CHAPTER SIXTEEN
CADE TOOK BESS to the rodeo, and she sat in the stands and watched him bronc riding and calf roping with her heart in her throat. He looked so at home on a horse, so lean and powerful, that she could see other women eyeing him covetously. She smiled, because he was hers. He’d given nothing to any other woman for three years. That proved he was capable of fidelity. Even if he didn’t love her, he wanted her enough to remain true to her. That spoke volumes about his character.
The bronc riding was the event she feared most. He’d come through the calf roping with ease and grace, but bronc riding was tricky. If he drew a really bad horse, or if something diverted his attention, he could be thrown and trampled. One competitor early on had suffered that indignity and had to be half dragged, half carried out of the arena with his hand clutching his ribs. Bess sat on the edge of her seat, praying every inch of the way.
Cade came out of the chute with his hand high, his spurred boots raking neatly from neck to flank on the opening jump and keeping the rhythm clean and neat as the seconds ticked away. The commentator was saying something about the skill it took to drag those spurs that distance while staying in the saddle and commending the way Cade was getting the last ounce of bucking out of that bronc. Before his voice died away, the buzzer sounded and Cade was looking for a way off the furious horse. He threw one leg over and jumped, landing with precision on both boots, but the bronc wheeled and snorted, bucking right toward him. Cade timed it perfectly while Bess sat shivering with fear. He waited until the horse was almost on him, then he dashed past it and leaped onto the corral, quickly easing over the fence and out of harm’s way. There was a lot of laughter from the other competitors, and he was patted on the back while everyone waited for his time. They called it out, and the crowd went wild. He had the best score of the day. There were only two other competitors after him, both of whom were thrown before the first two seconds of their rides. Cade took top money and got a second place in calf roping. Bess sat in the stands beaming with pride, and when the awards were given out, she stood in the shelter of Cade’s arm with her whole heart in her face as she looked up at him.
That night she lay in his arms on the sofa, curling close, and listened to him talk about the competition. He was still winding down from the physical exertion of it, even though he’d borrowed her bathroom to have a long, hot shower. He was stiff and sore, and Bess had rubbed his broad shoulders and back with alcohol, trying to ignore his sensual innuendos when her hands stopped at the waistband of his jeans.
“We’ll live at Lariat,” he said, looking down at her quietly.
“Yes, I know.”
“I guess it will take a lot of adjusting for you,” he said, leaning back to smoke his cigarette. “There aren’t many frivolities, and the plumbing leaves a lot to be desired.”
She felt chills down her spine. She didn’t know what else to say to convince him that his lack of wealth didn’t matter to her. It never had. She loved him. “Cade, I’ll be happy at Lariat,” she said. “I hope I can make you happy, too.”
He sighed and bent to kiss her gently. “Well, we’ll see how it works out,” he said noncommittally. He glanced at his watch. “I’ve got to get back to the hotel. I’ll be over early if you’ll fix breakfast.”
She got up, hesitating. “You...you don’t want to stay?” she asked, looking so shyly curious that he smiled involuntarily.
He pulled her hands to his broad, bare chest, smoothing them over the thick hair on it. “Yes, I want to stay, sore muscles and all,” he replied. “But I’m not going to. We’re going to do it by the book. One lapse was enough, and I don’t want people looking at you the way your next-door neighbor did this morning because of me.” That had disturbed him, more than he wanted to admit. He didn’t want people thinking Bess was easy.
“You mean Señora Lopez?” She smiled gently. “She’s a very nice, very religious lady who doesn’t approve of the modern world.”
“Neither do I,” he replied. He touched her mouth. “I feel bad about the way things have gone with you and me, Bess,” he said worriedly. “I hate having so little control that I can’t wait until our wedding night. I can’t undo what happened, but I can prevent it from happening again until we’re married.”
She linked her arms around his neck with a tiny sigh. “I feel the same way, really. But I...” She lowered her face. “I’m a little afraid. Getting married is a big step.” She looked up quickly. “I want to marry you very much. I just hope I can be what you want me to be.” As she finished, she saw the lines of stress vanish from his face.
“You will be.” He bent and kissed her warmly. “See you at breakfast.”
“Okay. Good night.” She let him out and watched him go with sad eyes. Thursday, she thought dreamily, she’d never have to watch him leave again.
He was at the apartment early the next morning, just as she’d dressed and was starting breakfast. It was as if they’d never been apart, she thought, watching him finish the last of his bacon. But there was an exquisite newness about their relationship that made her glow. Just to look at him fed her heart. What they were sharing now was precious. Holding hands, looking at each other openly, caring. She felt as if she’d found the end of the rainbow, and it was Cade. All the long, lonely years were gone and forgotten as if they’d never been. She hated sleeping because it took her away from Cade. He was her whole life so suddenly, and apparently was enjoying it as much as she was. That was what was so beautiful, so incredible, that he expressed his feelings every time he looked at her or kissed her. If it was only desire, it was a tender kind of desire that put her first. She wondered if Cade realized how possessive he’d become.
He glanced up and saw that thoughtful stare. “What are you thinking?” he asked with a smile.
It was amazing how comfortable she was with him now, she mused, remembering a time when she was strung up and shivering every time he came near. Now he was like a part of her. “I was thinking how sweet it is to have breakfast with you,” she confessed.
“I was thinking the same thing.” He searched her eyes. “I feel married to you. I have for a long time. The wedding ring, the ceremony, they’re necessary and I want them. But for three years there’s been no time when I wanted anyone else.”
She smiled. “I’m glad, because I felt the same way.” She touched the back of his hand lightly. “Are you better today?”
“Still stiff,” he murmured ruefully, “but with plenty to show for it, thank God.”
“I wish you’d give it up,” she said.
“I will, when the time comes. Don’t nag.”
She glowered at him. “I love you.”
He grinned. “Yes, I know that. But I’m not going to throw myself under a horse’s hooves to let you prove it. How about that company picnic? Still want to go?”
“Yes. I’ve got to fix some potato salad and ham. I’ll get started. Do you want to get the Sunday paper? It’ll be just outside the door.”
He got up with a sigh. “I guess your reputation’s ruined by now,” he said quietly. “I should have realized what your neighbors would think when they saw us coming out of your apartment together at daylight.”
His concern for her reputation touched her. That was like him, that Old World courtesy and concern about honor. She turned, her eyes brimming with love. “I’ll put a note on the door and invite the whole floor to the wedding,” she said. “It’s all right. Maybe Señora Lopez is still asleep,” she added hopefully, knowing all the while that the señora, who had become a good friend, got up early every Sunday morning and went to Mass.
Cade hesitated at her expression. “Are you sure you want to risk having her see me again at this hour of the morning?” he asked quietly.
She smiled. “Yes, I’m sure.”
He paused, then he nodded and went outside to get the paper, where he ran headlong into the small Mexican-American woman, Señora Lopez, who lived next door. He grinned at her hugely.
“Good morning. Buenos días,” he tried again.
She glowered at him, looking indignant.
“I only just got here,” he persisted. “I came for breakfast yesterday and again this morning.” He glowered. “Nothing’s going on.”
The elderly lady stared without saying a word.
Cade felt needles sticking in him at that wordless disapproval. “Oh, God,” he groaned. “Bess! Help!” he called.
The neighbor looked perplexed when she saw his expression and heard Bess’s helpless laughter. Bess came running. “What’s wrong?” she asked. “Oh, good morning, señora,” she flustered, turning scarlet.
“So much for your blasé attitude.” Cade told Bess with a curt nod. “Serves you right. Come here.” He pulled her close and held up her left hand to show it to the señora. “We’re engaged. I don’t have a loose moral attitude, no matter how it may look. Bess isn’t a modern woman any more than I’m a modern man. I even go to church most Sundays.”
“Ah.” Señora Lopez relaxed, glad to have her dark suspicions disproved. “You are to be married, sí?”
“Sí,” Cade returned with a smile. “This Thursday. On the Paseo del Rio. You’re invited. And nothing’s going on,” he repeated firmly.
The señora beamed. She hadn’t really thought her sweet young neighbor was modern enough to have men staying with her in any casual way. And the señor, very proper and dignified when he defended Bess’s reputation. She liked him. With the wedding so soon, it was understandable that the young couple would have much to discuss and would want to be together as early and as late as possible. Yes, there was love in Bess’s eyes. And something dark and soft in the señor’s. She nodded. “¡Ay de mí, it will be a privilege to attend such a wedding!” She clasped her hands. “Señorita, you have a wedding dress?”
Bess caught her breath. “No! I’ll have to buy one.”
“You will not! I have just the thing. Come.”
The señora led them into her apartment. She gestured for them to wait while she went into her bedroom and came back after a minute with the most exquisite lace-trimmed white dress Bess had ever seen in her life, complete with glorious trailing mantilla.
“It was to have been my daughter’s wedding gown. You remember, señorita, I told you about her,” she prompted Bess, who remembered the poor tormented woman crying over her daughter’s death. Bess and the long-widowed señora would sit outside in the evenings and had come to be friends. They talked, and Señora Lopez seemed to find Bess’s company comforting. Although she never imposed, she was always bringing Bess cuttings of her profuse stock of flowers or cooking sweets for her to “fatten her up.”
“But, I can’t...!” Bess protested, even as her hands trailed lovingly over the gown that was obviously just her size.
“It will honor me if you will take it,” Señora Lopez said gently. “Estrella would have liked you. I am sure that she would not mind that I give it to you. It should be worn, Bessita,” she said, using the fond nickname she called Bess. “Please? ¿Por favor?”
“All right. And thank you,” Bess said fervently. “But only if you come to the wedding.”
“Of course I will come. I must make sure that your oh-so-handsome caballero does not desert you at the altar,” she said with a smile in Cade’s direction.
“It would take an army to keep me away from the altar.” Cade grinned, his eyes falling gently to meet Bess’s.
Señora Lopez assessed their exchanged look and smiled, nodding to herself. Yes, this was going to be a good match. Bonita.
Bess carefully put the dress away, loving the way Cade had looked at her when she held it up for Señora Lopez to see.
She packed up the potato salad and ham she was going to take to the company picnic, and she and Cade set off in jeans and matching chambray shirts with red bandannas at their necks, a perfect match except that Cade was wearing a Stetson and she wasn’t.
The first sight they got was of the nervous Nell, sitting on a rock by herself while people all around her were talking and having a good time. Bess put her dishes on the table and uncovered them, settling back against Cade as Jordan Ryker stood up at the head of the table and called for silence.
Cade watched him, narrow-eyed, as the older man welcomed the employees, welcomed Bess back after her accident and invited the company workers to dig in and have a good time.
Afterward he came up to Bess and grinned as he shook her hand. “You look refreshed and very pretty.” He glanced at Cade and chuckled. “I hear I’m persona non grata in your book, Hollister,” he added bluntly. “Let me assure you that the only designs I have on Bess are work related. She’s been a welcome addition to our ad agency staff. Julie thinks she’s tops.”
“So do I,” Cade said quietly, pulling her close to his side. “The wedding’s Thursday,” he added.
“Congratulations!” Ryker shook Cade’s hand and then Bess’s. “Nice to see that someone got lucky.” He sighed, trying to understand Cade’s dark stare.
“Speaking of someone,” Bess said. “If you won’t think I’m meddling, there’s a very nice girl here who worships the ground you walk on. If she wasn’t too shy to drop a handkerchief at your feet, you might find that she isn’t what she appears at all.”
He frowned, and his dark eyes scanned the gathering. “Not Julie, surely?” His eyebrows arched and he smiled amusedly.
“Julie is happily married,” she pointed out. “I’m talking about Nell.”
* * *
RYKER STUCK HIS hands deep inside his pockets, and his dark eyes settled firmly on Nell. “Well, I’ll be damned,” he said absently. “And here I thought...all this time.”
“She has a picture of you in her desk,” Bess said, shocking him into staring at her. “And the first thing she did when I walked into the office was tell me you were definitely off-limits, because someday she was going to get you if it killed her.”
He smiled. He chuckled. He burst out laughing. “God, men are blind,” he said under his breath. “Bess, you can have anything you want short of the agency for a wedding present. Now if you’ll excuse me, I think I hear my name being cursed silently.”
He strode off toward Nell, while Bess clung to Cade’s hand and grinned with pure delight.
Nell looked up, and even at a distance Bess could see her face coloring. Ryker sat down slowly beside her, obviously having a hard time trying to make conversation. Nell looked equally flustered. But somehow Bess knew that it was going to work out.
“Cupid Samson,” Cade whispered in her ear. “Nice going.”
“I had no idea he was dying for the love of Nell,” she whispered back. “Isn’t it romantic?!”
He pulled her close and searched her eyes. “I know something more romantic. Being married to you on Thursday.”
She sighed and nuzzled against him. He bent his head over hers and sighed. How amazing, she thought. For years he’d pushed her away at every opportunity, and now he couldn’t seem to stay close enough. He was always holding her hand or keeping his arm around her, holding her as if he couldn’t bear to lose contact. She felt that way, too, but it was new to find Cade staring at her with his desire plain in his eyes. He’d given her the impression that he hadn’t liked her for years. But it was understandable, since she understood now how desperately he had wanted her. That pretended dislike had been his only defense. But he didn’t need it anymore, and the sudden transition from enemy to lover sometimes made Bess’s mind whirl. The closeness they were sharing was like nothing she’d dreamed of. Being away from Cade even overnight was excruciating now. She was counting the hours until they could be together all the time.
If only it would last, she thought as they moved to the long banquet table to fill their plates. It had to last!
Cade was hoping the same thing. At least now maybe he could stop worrying about Ryker. Nice to know that the other man was carrying a torch for someone besides Bess. He’d worried, because Ryker was successful and rich, and Gussie had built the man into a real threat. Sometimes he still felt keenly the differences between his way of life and Bess’s, and in the back of his mind it bothered him that he might not be able to give her everything she wanted.
A tug on his jeans drew his attention, and looking down he came eye to eye with a small, dark, laughing boy holding out a cookie.
“For me?” Cade asked, smiling. He knelt by the child, his eyes warm and soft. He was always that way with children, Bess recalled, watching him with a kind of pain that ate at her. He had an instant rapport with the child, who put his arms around Cade’s neck and allowed himself to be carried back to his searching parents without a hint of reluctance. Children gravitated toward Cade wherever he went. It used to fascinate Bess that even when he was his taciturn self, the children of his ranch workers hung around near him. They seemed to know that underneath that facade was a sensitive, loving man. Bess was only now finding out what kind of warmth his mask hid. But it hurt her terribly to see how much he loved children. She turned away and went back to the table to get some more food, which she didn’t even taste, just to put the situation to the back of her mind.
She didn’t see Nell and Mr. Ryker when she and Cade left to go back to the apartment. She hoped things would go as well for them as they had for Cade and herself.
“Tomorrow morning we get the ball rolling,” he mused as they were watching television after supper. “Three more days, and you’re mine forever.”
“I’m yours forever right now, Mr. Hollister,” she said, lifting her soft lips to his.
“Come here.” He pulled her across his lap and held her, kissing her lightly from time to time, but nothing more intimate.
“He was cute, wasn’t he? That little boy,” he sighed. His fingers touched her breasts lightly over the fabric, and his eyes narrowed. “Are you going to nurse our children?” he asked suddenly.
She felt sick. “If we have children,” she agreed.
He frowned. “I thought you weren’t sure, about being pregnant.”
She swallowed and prayed silently for forgiveness. “I’m not,” she said, burying her face in his warm throat. “Not sure, I mean.”
“Well, there’s plenty of time,” he murmured. But he didn’t mean it. He wanted a child with Bess. Now was the time, while they were both young enough to cope. Too, a child would cement their relationship, a child born of her love for him and his deep, hungry affection for her. It might make all the difference. His arm contracted. “Plenty of time,” he repeated.
But was there? Bess wondered miserably. She felt his lips on her forehead, but he didn’t try to kiss her deeply again. He left early that night to go back to his hotel room, and he seemed preoccupied. Bess hoped that he hadn’t intuitively picked up anything from her. She knew she’d frozen when he mentioned the little boy, and he seemed vaguely disturbed by her attitude. She did want children so badly, but how could she tell him the truth without losing him? It was selfish, she told herself, horribly selfish to put her happiness before his. But she was so much in love that she couldn’t force herself to say a word.
Love had a lot to answer for in her life, she thought miserably. She’d given in to Cade once before they were married, something she’d sworn to herself that she could never do. She hadn’t counted on how heady it was to indulge in all those fantasies she’d had about him. She hadn’t been able to draw back any more than he had. Well, at least he hadn’t been stringing her along just to get her into bed, she thought ruefully. He was an honorable man, and she knew instinctively that he’d never have let it go so far if he hadn’t meant to marry her. She frowned, wondering at his continued persistence about children. Had he seduced her with the idea of getting her pregnant, to coax her into marriage? Or was it just his usual hunger for a child that he felt safe to indulge now? She remembered the way he’d been with that little boy and she felt uneasy. She was going to be cheating him when they married.
She only prayed that her love for him would be enough to make their marriage work.
They hadn’t called Lariat to tell Elise and the boys about their wedding plans, and Bess hadn’t called Gussie. They were going to wait until they got the license and phone everyone Tuesday night.
Bess did have regrets about not having a conventional wedding night, but Cade had suffered three years of abstinence and she couldn’t blame him for wanting to go ahead and get married now. She felt the same way herself. The excitement kept her going as she tried to imagine what it was going to be like as Cade’s wife.
* * *
MONDAY MORNING NELL was quiet and introspective, hardly communicative. Julie and Bess couldn’t worm a word out of her about what had happened at the company picnic. She flushed and found excuses to go to other parts of the building every time it was mentioned.
Bess finally hemmed her up just before lunch, locking the door to her own office and staring the older woman down.
“I can’t stand it anymore. I have got to know what happened!” Bess exclaimed.
Nell blushed to the roots of her hair. “Nothing,” she muttered, her lower lip trembling and tears in her huge blue eyes. “He asked me how I was, then he mentioned that the weather sure looked fine. He looked at a bird, he lit a cigar and put it out and then he invited me to go for a walk with him.”
Bess was all eyes. “And...?”
Nell rested her chin in her hands on the desk, looking bewildered and unsettled. “He...sort of kissed me.”
“Sort of?”
Nell lifted her head. “Well, it was hard to tell,” she muttered. “He aimed and missed and then I tripped over his feet and...” She covered her face with her hands.
“And...?”
“Knocked him into the river,” she groaned. “I was too ashamed to stay and face the music. He climbed out all dripping, and I just panicked and ran. I know he’ll never speak to me again. I was so embarrassed! All those years of hoping he’d say something to me, and he finally does and I try to drown him!”
Bess got up and hugged her. “Hasn’t it occurred to you that he doesn’t know much about women?” she asked gently. “That he’s awkward and maybe a little ungraceful because he’s feeling this way? He told me the night Mother and I had dinner with the Rykers that he’s not much of a ladies’ man.”
“And I knocked him into the river!” Nell was shaking. “Oh, what will I do?” She sat down heavily, her face in her hands. “I never dreamed...!”
“So I see. May I make a suggestion? Stop worrying and let things take care of themselves. Believe me—” she grinned “—if Mr. Ryker feels the way you do, a little thing like near-drowning isn’t even going to slow him down. Just take into consideration that he’s as backward as you are with the opposite sex and don’t expect a playboy.”
“What a morning,” Nell whispered huskily. “I hope I last through the afternoon.”
“Me, too. Cade is out getting a marriage license.” She grinned. “I can hardly wait until Thursday. You and Julie have to come.” She pursed her lips. “And Mr. Ryker. I can’t not invite him.”
Nell colored prettily. “That would be...nice.”
“Just what I thought. Please, for heaven’s sake, don’t get him between you and the water this time,” she pleaded.
Nell’s face burned bright, but she laughed. “If I get another chance, you’d better believe I won’t mess it up. He liked me.” She went out, shaking her head. “He really liked me. He thought I was engag—oof!”
She walked right into Cade, who caught her before she fell.
“Thank God there aren’t any bodies of water in here,” she said absently, giving him a pleasantly blank look as she went out.
Cade opened his mouth to question Bess, but she just shook her head. “Never mind,” she told him. “It’s better not to ask. Did you apply for the license?”
“I did,” he murmured smugly. “Now we get blood tests. I’ve found a place that can do them in twenty-four hours. Let’s go.”
“All right!” She grabbed her purse and his hand and followed him out. Everything, she thought, was falling into place gloriously!
They were married Thursday afternoon on the Paseo del Rio, on a boat, with a minister officiating and all the members of their respective families and friends gathered on the riverbank, along with some photographers and local reporters from the print and broadcast media. It was something of an event even for festive San Antonio, and Cade’s recent wins at the rodeo made him more newsworthy than ever.
Bess hadn’t considered that anyone might connect her with her father. But just as the ceremony began, one of the reporters barged through the crowd and asked her how it felt to be marrying the man her father had almost ruined financially with that crooked investment scheme.
Bess never got a chance to answer. While she stood there trembling in Señora Lopez’s beautiful white wedding gown, Cade’s big fist shot out, and the reporter went into the river.
Jordan Ryker caught Nell’s little hand in his and pulled her back protectively, smiling down at her. “At least it wasn’t me this time,” he murmured wryly, and looked delighted when she flushed and turned her face against his jacket.
“You snake in the grass.” Gussie came out of the crowd like a gray-suited avenging angel. The reporter tried to climb back out of the river, and she helped him right back in, to the amusement of the crowd. “This is a wedding, not a news event. You stay there until it’s over!”
The other reporters only grinned as the minister performed the ceremony. Cade slid the small white-gold band onto Bess’s third finger, next to the small silver engagement ring. His dark eyes met hers as the minister had them recite the rest of the wedding service, and then he bent to lift her mantilla and kiss her for the first time as her husband.
Tears rolled down Bess’s flushed cheeks. She looked up at him with her whole heart in her face.
“I love you,” she whispered so that only he could hear.
He didn’t return the words, but his eyes were very soft. He smiled at her, but before he could speak, even if he’d meant to, they were suddenly surrounded by well-wishers.
Bess had hoped that he might give the words back, if only for the sake of her pride. She didn’t know how Cade really felt about her. She knew that he wanted her and that he liked her. He’d said often enough in the past that love wasn’t a word he knew. But Bess was going to teach it to him, somehow.
Cade looked down at her with a new kind of possessiveness. His wife, he thought proudly. She looked happy, but the reporter had managed to put a blight on the ceremony. He wished he’d hit the man harder. It only emphasized the life she’d led before and what she was going to have to endure as his wife. He hoped that she could cope with the lack of luxuries at Lariat and get used to having his family around all the time. Now that they’d made it all legal, there were a lot of problems cropping up that he hadn’t foreseen. Now that he had her, he was wondering if her love was going to be strong enough to endure the hardships of his lifestyle. She couldn’t know that it had been a terrible strain on Lariat’s budget to have even this small wedding. The minister, the mariachis and the owner of the boat had to be paid. There had been the ring and the license—things she would have taken for granted. But Cade had lost plenty of money through that investment disaster. The rodeo money he’d won was a help, but it didn’t get them far out of debt. He sighed. Bess could never be told just how badly off they were. She’d offer those damned pearls again, and he couldn’t take them from her. He’d told her they should go to their children, and he meant it. He’d support her properly, somehow.
He remembered her voice at the end of the ceremony, whispering that she loved him. His chest swelled. Her love was part of his strength in some odd way. And he cared about her, too. She was pretty and smart and accomplished, and she had the breeding he lacked.
He knew it was going to take time to adjust to being married, for her as well as for him, but they’d make it. He sighed and drew her close while they endured the congratulations and the press of reporters. He’d keep her happy somehow, he thought doggedly. And when the children came along, he’d be more than content. A child would make up for everything. She might even now be carrying their son. A faint smile touched his hard mouth as he looked down at her. Yes. A son. His chest swelled. And he’d be twice the father his own had been. He’d give his child love and attention, and he’d never turn his back on him. His arm tightened around Bess. Bess would be a good mother, too, once she had this independent streak of hers cured by some warm loving. She was class all the way, a real lady. Her family lineage would give his children a social acceptability that he’d never had. It would open doors for them and give them pride in their heritage. She’d teach them the beautiful manners that she had, and the shame of poverty he’d always felt so keenly wouldn’t exist for them. They’d never have to apologize for being low-class and rough, he thought bitterly. Even if they didn’t have great wealth, they’d have respectability.
He looked down at her, smiling at his new wife. Miss Samson of Spanish House, he thought absently, and of all the men in Texas she could have had, she’d wanted him. That made him proud.
He lifted his chin. It would be a good marriage. He’d make her happy and she’d give him children. She’d help bring a new, better generation to Lariat, a more cultured and educated class of heirs. She’d come home and have babies and they’d live happily ever after. That settled, he reached out and hugged Robert and Gary and his mother. As an afterthought he even hugged Gussie. Life was looking up.