Chapter One

Phoenix sat huddled on a rock close to the entrance of the caves. She’d been feeling unusually claustrophobic and felt the need to be outside. She knew better than to wander too far, though, because her brother John would hunt her down, followed by Jayden, her father, and about twenty other people. She was still terrified to travel on her own anyway, especially after almost being raped and killed on a previous venture. Phoenix shuddered even thinking about the men who would have surely killed Sadie and her if Jayden and Chastity hadn’t rescued them.

With the soldiers coming so close to their home, the attack on their caravan while going to the camps and the refugee rescues, everybody in their group needed time to recover. Everyone was overly cautious after all the events of the past few weeks.

Although their numbers grew larger each day, they were far from safe. She watched as the sun started rising, the beautiful oranges and pinks making her sigh out loud. She couldn’t fight the dawning day, no matter how hard she tried to hold back time.

There was a mandatory meeting later that afternoon where the elders would announce what their next plan of action would be. Some people in the caves were ready to push forward with force. They were tired of hiding and done letting an unknown enemy take their land. Phoenix would be happy to stay in their little camp in the woods, where she felt safe most of the time.

She’d rather sit out the fight, not risk losing anyone else she loved. She didn’t want to take on the enemy. They seemed too powerful with their deadly weapons and never-ending numbers.

How could the people of their small community possibly fight real soldiers and win? To top it all, she still didn’t know what to think about Jayden’s transformation, even if it had only been temporary. She knew she had to talk to Jayden, but she didn’t know what to say. She was filled with a mixture of confusion, anger, and grief.

She felt if she could just forget the war, forget her terrifying night, forget everything but the peace of a new dawn, her life would seem almost normal. She could pretend she was in a bubble, the past few years nothing more than a bad dream. If they didn’t speak of what was happening, then maybe it wouldn’t happen anymore.

Phoenix sighed as she brought herself back to reality. She knew pretending something wasn’t real wouldn’t make it go away, but it didn’t hurt to dream. From reliable information they’d received, they knew the enemy forces were in the East, far away from them. The enemy, of course, had camps throughout America, with smaller units strategically placed, but their strongest hold was in what used to be Washington, D.C. They’d taken over the White House and Pentagon, among other government agencies.

The elders had also heard there were many teams of rebels who were fighting against the enemy and winning battles. The elders wanted to attack the enemy’s military bases, get hold of their supplies, and build up fortresses. A shudder ran through Phoenix at the thought of doing something so terrifying. If the enemy learned of their plans, they’d be destroyed before they even came close to accomplishing their ambitious goals.

As Phoenix sat on the jagged rock, the sun slowly rose, so much so that it was impossible to ignore that her time was up. Soon, everyone else would be waking, and they’d quickly find she’d snuck out. Her body hurt as she stood. She hadn’t realized how long she’d been outside, but it was long enough to cause stiffness. Taking just a moment longer, she slowly stretched her muscles. She wasn’t ready to go inside just yet. She couldn’t seem to outrun her concerns, but she could, at least, breathe fresh air for a few more moments.

Sadie was most likely awake, and her first stop would be Phoenix’s room. Phoenix had left her a note and she knew Sadie wouldn’t rat her out. Sadie was her rock and Phoenix couldn’t get through the endless days without her.

She wandered aimlessly next to the outside wall of the caves for about ten minutes before turning herself around. She had to get inside to the dining hall for breakfast, and then attend her classes. Routine was good – it gave her a sense of normalcy in her far from normal existence. Since the battles had started, they weren’t attending school as much, but the elders wanted to keep some level of consistency in their lives and insisted on having regular schedules.

Phoenix would much prefer to pick food outdoors, or even just socialize with her friends. She could hardly pay attention in classes since her own thoughts refused to slow down long enough for her to focus. She was thinking about Jayden most of the time and what exactly she was going to do about their situation. With as much time as she’d spent thinking about it, she should’ve had an answer.

The boxing class was fun, at least, and she could take out her aggression and feelings of helplessness on some unsuspecting student. Already, several of the kids refused to spar with her. None of the girls would do it, but that was okay with her because she got a thrill from defeating the much stronger guys. She grinned at the thought.

Phoenix finally made it back to the entrance of the caves, glad no one was standing there waiting. She was running so late by that point that she was sure to get lectured. Life could certainly be worse. She could be locked up in the caves, day and night, instead of being allowed fresh air and sunlight. Plus, they had plenty of food, unlike so many of the stragglers who were nothing but skin and bones when they showed up.

They were also lucky, in the middle of their chaotic world, to still be together. She had her mother, father, and brother. She felt a pang of sorrow as she thought about her grandparents. Her grandmother had died when she was too young to truly remember her, but Phoenix and her grandfather had been close. They’d shared a bond that not even death could sever. She had to believe in an existence past death. Otherwise, what was the purpose of loving another human being so much? If she didn’t think she’d one day see her grandpa again, she couldn’t bear the agony of his loss.

He always smelled like cigars and mint. He smoked up until the day he passed, and whenever she saw a tobacco pipe, it brought a smile to her face. He would suck on Lifesaver mints, trying to mask the smoke smell, though he wasn’t fooling anyone. She was almost grateful he’d passed before the war started. When he did pass, she hadn’t been grateful – not at all. She’d mourned his loss for months, wishing she’d had even one more day with him.

She was nine years old on her last day with him. They went to church, where he slipped her chocolates throughout the sermon. She tried to be a good girl and listen, but it was always so boring. She didn’t understand how the preacher kept saying the same thing every single week, and all the people acted as if he was bestowing great words of wisdom on them. She did love the music at the beginning, though, and felt such pride watching John just starting to play guitar in the church band when they’d had to leave and go into hiding. He was exceptionally good. Their dad had made sure to bring his guitars to the caves.

They even had concerts in the caves once in a while. It wasn’t too often, as they tended to get loud and the elders feared the enemy would come close and hear them, though they’d have to be right at the entrance to hear a sound from inside. The cave walls were thick and pretty much soundproof.

Phoenix carefully made her way along the narrow corridors of the caves as her mind drifted in a sea of memories from the past. She hugged the walls and jumped at every little sound, anxious about getting caught. Once she got to a corner and peaked around, she let out a relieved breath when she saw that no one was blocking her path. So far so good, she thought with a broad smile. It was funny to think how proud she was of herself for sneaking in and out of the caves. What a silly thing to feel accomplished over.

Phoenix made it all the way back to her room undetected, or so she thought. She sighed in relief as she leaned against her door. She’d done it. She looked at her dresser and saw the note she’d left Sadie. She picked it up. She knew Sadie had been there because she’d left her signature happy face on the bottom. Sadie would distract John and the others, giving Phoenix time to make it to their table. They were used to Phoenix running late anyway. If she didn’t hurry, though, John would come hunt her down.

She quickly changed clothes, stashing her dirty ones in the corner. She grumbled to herself when she realized she would have to do laundry that afternoon. Laundry was such a pain. It was one of those things that made her appreciate the conveniences they used to have at home. Her mother had just started teaching her how to wash her own clothes before they’d gone into hiding. She thought about how stupid she was to have complained about loading her clothes into a machine that did all the work. She’d been so spoiled without even realizing it. She knew her parents would still love to spoil her, and they did the best they could, considering their circumstances.

Although Phoenix knew she needed to go to breakfast, she sat on her bed, delaying her appearance in the crowded dining hall. When she was just about to get up, she heard a familiar scratching noise on her door and her face lit up. Patches was there to see her. She was surprised, considering there was food in the dining room with lots of scraps to be had, but she gladly opened the door and Patches strolled in, immediately jumping on her bed, wagging his tail in greeting. She didn’t get to see him as much, since all the kids vied for his attention.

“How are you doing, precious?” she said as she scratched him behind the ears. She got a quick swipe of his tongue along her cheek in reply. Patches always made her giggle and she felt her last remaining tension float away. She missed her old life, the carefree days when she’d been comfortable, happy, and naive, but as she held the dog, she was able to also appreciate what she had in the caves. Patches just had a way about him that made everything feel right.

She kept snacks in her room for when Patches visited, so she got up and retrieved a couple pieces of jerky from her hiding place. Patches knew well what was in that dresser drawer and sat up, with his tongue hanging out, patiently waiting. He never went without food, though he acted as if he did. She thought maybe it was because of the time he was lost and starving in the vast forest. Those memories probably never faded, even for a dog.

“Shake,” she said. Phoenix had been working on tricks with him since he was a puppy. She’d taught him to shake, speak, and roll over. The younger kids got a real kick out of it and were constantly giving Patches treats so he’d do tricks repeatedly. He was quite the ham and ate up the attention. “That’s a good boy,” she said, giving him the rest of the treat and scratching him behind the ears. “We better get to breakfast,” she said with a sigh.

Patches cocked his head as if he understood and was sympathetic to her plight. She had to smile at his lovable face before she headed out the door. Patches was close on her heels, still wagging his tail.

Phoenix walked toward the dining room, dragging her feet. She heard the laughter and voices coming from the room before she even stepped inside. Her heart sped up as she turned the corner and spotted Jayden. She didn’t know if he’d been watching the doorway the entire time, or somehow he’d sensed her there, but their eyes locked together and she froze, unable to command herself to move forward. She still didn’t know what to say to him. She hoped if she buried her head in the sand long enough, her problems would just disappear. She was almost in a panic over joining Jayden and her friends at their usual table. She couldn’t sit anywhere else. That would be too weird, and it would cause questions she didn’t want to answer.

“Hurry up and get your food, Phoenix. You’re really late,” Sadie called, breaking the uncomfortable moment. Patches nudged her leg and Phoenix went right to the counter. There wasn’t a line for food, so she quickly collected her tray and made her way toward the table. There was a spot open right by Jayden, but she was too nervous to sit next to him. She nudged Brian out of the way and sat by Sadie. No one seemed to notice except Jayden, who stared her down. She glanced at him and then looked away. She didn’t notice the narrowing of his eyes or the determined glint within them.