Chapter One

Gail

It was a never-ending cycle of normalcy. I woke up every day at the same time and found myself trudging through life with the other sheep. There was no challenging adventure on the horizon. The fire had been extinguished from my soul leaving me vacant and alone.

I woke up in the morning to reach out only to feel a cold and empty spot on the other side of the bed. I was tired of seeing loving couples walking hand in hand showing public displays of affection.

“Cheer up…it’s your birthday.” I spun my head around the office to see if anybody had overheard the words coming out of his mouth.

“Keep it down and nobody else knows. I would like to keep it that way.” Henry was a computer geek that worked in the cubicle near mine making him less likely to be a potential conquest in the bedroom.

“It’s not every day you turn 30. You should be screaming it from the rooftops for everyone to hear.” He sounded like the squawking reminder of my mother with her upbeat attitude and optimistic outlook on life.

“I don’t see anything to be happy about. My love life is a dismal disappointment. This job is sucking the life out of me one day at a time.” I looked around at the sterile white walls and felt like screaming at the lack of color and personality.

“You have to live for yourself and not for others. This is the perfect time for you to take stock of your life.” I did have to admit, for my age, I was in pretty good shape. My sessions after work with the private trainer had truly paid off.

“Do you know how annoying it is to hear you with a chipper tone in your voice? I have no idea why we are even friends.” Henry was my secret weapon against the opposite sex.

I was able to pick his brain. I learned those little things to make me aware of the fact a man was going to say anything and do anything to get into my pants. Henry was good at dispensing advice, but he wasn’t good at taking his own. He was always drawn to the bad boy with very little chance they were going to change their ways.

“Gail, I wake up every morning with a smile on my face. I thank God for everything I have. A friend like you is found once in a lifetime. I am envious of your progress and I should stop by more often to see your personal trainer.” My body was toned where it mattered. I had a shapely butt that only seemed to drive men even more wild.

My weight had fluctuated over the years, but I achieved 140 pounds, which was perfectly proportioned to my 5’6” frame. I had lightened my hair color and had it cut just above my shoulders. I always went through phases where I wanted to reinvent myself. It did make me feel better for a short while before the weight of the world came crashing down on my shoulders.

The dress I was wearing was an early birthday gift on my credit card. It made my excitement more than a little obvious. The material of the black and white dress shaped my body in all the right ways.

“I would gladly take a run at you if I wasn’t interested in something more masculine. I’m going to take you out tonight and paint the town red. The drinks are on me. Celebrate your birthday with me and I promise I won’t tell a soul.” It was emotional blackmail, but it wasn’t like I had a leg to stand on.

“For a private security company, this place is boring. It might be time to shake things up by getting wasted and taking home the first available piece of ass I find.” I talked a big game, but my follow-through wasn’t exactly strong.

“I will find you something gorgeous to sink your teeth into tonight. I will be your wingman. Who better than a gay man to find you someone worthy of your affection? Hum…oh that’s right, the hunk of a man that came from the army, um…what’s his name? Chase Adams.” Chase was a tall and imposing figure with a brooding demeanor to make him catnip to the ladies.

“We don’t even know much about him other than he came here right after his tour of duty with the Marines. He’s not very talkative, but when he does say something it means more.” He carried himself with distinction and there were moments I fantasized about how to alleviate him of his clothes.

“Rumor had it he was disgraced and thrown out of the Marines.” Others were more adamant about his heroic status and how he carried the burden of battle with him like a black cloud. He was out of my league, but my athletic reflection in the mirror said differently.

I was still dealing with insecurity hoping that my outlook would change when my body was sculpted into the ideal woman. I had been working on the exterior me, but underneath my lack of self-esteem was holding me prisoner. I was a little shy and being in his gravity made me blush two different shades of red.

“I would rather hear it from the horse’s mouth. He’s been with us for about a month, but he has only been in the office for a couple of days.” The injury he got working his first overseas assignment had made it necessary to get physiotherapy on the company’s dime. “I would’ve been happy to be his angel of mercy with a bedside manner to put a smile on his face.”

I saw him limping toward me and he gave me a smile to melt the panties right off of my body. He probably didn’t even notice I was alive, but I couldn’t say the same. He was in obvious discomfort, but he was refraining from using the crutches. It was his macho male pride getting in the way. I wanted to shake him and tell him to follow doctor’s orders.

His aftershave knocked me back in my seat with my hand fanning myself. It was ripe with a high dose of testosterone which exuded from every pore of his body. This man stood head and shoulders above the rest.

“That man has clearly gotten you wrapped around his little finger. I have a good mind to invite him to have a few drinks with us. A little socializing doesn’t hurt anyone. He’s probably embarrassed and doesn’t want sympathy. I think I can use some male persuasion to get him to have one drink with us. Wish me luck. I’m going in without a flak jacket.” He was a whiz kid on the computers, but Henry was barely able to lift his own body weight.

My parents were retired living the high life in Las Vegas spending what was my college tuition. They had my permission after my father had a health scare of a heart attack. It landed him in the hospital for almost two months with complications. I felt a little cheated, but my job paid quite handsomely. It didn’t make me happy.

“I would be very careful about poking the wounded bear. He might not feel kindly about being ambushed.” I didn’t think he had a hope in hell of getting him to join us. I gave him credit for having the courage to step into the Lions’ den.

“I’m sure he’s a teddy bear once you get to know him.” Henry was wearing a bow tie and I’d heard through the office grapevine that he was a sought-after commodity by the gay community.

“Henry, I took a look at his file and most of it is redacted.” I watched him approach, sidestepping the Christmas tree in the middle of the hallway.

The whole office was decorated for the holidays. It was a little gaudy and made me feel like Christmas had thrown up all over the place. I wasn’t much for festive celebrations. There was a lot of hype for one day. It was a little sickening to see decorations already up right after Halloween. It was still three weeks away and there was no sign of snow in the forecast. It was unseasonably warm, but I wasn’t about to complain.

“I have some good news and some bad news.” I looked up to see Henry smiling smugly like he had done the impossible. “The good news is he’s going to join us for a drink across the street after work. The bad news is I thought I saw a wedding ring on his finger.” In one breath he managed to burst my bubble.

Unfortunately, it meant that I was going to have to make small talk with a man that was off limits. It was the story of my life.