Chase

 

Stefan wanted to take me to the sex club again. I hadn’t been there in ages, and everything was new to me but the familiarity set in when I heard the beats playing on the stereo and they were loud.

I loved the music in here.

You could lose yourself in it.

But eventually something always stole you away. This time it was our friend Jonah. I could see him loosening his tie, downing his fourth martini, and getting a lap dance from a woman dressed in nothing but a leather harness. “Chase!” Jonah yelled to be heard over the music. “Are you here to have fun or sit around?”

“Sit around,” I yelled back.

“Pussy!” he said and laughed.

As though some stupid line like that could make me do what he wanted me to do. But I suppose Jonah was right to be annoyed. This wasn’t some ordinary strip club, it was a sex club. People didn’t come here to have drinks and watch others get lap dances; they came here to do what their desires drove them to do.

My other friend Connor, who had just come back from one of the rooms, turned to me. “Did you know Sydney started working here again?”

“I did not.”

“I just saw her when I was going to my room,” Connor said. “She was asking about you.”

I didn’t know what to say to that. “Thanks for letting me know.”

“Chase?” I heard a female voice and knew instantly who it belonged to.

“Sydney,” I said, turning toward her. She looked gorgeous in a skimpy corset that clung to her body. Her blonde wig accentuated her features, not that her actual brunette hair did not. “Hi.”

“Long time,” she said.

“Yes,” I smiled awkwardly.

After a bit of a pause, Sydney leaned in closer. “Can I talk to you?”

I looked at her face, loaded with makeup and the reddest lipstick that ever existed adorned her lips. I smiled again, a little less awkwardly this time. “Sure,” I said and got up to go with her.

She led me outside the dance area, until we could only hear muffled beats. She took me to the upstairs floor. We were standing in an area where there were rooms all in a line. We stood in the hallway and talked in hushed voices because we didn’t want to disturb the people inside. Sydney looked a little rattled. I noticed that from the beginning but I wanted her to tell me whatever was bothering her.

“I missed you,” she said.

“Sydney—”

“It’s okay, you don’t have to say it back.”

“Why did you bring me here?”

“The thing you hired me for,” Sydney said. “I wanted to thank you for that. I was really in need of money back then. Your check was a big help.”

“You can always come to me for money.”

“I prefer earning my cash.”

“I know.”

“I just wanted to know if it worked.”

I was facing some new emotions, things that I hadn’t wanted to think about were finally standing right in front of me. Decisions I’d made, that I should have regretted but I didn’t. Still, it was a little unnerving to think about what might have happened if I hadn’t taken those steps.

“It worked.”

“Good. So, you’re with someone?”

“It’s complicated.”

She smiled. “Isn’t it always?”

“I guess.”

“Are you here for someone?”

“I’m just here for the drinks,” I said.

“No one comes here for the drinks, Chase.”

“I just wanted to hang out with some friends,’ I explained. “They wanted me here as punishment, I think. Just to play with me. Kind of an inside joke.”

“If you’re here, maybe you’d like to go to the rooms…”

“No… no thanks.”

“Suit yourself,” she said, and kissed me on the cheek. “It was nice running into you.”

“Same here.”

When she left, I was finally able to go back to the guys. “That Sydney must be a lot of fun in bed,” Connor said the moment I claimed a seat on our booth. “Maybe I could hire her next.”

“She’s not going to come to you,” Jonah said. “Everyone knows Sydney has the hots for Cooper!”

“Jonah, please…” I tried to get him to stop but he wouldn’t stop teasing me.

“Oh, come on,” he said. “Admit it! You make them fall in love with you and then you break their hearts. That’s your M.O. isn’t it?”

His words made me outraged and I wanted nothing more than to shut him up, but then I realized I couldn’t shut up every person who thought that way. My reputation was what it was, I couldn’t change it. It was too late. If they thought I was some man-whore with zero attachments then I should just let them think that way.

No one cared about the truth.

I watched Sydney walking past our table to go to the men on another booth. They smiled at each other and then Sydney sat with them, started drinking with all three. I should have felt something at this, but I felt nothing for her anymore. And that was a good thing, I told myself.

It was a very good thing.

Because what I really wanted, was to have Blayne here with me. That was the only thing that made sense anymore. But she didn’t even know I had all these feelings about her. She didn’t want anything to do with me.

I needed to show her somehow, that I wanted her not because of some temporary attraction but because I knew who she was, and I knew she was perfect for me. But I had to stop thinking that way because she would not care for me much when she found out who I was, that I frequented sex clubs. It was a secret I hadn’t even confided about in most friends, let alone a girlfriend. Even if we did end up going out at some point, there was no way I could tell her about all this. She would end up hating me and that was the last thing I wanted.