Chapter Seventeen

Jeff exited Principal Mallory’s office and walked in the direction of his classroom for a few seconds before taking a sharp detour toward the auditorium. He had to at least let the kids know what was happening before he went AWOL. They deserved to hear it from him and not some chirpy morning announcement.

Jeff was absolutely terrified of facing everyone. He doubted that any of them would care that he was gay, especially when half of them were on the spectrum themselves, but he was still worried about them looking at him differently. The thought of them knowing this personal bit of information about him was uncomfortable and unsettling. Nevertheless, Jeff was always telling them to let go of their pride and embarrassment when they were in his care. What kind of teacher would he be if he wasn’t willing to return the favor?

Jeff looked both ways before sneaking into the drama room and following the sound of voices out onto the stage. Most of the cast members were huddled in a circle on stage left and speaking in hushed, clipped tones. Jeff immediately scanned the group for Cam, but he did not see him. Jeff couldn’t decide if he should be relieved or disappointed by that.

“Of course he didn’t say anything,” Danielle was saying. “Somebody try calling Cam again.”

“His phone’s obviously turned off, Dani,” said Rin.

“Uh, guys,” said Eddie, pointing at Jefferson who was now standing only a few feet away.

The rest of the circle turned to face him, they all had mildly shell-shocked expressions on their faces.

“Mr. Martin!” Danielle shouted. She ran up to him and threw her arms around him before he could protest. Jeff patted her back once and then twice all the while looking up at the catwalk so he wouldn’t cry.

“What’s going on?” she asked when she finally pulled back. “We saw that picture of you with Cam’s dad. People were saying that you were using Cam to seduce him or something and that you were going to be fired for misconduct. We didn’t believe that of course, but then you didn’t show up for rehearsals and we started to get worried.”

Jeff opened up his mouth and then closed it. God this was going to be even harder than he thought.

“I came to tell you,” he said finally. “That rehearsals are going to be canceled until further notice.”

“What?!” said several panicked voices in unison.

Jeff hung his head.

“I’m sorry. I tried to tell Principal Mallory to let you guys continue working on the play without me, but he said there’s no way he can do that.”

“Without you?” Kendra asked. “You’re not really being fired, are you?”

Jeff closed his eyes.

“I’m being put on paid administrative leave.”

“But why?” asked Sophia. Her voice sounded so small and quiet compared to the others.

There were a dozen pair of eyes staring at him intently. All of them sad and confused, not a single one of them accusing. Jeff really couldn’t take much more of this.

“I’m not at liberty to discuss,” he lied.

“It’s that stupid picture, isn’t it?” said Jessica. “I swear to God Mr. M, I’m going to call an emergency student council meeting about this. It’s not right for you to be punished for something like that. No straight person would be.”

“Yeah,” Jackson agreed. “We’ll organize a protest or something.”

“No,” Jeff said. “I—that’s okay guys. Really. All I need you to do is keep practicing on your own time. Hopefully this will all be cleared up quickly, but if it’s not we can move opening night back by a couple of days.” He looked for Enrique and caught his eyes. They were red-rimmed as if he’d been crying.

“Enrique,” Jeff said softly.

“Yes, sir?”

“You didn’t hear this from me, but there’s a free soundproof meeting room at the library across the street. If you were to move rehearsals over there and lead them yourself, I don’t think anyone would be able to stop you. You guys can continue running lines and practicing choreography. Tariq can help you with any singing or music related questions, right?”

Tariq nodded sternly. He had this stoic expression on his face that was only marred by the twitching of his right eyebrow.

“See if you can get Adam to help you rent out any equipment you might need from the AV club. You guys have worked so hard for this. Don’t let the school or my absence or anything else take that away from you, okay?” Jeff blinked rapidly against the tears that were now welling. “I’m so proud of you guys.”

“What about Cam?” asked Rin. “He didn’t know about you and his dad, did he?”

“No,” Jeff answered honestly. “He didn’t.”

The room was deadly silent for a moment. He could sense that the kids wanted to ask more questions, but Jeff just sniffed and said, “I should go.”

Nobody tried to stop him as he turned around and exited stage left. Jeff walked quickly down the hall without looking back and made a conscious effort of hardening his heart. When he opened the door to his classroom, Cam was there pacing up and down the aisles between the desks. He stopped in his tracks when Jeff walked in. The sound of the door clicking shut rang in the air between them. Jeff couldn’t say that he was surprised to see him.

“How long have you been in here?” he asked.

Cam didn’t answer.

Jeff sighed and walked over to his desk. He sat down as calmly as he could manage and waited for Cameron to speak. Cam walked slowly toward him and settled into a stiff, angry posture a few feet away.

“You know, you actually had me believing you cared about me for a second there,” he said.

Jeff sucked air through his teeth. He thought he was prepared for that particular blow, but it still hurt like being hit with a freight train.

“Cam, I do care—”

“But do you?” Cam continued, cutting him off. “Do you really? Or did you only care about my grades in relation to your precious play and how often you got to see my dad?”

Jeff kept quiet.

“You know,” Cam said quietly. “Tons of people already thought I was gay because I joined a freaking musical. And I thought, so what? Who cares what they think. But this,” Cameron gestured at an invisible object in front of him. “I’m never going to hear the end of it. Do you have any idea how many times I got asked about you and my ‘fag father’ today?”

“I’m sorry,” Jeff whispered.

He hadn’t felt this helpless since his parents had kicked him out of their house as a teenager. Cam continued ranting as if Jeff hadn’t spoken at all.

“I just don’t understand it. My dad has never been into dudes before. What the hell did you say to him to get him to kiss you like that? Is this all some gross deal you’ve worked out in exchange for helping me graduate? Is that why you gave me a leading role in the first place?”

His voice was getting increasingly louder with each accusation. Jeff took a deep breath and gripped the edge of his desk.

“Cameron,” he said, voice deadly calm. “I didn’t use you to get to your father. You got the part because you’re the actor I believe is best suited for the role. Everyone else in the play agrees with me. And I tutored you because I wanted to do whatever I could to help you succeed and still be able to participate in the musical if that’s what you wanted to do. I had no intentions of going after your father. The night I had dinner with you guys was my first time meeting him. And I promise you that I never coerced him or forced myself on him in any way. In fact, he was the one who had to convince me to go out with him.”

“So you’re actually dating and stuff?”

“Yes.”

“For how long?”

“A couple of months.”

“What if I don’t believe you?”

“Well, believe what you want,” Jeff said, more harshly than he intended. “But it’s the truth.”

“I love your father, Cam,” he added more gently. “And I’m pretty certain he loves me too.”

Cam’s fists were clenched at his sides and his whole body was shaking with anger and frustration.

“And when were you planning on telling me this, huh?”

Jeff’s shoulders slumped.

“I wanted to tell you,” he admitted. “But your father wanted to keep it a secret. He wasn’t sure how you’d react, and he wanted to wait until the time was right.”

Cam snorted.

“Is this what you had in mind?”

Jeff shook his head.

“No. Cameron, it’s not. Believe me, the last thing I wanted was for you to get hurt. I’m sorry that things happened this way. Is there any way I can make it up to you?”

“Yes.” Cameron knelt down and picked up his backpack off of the floor.

Jeff sat up straight, trying not to look too eager.

“What is it?”

Cam took a few steps forward so that he was right in Jeff’s face.

“Stay away from my father.”