March...

Gavin: Do you know why I got an invitation to Mara’s baby shower?

Michael: Because I sent it to you. She doesn’t have any family or female friends. It’ll be a bunch of guys.

Gavin: That’s unique, but if you’ll be there, so will I. You’ll just have to tell me what I’m supposed to do. I’ve never been to a baby shower.

Michael: I’ve never thrown one. We’ll figure it out together.

* * *

“Happy birthday,” Gavin said at the top of his voice the instant Michael answered his door. “A day early,” he added as he used the large bags he carried to push his way inside.

“Thank you. What’s all this?”

Gavin could hear the happiness in Michael’s voice. He wanted more. “It’s a one-man surprise birthday party,” Gavin said, dumping everything on Michael’s kitchen table. “I have presents, dinner, and some other stuff. I also brought my luggage for my trip tomorrow so I can stay with you every second until it’s time for my flight. It’s still in the car. I’ll bring it in later.”

Michael’s arms encircled his waist from behind. He pressed his lips to the spot between Gavin’s shoulder blades. Gavin’s eyes fell closed. He breathed in the moment. Every time Michael kissed him, it was like the man was choosing him all over again. The sensation never got old.

“You’re amazing,” Michael said against his back.

The tightness in Gavin’s chest increased. “Only because you are,” Gavin argued. “Now,” he said, tugging Michael closer to the table. “Open your presents.”

“Oooh, what’d I get?”

Gavin handed him a bright blue bag. It was heavy and huge. He was ridiculously excited to see Michael’s reaction. “Jesus, it’s heavy.” Michael peered inside as he made the claim. His face lit and the pressure sitting on Gavin’s chest increased. After setting the bag on the floor, Michael pulled the first framed watercolor from the bag. Gavin obsessed over the man’s every reaction. He watched Michael’s gaze move over the piece. “It’s us. It’s beautiful,” Michael said, choking on the last word.

Gavin’s throat tightened. “Both pictures are the same,” Gavin admitted before Michael could pull out the second. “The other one is glass. There’s this service where you can get your artwork scanned and then etched into glass. I didn’t know which copy you’d like the most, so I got both. This way, you can choose which one you think goes best with wherever you want to put it.”

A line appeared between Michael’s brows. “I want them both.”

Gavin’s smile grew. “They’re both yours to do with as you please.”

Michael’s bright grin reappeared. “I plan to hang them side by side. This is truly gorgeous. I’m amazed at the detail. It’s like you painted it while watching us in a mirror.”

Gavin’s gaze dropped to the image of him kissing Michael’s nape. Fuck, he loved that spot. “I don’t need to be in a gallery,” Gavin said, prying the picture from Michael’s hands. “I’ll be in your bedroom. That’s better.”

“Fuck that,” Michael said, taking the frame back. “You’ll be hanging over my couch, but later,” he said, slipping the painting back in the bag. “Right now, you need to kiss me.”

Gavin didn’t waste any time wrapping Michael in his arms and capturing his mouth. He wanted everything at once. Gavin craved having Michael tell him about his day. He needed the man to spend the rest of the night kissing him. His body screamed for Gavin to fuck Michael on the table. Gavin didn’t know which direction to go. It didn’t help that Michael smelled amazing.

Gavin’s palm hit the edge of the table, making him realize he’d already backed Michael against it, as if leaning toward fucking him on it. He backed away a hair, trying to slow things down. It was Michael’s birthday. He deserved to be celebrated. Gavin needed to get his head out of the sex clouds. “I have one more gift for you,” Gavin said between kisses.

Michael’s lips shaped into a smile against his. “Is it a dick in a box?”

A snort escaped Gavin. “Now that you’ve given me an idea for your next birthday.” He tried pulling away. Michael’s arms tightened around his neck. He hugged Gavin close. Gavin stroked his back. “What is it?”

“You said that like you plan to be around for my next one.”

Gavin pried Michael’s arms loose, forcing him back enough he could hold the man’s stare. “I don’t know what you think this is, but I think you should know by now we’re in this for the long haul.”

Michael’s expression was soft and sweet. “Okay.”

Gavin bit the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing. He was so in love with this amazing man. Only a dumbass would think this was temporary. “Time to get your other gift,” Gavin urged, leading him from the kitchen.

“Oh my god. It is sex,” Michael squealed, sounding like an excited girl.

Gavin grabbed his ribs. Michael cracked him up when he acted ridiculous. “Would you come on?” Michael didn’t respond, but he let Gavin tow him outside. Gavin popped the back hatch on his SUV before stepping aside for Michael to see.

“Is that what I think it is?”

Gavin puffed out his chest. “Yep.”

“You’ve got to be fucking shitting me.”

“Nope,” Gavin said, grabbing the two-person bean bag from the back. “It’s our new gaming chair.”

“I’m speechless,” Michael said, sounding like he really was.

“It’ll be great. I promise. Come see,” Gavin said, carrying the bulky piece back to the house, trying not to laugh. Michael looked horrified. The chair was way out of style for the man’s million-dollar home. Everything Michael owned looked like it had been handpicked by a designer to create the perfect atmosphere for each room. Michael most likely didn’t understand. Not yet. Gavin would make him understand. He was about to molest Michael in this chair. It was an old fantasy he was about to make true. Gavin didn’t drop the chair until they were inside Michael’s den. He plopped down, sinking in before patting his lap for Michael to join him.

“I thought this was our gaming chair.”

“It is,” Gavin assured him. “Get your phone out before you sit.” Michael dug his phone from his pocket and then climbed into Gavin’s lap. Gavin’s heart swelled as he settled Michael back against his chest. “Open our game. Let’s finish building that new research center.”

Michael did as he bade while Gavin watched over his shoulder. “I like this,” Michael said as if admitting a dirty secret.

He had no idea Gavin was just getting started.

“What about dinner?”

Fuck. Gavin would need to move quick. He’d forgotten their dinner was getting cold in the kitchen. “It’ll hold for a few minutes while you test drive this new chair.”

Michael nodded as he readjusted his position, ensuring Gavin could see what he was doing in the Cyborg game.

Gavin’s hands slid from Michael’s waist to the button of his jeans. He felt more than heard Michael take a deep breath. Gavin slipped the button loose and slid Michael’s zipper down. Michael didn’t try stopping him.

“I’m addicted to the way you smell,” Gavin said against the side of Michael’s neck as he dove inside Michael’s jeans. Michael tossed the phone aside, giving up any pretense of paying attention to the game. Instead, he gripped Gavin’s knees and held on as Gavin stroked his cock. “I want to have you the way you have me.”

“You’ve got me,” Michael said, sounding breathless and lifting his hips to meet Gavin’s fist.

Gavin wasn’t sure that was true, but they were on their way and he needed Michael to burn alive in his arms. He needed it to be his hands that brought Michael to the edge of insanity before pushing him over. Maybe then Michael would know a second of what it was like inside Gavin’s head every hour of every day. “You’ll come for me,” Gavin promised. “And then we’ll enjoy our dinner before I fuck you on your overly expensive kitchen table.”

Michael made a choking sound.

A smile that felt evil even to him twisted Gavin’s lips. “Then I have cake,” Gavin added before opening his mouth over the side of Michael’s neck and sucking. He handled Michael’s cock the same as he would his own and swore the pleasure was his. His dick cried for attention, but it was a muted desire behind the screaming of his heart. That organ wanted Michael’s love and he wouldn’t stop until Michael was sick with the need to be with Gavin.

Michael writhed in his hold. His rapid breathing spoke volumes about how close he was to orgasm. “Gavin.” Michael’s muscles stiffened.

Gavin cupped Michael’s jaw and tilted the man’s head back so he could capture his mouth. He sucked on Michael’s bottom lip as he sent the man over the edge. Hot cum coated his fingers. He didn’t stop stroking Michael’s dick even when the man had nothing left to give. Gavin wasn’t ready to break the connection. Michael tasted too good—felt too good in his arms.

“I fucking love this chair,” Michael said against his lips.

“I knew you would,” Gavin said before going back to kissing him. Gavin had a list of mundane things in his head he intended to make amazing because they enjoyed them together. By his calculations, it would take them forever to check off each one.

* * *

Time always slipped away faster than Michael liked when he was with Gavin. They’d spent one hell of a night together. Unfortunately, their time was almost up. Soon, Gavin would be on a plane headed for Montreal for his next game and Marshall would be there so they could celebrate their birthday together.

As if thoughts of giving up his time alone with Gavin conjured him, Marshall came through the front door without knocking—like always. They were beyond boundaries. Michael treated Marshall’s house the same.

“Happy birthday,” Marshall called as he barreled into the kitchen, carrying several grocery bags. “Steaks and all the fixings, as promised,” he said, setting the bags on the counter. If he was the least bit surprised to see Gavin, he didn’t mention it. Instead, he dipped his chin at Gavin. “What’s up?” Without waiting for a response, he grabbed Michael in a bear hug, lifting his feet from the floor. “Twin!”

Michael slapped him across the back and prayed oxygen came back to his brain. “Gavin’s already dragged the grill from the garage for you.”

“Yeah?” Marshall asked, tossing a quick glance Gavin’s way. “There’s enough for three. You staying?”

“He was just about to head out,” Michael answered for him, because Gavin looked uncomfortable beneath Marshall’s stare. He’d known this moment would come. Until now, he’d managed to avoid any contact between the two. Since they both played sports that had games around Thanksgiving and Christmas, they’d made it through the holidays without having to be in the same place. If Gavin was serious about the long haul, they couldn’t dodge each other forever.

Gavin nodded. “I’m on my way out,” he said, mimicking Michael’s words.

Marshall’s disapproval was so thick it was almost tangible. “It’s your man’s birthday and you’re headed out of town. Nice,” Marshall said, still smiling, but getting his dig in.

Gavin didn’t stop smiling either. It was like they were challenging each other’s ability to play nice. “If you had a game today, that’s where’d you be. I don’t have a choice. There’s a game. I have to be there.”

Michael jumped in, hoping to make the silent pissing contest end. “It’s just a date on a calendar. We can celebrate anytime. Plus, he’s already given me my present. Look,” Michael said, fetching the paintings where he’d left them on the kitchen table. He handed them over. “Gavin made them for me. Aren’t they amazing?”

“I didn’t know you painted,” Marshall said, inspecting the canvas boards.

Michael’s mouth fell open. “You were his best friend for years. How did you not know that?”

Marshall shrugged and set the paintings aside. “Anyhow, I brought some steaks. You care if I go ahead and fire up the grill? I’m starving.”

Michael nodded, setting Marshall free from a conversation he obviously didn’t want to have, but he was still reeling. If Marshall knew Gavin at all, he should’ve known that. He glanced Gavin’s way. Gavin didn’t look upset or offended.

Gavin winked once they were alone. “I guess it could’ve gone worse, but maybe it’s a good thing I have a flight to catch.”

“Thank you for trying. I’m sorry things are so awkward. Hopefully, they’ll get better with time.”

Gavin shrugged and pulled Michael into his arms. “It’s hard to make me uncomfortable. He’ll get used to having me around, and if he doesn’t, it doesn’t change anything. I’d still rather be with you than anywhere else in the world, even if Marshall glares at me the whole time.”

Michael chewed his bottom lip, biting back a smile. All he ever did was smile anymore, and it was all Gavin’s fault. “Kiss me before Marshall gets back,” Michael whispered.

Gavin’s eyes flashed with devilry as he boxed Michael in against the counter. He moved slow, driving Michael insane. Finally, he dipped his head and touched his lips to Michael’s. “Mine,” Gavin mouthed against Michael’s lips so quietly Michael felt more than heard it.

“Damn, I’ll miss you this weekend.” The admission was out of Michael’s control.

A throat cleared behind them, and Gavin straightened away. His gaze remained locked on Michael. His lips twisted into a wicked smile that had Michael pressing his hand against his stomach to quell the butterflies.

“I guess I’d better grab my bags.” Gavin backed away as he made the claim.

On a sigh, Michael switched his gaze Marshall’s way and set Gavin free. Marshall shot him a look Michael couldn’t read, but he got the impression it was disapproval. Since Michael didn’t care to see it, he watched Gavin make his way down the hall. Damn, he loved watching Gavin’s body move.

“You’ve got it bad,” Marshall muttered as he dug through Michael’s silverware drawer.

It wasn’t like Michael could deny it. “Do you need any help?”

“Just see your man off,” Marshall said, shooting him another dark look before heading back outside to the grill.

With a weary sigh, Michael went looking for Gavin. He couldn’t fix everything, but being with Gavin fixed everything for him. “Do you have everything ready to go?” Michael asked as he cleared the door.

Gavin overcame him, snatching him off the floor into a bear hug. A loud laugh escaped Michael. It was as if only a few minutes in Marshall’s company had already turned Gavin into the fool he’d been back when he’d been Marshall’s best friend. He pressed several noisy kisses to the side of Michael’s neck before releasing him. “Okay. Stop playing around. I have to go. Dang.”

Michael shook his head at Gavin’s ridiculousness. “Kiss me and go, then,” Michael said, using the same put-out tone as Gavin.

Gavin’s expression turned serious. Michael’s heart turned over in his chest. The distance between them disappeared. Their mouths collided. Michael’s throat swelled at the sweetness of their kiss. In times like these, he caught glimpses of their future together, and it looked beautiful. Gavin’s tongue moved against his. Michael clung to his wide shoulders, feeling small and protected.

“I’ll call you as soon as I’m settled,” Gavin promised as he pulled away.

Michael nodded, incapable of speech. He followed Gavin down the hall and to the front door, fighting the urge to follow him all the way to the airport. Sometimes it sucked being an adult. He had to suck it up and watch Gavin go.

When Gavin was gone, and the door shut tight behind him, Michael turned to find Marshall watching him. Concern etched his brother’s every feature. Michael comforted himself that Marshall had—at least—waited until they were alone.

“So, Gavin Weeks... again.”

Michael flashed him a smile and moved to sit on one of the barstools at the bar, separating the kitchen from the living room. “Seems so.”

“Why?” Marshall asked without preamble before attempting to backtrack when he obviously heard the same condemnation in his tone that Michael did. “I mean, in high school, I could kind of see it. Despite all his bullshit slurs and denying you in public, he wasn’t good at hiding the way he looked at you. It was always as if the rest of the world disappeared. That’s why I never got mad for real when he would call you a homo or whatever, because I knew he didn’t mean it, and you never acted as if it bothered you much. I thought you had things under control. That’s why I didn’t speak up about a lot of things.” Marshall snagged a stool from the bar and pulled it closer, while still holding Michael’s gaze. “Like I said, I get why you let shit go on back then. What I don’t understand is why you’d willingly choose to take him back now, after all the things he’s done.”

Michael wasn’t offended. In fact, it warmed his heart that Marshall cared. He was the only person Michael could speak to about any of this. No one else cared to hear it or knew all the details of their past. That was why Michael didn’t hesitate being honest. “For one thing, it was a long time ago. I can’t lie and say it doesn’t still sting when I think about that night and Zoey, but his family isn’t like ours. He was scared of being like me. I get that. My life hasn’t been easy.”

Marshall’s disapproving expression didn’t falter. “It wasn’t just Zoey. She was only one of many girls.” Michael’s stomach twisted at Marshall’s words, but Marshall wasn’t finished. “And you weren’t the only guy, so don’t tell me he was hiding or scared.”

It took every ounce of Michael’s willpower to keep breathing. Marshall’s words hurt more than Michael could’ve dreamed. He’d known—sort of—about the girls. They were cover. But other guys, Michael couldn’t take it. That meant he wasn’t special, only convenient. What about now? Was that what he was now—convenient? “That’s the first I’ve heard of other guys,” Michael said, hearing how tight his voice had gone.

Marshall looked uncomfortable—like he regretted bringing it up, but it was too late. The words were spoken, never to be unheard. “Really, it was just one other guy.” Marshall hesitated again, making Michael want to shake him before he spoke up and shattered Michael’s heart. “Me.”

The air left Michael’s lungs in a whoosh. If it had been Marshall’s intention to break him, he’d succeeded. Michael couldn’t breathe past the betrayal. “What?” Even Michael heard the panic in his question. How could Gavin come back into his life after that? “What?” he repeated, sounding closer to an enraged roar this time than a question.

Marshall looked panicked now that he seemed to realize his confession had hit home. He scrambled to explain. “We only made out—like kissing, but I thought you knew. I thought—surely—he would’ve told you everything by now.”

“No,” Michael growled. “No one has ever told me shit. Including you.” Just made out? It was his fucking twin. The better twin, at that. How could they have kissed? David’s claims had been true that night. He was the one Gavin had settled for because he couldn’t have Marshall.

Marshall stood. “I shouldn’t have said anything. You looked happy with him, and that was a long time ago. I thought you knew,” he added, sounding helpless. “You’re my brother, Michael,” Marshall finished lamely.

That added a whole new level of betrayal to the mix. They were brothers. “In one breath, you say you knew about us, and in another, you admit to being the other guy. I’m just...” Michael stared at Marshall, feeling attacked from all sides. “I don’t understand.”

The devastation in Marshall’s eyes was the only thing keeping Michael sane. “I wasn’t like you,” Marshall said with heartbreak etching every word. “I’m not like you,” Marshall restated. “I’m not brave enough to endure the way you do. Back then, being normal meant everything to me. I didn’t want to want him, but you did. That’s why I stepped back and pretended not to know. That’s why I kept playing the part I’d set for myself. The one I keep setting for myself. You get to be you. Always have.” The more Marshall spoke, the more Michael’s heart broke. He wished his brother wouldn’t choose this life in the closet, but he understood. It wasn’t easy to be him, and he didn’t have the world looking at him the way Marshall did. But the way Marshall sounded—like there was no air—Michael didn’t want that for him. “I never would’ve hurt you,” Marshall said, and Michael couldn’t doubt him. Marshall wasn’t that guy. He always smiled and made everyone else laugh. It broke Michael’s heart, because Marshall was miserable inside where no one could see.

“I know,” Michael finally said, setting Marshall free of his guilt. Too bad it didn’t help Michael’s heart. He’d been certain he’d been meant for Gavin, and that was why they’d found their way back to each other. Now it felt like another of life’s cruel jokes. Michael had no clue how he’d handle this. He stood. “I guess I should start the salad while you cook. We won’t turn twenty-four again. Have you heard from Mom and Dad?”

“They’re in St. Martin. Michael.”

At the sound of his name, Michael finally met Marshall’s gaze. He tried for a smile. “It’s okay. I’ve always been alone, right?”

Marshall growled. “I didn’t mean to fuck things up.”

The thing was—Michael wasn’t so sure that was true, but he didn’t have the energy to fight. “Go cook. It’s fine.”

With one last defeated look, Marshall finally went back outside. Michael went through the motions of chopping all the vegetables Marshall had brought. He kept his mind carefully blank. Right now, he couldn’t picture Gavin kissing Marshall, whispering secrets to him in the dark. He couldn’t be the second choice again. Michael just couldn’t.