Me: Where are you? Are you in hiding?
I’d left Melody fully dressed and ready, her purse on her shoulder, keys in hand, and prepared to leave the apartment directly behind me. I couldn’t understand how she still wasn’t here, seeing as I’d arrived fifteen minutes ago.
Melody: I’m running late.
How was that even possible? I shook my head to myself, thinking, Starbucks. She’d probably stopped at Starbucks.
Me: How do you still have your job?
Melody: I’m fucking my boss.
Me: HAHA! That probably isn’t how we should lead into telling the rest of the staff about our relationship today.
Melody: Maybe we shouldn’t.
Me: WHAT? This was your idea, I’ll remind you. After two showings of I Am Britney Jean, you went on and on about how thoroughly misunderstood Britney Spears has always been and declared that she was my soul sister.
Melody: I was drunk. I’d had a seriously bad day.
Me: I think not. You didn’t break out the hard liquor until after the discussion about coming out in the office as a stand for my truth. I Am William Morris, I think you called it. They need to know the real you, you said.
Melody: I was just excited about learning your middle name.
Me: Sorry, Charlie, but this was your idea. Though, I’m completely behind it, baby. Love you.
Oh, fuck…
You haven’t said that before, Will, my brain taunted. For weeks, I’d been trying to figure out the time to say it for the first time, and this was how I did it? Time sped up and slowed down and turned motherfucking backward as I desperately searched the hollow recesses of my mind for something to say that would fix this. Or erase it. Fucking something.
A full two minutes passed, and I still had nothing.
Melody: Well, this is awkward.
Me: Well. I guess it is. Maybe we’ll deal with it later? Also, it’s not as awkward as you showing me your nipples on the first day. I’ll take a repeat of that when you finally get here, by the way.
Melody: No more hanging out with Thatch for you.
Complete avoidance. I guess that meant she was on board with dealing with it later. A tiny cloud of disappointment mushroomed in my chest. I used my memories of last night together to smother it.
Me: Why?
Melody: Because I’ve noticed a substantial increase in the amount you talk about my nipples since we hung out with them the other night. Like, substantial. Marked. Like, you’ve mentioned them forty times.
Me: Forty? Pshhh. No way. Maybe two dozen. At a push. But they are nice nipples. Can you really blame me here?
Melody: Don’t you have patients to see?
Me: Not until my nurse gets here and tells everyone she’s my girlfriend.
Melody: You expect me to tell everyone?
Me: I suppose I could serenade you with a song…An Ode to Melody’s Nipples.
Melody: I’ll tell everyone.
Me: See you soon.
Me: Oh, by the way…get me a blueberry muffin at Starbucks, would you?
Melody: Uh-oh… Busted.
I chuckled to myself as I set my phone to silent and dropped it onto the top of my desk. Truth was, I had to get busy. I did have patients to see whether Melody was here or not.
Grabbing my coat from the hook as I stood up, I swirled it up and around my shoulders, put my arms through, and pulled the ends of my dress shirt sleeves out at the bottom to make it comfortable.
Unfortunately, Melody’s tardiness meant I was going to have to face the trio up front, first thing in the morning. Not only would they need to bring the patients back and get them settled, but I also hadn’t been able to do a thorough read-through of the first patient’s file.
As I made it to the mouth of the hall and passed by the break room, I steeled myself against the gossip I might find.
I didn’t think anyone had seen Melody in her bloodied state yesterday, but neither of us was completely sure. I didn’t think I’d be able to keep myself quiet or professional if they said anything about the incident while I was there.
“Melissa,” I called. She was so focused on the computer screen in front of her, the sound of my voice made her jump.
Immediately suspicious, I moved from the side to directly behind her, but she hit buttons on the keyboard to make the screen minimize.
Visions of a horrible scenario bloomed in my mind. What if, somehow, someone had gotten a picture of Melody yesterday on their phone and emailed it around to the whole office?
What if all of these women are fucking laughing at her behind her back?
Rage built inside me immediately, and I could tell by the throb in my hands that my blood pressure was through the roof.
Goddammit, I have to know.
Stepping forward and lowering my voice to a controlled growl so the patients in the waiting room couldn’t hear me, I dove headfirst into a grisly line of questioning.
“What were you looking at, Melissa?”
“Nothing, Dr. Cummings.”
I lowered the volume of my voice even further. “Don’t fucking lie to me.”
Her eyes widened in fear. “Okay, I’m so, so sorry.”
I prepared myself.
“Just show it to me.”
God, how am I going to break this to Melody? How am I going to deal with this? Am I going to have to fire everyone and just start all over? Jesus, what a nightma— Wait… Is that a cat with sixteen kittens wearing lipstick?
“What the…”
Definitely not a compromising picture of Melody. Just a BuzzFeed article about kittens.
“I’m so sorry, Dr. Cummings. I know I’m supposed to be working. I swear this won’t happen again.”
I froze, widening my eyes as I tried to figure out how to play this off.
Fuck. Okay…um…
“Good,” I muttered as calmly as possible. “See that it doesn’t.”
Backing away slowly, I didn’t even bother telling her to bring a patient back. I’d just wait for Melody.
Safely back in my office, I sat down in my chair and thought about the implications of telling the office about Melody and my relationship. If I’d been that fired up to rain hellfire on Melissa without even having confirmation of her crimes, I could only imagine what I’d be like if someone actually did something to Melody in the future. No one would ever trust me to be impartial, and to tell the truth, I didn’t even know what HR’s take on our relationship would be. Would she be allowed to keep working with me directly?
Fuck. Relationship aside, she was a brilliant nurse, and I didn’t want to lose her.
Maybe we shouldn’t say anything.
Melody stepped through the door of my office just then, a brown paper Starbucks bag in hand. “Is it safe to come in? I come bearing muffin.”
I rolled my eyes. “I guess they’re talking about me up there?”
“Yep. Apparently, Dr. Cummings hulked out in a rage this morning over a picture of kittens.”
I shook my head as I considered whether I should tell her the truth or not.
I couldn’t see a way out of it, so I went with it. “Yeah…I kind of panicked, thinking she had a picture of you from yesterday. That’s where the anger came from.”
Her face softened into a smile.
“Someone’s protective of me, huh?”
I shrugged. “More than I knew. Though, I’ll note I was nowhere near the Hulk. If you’ll notice, my clothes are still intact.”
She laughed, easy and free, and three little words swelled up inside me until I couldn’t contain them anymore. “I love you, Mel.”
Her laughter cut off abruptly.
“I realize it was kind of ridiculous to tell you in a text message, but…” I shrugged. “It just popped out. I’ve been trying to tell you for weeks.”
“Will…”
“And I’ve been thinking. I don’t think we should tell people here.”
Her face shifted from happy to confused, her eyebrows pulling together. “But I thought…”
“I don’t want things to change. I don’t want things to be more difficult for you in the office—and they will—and I don’t want the shine of your ability to dull because of assumptions.”
“Assumptions?”
“You slept your way to the top assumptions.”
“Will—”
“I love you, Mel. But I’m also seriously impressed by you. You make my life easier when you’re not twenty minutes late…”
She rolled her eyes.
“And I’d miss you if you weren’t with me all the time.”
“We’re going to have to tell them one day.”
“I know.” I wanted to. I wanted to desperately. But for once, I was thinking about the consequences of my actions for someone other than me. “We will one day. I promise.”
“Okay,” she agreed with a nod.
I pulled her close and touched my lips to hers, wishing I could keep her there forever.
“But, Will?”
“Yeah, baby?”
“You should know I love you too.”
Like a vise, my arms constricted around her.
Forever.