Sage…

I have been here a week today and though the town is lovely; I can’t call the people welcoming. They stare at me walking the streets of the town as I’m trying to familiarize myself with where things are located; they stare at me eating at the diner, and they stare at me when I sit on the front porch with Haddie and Mr. Styles enjoying the scenery in the late evenings. I don’t know why Mr. Styles says these people are nosey they never speak to me unless I ask a question. Haddie says to not take it personally, they just need time to warm up to me. I don’t know why I even care. I don’t want anyone in my business anyway.

Haddie spoke with Mr. Styles and he is thinking about talking to me. I mean he talks to me —okay—mostly grunts but we communicate. He just won’t discuss the farm until he trusts that I am made of strong stock— whatever that means. I don’t know how to prove it to him and he is my last option. One property is tied up in probate court and the other two sellers suddenly have contracts on them. It is a waiting game now. Seems like I am always waiting. Waiting for time with my dad, waiting on the perfect time to make my escape to freedom, waiting until I turn twenty-one, and now waiting on my dream to own a farm and find my peace of mind.

I have been sitting on the porch taking in the beautiful weather today and going over my plans for the next few months. It all hinges on me finding a place of my own to call home. It sounds simple even in my head but in Comfort, Texas it’s a bit complicated. I could get my map out and find another place to go but I can feel in my bones this is the place I should be. I knew it the minute that I found this place on the map and then when I did more research the idea was not only planted in my mind but deep in my heart as well. I am too stubborn to let a few road blocks stop me. I just need more patience.

“Mr. Styles is coming over to talk with us.” I look up in surprise. I didn’t hear Haddie come out the door.

“Is he ready to talk about the farm?” I know I sound like a broken record.

“Sweet girl you are going to need to let Mr. Styles think it’s his idea to talk. He is an old man set in his old ways and everything is on his timetable. He seems to like you but with him you never know.” Haddie sits beside me on the swing and pats me on the leg. I don’t know why but this calms my worries a little. In the little time I have been here, Haddie has become important to me. My guard comes down a little more every day.

“How can you say he likes me? All he does is grunt at me or stare. I can’t ever figure the man out or get a read on him.” Mr. Styles is hard to get a word out of. The only person he talks to a lot is Haddie.

“Maybe you should just come out and ask me the questions you have for me instead of picking them out of my head by reading me.” Mr. Styles comes up behind us from the neighbor’s yard. I don’t know what to say to that. He’s right but I didn’t even think he would answer my questions. I start to apologize but Haddie speaks up.

“And how would Sage know you would answer her? Since the first day she arrived here you have had her under your microscope. You two have a lot in common the way you both keep people at arm’s length.” I look at Mr. Styles and he is looking at me. I don’t say a word. I look from Haddie’s face to Mr. Styles’ face and they look like they are having a stand-off between the two. Haddie raises her eyebrow and Mr. Styles nods. I don’t know what the private conversation with just expressions is about, but I continue to watch with fascination.

“Haddie, unless you want your gawking neighbors to know all our business, do you think we can go in your office to talk this out?” Mr. Styles asks Haddie and then he looks at me with sharp eyes. I feel like he is trying to see inside my head to see if I am going to be honest or lie. “Sage, I am going to tell you what my farm means to me and why it’s difficult for me to sell. I am going to be nothing but honest and forthcoming with you and I expect the same from you. I am going to ask you questions and I expect truthful answers. If you can’t answer my questions to my satisfaction, then this talk is over. It’s important to me so if you can’t agree to this for whatever reason then this talk is useless,” Mr. Styles says in a calm muffled voice. If I agree to this, I can buy the farm I’ve dreamed of but if I refuse or am not honest then I will need to start over. I am tired of always giving up my dreams. It’s time to decide if I can trust Haddie and Mr. Styles. I can do this. If there are any consequences, I will just face them.

“I understand. If I can’t be truthful, I will tell you.” Mr. Styles nods and Haddie gets up and leads us inside the house to her office. I don’t say anything else, lost in my own thoughts. Mr. Styles says nothing else either. When we reach Haddie’s office she opens the door and steps in and shakes her head as she stands by the door.

“This is a friendly talk not the dentist’s office. Just relax. You two can use my office as long as you need to.” My stomach has a knot in it at the idea of Haddie leaving. I’m not scared of Mr. Styles, but he can be moody.

“No, Haddie, I think Sage would probably be more comfortable if you stayed. I thought I made that clear on the porch you would be included in this conversation. I might need your memory to help me if Sage has any questions and for me to remember what I agree to.” This makes Mr. Styles and Haddie both laugh.

“We are all in trouble if you rely on my memory. Your mind is as sharp as a tack.” Haddie shuts the door and moves to her desk chair. Mr. Styles sits in one chair and I sit in the other.

“Haddie, please stay. You have helped so much while I have been here, and you deserve to learn a little bit about me. I just ask that whatever you learn, you will please keep it between us,” I ask the two of them; looking at both their faces.

“We would never gossip about you dear,” Haddie tells me. I believe her. I look at Mr. Styles and he nods in agreement.

“Let’s get down to the nitty gritty. I have the farm that my wife, Christine and I, were given from my folks when we married. I later paid them full price for the property when I made the money from the land. That place has our tears, our joy, our sweat, and our blood in it. Our family cemetery is on that land. It has most of my family in it. We raised our babies, our crops, and our animals there. If the walls of the house could talk it would tell the history of five generations of the Styles family and when I take my last breath I want to be laid to rest by my Christine and the rest of my family. Our family bloodline is coming up short. The ones that are left want nothing to do with farm living even if I could find them.” Mr. Styles hesitates, and I see the unshed tears in his eyes. This man is sharing his memories and his pain is evident. “I can’t handle the farm anymore and it’s a challenging thing for me to admit that to anyone. I have a hardware store that makes my living now, but I won’t sell to just anyone and I have special stipulations.” I wait for him to go on because I see he’s having a tough time. “I need to know the person that buys the place will honor my stipulations and I need to know the person I sell it to is a good person that wants to grow a family there. That is tradition for my family and even though the person buying it won’t be blood I want it to still have a like thinking family there. I don’t want someone buying it and then turning around and selling it within a few years. You just don’t come across to me as a farm-living person. If I’m wrong, then change my mind. Do you have any idea of the amount of work that goes into daily farm work and what kind of farm are you wanting?” Mr. Styles finally sits quietly. I look at Haddie and she smiles at me. I know she’s trying to calm my nerves and encourage me at the same time.

“A few years ago, my dad passed away. My mom and I were never close. My mom and I had a difference of opinion and I left.” I keep my eyes on my feet, avoiding the set of eyes on me. “My dad always said that one day we would buy a farm, but his days ran out and it’s the only thing in my life that I know for sure I will never change my mind on. Even if the farm never becomes profitable—I want—no I need a farm here in Comfort.” Every word I have said is true. I know this is a pipe dream, but I feel like this is something that will keep me connected with my dad’s memory. This way I can keep his dream alive. I just feel vulnerable talking about my dad. I feel the tears in my eyes that are on the verge of falling.

“Do you mind telling me how old you are and how old you were when you left home? You look very young.” Mr. Styles looks at me and I look at Haddie. She has a copy of my fake identification card, but she didn’t share with Mr. Styles. I knew I could trust her.

“It’s alright honey, just tell him.” I know Haddie is going to be disappointed in me for the lie I let her believe but it’s time to be honest. I just hope I still have a place to sleep tonight.

“I’m sorry for deceiving you Haddie, but I’m not twenty-three, I’m only twenty years old. I left home when I was sixteen and I’ve been on my own since then. I have been all over the United States.” I watch as Haddie opens and then closes her mouth and then she looks at Mr. Styles and they are communicating by facial expressions again. It’s getting hard to swallow as I wait for one of them to speak.

“I don’t know where to start with all that. I knew you were a wildcard but not to this extent. Is your real name Sage since you have fake cards? Are you going to run out on your bill here? How would a high school dropout have the money to buy anything?” Those are the first questions Mr. Styles wants to ask me? He is more worried about Haddie than anything else. That makes me smile.

“Mr. Styles calm down. Sage would not run out on me. Just let her explain.” I hear the words coming out of Haddie’s mouth, but she doesn’t look confident.

“My middle name is Sage and I started using it instead of my first name when I left home. My credit card is a prepaid and Haddie can run the amount of my bill anytime she wants. That’s for last week and this one. It puts the amount on hold, but I can guarantee you that I can stay here as long as I want, and it will be covered. Please, run it for a month at your convenience.” I look at Haddie and she gives me a small smile. I understand her being unsure. I’m a stranger and she has no reason to trust me. I look to Mr. Styles who has remained quiet. “I was in my last year of high school because I was able to skip a grade of school by taking a placement test. When I left home, I did a homeschool program on my computer and completed it ahead of schedule. I have also completed all but one semester of my college online. I have been studying agricultural science and working on my bachelor of science degree. I have also been doing jobs on farms to get hands-on experience and learning how to do soil tests, but I didn’t get enough experience to do it myself without assistance from a lab. Except for my living and traveling expenses I have saved every penny. My dad had an educational fund set up for me that I have had access to, and it guaranteed my schooling. My attorney has helped me with all of this plus I have access to part of my trust fund that had nothing to do with my dad’s will. I have an education and plan on continuing it. I know how to manage my money and with the real estate fair market price for this part of Texas I can afford to buy a farm.” I hope this answers most of Mr. Styles questions. I don’t want to elaborate anymore. I don’t even want to think about everything else.

“Sage, honey, do you mean that you haven’t been in contact with your mom since you left? That’s been four years. Don’t you think that whatever the reason you two couldn’t get along may have changed by now? If you were mine, I would go to the ends of the earth looking for you and let me tell you whenever I found you there would be consequences.” I can see by the stern look in Haddie’s eyes that she would no doubt still be looking for me if I was her child. I think that Haddie would be the perfect mom.

“The woman gave birth to you. Don’t you think it’s cruel to make her suffer over not knowing her child is safe?” Mr. Styles isn’t going to let me leave it as it is.

“I understand—no I guess I don’t really—but I want to assure you both that the only thing my mom would want from me is the money my dad left me. Her and her boyfriend both.” I leave it at that. “That’s all I am sharing today about my family. I will be forced to deal with them soon enough so the less I have to think about it the better.” I see the questions in their eyes but what I don’t see is pity. I only see acceptance.

“Since you’re going to be with us a while it’s about time you start calling me Nick. That’s my given name so no more Mr. Styles. Haddie is the only one to call me that and she only does it to rile me up— it’s about time that changes. Can you just give me your first name? I won’t use it but if we are going to be friends, then we need to be on a first name basis.” He gives me the first smile that I have seen on the man. I look at Haddie and she has a smile on her lips like always. I feel like a burden has been lifted and I feel more at home than I have in a long time.

“My first name is Lyric, and I hate that I haven’t been able to use it because my dad gave me that name.” I feel the tears slip from my eyes and I can’t make them stop. I feel raw from sharing my memories and I just miss my dad. Nick and Haddie both come and stand on each side of me as they bring me close and embrace me. The comfort I feel brings another rush of tears and I feel the safest I have felt since the last time my dad held me.

Nick steps back from us and turns my head towards him. I see the concern coming from him. “I’ll come by tomorrow right after lunch and the three of us will go out to the farm to have a look around.” I start to say something but stop abruptly. Haddie goes back to her desk and grabs some tissues and hands them to me. Nick is still looking at me.

“If you need to say something just say it,” Nick blurts out.

“I just wanted to say thank you,” I look from Nick to Haddie, “for everything that you have done for me and for giving me a chance. I promise I won’t let you down if it’s in my control. This has been my dream since I lost my dad.”

“We’ll see. Now be ready tomorrow.” Nick turns and leaves. I don’t blame him for not trusting me. I run every time I am faced with trouble, but I’m tired of running and this is where it stops.