Chapter 11

Cody

Cody couldn't believe how quickly the two months that followed flew by. Did he use the little tidbit of information he had on Gavin against him? No. He wanted to, but he didn't. Why? Because it would hurt Jessie, and that would hurt Julie. Would it have bothered him to see Gavin feeling a bit of pain? Not at all. Julie was hurting because of him, and that was wrong, especially after he'd heard from so many people that she was a daddy's girl. Cody wasn't sure exactly what had gone wrong, but from the one time Julie had opened up to him, he'd figured out that she felt her father didn't value her nearly as much as he did her brother. That shit was fucked up. Gavin had made a huge mistake. For as smart as the man was, he was totally oblivious to things that were right under his nose. Julie was brilliant. Gavin needed her on his team. Why he wasn't banging down her door every single day to convince her of that, Cody had no idea, but he knew that it was an enormous mistake. If Gavin spent just twenty percent of the time he spent watching Cody trying to win Julie over, he'd be leaps and bounds ahead of Cody within months. Shit! If Cody could get her to join his team, it wouldn't take but a minute for him to soar right by Gavin and Ethan. He'd tried many times, but there was one problem, and it was one Cody liked and disliked at the same time, Julie was perfect in every way. As much as the people she loved were hurting her, she was loyal to them, and that was amazing.

Cody was spending more time away from the office than ever before. He knew it needed to stop, but he was having a hard time actually making it happen. When he was with Julie, things came natural. They talked about work and development, but they talked about other things too. She loved her students and talked about them often. Some of them weren't as interested in learning as others, and she was determined to get them just as excited as the rest. The excitement she had, as she talked about things they'd learned or things they'd done, was infectious. Each time, Cody knew it put a smile on his face.

He spent a lot of time at the apartment Julie shared with her sister. Not once had Jessie spoken to him the way she had that first time. They'd actually gotten along really well after that day. One of the three of them would pick up food. They'd all eat together while watching a movie. Then Jessie would always disappear to her room, giving Cody a little time alone with Julie. Jessie never came out, but Cody knew she was paying attention. She loved her sister, and that was something he'd always respect.

Cody and Julie went out on the weekends. Some nights they'd go to dinner, and other nights they'd go for a walk or see a movie, but they always ended up back at Julie's place. Cody had offered many times to go back to his place, but each time, she'd turned him down. She used her sister as an excuse every single time. She'd say that she didn't want to leave her alone. Jessie was getting bigger by the day, but she didn't need someone with her at all times. She had nobody else, that was what Julie would say. The baby's dad wasn't around. Julie had never even met the man, and Cody could tell that bothered her. There were days Jessie seemed sad, but it wasn't over the baby. She was excited about that. Something else was bringing her down. He just couldn't tell what it was.

Cody knew Julie's excuses were total bullshit, but he never called her on it. For whatever reason, she didn't want to go to his place. Part of him, even after three months, still had doubts about Julie and her reasons for spending time with him. He tried not to think about it, but it was always there, and it kept his mind and his heart in check. He was always careful about what he said, most of the time anyway. There were times, where they'd been talking, that he'd forget who she was and speak freely, but he never said anything that could harm him or his company, not that he could remember. She was the same way. He knew she was working on something. She talked about it, but she was never specific about what it actually was. They were both holding back. That was something he was sure of.

When they weren't together, Cody found himself thinking about her and their situation. No matter what he did, she was there. The more he tried to back off and leave her alone, the more he wanted her right there with him.

Not once had he ever talked to someone for three months without doing more than kiss them, but that was exactly what he'd done with her, and it was becoming harder and harder each day. He wasn't a total asshole. That was what he'd tell himself each time he'd walk away with only a kiss. It wasn't that he didn't want her, not at all. It was the exact opposite actually. He wanted Julie more than he'd ever wanted a woman before in his life, but he couldn't do it, he couldn't have her, not in that way. That would be crossing a line that could never be uncrossed. It could change things in his life he wasn't sure he was willing to change, so he didn't. Each time he kissed her, his hands would move a little more than before. His mouth would take hers with more feeling. He'd hold her a little tighter, but that was it. That was all he could take, her mouth, and he did, every single time he saw her. He knew she felt it too. He'd feel it when she kissed him back. The feel of her hands on his arms, in his hair, or gripping his back gave her away every single time. They were both fighting. There was no doubt about that. He just wasn't sure how much longer he could fight, but he knew he had to do it, for him, for his company, and for the people in it that worked their asses off every day, not only for him, but more importantly, to put food in their family's mouths. Taking things to the next level with Julie wasn't something he could do, especially if he didn't plan to have a future with her. Did he like her? Yes. Did he care about her? He did. Did he see a future with her? That he didn't know.

By the time he went home each time he'd seen her, he was tired, but he wasn't done, not even close. He'd go into his home office and make up for the hours of work he'd missed during the day. If he didn't, he knew what would happen. Gavin and Ethan would be taking steps forward, and he'd be falling behind. That could not happen. He wouldn't let it. With each night that passed, he became more tired than the last, and the more he began to wonder if getting to know Julie was really worth it. He wasn't getting anything on her father he didn't already have, and that was the whole reason he'd talked to her in the first place, wasn't it? As many times as he'd asked her to be part of his team, Cody knew it would never happen. He'd even been sitting there when Ethan had called and begged her to work for him. She'd turned his ass down cold, and he was family. Cody had been proud of her for that. At the same time, he knew she'd never go against her father, so why the fuck was he even trying? What was he thinking?

As Cody fell into bed, he couldn't help but wonder if all the stress he was adding to his plate was worth it. What if she wasn't who she seemed? What if she really was her father's daughter? Was he putting his company at risk for no reason at all? He thought back to earlier that day. He'd been sitting in the middle of what was going to be Jessie's baby's room, putting furniture together. That was something he never thought he'd do in his life, never wanted to do, but there he was, doing it, and it wasn't even for his own child.

“What the fuck are you doing?” he asked himself, as he stared up at the ceiling above his bed, knowing he was going to be getting up in just a couple of hours. “Keep your eyes on the prize. She's fucking brilliant, but it's not her, Cody. Get your shit together. Get something on her father or uncle that won't hurt their kids. Then get the fuck out of there, use it, and take that number one spot, the one you've worked your ass off to get. Eyes on the prize.”

With that, he closed his eyes, hoping to get just the smallest bit of sleep.