Aunt Kay didn't say anything about Brenon's goodbye kiss on my cheek or our closeness during the meeting with the Elders. For that, I was grateful. I was still learning how to deal with the emotions regarding having my aunt back in my life in this capacity. There hadn't been time for me to process the information from the last few days, which may be a good thing in the long run. Knowing me, I'd overthink it all until I was a trembling mess huddled in a corner somewhere if given the chance.

I paused in front of the room with the spell books, realizing for the first time that I wasn't a broken mess at having found out the truth of my birth and all the things that I never knew. Was it just the lack of time to stop and think or was I getting better at dealing with things out of my control?

"Arabella, you coming?" Aunt Kay was already seated at the table, opening the book that had the notes about opening the gate.

"Sorry, lost in my own world." I joined her at the table and put on my best attentive student expression.

She closed the book and set her hand on top of it. "You doing okay? You've had a lot to think about, and we haven't had a chance to talk about it all."

"I'm not sure how I'm supposed to be doing," I said. There wasn't a road map for dealing with this type of news.

"You were so determined to meet Tristan. I don't have to worry about you running off, do I?"

My brow furrowed. "Are you kidding me? That's the last thing on my mind right now."

"Oh, I see. Yes, you are a bit distracted by the Ringmaster."

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. This was not the conversation I wanted to have with her.

Aunt Kay leaned closer and lowered her voice. "Are you sure you can trust him? He's not holding something against you or forcing you?"

I shook my head. "No, Aunt Kay. Is it so hard to believe that maybe he's a good guy under all the scars?"

"The scars have nothing to do with my concern for you. The fact that he's Fae is what worries me."

"Even my mother hooked up with a Fae," I said. "Maybe it just runs in my blood."

"Don't joke about this, Arabella. He's more dangerous than you know. Aside from the damage breaking the curse could cause you, there's other reasons I wouldn't agree to them doing that while they remained in our realm."

Now my curiosity was firing. "What do you mean?"

She let out a sigh. "I've heard stories of the things he can do with his magic, even under the curse. I can't imagine the power he'd have without it."

"You know he wouldn't hurt me," I said.

She smiled, but her eyes looked sad. "Let's just agree that the sooner we can get their kind back where they belong, the better off we'll all be."

I bit the inside of my cheek, forcing myself to keep from speaking. She wasn't even willing to give him a chance. But they were preparing to send him, and all the other members of the circus back to Faerie. Was there any point in getting into an argument with her when there wouldn't be a Brenon to fight about in a matter of days?

"Can we just get this over with?" I asked. "I'd like to open the gate as soon as Terra is defeated so we can be done with this."

"Of course," Aunt Kay said, turning back to me. "Now, tell me how your magic works."

"What do you mean?" I thought back to the times I'd managed to call to the magic I held. It felt like lightning coursing through my body. I wasn't sure how I controlled it. Wasn't that what she was here to help with?

"All of us channel the power of the earth differently. And to be honest, I'm not sure what your magic would be like since it's half Dark Fae, and there are few survivors who have seen that magic in use."

"Gia has." The words came from my mouth before I could stop myself.

"She told you?" Aunt Kay asked.

I nodded. "She also told me how you all kicked her out."

"It's not quite that simple. We can discuss that later, right now, I want to talk about you."

How did I make the magic happen? I'd used it against Terra. That had been how I discovered it. It was like a rush of electricity running through my body. I focused on that memory, and I could practically feel the sizzling of the energy as it coursed through my veins. My fingers felt like they had static electricity buzzing on them.

"Oh, my," Aunt Kay's eyes were locked on my hands.

I looked down and noticed that there were sparks on my fingertips, flashing in blue and white miniature bolts of lightning. Just like the static electricity my blankets made in the winter. Startled, I squeezed my hands into fists and let go of the memory of facing off against Terra. "I'm still not sure how I do it, I guess I just think about it?"

"That is impressive," Aunt Kay said. "I had wondered how you were able to make magic without a spell."

She took a deep breath and closed her eyes, raising her hands to the ceiling, then setting them down, palm up on her knees. She whispered words that I couldn't make out and then opened her eyes. Little sparks, just like mine, danced on her fingertips, popping and jumping from finger to finger.

Smiling, I leaned closer to her hand. "Just like me."

Aunt Kay closed her hands into fists, the same way I had done and the sparks vanished. "Except I have to use a spell to make any magic happen. Without the words, there's no magic for a Sayge."

"Oh." I sat back against the chair. "What does that mean for me when it comes to the gate?"

"I think it solves a lot of our problems. I was going to see if we could combine the words for several spells to create one that would call down the gate, but I don't know if we'll need to do that."

Aunt Kay picked up a pencil and set it on the table in front of me. "Try to move this pencil to the other side of the table."

"How?" I asked.

"The same way you made those sparks," she said.

Staring at the pencil, I wondered how I'd get it to move. The electricity had seemed to come when I thought about it. Would a pencil be the same way? I imagined the yellow stick rolling across the table.

Nothing happened.

I looked back up at my aunt. "I don't think it works the same way. The first time I used magic, I didn't even know what I was doing. I'm pretty sure I took the magic that Terra had used on me and turned it back on her."

"Try again."

Staring at the pencil, I thought about the first time I'd used the power on purpose. It had been at Joe's, and it wasn't much different than this situation where I had called to it, urging it to flow through me. Taking a deep breath, I thought about movement, wind, and magnetic energy. The things that might push or pull an object. Holding the thought of what it might feel like to have the pencil rolling inside me, I focused on it until I felt a strange wave run through me, traveling down my arms. It was like the feeling you got when your stomach flipped before you dropped from a height on an amusement park ride. As the feeling reached my fingertips, the pencil rolled right off the table.

"Whatever you just did, that's how you use your magic," Aunt Kay said.

I blinked a few times at the spot where the pencil had sat, not really believing I had moved something without touching it. It was like having a superpower, and a little rush of excitement fluttered through me. What else would I be able to do?

Aunt Kay slid the open book in front of me. "There were no words for how this spell was to work, and I think that's because they knew that words wouldn't be the right kind of magic. I want you to study this page and read the rest of the entries in this journal. Most of them never made sense to me, but maybe you'll get something from them."

I stared down at the picture of the net dividing the two realms. What was I going to gain from this? Could I just stand in front of it and will it to open the way I had moved the pencil?

Aunt Kay stood. "I'll get you something to eat. You have a few hours of reading ahead of you."

"Wait," I called after her, instantly regretting what I wanted to ask. She wouldn't be happy to hear me asking for an update on Brenon. "Never mind."

She pressed her lips into a thin line, looking like an annoyed mother for a moment before relaxing her expression. "I'll send him up when he returns."

"Thanks." I avoided eye contact, not wanting to see any more of her disapproval. We seemed to be bonding, and part of me wanted to have that connection with her. As I turned my attention back to the book, I heard her walking down the stairs.

Normally, I would have jumped at the chance to read historical journals from long-lost relatives. But the expectation of what I was going to have to do with the limited information I had weighed heavily on me.

I stared at the picture, then flipped the book back to the first page. It was covered in drawings of roses. My heart raced as I traced my fingers over the drawings. I flipped the page. More roses. The next several pages were all sketches of roses. Some up close, some in full bloom, some while they were on their last day, most of the petals fallen, others as delicate buds.

The drawings took me back to the first night at the Rose Circus, then to the petals covering my bedroom floor. My mind whirred to flashes of the canvas tent at the Fire Festival, and to the first time I'd met Terra. She'd given me a rose the same way Brenon had in the dressing room. At the time, I didn't know the connection, it was later that I found out they were siblings. Why did this journal have pages of roses? What was it about that flower?

As I continued to flip through the pages, I found the flower hidden in corners or doodled along the edges on most of the pages of the book.

I picked up another book and started at the beginning. This one also had sketches of roses at the front but didn't have them throughout. After trying a few more of the old books, I found that most of them had drawings of roses somewhere inside them.

Aunt Kay set a sandwich down in front of me. "Doing alright so far?"

"Yeah, but what's with the roses?" I asked, holding open one of the journals to show her a page of drawings.

"Creating a rose is the first right of passage for a Sayge. We usually learn how to work with plants first. Roses are complex as far as flowers go, so once you can demonstrate mastery of that, you are ready to learn real magic."

"I saw both Brenon and Terra make roses," I said.

"It's an old tradition that held by many of the magical beings on either side of the gate. Many of the Fae learned how to make a rose at first, too. It used to act as an unofficial symbol for those who had magic, and those who did not. Gaining your rose was a big deal for a Sayge child. Like losing your first tooth or learning how to ride a bike."

"Can you teach me?" Suddenly, the only thing I wanted to do was to be able to make a flower like Brenon had made for me. If it was a foundational skill, it seemed silly that it was something I couldn't do.

Aunt Kay crossed to the bookshelf and removed a small book then set it in front of me. She settled in the chair next to me, then opened the book.

On the page she'd turned to was a drawing of a rose, and a what looked at first glance like a poem. "Is this a spell?"

"This is the most common rose spell. Why don't you give the words a try?" Aunt Kay smiled as she held the pages open for me.

I swallowed down a lump in my throat. So many people were counting on me being able to do magic that I had never tried before. What if I failed doing the most basic spell? "What if it doesn't work?"

"Then you try it your way," she said, and you create it in your mind.

I nodded. It was worth a try. "I just read the words?"

"That's how most of us learn." She took hold of my hands and turned them, so my palms were facing up. "Try."

Leaving my palms open, as if holding something, I looked down at the book again and read the words aloud.

My hands were still empty, and my shoulders slumped. Then, I remembered what Aunt Kay had said about doing things my way. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. This time, I skipped the words, instead picturing one of Brenon's orange roses. The delicate scent of roses filled my nostrils as I recalled the softness of the petals against my fingertips. I imagined one of those flowers showing up in my hands the way that the petals had appeared in my room. I could practically feel the weight of the bloom. I froze and moved my fingers. There was something in my hand.

Opening my eyes, I looked down and took a sharp breath in as joy spread through me. I'd done it. I handed the flower to my aunt, unable to keep the smile from filling my whole face. I felt like a child who had just learned to ride a bike for the first time.

Clapping sounded from behind me and I turned to see Brenon standing in the doorway with Gia. My heart leaped at the sight of him.

"I knew you had it in you," he said.

Aunt Kay held up the flower for him to see. "She made an orange one. Wonder where that idea came from."