“HEY!” MICHELLE SPUN around in the kitchen as she heard us come through the door.
“I hope it’s okay that I didn’t knock. It was open.” I pointed back toward the front of the house.
“No problem at all.” She waved a dish towel toward me and then flipped it over her shoulder. “How did it go? How was storytime?”
Matthew tucked his hands under his armpits and flapped his wings as he walked around the kitchen. “It was awesome. Viper danced like a duck!”
“Viper danced?” She turned her head toward me slowly, a playful gleam in her eyes.
“Viper did.” I nodded proudly. “I figured if he was willing to do it, why the heck shouldn’t I?”
She laughed. “I’m impressed. What else happened?”
Matthew stood up from his duck position and put his hands on his hips. “There were big boys in the arcade who were mean.”
She pulled her brows in tight, looking from Matthew to me. “What’s he talking about?”
“That big boy took the game I was playing,” Matthew continued, “but Viper pulled him out of the seat and told him to give me money.”
Michelle’s eyes were full of panic as they flashed from Matthew’s over to mine. “What is he talking about?”
I held my hands out in front of me. “Wait, I promise it’s not as bad as it sounds. Let me explain.”
She cocked her hip to the side and crossed her arms, staring me square in the face. Quite intimidating, actually.
“So we went to storytime and danced like ducks, then I took him to Cowboy Phil’s, that place I told you about?” I paused so she could add something, an mmhmm, a yep, a nod of the head, anything to let me know she didn’t want to rip my face off right then.
Crickets.
“Anyway, we ordered our food, and while we were waiting for it to get there, we went to the arcade to donate some quarters to the place. I was playing pinball and he was playing a driving game. Before I knew it, some punk-ass teenagers took his game, so… I very politely asked them to get up and give Matthew his game back. At first, the kid wasn’t exactly willing, but once he stood up and turned around, he changed his tune very quickly.”
Chewing on her bottom lip, she narrowed her eyes and shifted them over to Matthew and back to me again. “What was he talking about when he said they paid him?”
“Oh. That.” I shrugged. “Well, as he was rushing out of the room, I reminded them that they owed the young man money.”
Matthew reached into his pocket and pulled the money out, proudly showing it off to his mom. “I got five bucks, Mom!”
“The game was five dollars? What kind of an arcade was this?” she asked.
“Well, no. The game was one dollar, but all he had was a five, so we’ll just consider the other four punitive damages.” I grinned at her.
“And Mom, Viper only said ‘tit’ one time, so don’t be mad,” Matthew added.
Michelle glared at me and inhaled deeply as her nostrils flared like an angry bull’s.
“I swear it made sense during my bully beatdown,” I defended.
She slapped her hand over her eyes and shook her head just as I reached over and high-fived Matthew and Maura started making noise through the monitor.
Michelle looked up at Matthew and winked. “Someone must have sensed her big brother was home and now she wants to get up to play.” She kissed the top of Matthew’s head and started out of the kitchen. “Be right back.”
I wandered into the family room and sat down on the couch. Before I could call him over, Matthew was already sitting next to me, leaning into my side. I draped my arm over him and squeezed harder.
We sat through almost an entire episode of that annoying talking sponge again, and I pulled out my phone to look at the time. I glanced down at Matthew, who was half asleep on my arm, his eyes completely glazed over. I carefully lifted his head and slid out from under him, laying him gently on a pillow. I headed toward the front of the house but felt guilty leaving without saying good-bye, so I took a deep breath and quietly climbed up the stairs.
I’d only been upstairs in Mike’s house a handful of times. Whenever I’d been there, we’d mostly hung out in the family room or down in the man cave in the basement, so I had no idea where I was going. Once I got to the top, I heard singing and followed it to the left. The first door I came to was about halfway closed, but the singing was definitely coming from there, so I stopped to listen, leaning in close.
It was Michelle.
She was singing “Hush Little Baby,” I assumed to Maura, in the most beautiful voice I’d ever heard in my life. I stood there with my eyes closed, listening to the calming sound that was coming out of her. When she got to the last verse, I decided to sneak back downstairs and just wait to say bye, but when I went to take a step, the wood floor creaked under my feet. I cringed and a second later, the bedroom door opened.
“Hey.” She smiled at me as she carried Maura on her hip.
“I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to interrupt you. Matthew fell asleep downstairs, and I didn’t want to sneak out without saying good-bye, so I thought I’d come find you, but then I heard you singing, and I didn’t want to bug you…” I rambled incoherently.
“Viper!” she interrupted. “It’s okay. I was just about done anyway. Lately, it’s been hard for me to find time alone with her. Matthew gets my undivided attention when she’s napping, and the couple times you’ve gone to the library, she’s been napping, so I just wanted to steal a few minutes with her. Sorry it took so long.” She reached out and wiped drool off Maura’s chin.
“No way, please don’t apologize. It was nice. I didn’t know you could sing like that.”
“Oh, thanks.” Her cheeks flushed and she bit her lip, trying to hide her smile. “I can’t cook to save my life, so thank goodness there’s one good thing she’ll remember from her childhood, right?”
After a brief, awkward shift right there in that hallway, I cleared my throat. “Anyway, he’s out and I’m sure you have things to do this evening, so I’m gonna take off.”
“Do you have plans tonight?” she asked as she followed me down the stairs.
I shook my head. “No.”
“Then you can’t go.”
Once we got to the bottom of the steps, I turned back to face her. “Huh?”
“You bought my son lunch and saved him from the arcade antagonizers. Throwing a piece of pizza on a paper plate for you is the least I can do.”
“You don’t have to buy me dinner.” I laughed.
“Fine.” She turned and started toward the kitchen. “In that case, stay right there while I get you money for today.”
“You’re not paying me,” I called to her sternly.
She stopped in the kitchen doorway and spun back around, balancing Maura on her hip as she raised a defiant eyebrow at me. “Fine again. Sausage or pepperoni?”
Since Matthew and I had just eaten lunch an hour before, once he woke up from his short catnap, we passed the time until dinner building Legos together.
“Sit down with me.” He tugged on my shirt as I walked through the family room.
“Hey, look!” I pointed down at him. “You’re sitting criss cross applesauce. I will too.”
I heard Michelle chuckle from the kitchen as she loaded the dishwasher.
A huge bin of Legos, a million different shapes and sizes, sat next to Matthew. “What are we building?” I asked him.
“A fire station.” He was looking down at his project. The harder he concentrated, the bigger his frown grew.
“Do you want me to help?” I wasn’t sure what to do. Lego creations were sacred to some kids.
He sat up excitedly. “Can you make a fire truck to go in my fire house?”
I nodded. “Consider it done.”
We sat in silence, working diligently on our respective projects for what felt like hours without saying a word, just concentrating. After a while, I heard Michelle chuckling, so I looked up. She was standing behind the couch with her arms folded, smiling at us with her head tilted to the side.
I glanced down at Matthew and back up at her, lost as to what she’d laughed at. “What?”
“Have you ever seen the movie Forrest Gump?” she asked.
Random.
“Yeah, a long time ago.”
“There’s that scene at the very end of the movie where big Forrest goes in to watch TV with little Forrest and Jenny is watching them from behind. She smiles to herself because they look the same and sit the exact same way. You two just reminded me of that.”
I hadn’t even noticed that Matthew and I were sitting the exact same way with our legs out to the side and our pile of Legos in the middle between us.
“Wasn’t Jenny cooking those hard-working men dinner during that scene?” I teased, grinning up at her as I connected two tiny red Legos.
“I told you I don’t cook. I can make spaghetti and French toast. That’s about it.”
I raised an eyebrow at her. “Scrambled eggs?”
She shook her head. “Nope.”
“Meatloaf?”
“Nope.”
“Chili?”
“Nope.”
“Burgers?”
“I don’t even know how to use the grill.” She laughed. “Why do you think I ordered pizza?”
Matthew, without looking up from his Legos, exclaimed, “I love pizza!”
“Thank God for that, buddy.” I reached over and messed up his hair.
“Oh, whatever. You’re telling me you can cook?” Michelle walked around to the front of the couch and sat down, pulling her legs up under her.
“Actually, yes,” I said matter-of-factly as I set the Legos down and turned toward her. “I really like cooking, but I never do it because it’s just me. Not worth the mess.”
She pulled her bottom lip in and nodded. “Impressive. What can you make?”
“Just about anything.” I shrugged. “My grandma taught me.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. She was a cook for years. She didn’t go to school for it or anything, but she was better than most who did.” I stared down at the ground, smiling as I talked about Gam. “She worked at a seminary in the kitchen, so she would cook for the aspiring priests. Huge dinner parties every night. And she would bring home any leftovers for us. Pot roast, rosemary chicken, the most amazing mashed potatoes you ever had in your life. Real stick-to-your-ribs comfort food. She’s amazing.”
My mouth started to water thinking of all the food Gam used to have just sitting in her fridge.
“Anyway.” I shrugged. “I used to ask her how she made this dish and that dish and I paid attention. Even now when I try to make something new, I split it in half and take it over to her for her approval, holding my damn breath as she puts that first bite in her mouth.”
Realizing I was rambling on for too long about Gam, I looked up at Michelle, who had a tear running down her cheek.
I panicked. “What did I say? I’m sorry.”
“No, no.” She wiped the tear away. “It’s nothing you said… I’m just jealous. I never really had a family. I was adopted, the only child my parents ever had, and they divorced when I was young. We visited my grandparents once a year, if that, and eventually they died. My mom passed when I was in high school, and my dad remarried and moved out to the West Coast. We talk, but not often. So really, it’s just me.”
“I’m so sorry.” I felt terrible. Just when I thought that the guilt had run its course and I was better, something happened to bring it right back to the surface. Mike was her only person, and I took him away.
“It’s okay.” She smiled the most unconvincing smile I’d ever seen. “I’m used to it. It’s always kinda just been me and Mike. I don’t know if you know, but Taylor moved here shortly after he died to help me and see the kids more often. She does try, but about a week after she got settled in, she discovered that the young musician in the apartment next to hers was the love of her life, so she’s been… preoccupied.”
“You should go with me to meet Gam sometime,” I blurted out. The words were just out of my mouth and I instantly regretted them.
She flinched slightly and narrowed her eyes at me. “Why would I do that?”
“I don’t know. Just someone to go visit. She only really has me, but I’m a horrible grandson and don’t get over there as often as I should.”
“Oh, have your parents passed too?”
All it took was one sentence for every muscle in my body to tense up.
“No, they’re alive,” I said sharply.
“You don’t see them?”
“No.”
“You don’t have to, but do you wanna tell me why?”
Fuck no.
I took a deep breath and looked up at her. I’d never noticed how blue her eyes were until that exact moment when they stared back at me, waiting for an answer to her question.
“Um…” I hesitated. “My parents aren’t great people. They suck, actually. So once I was old enough to decide who I did and didn’t want in my life, they didn’t make the cut.”
“Hmmm.” She looked down at her lap and pinched at the fabric of her pants. “So you’re kinda like me… alone?”
“Yep.” I nodded. “I prefer it that way, though. The closer people are to you, the more opportunities they have to hurt you.”
Just as she opened her mouth to say something, the doorbell rang.
“Pizza’s here!” Matthew sprang to life and jumped to his feet, hopping up and down excitedly.
“To be continued.” She winked at me as she got off the couch and headed up front.
Or not.