass. He paused to take in the stunning view, appreciating, not for the first time, how inviting the little town was. In many ways, Sweetgrass reminded him of River Bend. A place where people put down roots and took pride in living simple, albeit rich, lives.
River Bend didn’t feel like that same homey place anymore. He’d lived there most of his life—save his toddler years when his parents had lived in Sacramento by Janine and her family—and like so many of his friends, he thought he’d be there forever. He had good friends, an incredible family, and a job most guys would give their right leg for.
But at some point, the discontentment had seeped in. He couldn’t put a finger on why or even when, but if he had to guess, he’d say it was probably the result of seeing so many of his buddies settle down. First Josh, then Tony and Mark. Like wooden soldiers, they fell, one right after the other. Not that any of them would complain about it, the sappy suckers.
Whisper soft hands slipped around his waist, lying flat against his abs, while a warm, wet kiss found a home in the middle of his back. “You okay?” Rose asked quietly, her voice slightly hoarse from sleep.
“Yeah.” He cleared his throat and shot a gentle glance back at her. Her dark hair fell in a mess of curls around her face and, to his delight—maybe his demise, too—she had on his t-shirt. “Just deciding whether or not I should go or stay. Not gonna lie—seeing you wearing my clothes kinda has me thinking the latter.”
She smiled and rested her cheek against his shoulder blade. “It smells like you. I couldn’t resist.”
Yeah, well, he knew plenty about futile resistance.
“You know I’m leaving in a few days. We can’t do this again.”
“We can’t do it after you leave, no. But there’s nothing saying we can’t while you’re here.”
As wonderful as that sounded, seeing her again was a disaster in the making. “That won’t make saying goodbye any easier.”
Her response was another sweet kiss that made him shiver. “I know. But I’m not ready for this to end, and let’s be honest—it’s going to hurt either way. Now or then.”
He nodded, knowing she was right, though it didn’t mean that the answer was to say screw the consequences and give in to a few more days together. In an ideal world, he wouldn’t have to hurt her at all.
“Come back to bed.” Her hands coasted up his chest and then down again, one slipping effortlessly into his open fly. “I don’t want to think about anything but this right now.”
When she touched him like that, neither did he.
“We’re asking for trouble, Rosie,” he warned, his traitorous cock coming to life like a puppet on a string. “The more often we do this, the harder it’ll be to walk away.”
“But if we ignore what we both so obviously want…” She toed up and teased the tip of her tongue along the side of his neck. “We may regret it for the rest of our lives. Not a risk I’m willing to take. You?”
Jesus fuck, this woman. “When you put it like that…”
Her warm, soft fingers wrapped around his dick, reminding him how good it would feel to bury himself inside her again.
Maybe just one more time.
“I like where this is going,” she whispered, squeezing his hardening shaft. Not to the point of pain, but not gently either. Just the way he liked it. Something only she would know. “I like that I can still turn you on.”
Yeah, that was never going to be a problem.
He turned to her and tried to decide what he wanted more—her right here, right now…or her on his face in the bedroom.
“Am I still in charge?” Rose angled her head toward the couch, her long hair falling off her shoulder in a silken wave he wanted to wind his hands in while he kissed her knees out from under her.
“You’re always in charge, princess.” Or so he’d let her think.
A wicked haze fell over her dark eyes and she pushed him back until his knees hit the cushions and he lost his footing. Desperation and desire clouding her eyes, she yanked down his jeans before his ass hit the seat. They stayed balled at his ankles as she climbed onto his lap and…
“Holy shit.”
No panties on her part and going commando himself made for an all-too-easy grand entrance. She didn’t seem to mind.
“You have another condom, handsome?” Her breath hitched in his ear as she rocked her hips against his, taking him further and further inside and making it impossible to think.
“Uh, yeah.”
“Mmm,” she moaned when he bottomed out. “Then you’d better get it.”
***
How many times had she dreamed of this? Waking up to find Ryan in her bed again?
Rose smiled to herself, watching him sleep beside her, face to face, with his hand curled possessively around her hip.
A lock of dark hair fell haphazardly across his forehead and all the normal tension had faded from his face, making him seem so much younger than his twenty-seven years. He looked a lot like the young man she’d fallen in love with so long ago. Her heart recognized him just as easily as her body had remembered him last night.
Last night. God.
A reminiscent flutter stirred in her belly and she squeezed her thighs together, the familiar ache between them promising that this was definitely no dream.
She’d given herself to him. He’d given himself to her, too. They’d shared something sweet and passionate and real. Something she hadn’t been able to find with anyone else since him all those years ago, though she’d tried.
His mouth twitched as he dreamed, a ghost of a smile playing on his lips. Was he thinking about her? Had last night hit a nerve with him, too?
Unable to resist, she reached up and touched the dark stubble on his jaw, letting the short, prickling hairs slide beneath her fingertips as she made her way to his chin and the mouth she desperately wanted to taste again. Savor. Never, ever forget.
“You looking for a morning kiss, beautiful?” His eyes drifted open when her fingers found his lips. She smiled, loving how one glance into those dark blue pools could somehow soothe whatever unease or uncertainty warred inside of her.
“I wouldn’t turn you away…” She winked playfully. “But I was actually thinking about how nice this is. Just being with you.”
“It’s because I’m a rockstar cuddler, isn’t it?” Pulling her close, with both of his arms wrapped around her middle, he buried his face in the crook of her neck. His heated breath fanned against her skin and she shivered as goose bumps raced down her body.
“Definitely a pro when it comes to snuggling, though I’m pretty sure you learned everything you know from me.” She pinched his side and he flinched. A second later, he attacked, rolling her over and pinning her hands above her head. One look at his wide grin and she gasped. “Ryan, don’t you dare!”
“What’s wrong, Rosie? Scared?” He transferred her wrists to one big hand and skated the other over her shoulder, past her bare breasts, and straight to the sensitive curve between her ribs and her hip. The dance of his fingertips over her skin alone made her squirm. Anything more and she’d be a goner. “Ah…” He chuckled as he loomed above her, his position giving him more control than she cared for at the moment. “Still ticklish, huh?”
“Who, me? Nope. Not at all.” She shook her head, every muscle in her body on edge, waiting for the inevitable.
“No? Why are you as stiff as a board then?” One, two, three fingers walked up the side of her stomach.
“Because you’re heavy. It’s easier to breathe like this.” Or not breathe at all. Whatever.
One corner of that devious mouth curled into another panty-melting grin. “You are a horrible liar, princess. You know what I think about liars?”
“Uh huh. I do.” And it wasn’t going to be pretty. “Ryan!” She slammed her eyes shut and screamed when he let go of her wrists, anticipating the worst.
Only, what she felt were his big hands cupping her face. And his mouth brushing over hers in a slow, sweet glide that lit her on fire, from head to toe.
He shifted his weight, pressing his hips down on hers, in a way that stirred something deep inside of her. Sure, there was desire laced in there as well. With Ryan, there was always desire. But this was different. This was more.
She shoved her hands into his hair, giving back just as good as he gave, pouring everything she had into loving him with nothing more than her mouth.
“I love this, too,” she whispered between kisses. “The way we fit together.”
“Like a puzzle,” he murmured, his kiss still lingering against her lips. “Tell me it’s not like this with anyone else, baby. Tell me it’s just me.”
A bone-deep ache began to burn in her chest and she held her breath, trying to ward off the consuming sensation. Of course it didn’t work—wouldn’t—because she’d never been successful in keeping this man out of her heart.
Slowly, she opened her eyes and let go of the self-protective urge to shield herself. What was the point? If he felt even half of what she was feeling right now, he already knew the power he had over her anyway.
“You’re the only one who’s ever made me feel this way.” She cupped his face, not caring that her hands shook and that tears had begun to swell in her eyes.
How was it possible to feel so close to him, so soon? To feel like they’d always been together, despite all the years and miles between them.
A heavy, knowing warmth fell over his gaze as he lowered his forehead to hers. “How do I make you feel, princess?”
“Like we were made for each other.”