CHAPTER SIXTEEN
This was Webb’s tenth day with Dr. Paul. His emotions were a wreck. The shrink had dug so deep into his past, he now knew his potty habits during kindergarten—or so it seemed. Memories of his tempestuous past with his father were dredged forth. The conversation Webb had on the phone that night with his mother, was a rough one. She dilly-dallied in telling him the truth, until he threatened to fly home and talk to her in person.
Her tears started and so did the apologies for not divorcing the man sooner. Dark dreams he’d been plagued with began to make sense. Slowly, the yelling, beating demon acquired the enraged face of his drunken father.
Dr. Paul didn’t stop probing there. No, he’d inquired into Webb’s service record, his time as a SEAL. Of every person he’d killed. Faces he’d rather forget. It was day after day of painful emotional exploration.
Then came their huge argument. The good doctor told Webb to drop all communication with Gracie. The educated asswipe had the audacity to claim that clinging to this woman was stunting his emotional healing. The two had nearly come to blows. Hell, his feelings for Gracie were too strong to just drop.
Webb didn’t know how much more he could take. He sat in the psychiatrist’s torture room, otherwise known as an office, and waited for Dr. Paul.
The side door opened, and the shrinkmiester strode in. “Sorry I’m late. I was conferring with a colleague about your case.” Dr. Paul sat and stared at Webb. “He agrees with me your connection to this woman, at this point of your therapy, is unhealthy.”
Bastard.
Dr. Paul folded his hands on the desk. “Did you talk to her last night? Explain things were over?”
“I texted her, as usual.” He leaned toward the shrink. “Get this through your head. When a man finds a woman he’s compatible with in a lot of ways, someone he thinks about all the time, a woman he respects and adores, he’ll fight to keep her. I refuse to call it quits. She’s been hurt by men before. I won’t have my name added to the list.”
“You’re jeopardizing your progress.”
“I came to you for help with my reckless behavior and any PTSD issues I was dealing with. Problems I’d been having long before I met her. So stay the hell out of my love life.”
Dr. Paul propped his entwined fingers under his chin, an air of superiority about him. “Do you honestly expect me to believe you fell in love in three days? That’s how long you two saw each other, right?” He smirked at Webb.
He worked at keeping his hands coiled around the arms of his chair and not around the counselor’s neck. “You’ve never met my Gracie. She’s so special, it could easily happen. Look, I’m not saying I’m ready to pop the question. Although the idea has occurred to me. She’s asked for time so we can build trust and work on a relationship, which sounds reasonable to me. I’m giving it to her.”
“Then give it to yourself, too. Tell her you need to work through some rough issues with me and you’ll be in touch with her as soon as you’re emotionally able.” He tilted his head. “I’m betting this amazing woman will understand.”
As dusk was starting to settle over New York Harbor, Webb called Gracie. This conversation had to be done in a phone call not an impersonal text.
“Hello?”
“Hey, sweetheart. How are you?” He stared off at the Statue of Liberty.
“Okay, I guess. How about you? You sound strange, hero.”
Hero, her pet name for him. Damn, he missed hearing it. He leaned forward on the wooden bench, his thighs spread. “I had another rough day with Dr. Paul. I don’t know how much more of him I can take.”
“Tell me.”
There was caring in her voice and hell he wanted wrapped in her arms more than anything. “I need to see you. I’ve got some tough things to say and it would help if I could see your reaction.”
“Webb? What the hell is happening?”
“Well, I’ve remembered my alcoholic father abused me. Needless to say, I’ll be watching my alcohol intake from now on. Since my pre-teen years I’ve had these dreams about a dark monster chasing me. Now I know it was my father.”
“Oh, hero, no.” One of her cats meowed and purred in the background.
“Dr. Paul says more intense work is ahead. He wants me to break off contact with you so my mood changes won’t affect our relationship. I just wanted you to know this will be the last you’ll be hearing from me for a while.” He took a deep breath and stared at the blades of grass between his sneakers. “I’m a wreck emotionally. I’d be no good to you.”
“Whatever you want, Webb.”
“Goodbye, sweetheart.”
“Take care. Be well.” She ended the call and just like that all the color went out of his world.
****
Her period was five days late.
It had to be her nerves. She hadn’t heard from Webb for two days and much as she hated to admit it, she missed his crazy texts. Her mind insisted his farewell was another bad boy tossing her to the side. Her heart, on the other hand, wanted to believe every word he’d said. He simply needed time to work through some heavy past issues. One side of her argued with the other and her emotions were all over the place. Sometimes she was so angry, she wanted to grab her cork screw and dig the balls off the entire male population. At other times, she wanted to cry with deep sadness.
“With my mind and heart at constant war, they could cause my period to be five days late. Right, Cisco?” Gracie petted him and he purred, sucking his soggy teddy bear.
“I mean I’m on the pill. I can’t be pregnant.” She reached for her phone and called Diana Carson, her next door neighbor and retired nurse practitioner.
“Hey, Gracie. What’s up?”
“Are you busy? Could you come over for some girl talk?”
“Sure, I’m on my way. Put the coffee pot on.”
Gracie had their Wild Women mugs on the dining room table when Diana rapped on the door and walked in. She stooped to greet the cats, while Gracie set out the sugar substitute and creamer. The pot finished brewing and she placed it on the table, too. “Oreos or Nutter Butters?”
“Oreos.” Diana sat and stared at Gracie. “What’s wrong? You look pale. Are you getting another sinus infection?”
Relief washed over her. She hadn’t thought of that possibility. “Could that be why my period’s five days late? I’m on the pill. My other sinus infection didn’t affect my cycle, but a relapse could be the cause. Right?”
Diana poured the coffee. “Pill or no pill, you can’t get pregnant unless you’ve been having sex.” Her hand stilled over the little bowl of sweetner packets. “Have you been having sex? With who? Oh hon, tell me. I could use some excitement on a drizzly Thursday.”
Gracie told her friend about the purse snatching and meeting Webb. Their having fantastic sex. She shared everything.
“Did you use a condom every time?”
“No, he’s a football player and tested often by the medical team. I knew I was okay. Besides, I’m on the pill.” Gracie stared at the tiny smile Diana sported. “What?”
“What antibiotics were you on? I forget.”
Gracie told her and Diana sighed.
“I don’t like the sound of that sigh,” Gracie said.
“For some women, strong antibiotics like those reduce the effectiveness of birth control pills.”
Her stomach did a back flip. “No. No, now, that’s not funny. Don’t tease me like that.”
Diana squeezed Gracie’s hand. “How regular are you?”
“Very.”
“Have you been under stress?”
She blinked back tears and nodded. Pregnant? Oh, that could so not be true.
Fifteen minutes later, they both ran into the drugstore. Diana rushed to the aisle for home pregnancy tests and Gracie grabbed a couple boxes of tissues, a jug of orange juice, and two more packs of Oreos.
Webb had dropped her. She couldn’t be pregnant. Prickles of unease skimmed over her skin. How would she handle it if she was?
Diana, holding a box of tissues, stood outside Gracie’s bathroom door while she peed on two different sticks. She placed them on the vanity and pulled up her pants. “Come in and watch with me. I need someone to hold my hand.”
“Girlfriend, it’ll be alright no matter what. You can handle this.”
Would the college keep her on as a basketball coach if she had a live basketball under her clothes? She didn’t get paid as much as a man would in her position, but she’d paid cash for her modest ranch and vehicle and put some money in the bank. Her online teaching pay took care of her utilities and cat food. But the expenses of a baby? Her book royalties had better skyrocket.
Diana leaned over. “I see a plus sign.” She pointed to the other one. “I see one there, too.”
Gracie saw spots.