Chapter 20
As Michael drove Liz back to the farm, he felt as though he needed to make sure she knew the entire story of what had happened the night before Jess’s fall. “Liz, did Jess tell you how Blake behaved the night before last?”
“No, Michael, she didn’t, but Hailey did. I will be calling the USDF immediately and informing them not to accept Blake McMillan as a sponsor for any U.S. rider. Does Jess intend to press charges?”
“My understanding is that in exchange for Blake leaving her alone, she agreed not to press charges. I’m willing to go along with that, if you agree.”
“I do. I think we’re well rid of Mr. McMillan and hope to never see him again.”
“Now,” Michael said, changing tack. “About Tempest. Since Jess will be out of commission for a while, I propose that you ride Tempest in her stead to make sure he stays in good shape.”
“What about you, Michael?” Liz replied. “Aren’t you still going to be riding?”
“Not for the next few days, at least,” Michael responded. “I want to take care of Jess while she’s recuperating, at least for the first week or two, to make sure she has everything she needs and doesn’t re-injure herself trying to do too much too soon.”
Liz laughed. “For someone who has known Jess only a few weeks, you certainly know her well. That’s exactly what she will try to do, so I advise a great deal of patience in the next two weeks.”
Michael smiled back. “Thanks, Liz. I think I’ll need it.” What Michael didn’t tell Liz was that he had been doing some serious thinking over the past few hours and had decided to notify Mendelssohn that he was quitting the competition for Tempest. It was Jessica who deserved him, and he would bow out so that she could have him and fulfill her dreams. He would find some other way to pay for Ian’s defense. Maybe the U.S. Dressage Team or the British Dressage Team needed a trainer. He was certain Liz and Jessica would provide him with good recommendations. He just wanted to make Jess happy, and he knew that having Tempest would do just that.
When they reached the farm, Michael encouraged Liz to ride Tempest every day to ensure he stayed in good condition, and that he would be ready for Jessica when she recovered. She agreed that would be best, and went up to her room to change, then proceeded to the barn.
Jessica was released from the hospital the following day, and accepted that her three guardian angels would pamper and coddle her for the next few weeks. After less than a week under Michael, Hailey, and Liz’s loving care, Jessica was able to move around the farm with no need of assistance. Liz continued to ride Tempest every day, and Jessica noted that Liz seemed happier and more lighthearted than she had ever seen her. Jessica was troubled, however, by the fact that Michael had stopped riding Tempest. In fact, he didn’t even spend any time with the stallion since her injury. She finally got up the courage to ask Michael about it.
Michael led Jessica into the front parlor, escorted her to a comfortable, overstuffed love seat, and sat next to her. He took her hand, and looked into her eyes. He lost himself in their green-gold brightness and swallowed the lump in his throat. “Jess, I’ve decided to take myself out of the competition for Tempest, and let you have him for yourself.” She opened her mouth to respond, but before she could speak, he continued, “When I saw you lying motionless on the ground after your fall, I realized how close I came to losing you, and knew without a doubt that I love you, and that I hated myself for endangering that love with my selfish and immature behavior. I knew that I could never love anyone as much as I love you. I can’t foresee a future without you in it, and I can’t possibly take advantage of an injury I caused to take your dream away from you.”
Jessica’s throat constricted, and her eyes glistened. Tears began streaming down her face. She knew in her heart that Michael was serious, that he truly wished only the best for her, and that he was willing to sacrifice his own interests to ensure her happiness. He loved her. If only she could accept his love, but she couldn’t. Not until he knew the truth about her, the truth that, once he knew, she was certain would destroy his love. It was time. She had to tell him. Her heart ached knowing the joy of having this deeply sensitive and caring man love her even if it was only for a very short time.
Michael had cupped her face in his hands, and was gently using his thumbs to brush away her tears. He wondered at the sadness he saw in Jessica’s eyes. Maybe he had misjudged and she didn’t return his feelings. Could it be possible that she didn’t love him? He had expected her to be happy, and to return his feelings joyfully. Now, he anxiously waited for her to explain what was causing her unusual reaction to his declaration.
Jessica calmly composed herself and released Michael’s hands. “Michael, before we make any decisions about our future, there’s something I have to tell you. Once I have, you may want to change your mind about spending the rest of your life with me.” She nervously brushed her hands over her thighs, and then clasped them in her lap. Michael reached out and placed a hand over hers. Jessica smiled weakly at him, and began. “When I was young, my family was very close. My mother, father, Hailey and I lived a very ordinary middle-class life in Central Ohio, and were content. At least Hailey, Mom, and I were content. My father felt some pressure to elevate our financial status, so he left a relatively low paying job that he loved and applied for and got a job with a major corporation in our area. The pay was much better, and he did very well at first, but his superiors expected more and more from him, until he found it difficult to cope with the stress without resorting to alcohol.
“Over time, the alcohol became his answer to any problem he encountered, and our family began to suffer because of it. My parents began to fight over Dad’s drinking, and Hailey and I were afraid to be around him. After I graduated high school and went out on my own, working for Liz, I was able to escape for the most part, but I would still have to accompany the family to the annual family reunion picnic a few hours away in Toledo. It never failed that at those picnics, my Dad would drink too much, get angry and belligerent with our relatives, and we would leave in embarrassment. The last year, I decided I wouldn’t go and be humiliated by my Dad’s behavior ever again. My mother begged me to change my mind and go, in part because between Mom and me we were always able to convince my Dad not to try to drive home, but to let one of us drive instead. Even knowing that, out of pure selfishness, I refused. I reassured my Mom that she would be able to get Dad to turn the car keys over to her, and she would be able to drive them home.
“Evidently, that last year, five years ago, that didn’t happen, and my Dad drove drunk, crashed the car, and killed himself and my Mom and permanently injured Hailey.” She looked at Michael as tears streamed down her face. His expression was solemn, but otherwise unreadable. “Michael, it was all my fault. I killed my parents and I’m responsible for Hailey’s injuries. If I had been there, they would be alive and whole right now. So you see, I’m not worthy of your love. I don’t deserve the kind of happiness you’re offering me.” She stood and turned away from him, unable to see his reaction to her confession. “I understand if you don’t ever want to see me again.”
During Jessica’s recitation, Michael had not once taken his hand from hers, nor had he stopped gazing at her downcast face. Now, as she unselfishly offered to remove herself from his life in the very mistaken belief that he would be disgusted with her for her very normal behavior, he found that he loved her even more, if that was possible. He stood and walked to where she was standing, took her by the shoulders and turned her around to face him. He took her hands, squeezed them, and drew them to his mouth, kissing them both before he spoke. “Sweetheart, what you’ve told me changes nothing. If anything, I love you even more for your courage and compassion in taking on the responsibility of raising Hailey and caring for her after everything you both have been through.
“What happened to your parents and Hailey was not your fault. There is no way you can be certain that your presence at the picnic would have changed the outcome. Your mother was accustomed to your father’s propensities and could have done things to prevent the accident even before they got in that car, but she didn’t. Please rest assured that I don’t think badly of you for what happened, and I want you to work on forgiving yourself. I’m sure Hailey has forgiven you, if she ever even believed you at fault to begin with.”
Jessica looked at Michael and couldn’t conceal her shock at what she heard. She searched his eyes for any sign of prevarication, and saw only truth. He still loved her, even knowing what really happened to cause the accident. He was right about Hailey, that she had always assured Jessica she didn’t blame her for the accident, but Jessica had rationalized her forgiveness by thinking that she may not have understood the whole story, so Jessica didn’t believe herself truly forgiven. Somehow, though, she knew deep down that Hailey understood more than she let on, and that she believed there would not have been anything Jessica could have done to prevent the accident, even if she were there with them.
She smiled brilliantly at Michael, her heart free and unburdened for the first time in years. They stood together and embraced. It felt so good to be held in his strong, protective arms. She knew she would never be able to leave this dear, sweet, and very sexy man.
Michael, for his part, felt lighter than air, his heart free of the mistrust and insecurity that he had been living with since his broken engagement. He stepped out of their embrace and looked down at Jessica. “Now, love, what do you say about taking on Tempest? I was serious when I said I intend to take myself out of the competition and let you ride him. He’s yours if you want him. I think you’ll do great with him, and I’m willing to tell Mendelssohn that if he balks at the idea.”
Jessica refused to meet Michael’s gaze, and started to fidget and wring her hands.
“What’s wrong, sweetheart? Don’t you want to compete with Tempest?”
“I do, Michael, but there’s something you should know.” Jessica reached for Michael’s hands and looked into his eyes. “When I was admitted to the hospital after my fall, they ran a series of blood tests, and discovered that I’m pregnant. You’re going to be a father.” She looked hesitantly at Michael to gauge his reaction. She wouldn’t blame him if he were angry with her for withholding the information and waiting until now to tell him, but knowing everything, maybe he would be willing to overlook the delay.
Michael’s face paled for a few seconds, then he cleared his throat, trying to overcome the lump that had suddenly appeared there. A child; conceived in love, a hope for a shared future and a family with the woman he loved. How could he not be thrilled at the thought? His mouth cracked into a huge grin, and he hugged Jessica, picking her up off the floor, and carefully so as not to disturb her broken collar bone, spun her in a circle. By the time they were finished, both were laughing. “This is fantastic!” he cried. “I couldn’t be happier.” He set Jessica gently back down and flashed her a stern look. “I hope that means that you’ll be marrying me sooner rather than later. Maybe even in a few days. As soon as I can get a license.”
Jessica was crying with him, and agreed that they should marry in all haste. Then a worried look crossed Jessica’s face, and Michael was immediately reaching for her hand. “What’s wrong, love? I hope you’re not having second thoughts.
“No, it’s not that at all,” Jessica replied. “It’s just that with the pregnancy I won’t be able to train Tempest or compete with him in the months leading up to the World Cup. You should be his rider, Michael. You know you have a rapport with him that I never had.”
“No, love. I’m not going to spend the entirety of your pregnancy gallivanting all over the world spending all my time riding when I want only to be with you. I’ll be distracted, and won’t ride my best. Tempest deserves better.” He thought for a second. “You know, Liz has been doing great things with Tempest since your injury. Maybe we can convince Mendelssohn that we both agree she should be his rider going forward, at least during the next year leading up to the World Cup.”
Michael further explained to Jessica that during the days that Liz had taken over riding Tempest after Jessica’s fall, he had noticed that Liz and Tempest had arrived at an understanding, and that the two of them performed admirably together. Occasionally, Michael would, at Liz’s request, offer some advice since Liz had little experience riding stallions. Liz had grown to trust Michael’s inputs, and with his help, forged a good working partnership with Tempest. For his part, the stallion had grown to respect Liz, and behaved admirably, eventually showing her the same brilliance under saddle that he had shown Michael.
It didn’t take long for Jessica to come to the same conclusion that Michael had. Liz would be the perfect partner for Tempest going forward. Now, to convince Liz, then Mendelssohn they were right. As it happened, it wasn’t difficult at all to convince Liz that she and Tempest would be great competition partners. The only complicating factor was Liz’s husband, who might have balked at maintaining shared custody of their daughter Amy with Liz’s demanding competition schedule. However, Liz determined that if she could have Tempest at home in Ohio, and compete for most of the year in the U.S., then a few competition dates in Europe wouldn’t be a problem. When consulted, Amy agreed, insisting that everything would be fine, and that between her parents and her aunt Cynthia, all would be well. The icing on the cake had been when Amy had reminded Rick that in Ohio, children have the right to choose which parent they wish to have custody of them, and the older the child is when they make that choice, the more weight the court gives to their preference. At the age of twelve, Amy was old enough to make that decision for herself without much court interference. Rick ultimately had to agree.
Herr Mendelssohn was surprisingly open to the idea, and since Blake McMillan was no longer willing to purchase Tempest, Mendelssohn and the USET agreed that his sponsorship of Liz as Tempest’s rider was the best solution under the circumstances. Both Mendelssohn and Liz agreed that Michael should stay with them as their trainer, and he agreed, subject to Jessica’s needs as her pregnancy advanced.
Unfortunately, Jessica and Michael were not able to marry quite as quickly as they had hoped, due to British customs and immigration laws. However, since Jessica had already obtained a visitor visa for the two months she planned to stay in the UK, through some strings thankfully pulled by the US Equestrian Team, Michael was able to obtain a marriage license relatively quickly. Still, the law in the UK required a twenty-eight day wait from the date the license was issued until they could marry.
On the first day they could legally do it, Jessica and Michael were married. Liz, Hailey, Ian, and Lionel were present to celebrate with them, as were Michael’s parents.
The couple held a quiet wedding reception for a few friends and family at the manor later that day. After initial toasts and ribald comments were made, and the cake was cut, Lionel drew Michael aside for a private conversation. “First, congratulations, man. Jessica is a fantastic woman; beautiful inside and out. You’re a lucky man.”
“Thanks Lionel. I agree with you one hundred percent. You’ve been a great friend to me over the years, Lionel. I really appreciate it.”
Lionel began fidgeting, and looked everywhere but at Michael. “That’s what I need to talk to you about, Mike. I have a confession to make,” Lionel began. “I’ve not been the friend you thought I was. In fact, I’ve done several things over the past few months deliberately intended to make your life miserable.”
Michael at first thought Lionel was joking, but when he saw Lionel’s serious, even shameful expression, he took note. “Tell me, Lionel. What have you done?”
“I’m the person responsible for Emma breaking your engagement,” Lionel confessed. “I led her to believe, through the planting of forged love notes and false receipts, that you were having affairs with many of your female clients. I also was the person who tampered with Tempest’s stall and left the grain room door open.”
“You what?!” Michael’s raised voice gained the attention of others standing nearby, so he modulated his tone so others wouldn’t overhear. “That can’t be true, Lionel. You’re my friend, have been since we were kids.”
“Unfortunately, it’s true. After you turned me in for cheating at the Olympic trials, I hated you. I blamed you for my disgrace and the misfortune that followed me after that, and even for Nigel’s death. I vowed to have my revenge by making your life as miserable as you made mine. The rub was, and I didn’t realize it until I started working with Rocky, that I and only I was responsible for my lapse in judgment at the trials. I was the one who let my deeply held feelings of insecurity and inadequacy lead me to think that the only way I could win a spot on the team was to cheat.”
“The irony,” Michael added, “was that you were, and still are, a talented rider in your own right, and probably would have made the team if you hadn’t resorted to cheating.”
“We’ll never know for sure, but you’re probably right. In any event, I wanted to tell you how sorry I am that I caused you so much pain. I deeply regret my actions. If there’s anything I can do to make it up to you, I am happy to do it.”
Michael looked up from their conversation and searched the room for Jessica. His eyes were unerringly drawn to her tall, lithe figure across the room, speaking with his brother Ian. She immediately sensed his gaze, and interrupted her conversation to return it and flashed him a joyful smile. Michael winked at her and grinned, even now feeling the electricity flow between them, then returned his attention to Lionel. “Li, if you hadn’t interfered and caused Emma to leave me, I never would have met Jessica, whose presence in my life has made me the happiest of men, so I can’t bear a grudge. You did me a tremendous favor in that regard. For that I can only be grateful. However, if you still want to do something that will make me happy, continue your work with an emphasis on abused and neglected horses. You have a gift for it, and can truly make a difference.”
Lionel nodded in agreement, grateful that Michael was so forgiving. It would be no hardship for him to focus his business on rehabilitating abused and neglected horses and finding new homes for them. In fact, he looked forward to the challenge. A new life awaited him, and he was eager to step into it.
Time was growing late, and Michael was impatient to spend his wedding night with his new wife. Over the course of the reception, he and Jessica had exchanged heated glances several times, so he knew she felt the same. Finally, the night was drawing near, and their guests were taking their leave. As a courtesy to the fact that this was to be Michael and Jessica’s wedding night, Liz and Hailey had offered to spend the night in an Inn in Guildford, so the couple could have the manor house to themselves for the night. They had gratefully accepted the offer. As they sent Hailey and Liz off for the evening, Michael wrapped his arm around Jessica’s waist, and started up to what was once his, but was now their bedroom. Jessica halted their progress, however, and flashed a worried look at Michael. He frowned in response.
“What’s the matter, love?” he asked. “Why are you troubled?”
“Shouldn’t we check on the horses, especially Tempest, before we go to bed?”
“I’m sure Tiffany covered night check, but if you insist, we can go out to the barn and make sure the horses are all right.” Although impatient to get Jessica alone in his bed, Michael guessed that there was more to Jessica’s request than just making sure the horses were settled for the night.
She smiled warmly at him in thanks, and they turned from the stairs to make their way to the barn. Michael removed his arm from Jessica’s waist, and grasped her hand, intertwining their fingers as they progressed out the door and out to the peacefully quiet stable.
Once in the stable, Jessica went directly to Tempest’s stall. The stallion’s head was hanging out over the stall door as if he had been waiting for them to come. He saw the couple and nickered softly to them. Jessica approached him first, and reached up to stroke his forehead. “Somehow I knew you would be waiting for us,” Jessica murmured to the stallion fondly. “You think yourself a matchmaker, don’t you?” To Michael’s surprise, the stallion nodded his head emphatically, then gently rested his forehead against Jessica’s chest, sighing with contentment. She laughed and stoked his cheeks, and throatlatch. “You do, you scoundrel. Well, in a way, I think you’re right.” She looked mischievously at Michael.
Michael heaved an exaggeratedly heavy sigh and rolled his eyes, although Jessica could see the mischievous glint shining from them. “Yes, I suppose he is ultimately responsible. If he had not been available from the beginning, we most likely would never have met, and his misbehavior at critical times, did lead us toward each other.” He stroked the stallion’s neck fondly, and the horse sighed in response. Michael continued speaking to the stallion, but his patience was nearing an end, “Now that we’ve gotten that established, I know you’ll understand if I take my wife home and consummate this marriage as soon as possible.” The stallion nodded again in apparent approval, and the couple left, walking arm in arm, back to their home and the rest of their lives together.