CHAPTER SIX
IT TOOK WEEKS for all the loose ends to be tied together, weeks during which Bess sometimes thought Gussie would drive her insane. She moped around the small apartment they’d taken in San Antonio, complaining about its size while she moaned about the loss of their fortune and grumbled about her late husband who was the cause of it all.
The sale of Spanish House was the final hurdle. A couple from Ohio bought it, and Bess breathed a sigh of relief when the papers were signed and the money advanced. Donald took over, paying out the last of the creditors. Gussie didn’t know that Bess had given him Great-aunt Dorie’s pearls, which were quietly sold to a jeweler for top dollar. She had to pay back Cade, so that he wouldn’t lose Lariat. Despite what he’d said about the legacy and heritage of those pearls, she’d rather lose them than let him lose his ranch.
The pearls were a small price to pay for the delight they were going to give Cade. But she made Donald promise not to tell him how she’d obtained the money. Let him think they realized a profit from the sale of the house and land, she told their attorney. She didn’t want to tell Gussie, but inevitably she noticed that the pearls were missing.
“Where are Great-aunt Dorie’s pearls?” she demanded petulantly. “They aren’t in your jewelry box.”
Bess was half angry that her mother should still be searching through her things after so many years. It was an old pattern that she’d always resented. “Why were you looking in my jewelry box?” Bess asked with faint indignation.
“Don’t be absurd,” Gussie said indifferently. “Where are they?”
Bess took a deep breath. No time like the present, she thought, to start as she meant to go on. “I sold them.”
“You said they were costume jewelry!”
“I lied,” Bess said with pretended calm. “We had debts to pay off...”
“The debts were already paid off. That man,” she began slowly, her temper rising. “You sold them to pay back Cade Hollister!”
Bess forced herself to breathe slowly. “I couldn’t let his family lose Lariat because of us,” she said.
“Damn his family and damn him!” Gussie burst out. “How dare you! How dare you sell an heirloom like those pearls!”
“It was a debt of honor,” Bess began. “Dad would have—”
“Your father was a weak fool,” Gussie said. “And so are you!”
Bess’s lower lip trembled. Tears stung her eyes. She wouldn’t cry, she wouldn’t...but the tears spilled over.
Gussie wasn’t moved. “I was going to buy a car with those pearls,” she said angrily, “and you gave them away!”
That stopped the tears. Bess wiped them angrily from her cheeks and glared at her mother. Sell the pearls to buy a car, when they could barely meet their rent, and the money from the sale of the house was all but gone. She glared at Gussie.
“Yes, I sold them,” she said, her voice shaking because it was the first time she’d ever spoken back. “And Cade will keep Lariat for his children. Children I’ll never have, thanks to you. No man is ever going to want me because of you!”
Gussie turned her head warily, watching Bess as if she thought the younger woman had a fever. “That’s enough, Bess.”
“No, it isn’t!” Bess’s voice broke. “I can’t take care of myself and you. Dad always looked after us, but I’m not Daddy. I’m not strong. I can’t cope with a job and bills and you!”
Gussie looked mortally wounded. “That my own child should speak to me like this,” she said huskily. “After all I’ve done for you.”
Bess’s lips were trembling so hard that she could barely get words out. “You’re making this so difficult,” she whispered.
“I suppose I could always go on welfare.” Gussie sniffed, reaching for a handkerchief. “And live in the streets, since my own child doesn’t want me.” She began to cry pitifully.
Bess knew it was an act. She knew that she should be strong, but she couldn’t bear to hear Gussie cry. “Oh, Mama, don’t,” she moaned, going to Gussie, to hold her. “It’s all right. We’ll be fine, really we will.”
“We could have had a nice car,” Gussie sniffed.
“We couldn’t have afforded gas and oil for it though,” Bess murmured, trying to make a joke. “And somebody would have had to wash it.”
Gussie actually laughed. “Well, it wouldn’t have been me, you know; I can’t wash a car.” She hugged Bess back. “I know it’s hard for you, but darling, imagine how it is for me. We were rich and now we have so little, and it’s difficult.”
“I know,” Bess said gently. “But we’ll get by.”
“Will we?” Gussie sat up, rubbing her red eyes. “I do hope so.” She sighed shakily. “Bess, you really will have to see about getting a job soon.”
Bess started to argue, but Gussie was right. Her mother wasn’t suited to any kind of work, and the most pressing problem was how they were going to live. After all the debts were paid, Bess and Gussie were left with little more than six hundred dollars and some of Gussie’s jewelry.
“I’ll start looking first thing in the morning,” Bess said quietly.
“Good girl.” Gussie got up. “Oh, damn the Hollisters,” she muttered, glancing irritably at Bess. “I’ll never forgive Cade for letting you pay off that debt in full. He could have refused the money, knowing how bad off we are.”
Bess colored. “Mother, he’s got debts of his own and Dad’s investment scheme almost cost him Lariat. You know how he feels about heritage, about children.”
“I don’t want to talk about him. And don’t you get any more ideas about that man. I won’t let you get involved with him, Bess. He’s the last man on earth for you. He’d break your spirit as easily as he breaks horses. I absolutely forbid you to see him, do you understand?”
“I’m twenty-three years old, Mother,” Bess said uneasily. “I won’t let you arrange my life.”
“Don’t be silly,” Gussie laughed pleasantly. “You’re a lovely girl and there are plenty of rich men around. In fact,” she began thoughtfully, “I know of a family right here in San Antonio with two eligible sons...”
Cade had been right. Bess stared at her mother in astonishment. “You aren’t serious!” she burst out.
“It doesn’t hurt to have contacts,” Gussie was saying. “I’ll phone them tonight and see if I can wrangle an invitation for us.”
“I won’t go,” Bess said doggedly.
“Don’t be silly. Of course you’ll go. Thank God we still have some decent gowns left.” Gussie waltzed out of the room, deep in thought and deaf to Bess’s protests.
Bess didn’t sleep. Gussie had upset her to the point of depression, and she was only beginning to realize what a difficult life it was going to be. Shackled with her flighty mother, there would never be any opportunity to see Cade again unless she fought tooth and nail. Not that Cade would try to see her. He was right in a way: there could never be a future for them with Gussie’s interference. But it broke her heart.
At least Cade could keep Lariat now, she thought sadly. She’d done that for him, if nothing else.
The next morning she went out early to start looking for a job. She put her application in at two ad agencies and one magazine office, but her lack of experience was a strike against her and her typing skills were almost nonexistent. She and Gussie didn’t have a typewriter for her to practice on and she couldn’t afford to buy one. Perhaps she could rent one, she thought, and practice at night.
When she got back to the apartment at lunchtime, Gussie was in bright spirits. “We’ve got an invitation to dinner with the Rykers tonight,” she said gaily. “They’re sending a car for us at six. Do wear something sexy, darling. Jordan is going to be there. Daniel couldn’t manage, he’s in New York for a business meeting. Anna said she’d be delighted to see us both. You don’t know her, of course, but she and I were at school together.”
“Who is Jordan?” Bess asked warily.
“Jordan Ryker. Anna’s eldest son. He’s president of the Ryker Corporation. They make computers and that sort of thing. You’ll like him, he’s very handsome.”
“I will not be railroaded into a blind date.” Bess put her foot down.
“Don’t start being difficult. We can’t afford pride.”
“I can,” Bess said shortly. “I won’t go.”
“You most certainly will.” Gussie turned and glared at her. “After what you did with our pearls, you owe me one little favor.” She saw that belligerence wasn’t going to work, so she changed tactics. “Now, darling, you’ll enjoy yourself. I’m not trying to throw you at Jordan. It isn’t even a date. We’re just having dinner with old friends.”
It couldn’t be that simple, not with Gussie. Bess sighed wearily, knowing she was going to give in. She didn’t have the heart to fight anymore. She’d lost Cade, and he was the only thing in life she might have cared enough to fight for.
“All right, Mama,” she said. “I’ll go.”
“Lovely!” She held up a bracelet. “Isn’t this adorable? I bought it today.”
“What did you pay for that?” Bess asked, aghast at the gold bracelet.
“Just a few hundred—”
“Give it here.” Before Gussie realized what was happening, Bess had taken the bracelet off. “It goes back. We can’t afford things like this anymore.”
“But it’s all right,” Gussie wailed. “I charged it!”
“Charges have to be paid. Now where did you get it?”
Gussie told her, flushing when Bess started getting ready to take it back.
“I can’t possibly live like this,” Gussie wailed. “I must have a new winter coat, Bess, and my shoes are worn-out...”
“You have a new mink that Dad bought you last Christmas,” Bess returned coolly, “and at least thirty pairs of shoes, all leather, none of which have been worn more than twice.”
“They’re out of style, and I won’t be treated like this!”
“If you want to spend more money than we can afford, you could get a job,” Bess offered.
Her mother looked horrified. “But what could I do?”
“Babysit little children. Be a receptionist. Wash dishes in a restaurant. Be a bartender.”
Gussie’s face paled. “You mean, work for the public? Oh, no, I couldn’t do that,” she gasped. “Suppose some of our friends saw me?”
“This is San Antonio,” her daughter replied. “It won’t shock anybody.”
“I won’t do it,” Gussie said haughtily, and marched out of the room. “Besides, we still have our credit cards,” she added, as if that magically alleviated all debt.
Bess couldn’t help but laugh. Her mother was such a sweet, incorrigible idiot.
Bess felt old these days. She’d had her long hair trimmed, so it curved thick and shiny down her back, dropping in soft honey-colored waves over her shoulders. She looked sophisticated, more mature. She’d need to look older if she was going to get a job.
She’d cried about leaving the home where she’d grown up, the neighbors—Cade. Well, Cade was a part of the past already, she thought miserably. He hadn’t called or written or been to see them since they’d moved to San Antonio, and the one letter she’d written to him had been returned to her unopened. It hadn’t been a mistake either, because Cade’s handwriting was bold and Bess had recognized it. She felt cold and miserable about that and finally decided that what he’d said to her that last day had been out of pity. He knew how she felt about him and he’d felt sorry for her. He’d been giving her a treat, a sweet send-off. That was the only explanation she could find for the ring he’d given her and the things he’d hinted at. Her heart felt like lead in her chest as the days went by. She’d gone almost out of her mind at first, but slowly she was getting used to the idea that he just didn’t want her. Physically, perhaps, she thought, even though he’d never kissed her. But wanting wouldn’t be enough eventually. Maybe it was just as well that he was keeping his distance. Someday she might be able to cope with losing him. For now she had other problems. She got up wearily and went to the store to return the bracelet.
* * *
BESS HAD PUT her long hair into a plaited bun and was just putting the final touches on her makeup when the doorbell rang. She listened, but at first she didn’t hear the voices. Then as she put on her earrings, the ones that went with her sea-green strapless chiffon dress, the voices got louder and she suddenly recognized Cade’s!
She ran out of her room, pausing just in time to hear her mother’s triumphant voice telling him about their dinner invitation.
“She likes Jordan,” Gussie was adding, “and the Rykers are a founding family of San Antonio. We’re being well cared for—”
“Mother!” Bess gasped.
Gussie glared at her. “I was telling Cade about our invitation,” she said innocently. “Don’t talk long, darling. Jordan’s chauffeur will be here to pick us up soon.” She whirled out of the room, elegant in black silk, leaving Bess to face a coldly furious Cade. God only knew what Gussie had told him, because he looked murderous.
He was wearing a becoming dark charcoal-gray suit, that suited him. His equally dark eyes narrowed as he looked her over.
She took a slow breath, her heart going wild just at the sight of him. “Would you like to come in?” she asked hesitantly.
He lifted a careless eyebrow. “No. I don’t think so. I came here to ask a question, but I don’t think it’s necessary anymore.” His eyes went over her expensive dress and he smiled mockingly. “You don’t seem much the worse for wear after paying me back, Bess, and you look all grown-up.”
“What did you want to ask me?” she murmured, letting her eyes wander slowly over his tanned face.
“I wanted to know where you got the money to give me.”
“Oh.” She breathed heavily. “I sent you a letter explaining it, but you sent it back unopened.”
“I thought it might be a love letter,” he said insolently.
She flushed. Her chin tilted. First Gussie, now Cade. It didn’t seem possible that she could have so much antagonism in her life all at once. “Well, it wasn’t. It was to explain what I sold to raise the money. I didn’t want you to lose Lariat.”
She meant the pearls, but he didn’t know that. He was thinking about another rare commodity. His face hardened.
“You little fool!” he bit off. His hands caught her bare shoulders, gripping with such force that she was sure he’d bruised her as he pulled her out into the hall with him. The look in his eyes was frightening. Of all the things he’d expected, this was the last. The reason he’d come here today sat heavily on his chest. He was sick all over, thinking about Bess with some faceless man. Rage boiled up in him, choking him. He wanted to shake her senseless!
“Cade, what’s the matter?” she gasped, shaken by the fury in his dark eyes as much as by the rage in his deep voice.
“What did you do for that money, Bess?” he demanded.
She jerked away from him, really frightened now. “What are you talking about?” she asked. “I just wanted you to have Lariat...” she said, then broke off, astonished at his actions.
He couldn’t even answer her. His tongue felt tied in knots. He just looked at her, hating her. After a minute he took a slow breath and let it out just as slowly.
“I came to ask how you were doing,” he said finally. “But I can see that it was unnecessary. You’ve landed on your feet. Or, rather, on your back.”
His tone was bristling with contempt. “On my back?” she echoed blankly, her eyes searching his for answers she couldn’t find. He looked so strange. “Cade, are you all right?” she asked gently. “What’s wrong?”
“She’s already sold you to some damned rich man!” he accused.
Now she understood—not only what he was accusing her of but what he was so angry about. He was jealous! Her eyes widened as she gazed at his dark face and she had to force her feet not to dance a jig in the hall.
She understood all too well the anger he was feeling. His suit, while nice, was off a rack in some department store. His boots were expensive, but old and badly scuffed. Even his leather belt with its rodeo champion buckle was worn. He looked like a man at the bottom of the social ladder trying to make his way up, and Bess was wearing a designer gown that was only one season old and practically new. The differences between them were visible ones, and it struck her as odd that she’d never realized how proud Cade was, nor how reluctant he might be to make a pass at a rich woman. So many unanswered puzzle pieces fell into place when she understood all at once why he’d kept his distance for so long.
Her heart sang. She reached behind her and gently closed the apartment door. “Mama didn’t sell me to anyone, Cade,” she said quietly, her soft eyes smiling as they searched his furious ones.
“You’re on your way to him now,” he added, indicating her dress. His eyes lingered on her bare shoulders helplessly, with sudden hunger in his eyes.
“I’m on my way to dinner with some old friends of Mother’s,” she corrected. She touched his hand gently with hers, delighted at the way he tautened at the contact, at the unwilling curving of his hand into her touch. He looked down and saw the ring he’d given her, and all the hard lines went out of his face.
“You’re still wearing it,” he said quietly.
“Of course I am. You gave it to me. You’re very possessive,” she said, with gentle accusation, her heart racing as she felt the first stirrings of her femininity and realized its effect on him. He hadn’t wanted her three years ago, but perhaps time had changed him because he was looking at her now with open hunger.
“I suppose I am.” He sighed heavily. “And blind as a damned bat. I don’t know why I even assumed such a ridiculous thing. I know you’re the last woman on earth who’d give herself to a total stranger for money.”
The admission made her feel like flying. She smiled with all her heart. “I could have told you that, but I’m glad you decided it for yourself. What are you doing in San Antonio?”
“Selling off cattle mostly, but I had to find out how you got your hands on that money.” He smiled ruefully. “You sold the pearls, didn’t you?”
“Yes.”
“I told you not to.”
“Mama would have used them to buy a car. I decided that Lariat was a better investment,” she added, grinning. “Go ahead, throw them back in my face.”
His eyebrows rose. “In a way I did. I gave Donald back everything except for the fifty cents on the dollar I asked for and told him to send it to you with my blessing.”
She groaned. “Oh, no. Cade, you didn’t!”
“I did it out of pride at the time,” he admitted. “But the fact is, you need the money more than I do.”
“Money is the last thing I need!” she cried. “Cade, if my mother gets her hands on anything, she’ll spend it. I’m trying to make her see that we’re going to have to work to support ourselves.”
“Lots of luck,” he said. “Gussie won’t work. She’ll get you a job instead.”
She glared at him. “You might give me a chance.”
He touched her cheek with a long, lean forefinger. “Yes. I might. You look lovely. Very expensive.”
The feel of his finger made her knees weak. “You don’t look bad yourself,” she whispered huskily.
“Who is he, this man she’s pushing you toward?” he persisted. His forefinger moved to her mouth and began to trace its exquisite bow shape very lightly.
“His name is Ryker,” she said. “He owns a company of some sort. Cade, you’re driving me crazy!” she protested, almost gasping at the sensations he was causing with his lazy touch against her mouth.
“What do you think it’s doing to me?” he asked roughly. His eyes held hers until she felt the impact right to her toes. “The scent of you drowns me in gardenia blossoms, and that’s what your mouth looks like to me right now, pink gardenia, petal soft. I want it, Bess,” he breathed, letting his eyes fall to her mouth. “I want it so much I can hardly stand here and breathe without it.”
She wanted it just as much. “I want it, too, Cade,” she whispered. She did. The thought of his kisses had kept her alive for years. Every day the longing grew worse. She moved a whisper closer to him, her face uplifted, her pulse throbbing at the flash of hunger in his dark eyes.
His lean hands slid to her shoulders and traced them, savoring the softness of her bare skin, the warmth under his hands. Her body would be like that, he thought in anguish. Her breasts would be even softer, and he could make their tips hard and flushed if he touched them...
“My God, I’d give blood to touch you under that dress,” he whispered huskily. “I’d like to back you against the wall and crush you under me and kiss you until you moan out loud. But as sure as hell, Gussie’s got radar and she’d come hotfoot to break it up.”
Bess knew it was the truth, but she almost moaned out loud when he let go of her arms and moved away, leaving her trembling and weak.
“Besides all that, Bess,” he added heavily, “kissing is addictive. That’s why I didn’t start anything before you left Coleman Springs.”
He’d said something of the kind once before, but it was just as painful now as it had been then. She only knew that she’d die to kiss him, just once! “You might try it now, just to see,” she whispered, her eyes on his hard mouth. “If it’s addictive, I mean.”
He smiled ruefully. “I might stick a handful of matches in my pockets and walk through a brushfire, too. No way, honey. Go to your dinner party. I’ve got to get back to Lariat.”
“I might decide to try kissing Mr. Ryker,” she said threateningly, flirting with him for the first time in memory.
He read the mischief in her dancing eyes and actually smiled. “No, you won’t.”
“Why won’t I?” she challenged.
He moved toward her, bending so that his warm breath touched her lips when he spoke. “Because you want me too much,” he whispered. “You couldn’t let another man touch you if you tried. I should have remembered that when I got hot under the collar about that money.”
She stared into his dark eyes and couldn’t deny it. She couldn’t even breathe for the fever his nearness aroused in her. “Oh, Cade,” she moaned under her breath. “I ache so...!”
“That goes both ways,” he said curtly. He moved away from her with a harsh laugh. “I’ve got to get out of here. I’ll be in touch.”
“But the money...”
“Damn the money,” he said easily. His dark eyes searched her face hungrily. “And to answer your earlier question, yes, I’m possessive—about the things and people I consider my own. Have a good time tonight, but don’t let the proposed boyfriend touch you. I want to be the first.” His eyes fell to her bodice, and she stopped breathing.
Her heart ran wild. But before she could get the words out, he’d turned and walked away without a backward glance, as if he’d forgotten that she existed. She stood watching him light a cigarette as he stepped into the elevator and it closed behind him.
Bess went back into the apartment in a daze. If she lived to be a hundred, she’d never understand Cade Hollister.
“Well, what did he want?” Gussie demanded as she came back into the living room.
“To tell me that he gave the money back to Donald.”
Gussie brightened. “You mean we have money?”
“We did,” Bess said, feeling suddenly capable of anything. “I’m going to tell Donald to buy back Great-aunt Dorie’s pearls with what’s left, and we’ll put them away as a legacy.”
“We can have a car!” Gussie argued.
“No, we can’t,” Bess said firmly and waited for the explosion. Incredibly Gussie didn’t say another word. “We’ll do very well without a lot of things we thought we needed, you’ll see. Shouldn’t you get your wrap? The chauffeur will be here any minute.”
Gussie started to argue and then thought about Jordan Ryker and her plans to match him up with Bess. She couldn’t really afford to antagonize Bess just yet, and obviously Cade Hollister hadn’t made any headway, because Bess looked untouched and unruffled. She nodded and forced a smile.
“I’ll do that,” she told Bess.
Bess watched her go and then lifted her right hand to her lips and gently kissed the small silver ring Cade had given her. She could hardly believe what she’d heard him say, but now she had something to live for, something to fight for. Gussie wasn’t going to find her quite as easy to manipulate from now on. Cade considered her his own. Perhaps her new state of poverty had made him decide that she was fair game now, or perhaps it was only that he wanted her after all. Either way she had a chance with him for the first time and she wasn’t going to waste it.
She was going to be the independent, strong woman she knew she could be. She was already on the road to that independence, and she was awhirl with new feelings, new sensations. Cade was vulnerable, just a little, and that made her feel as if anything was possible. She could have danced on a cloud. Now all she had to do was escape the noose of her mother’s suffocating attention and make Gussie understand that the past was dead. Then she could get a job, work hard, and prove to herself and Cade that she was capable of being the woman he needed. She could learn to cook and be independent. She might even learn to ride a horse as expertly as his mother, so that she could help out during roundup. She laughed at the thought, but it wasn’t nearly as impossible now as it would have been when she was still Miss Samson of Spanish House. Oh, the wonder of being ordinary! If it hadn’t been for her father’s tragic death, she wouldn’t have minded losing everything. For the first time she felt a sense of purpose, and a sense of self-worth. She could be a person instead of her mother’s afterthought. That was a goal worth fighting for.