Chapter Eleven

Gail

I was warming my feet and hands by the fire with a cup of warm brandy clutched between my fingers. I couldn’t get rid of the shiver running down my spine and through my lower extremities.

“I hope you don’t mind, but I’m going to take a shower before we begin. There’s certainly room for two if you wanted to join me.” I gave him a dirty look and he smiled like he was expecting it.

“I’m going to sit here at the fire you made with your bare hands. It’s a good thing you are good for something. Don’t take long or you might find me sleeping soundly. I have the tendency to sleep through a hurricane.” He was taking off his shirt in front of me with no shame.

“Go ahead and close your eyes for a few minutes to catch your breath. I have an interesting way of waking you up without using my hands.” I slapped my knees together mimicking a chastity belt closing shut any possibility of getting physical.

“I don’t know what you’re trying to prove, but I know the hidden meaning behind your words. This is highly unorthodox. I can tell you’re excited to be with me. Keep it in your pants where it belongs, mister.” I had the files in a tangible format of papers littering the floor.

“I’m not sure what you mean.” I heard his zipper and I darted my eyes around without turning in my chair.

“If you are expecting me to turn around then you’re going to be waiting a very long time.” From my vantage point, I could see the notations I had made on some of the papers.

“You know you want to look. What possible harm could come from a little show and tell?” I knew exactly what would happen and how close I was to jumping into his arms for a repeat performance of last night.

“Stop screwing around and this is more important than your classless attempt to get into my pants. I don’t have any intention of doing anything with you besides work.” That damn wedding ring was keeping me from throwing good sense out of the window.

“I’m only kidding. This is my way of trying to get you to relax.” My whole body was like a live wire ready to go off at the slightest provocation.

“I’m as relaxed as I’m going to be under the circumstances. Don’t even think about taking advantage of me. I always sleep with one eye open.” I waited until I heard his footsteps going up the stairs.

The wood stove was a throwback to a different era and I could see the flames licking between the slats in the metal door. It was pure black with a pipe jutting out of the roof.

The furniture was customary for a cabin of this variety. There was even a moose head on the wall and a shotgun hanging below it. I got up and walked around to see the sparse kitchen with very little cutlery. There was not even a knife block. He had one pot and pan and a couple of utensils. This screamed a bachelor pad, but it also made me see him as a recluse.

I heard the shower running with one lone occupant and I looked up to see the steam coming out from underneath the door. The temptation to scrub those hard to reach places for him was prevalent in my mind.

“I know you’re probably sneaking around down there, but try to show some respect for my privacy. I know how hard it is for you when you have seen me naked. It might seem I have very little, but I have what I need and not what I want. I live a minimalist lifestyle. I do have a few luxuries. The jeep was a no-brainer. The snowmobile and the all-terrain vehicle in the shed are perfect for the environment.” I could hear his voice in a higher register to make sure I could hear every single word he was saying.

“A man only needs a few things to survive. Food and water are at the top of that list. You could probably live without female companionship, but you would most likely wither away and die. Don’t you think being out here in the middle of nowhere is hurting your chances to find a relationship?” I let the question linger in the air and I went through his fridge to find the basics.

He had several condiments, a package of expired hamburger, and the date on the milk made me hesitant to even open it up. There was no telling what I was going to find in his freezer. There was a medley of freeze fried family entrees. I had a feeling he hadn’t seen a good home cooked meal in quite some time. His only saving grace was he had the good sense to go with a brand name. Hungry man dinners had everything for a growing boy.

“It would take a unique kind of woman to handle my mood swings. Take what you go through at a certain time of the month and multiply it by a hundred.” I had heard of the condition post-traumatic stress disorder, but I had never seen it for myself.

“A woman would have to be out of her damn mind to live here with you. They would take one look at this place and automatically label you as some kind of anarchist.” There was a small lake beyond the deck connected to the kitchen. It was covered with snow, but I could make out some wildlife foraging for food.

“You would be surprised at how their curiosity can get the best of them.” I felt a little out of my element and there was not even a trace of a feminine touch.

“Spare me the details of your carnal trysts.” There was a spare bathroom downstairs with a sink and a toilet.

I went through his medicine cabinet and found various pills with names I couldn’t pronounce. I did recognize one for being a very powerful painkiller. He must’ve received a prescription for the injury to his knee. The bottle hadn’t even been cracked open.

“If it makes you feel any better nobody can hold a candle to you. I know you’re trying to peel back the layers to see if there’s a bleeding-heart underneath. I can assure you I bleed nothing but red, white, and blue. My patriotism is not on trial.” It wasn’t fair to judge him by the brief look I had behind the curtain of the man.

“I mean no offense and I was only trying to break the awkward silence. I have the bad habit of saying what is on my mind without a filter. I learned a long time ago the only way to know what somebody is thinking is by asking.” I walked up the stairs and made my way quietly down the hall past the bathroom.

I found his master bedroom with a king size bed and a rolled-up cot by the window. The place was immaculate and he really did take pride in his place of residence. There was a multitude of different photographs with people smiling in uniform.

I got a little closer and found myself staring at Colby’s face. It was a big coincidence for him to know my brother. Was it possible he knew more about me than he was saying? Colby was surrounded by his comrades in arms and one very familiar face standing behind him. Chase had two fingers over Colby’s head mimicking the devil or maybe bunny ears.

The names of those soldiers were written embossed in gold underneath their photos. My brother’s nickname was Cold Cock and his best friend was a man he referred to as Preacher. The name corresponding to that nickname was Chase.

I saw this red light streaming through the window situated over my breast. I was frozen like my feet were caught in quicksand. I was going to die and there was a sense of calm that came over me. I was ready to join my brother.